This is why officers should just stay in the office - We Are The Mighty
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This is why officers should just stay in the office

Army Sgt. David Logan Nye just wanted to do his job during his first combat deployment.


But that’s not how the military works.

Who needs a metal detector when you have hopes and dreams? (Go90 No Sh*t There I Was Screenshot)

Also read: This is why the military shouldn’t completely outlaw hazing

In this episode of No Sh*t There I Was, Nye sets off on a fools-errand with a bunch of high brass and a very stressed out guy charged with detecting IEDs. When they hear a call on the radio that a potential insurgent is fleeing a checkpoint, they take off running to intercept — leaving the metal detector behind.

“Pass the guy protecting us from IEDs…because there are too many probable IEDs on the ground…?” Nye’s inner monologue reflects that of everyone who has ever had to deal with an overly-enthusiastic boss.

Luckily, the rag-tag group of heroes didn’t encounter any IEDs that day, but they did stumble upon something else much more…groovy? Check out the video at the top to see what it was.

Oh, and to my fellow officers out there, let’s try to get in the way of the experts a little less, shall we?

Watch more No Sh*t There I Was:

Why it sucks to report to the ‘Good Idea Fairy’

A Ranger describes what being a ‘towed jumper’ is actually like

Why you should never run through smoke you didn’t throw

Smooth talking your way through gear turn-in is a stinky proposition

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Four exotic weapons that will make you rethink ancient warfare

When most think of ancient warfare, nothing more sophisticated than spears, bows, and maybe catapults come to mind. But like in modern warfare, few things breed ingenuity more than the need to outgun the enemy. Here are some of the more elaborate examples:


1. Claw of Archimedes

Archimedes, the famed Greek mathematician and inventor, developed a variety of weapons to aid in the defense of his home city of Syracuse, Sicily. This included improved versions of conventional artillery like catapults and ballistas, but he also designed more exotic devices to defend Syracuse’s seawall from attacking Roman ships during the Second Punic War.

Though the exact design of the Claw of Archimedes is not known, it is believed to have been a large crane fitted with a gigantic grappling hook. As Roman ships approached the wall, it would be deployed over them, snagging them with the hook, and then lifting the ship at least partially out of the water. When released, the ship would capsize or at least be dropped violently back into the water, damaging the vessel and throwing crewmen overboard.

The Roman historian Livy contended that the Roman fleet suffered terrible casualties from this device. A team working for the Discovery Channel recreated the device using technology that would have been available at the time and used it to capsize a replica of a Roman galley, proving that the device could have been effective.

2. Heat Ray

Another of Archimedes inventions–far more controversial and shrouded in mystery–is a form of heat ray designed to set enemy ships on fire. A strategically placed series of mirrors would focus the sun’s rays onto a single point on an enemy ship and ignite it, like a magnifying glass used to ignite paper. Most Roman ships of the era were coated with pitch as a sealant, which would only make the target more flammable.

Though some ancient historians record that such a weapon was used during the 212 B.C. siege of Syracuse, attempted recreations conducted by the Massachusetts Institute of Technology and others concluded that the weapon was almost ridiculously impractical. It was completely dependent on the position of the sun and a utter lack of cloud cover, and could only function on a completely stationary target due to the time required for it to achieve ignition.

Even if it succeeded, at best it could create small, easily extinguishable fires. Regular flaming arrows and catapult ammunition would have far more range and effectiveness, not to mention being easier to deploy.The only practical function such a weapon would have is to use its rays to temporarily blind the crews and marines of the attacking ships. Despite its shortcomings, the novel concept of using light as a lethal weapon presages modern laser technology that is still under development to this day.

3. Biological Warfare

After a series of disputes, the Mongolian Golden Horde laid siege to the Genoese trading city of Caffa in 1346, in what is in the modern day Crimea. The bubonic plague had already started to ravage Crimea, and it rapidly spread to the besieging Mongolian forces, killing thousands.

According to the memoirs of the Italian Gabriele de’ Mussi, the Mongolian Khan Janibeg had ordered the bodies of his soldiers killed by the plague hurled over Caffa’s walls. De’ Mussi wrote: “Soon the rotting corpses tainted the air and poisoned the water supply, and the stench was so overwhelming that hardly one in several thousand was in a position to flee the remains of the Tartar army. Moreover one infected man could carry the poison to others, and infect people and places with the disease by look alone. No one knew, or could discover, a means of defense.”

