3 things to keep in mind when dealing with butter bars

As a prior butter bar, I want you to know that I have no regrets about my career choice.

Sure, when I signed up for the military, I thought I was going to get to do a little less paperwork and a little more single handedly saving the entire world from terrorism for all time with my bravery, but hey, we all have our roles to play. Mine was to ensure my people were able to conduct mission ops — and deep down, I know that’s important, too.

I was very calculated about which branch I would serve in (Air Force, duh — I’m not a masochist) and how I would earn my commission (on the beaches of Southern California, like a BAMF). We trained on Fridays, and I was super into it (ROTC nerd to an extreme level) so I also attended optional Saturday morning training, which meant I missed out on the collegiate Thirsty Thursday, Friday night parties, and Saturday night shenanigans (because I was tired from all that training, bro).

So it really wasn’t until active duty that I realized how much lieutenants could party.

Also read: How to not be a dirtbag CGO

1. They like to have a good time

When we were at intel school at Goodfellow AFB, Texas, we set up a “pub crawl” where everyone served signature drinks from their dorm rooms — everything from a shot of Jeremiah Weed to a game of flip cup to Vodka mixed with Airborne tablets (“to help our immune systems.”)

My first Gin and Tonic was consumed in the SCIF while cramming for the Navy test (does one really need to be sober to learn about boats? I mean ships…).

In Korea, the pilots partied so hard I started carrying a sharpie with me so I could make a tic-mark on my palm to track my drinks. Most nights left me waking up with a bar code across my palm.

But beyond the drinking, the butter bars in the office are more likely to liven up the office with pranks and jokes — and let’s not forget who keeps the snack bar full.

Related: This musician and veteran invented Jell-O shots to beat base alcohol rules

2. It’s not their fault they’re n00bs

Butter bars have it great. They have enough training under their belts to feel confident about testing themselves but not enough experience for any serious responsibility. It’s a carefree time. The good ones acknowledge their shortcomings and learn quickly. The crappy ones… well, you can read some of their stories in the comments on this post (and add your own — it’s hilarious!).

The point is, butter bars are precious. They’re bright eyed and ready for a good time. They don’t know that the sh*t is about to get real. Look out for them. Show them the way.

3. They’re the future brass

Four-stars have to start somewhere, right? Their experiences as CGOs will have an effect on their leadership style down the road, so help them out. Teach them the mission. Remind them of what’s important. Show them the value of mutual respect.

They’ll remember it later and we’ll all be better for it.

And for all you 0-1s out there, work hard before you play hard. You might be at the bottom of the officer ranks now, but you’ve still got men and women who rely on you.

Oh, when you do just want to have a little fun, here’s a playlist for your partying needs (it’s okay to admit you like pop songs — you’re in safe space):

TOP ARTICLES
Now that ISIS is on the ropes, these guys have turned the guns on eachother

Two US allies, which were armed and trained by US forces, have turned their weapons on each other, and there isn't much the US can do about it.

This is the definitive history of the world's most advanced fighter jet

The new F-22A Raptor fighter jet is the most advance fighter jet in the world, and it dominates on every level imaginable.

This is how the $102 million B-1A almost replaced the B-52

The plan was to buy 240 B-1As to replace the B-52 as the Air Force's primary strategic bomber, but eventually, they each found their place in the force.

ISIS has finally been defeated in Raqqa

U.S.-backed Syrian forces liberated the city of Raqqa on Oct. 17 from Islamic State militants in a major defeat for the collapsing extremist group.

How North Korean special operators plan to invade the South via paragliders

North Korean special operators may be planning to paraglide into South Korea in an attack the country simulated in mid-September, according to South Korea.

This Halloween-themed bomb was as dumb as it sounds

Still a few years out from the Manhattan Project being completed, a dentist / mad scientist came up with a disastrous and inhumane plan — the "bat bomb."

These are the contenders flying off to replace the A-10

Four planes are flying off for the chance to try to replace the beloved A-10 Thunderbolt. Here's how they hold up.

This was a major problem with the South Vietnamese army

"Be glad to trade you some ARVN rifles. Ain't never been fired and only dropped once." — Cowboy from "Full Metal Jacket."

9 reasons why you should have joined the Army instead

The only down side is knowing that when you get out, you will never be as cool as you were when you were doing "Hooah things" with your boys.

7 things all troops should know before becoming a sniper

With Hollywood tapping into the sniper lifestyle with films like "American Sniper," many young troops get a misconception what it's like to be one.