Articles

The 6 rations troops are thankful the military got rid of

A good meal after a hard day in the field can make everything a little bit better. MREs aren't that meal but they try to be. Everyone has their favorite ration meal, even if he or she has to doctor it up a bit by mixing different parts from other packages (here's a list of ration recipes).


"MREs haven't been invented yet, but I still hate Country Captain Chicken."

Related: These 17 hilarious reviews of new MREs from troops in the field will bring back memories >

No matter how U.S. military rations change, there is always one meal in the box which makes you wonder who thought it would be a good idea. This is a list of those meals that made us yearn for the days of lettuce and powdered eggs from a field mess.

1. Vegetable Omelette

It's understandable the military would want to come up with vegetarian options. Why anyone decided eggs would be a good idea is what's hard to understand. Cheese tortellini wasn't bad, why not use that as a starting point?

Instead, we have this monstrosity, aka the "vomelet," which has all the flavor of cold scrambled eggs and all the texture of dried papier maché. It's every bit what you imagine eating Spongebob Squarepants must be like.

(Image: WATM/MREInfo.com)

2. Ham and Lima Beans

This is a throwback meal to the days of C-Rations. Lima Beans and Ham (aka "Ham and Motherf**kers") was so bad, it was the Voldemort of field grade lunches, as troops wouldn't even dare to say this meal's name. When GIs gave rations to hungry civilians in Korea, the Koreans would throw this particular meal back at them. Troops added cans of cheese sauce and/or cracker crumbs to try to make this war crime palatable.

(Image: WATM/MREInfo.com)

3. Jamaican Pork Chop

Jah, mon! Come on have little slice of this leather with some pepper on it. Uncle Sam try'nta save jah money by feeding jah garbage rejected by hog farms.

Seriously, if we're talking about jerks, it's the clowns who wanted to give us some of our favorite international cuisine but decided Jamaica was close enough. This is like eating the sole of your boot with noodles. To be fair, the guys over at MRE Info love this one.

(Image: WATM/MREInfo.com)

 4. Country Captain Chicken

Country Captain Chicken will give you Current Traumatic Stress Disorder. Imagine someone squished together a handful of Chicken McNuggets, flattened it out, then dried it in the sun for ten days. Then imagine they soaked the newly formed patty in a bath of tomato sauce and citrus juice, and what the hell, let's throw a couple of almonds in there. Chunks of tomato and black beans round out the most awful thing anyone ever tried to pass off as food.

(Image: WATM/MREInfo.com)

5. Buffalo Chicken

Buffalo Chicken might be the signature flavor of America and while the MRE version of Buffalo Chicken may not be all that bad, the effect on your stomach is like having forty tailgating Bills fans making a mess of your insides. Dig the latrine before you crack this bad boy open.

6. Beef Frankfurters

You know a meal has to be good when its nickname is "Fingers of Death," right? Right. Beef Frankfurters deserved every single insult ever lobbed at them. While I can understand the urge to give troops in the field a taste of home through a good ol' American hot dog, if you've ever tried this ration, the only home it makes you think of is Hannibal Lecter's.

(Image: WATM/MREInfo.com)

For the record, the military does try to taste test these things on service members. When they created a new menu in 2007, the received some interesting responses. The Smoking Gun found the comments for some of the tested meals, in case you've ever wondered just how some of these meal ever made it to production.

Do they still serve Chicken Tetrazzini?

China is stealing American technology to grow its sub fleet

China has made marked advancements in its undersea-warfare capabilities and is using stolen US technology to further that progress, US Navy Adm. Philip Davidson told the Senate Armed Services Committee on April 17, 2018.

Davidson, who was before the committee as the nominee to lead US Pacific Command, told senators in written testimony that while the US has a "significant asymmetric advantage in undersea warfare," the Chinese navy "is making progress" and that Beijing "has identified undersea warfare as a priority, both for increasing their own capabilities as well as challenging ours."

Keep reading... Show less
Articles

How R. Lee Ermey's Hollywood break is an inspiration to us all

While there have been many outstanding actors and celebrities who have raised their right hand, there has never been a veteran who could finger point his way to the top of Hollywood stardom quite like the late great Gunnery Sergeant R. Lee Ermey.

Keep reading... Show less
International

This is what makes SAS selection the toughest in the world

The Special Air Service is the longest active special missions unit in existence and has remained one of the best. Staffed with the toughest and most resourceful enlisted and commissioned soldiers the United Kingdom has to offer, the SAS only accepts the cream of the crop. Of all candidates who try to earn the coveted beige beret and the title of "Blade," only the very best make it through.

Keep reading... Show less
History

6 reasons why being a Roman Legionnaire would suck

The Roman Empire stretched from modern-day Syria to modern-day Spain. To maintain that amount of real estate, you have to have an amazing military to protect it. The Roman Legion was one such force.

But every military that has made its mark on history was notorious for rigorous training and extremely harsh conditions that make today's toughest Special Operations training look like Air Force boot camp. Here's why, in reality, being a Roman Legionnaire would've sucked.

Keep reading... Show less

The unbelievable way President Trump cut to the chase with Israel

President Donald Trump reportedly put a blunt question to Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu by asking if the leader of the Jewish state genuinely wanted peace.

Axios' Jonathan Swan reported that, in a phone call with Netanyahu in 2017, Trump shocked his aides by getting straight to the point and pressing the Israeli leader on making a deal with Palestine.

Keep reading... Show less

The Air Force has 'natural' explanations for all these UFO sightings

From 1947 to 1970, the United States Air Force conducted investigations into the increasing number of unidentified flying object (UFO) sightings throughout the United States. The purpose of the investigations was to assess the nature of these sightings and determine if they posed any potential threat to the U.S.

Three successive projects were created to carry out these investigations: Sign, Grudge, and Blue Book.

Keep reading... Show less

How to properly seal a gas mask without shaving your beard

Warfighters have charged into battle throughout history with fully bearded chins. Sadly, the need to survival chemical weapons attacks has overshadowed the need to keep one's chin beautiful.

Today, the most widely stated reason for requiring troops to keep a clean-shaven face is because facial hair prevents the proper sealing of a gas mask. Many studies and personnel trials have proven this true time and time again. That's right, folks. Chemical weapons are so evil that they've even killed beards.

Keep reading... Show less
History

This is why some Civil War battles have two names

The Battle of Antietam is also known as Sharpsburg. Bull Run is also called Manassas. Shiloh is also Pittsburg Landing. Some of these may be familiar to you, some of them may sound weird. But there is a reason for it, and it's mainly because of the Soldiers who fought the War Between the States.

Keep reading... Show less