It has been theorized that Italian ships fleeing the city helped spread the bubonic plague to Europe and start the Black Death, which may have killed more than a quarter of the continent’s population. Considering how many other sources there were for the plague, however, the siege at Caffa may have only played a small role in the ghastly pandemic.

4. Flamethrowers

Various flaming liquids and incendiary weapons are known to have been in use since antiquity, but it was the Byzantine Empire that created what could be considered an ancient precursor to napalm, though its exact composition has been lost. The substance known as naptha, or Greek fire, was typically used in clay pots thrown by hand or catapult to ignite enemy ships, siege engines, and troops, but it also was used in some the first flamethrowers.

When used on ships, large brass tubes mounted on the prow were filled with naptha, and large blacksmith’s bellows were rapidly pumped to spray the flaming liquid onto enemy ships. Naptha reputedly could only be extinguished with sand, and water would only spread it about and make the fire worse.

Small hand units, called cheiroseiphon, were scaled down versions of the ones used by ships. They were typically used to ignite enemy siege towers, but some ancient Byzantine strategists recommended its use on the battlefield to terrify enemy formations. It may have only been used to spray the liquid before a secondary fire source ignited it, but contemporary Byzantine illuminations show it being used to directly shoot fire.

 

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Teen creates American flag using plastic Army guys

(Photo: Stacey Feazel’s Facebook page)


At a distance it looks like an American Flag, but a closer inspection reveals it’s also an army – one comprised of 4,466 toy soldiers.

High school senior Jacob Feazel from Peru, Indiana created a 4’x6′ American flag using the classic plastic toy ‘army guys.’

In an interview with WishTV,  he said, “The soldiers are what make the U.S. free, you know? They fight for us so I figured it’s honoring them by putting them in the flag.”

Once he was done, his parents posted photos of the patriotic project on Facebook. That gallery has been shared over 188,000 times.

Feazel has received multiple offers to buy his creation, and Grissom Air Reserve base has expressed interest in displaying it. Aside from entering it into a scholarship competition and local art shows, he plans on keeping it.

(Photo: Stacey Feazel’s Facebook page)

Want to make your own ‘Army Guy American Flag”? Here’s what you’ll need:

  • 4,466 toy soldiers (in 7 different poses)
  • A 4’x6′ wood board
  • 20-30 cans of spray paint (red, white, and blue)
  • Glue, lots of glue
Articles

America’s most expensive warship ever built will undoubtedly change naval warfare

An artist’s rendering of a Ford class aircraft carrier. | Public Domain


The U.S. Navy’s 10 Nimitz-class flat-top aircraft carriers are the envy of the world, and yet the Navy has a newer, more powerful, and more advanced carrier in the works: the Ford-class.

Named after U.S. President Gerald Ford, the Navy plans to procure four of these titans of the sea. In the slides below, see how the Fords improve on America’s already imposing fleet of aircraft carriers.

New reactor and an all-electric ship.

Gerald R. Ford sitting in dry dock during construction. | Photo: US Navy Mass Communication Specialist 1st Class Joshua J. Wahl

The new Ford class carriers will feature an improved nuclear reactor with three times the power-generation capacity as the Nimitz class.

This outsized power-generation capacity provides the Fords an opportunity to grow into new technologies that come up during their service life.

With ample power to draw from, the Fords could one day house directed-energy weapons like the Navy’s upcoming railgun.

Watch an F-35 seamlessly take off using an Electromagnetic Aircraft Launch System (EMALS).

The Nimitz class cruisers use an elaborate steam-powered launch system to send F/A-18s and other planes on their way, but the Ford class, drawing on its huge power-generation capacity, will use an electronic system to do the same.

Not only will the EMALS launch heavier planes, but it will also carefully launch planes in order to reduce wear and tear. Additionally, the increased capacity of these launchers to make planes airborne will allow new plane designs in the future.

Example of a steam-powered launch:

New island.

A Nimitz class aircraft carrier, on the bottom, compared to a Ford class, top.

Improved technology means that the island, or the tower on the deck of the carrier, can be moved further aft (toward the tail end of the craft).

This smaller, more out-of-the-way island means that there will be more room and accessibility for the aircraft on the deck, which will improve maintenance times and turnarounds.

