Military Life

6 things platoon medics absolutely hate

Navy Corpsmen and Army medics are some of the best medical professionals in the world who go above and beyond to render care to sick and wounded troops in the line of duty.

Although the armed forces' "docs" have earned tons of combat decorations throughout their proud history, not every part of the job feels valorous or glamorous. In fact, many docs must accomplish tasks they absolutely hate in order to do their job well. Here are just a few of unpleasant functions the job requires.


1. Taking care of a bad guy

The Geneva Convention requires that docs care for wounded bad guys, regardless of how they were injured. It's no fun knowing you're helping a guy who just might take a pot shot at you later.

2. Not being in the safety vehicle during a mandatory hike

Realistically, there aren't many troops out there who look forward to a mandatory conditioning hike.

Several miles into the excursion, when your feet are beyond swollen, you'll start to curse (in your mind) when you see the smiling faces of personnel in the safety vehicles. They're just chilling.

3. Sick-call commandos

We dislike those weak-minded troops who show up and waste the medical staff's time. The truth is, so-called "sick-call commandos" fake illness to get out of responsibilities, taking time away from other people who need to see the doctor because they're actually ill or injured.

No one like these guys.

4. A troop showing up to sick call 5 minutes after its secured, but we still have to treat them

Monday through Thursday, having a sick or injured troop come in late isn't a big deal. However, imagine it's 1700 on a sunny Friday evening and someone who could technically wait until Monday morning shows up for treatment — not cool.

5. Having to 'bore punch' a patient

If you're not familiar what a "bore punch" is, you'll want to ask the kids to leave the room before we tell you. Okay, they're gone? Cool.

Bore punching is when the doc uses a giant cotton swab to take a sample from inside a male patient's urethra to test for bacteria. It's unpleasant for both parties.

6. When a Navy Corpsman gets called a 'medic'

There's a perpetual debate on the differences between Corpsmen and medics. The truth is, they're very much alike aside from the branches under which they serve. That, and Corpsmen are way more decorated... and sexy.

That said, they hate being called a "medics" instead of the proper term, which is "Corpsman." "Doc" works, too.

(Universal Pictures)