Navy planners estimate that the new design will help carriers generate an additional 33% more sorties.

“When aircraft land, they’ll be able to come back, refuel, rearm, in kind of a pit-stop model … really modeled after NASCAR,” Capt. John F. Meier, the commanding officer of Gerald R. Ford said of the new design.

Dual Band Radar.

The Dual Band Radar sensors are housed in flat panels along the sides of the island. | U.S. Navy/Huntington Ingalls Industries/Chris Oxley

The Navy’s Dual Band Radar (DBR) operates simultaneously on two frequencies, enabling the radar to effectively classify low-altitude planes and missiles.

The radar works both to track incoming aircraft and missiles and to support outgoing weapons and planes.

Only the first Ford class carrier, the USS Gerald R. Ford, will carry the DBR. Navy planners are currently evaluating candidates to provide an Enterprise Air Surveillance Radar, which they estimate could save $120 million.

Advanced arresting gear (AAG).

An artist’s conception of an installed Advanced Arresting Gear (AAG) on a US carrier. | General Atomics Image

Another improvement on the Nimitz design, the AAG on the Ford class will help accommodate a broader range of aircraft and offer a less jarring landing than the Navy’s current Mk-7 Mod 3 and Mk-7 Mod 4 designs.

But like other systems on board, the AAG is facing problems. Recently the Navy said it was considering alternatives for future carriers, but that the USS Gerald R. Ford would still carry the system.

Advanced Weapons Elevators.

Sailors assigned to the aircraft carrier USS Ronald Reagan and Carrier Air Wing 14, assemble on an aircraft elevator for a wreath-laying ceremony in remembrance of the sailors who fought and died at the Battle of Midway. Midway is a great moment in US Navy history and is considered by many to be the turning point in the battle of the Pacific during World War II. | US Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 2nd Class Joseph M. Buliavac

It may seem like a simple change, but the new carriers will use electromagnetic fields to raise and lower platforms instead of cabling. This allows a simpler design to compartmentalize the different areas of the ship, which will help reduce maintenance and manning costs over the life of the ship.

Also, new cargo elevators will replace cargo converters, which were labor intensive.

Conclusion.

H Ingalls

Individually, the changes made between the Ford and Nimitz classes seem isolated and inconsequential. But when taken together, the Ford line of aircraft carriers shows the direction forward as envisioned by the U.S.’s naval planners.

The development of the Ford class carriers has been fraught with cost and time overruns, but this is to be expected with a first-in-class vessel.

The great success of the Ford class will not be defined by any one innovation on board, but by the foresight displayed by the designers who are boldly creating a carrier to launch planes that haven’t even been designed yet, to fire weapons not yet built, and to secure the U.S.’s interests at sea for decades to come.

Articles

Being assigned to a bomber crew in WWII was basically a death sentence

During the peak of WWII, being a member of a heavy bomber crew meant you were incredibly brave, and you put your country over yourself — it was that dangerous.


Many considered the occupation to be a death sentence. Nearly 71 percent of the bomber’s crew were either killed or labeled as missing in action, which accounts for approximately 100,000 service members.

Related: These Nazi bunkers were one of the most secure outposts of WWII

One of Germany’s primary defenses against allied bombers was their massive array of anti-aircraft guns. The German ground forces commonly fired at the passing bombers even if they didn’t have a clear line of sight due to overcast conditions.

Typically, the bombers had to fly right through the multiple volleys of gunfire, but it was the “waist-gunners” who absorbed the majority of the shrapnel, as they were positioned near an open window in the rear of the plane.

Damage to the “waist-gunner” area of the bomber accounted 21.6 percent of all the hits the plane took.

The image below shows what areas the heavy bomber was most likely to be hit by the enemies’ air-defense systems according to World War Wings’ video.

There didn’t appear to be a single safe place to hide while on a WWII bomber. (Source: World War Wings/Screenshot)

Also Read: These were the real-life Wonder Women who fought in the world’s bitterest wars

Check out World War Wings‘ video below to see all the statistics for yourself.

(YouTube, World War Wings)

Articles

These 4 wars started after ‘false flag’ attacks

What does an expansionist country do when it needs an excuse to invade a neighbor? Create one, of course. Their smaller, weaker neighbor isn’t going to spark a conflict on their own. It’s the perfect time for a false flag attack, where one country carries out a covert attack, disguising it to look like it was done by someone else.


The term is from old-timey naval warfare, where one ship flew a different nation’s colors before attacking as a means to get closer to their target. “False flag” is not just the stuff of conspiracy theorists and the tin foil hat society, there are actually precedents for this.

This precedent’s a Muslim! Prepare for battle!

False flags happen a lot more often than one might think, which is why conspiracy theorists are so quick to draw that conclusion. The four wars on this list started under false pretenses, so maybe it isn’t that crazy to think false flags aren’t completely gone for good.

1. Mukden Incident  – Japanese Invasion of China

The Japanese set their sights on Chinese Manchuria as soon as they beat the Russians in their 1904-05 war. Japanese soldiers were already stationed in the provinces, ostensibly to protect the Japanese-owned South Manchuria Railway. Those troops were often bored and conducted raids on local villages. While the Chinese government protested, there was little they could do – the Japanese wanted the Chinese to attack their forces as an excuse to invade. The Japanese got tired of waiting.

Yes, that circle is the entirety of the damage. They might as well have claimed China was harboring WMD.

A 1st Lieutenant from the Japanese 29th Infantry planted explosives on the tracks that damaged a 1.5-meter section of rail. It had little effect on the railway’s operations. In fact, a train on the track easily passed over the damaged area. The next day, September 19, 1931, the Japanese started shelling Chinese garrisons and attacked them. In one instance, 500 Japanese troops bested 7,000 or more Chinese. Within the next five months, the Japanese army occupied all of Manchuria. WWII in the Far East had begun.

2. Gleiwitz Incident – The Nazi Invasion of Poland

In August 1939, Nazi SS commandos, dressed as Poles, stormed and captured a radio station in what was then called Upper Silesia, in Germany. The attackers broadcast a short, anti-German message in Polish. The German assailants wanted the appearance of Polish aggression, murdering a German farmer who was caught by the Gestapo and killed with poison. The body was dressed as a saboteur, shot a number of times, and then left in front of the radio station.

Sometimes you gotta raid a radio station.

A few prisoners from the Dachau Concentration Camp received the same treatment, only their identification was made impossible as the Germans destroyed their faces. This was all part of Operation Himmler, designed to create justification for the Nazi invasion of Poland, which began the next day. World War II in Europe was on.

3. The Shelling of Mainila – The Winter War

The Soviet Union was chafing under all of the nonaggression treaties on its Western border. Because peacetime seems to be boring for Communist regimes, Stalin decided he needed to mix things up a bit. Since a war with Nazi Germany seemed like a war he would most definitely lose on his own, he opted instead to invade Finland, a war (he thought) he could win easily. He couldn’t invade Finland legally because he signed a full three treaties that prevented him from doing so, including his entry into the League of Nations. Stalin, nice guy that he was, decided to go ahead anyway and set out to make Finland look like the aggressor.

Stalin could almost be a cuddly guy if he didn’t kill like 25 million people.

On November 26, 1939, the Soviet Red Army shelled the Russian village of Mainila, 800 meters inside Soviet territory. The Finns even saw the explosions and offered to help investigate the incident, which Stalin declined before blaming the whole thing on the Finnish army. Mainila was out of range of the Finnish guns, but that didn’t matter. The Russians already got the propaganda boost and invaded Finland four days later. The war lasted five months and while the Russians captured 11% of Finnish territory, it came at a high cost: the Finns suffered 70,000 casualties while the Soviets had more than a million.

4. The Gulf of Tonkin Incident – The Vietnam War

On August 2nd and 4th, 1964 the USS Maddox was on a signals intelligence patrol in the Gulf of Tonkin off the coast of what was then called North Vietnam. She was confronted by three North Vietnamese torpedo boats who got a little too close for comfort. The Americans fired three warning shots. The Vietnamese opened up on the Maddox from torpedo boats.

Torpedo boats like these.

The Maddox responded with 3- and 5-inch guns. The only thing wrong with that retelling of the incident is everything. The August 2nd attack happened but the Defense Department didn’t respond. The August 4th attack never happened. This is problematic because it was the justification for Congress’ passing of the Gulf of Tonkin Resolution, giving the President full authority to use the military to assist “any member or protocol state of the Southeast Asia Collective Defense Treaty” threatened by Communist aggression without a declaration of war.

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Poland denies existence of Nazi ghost train

Wikipedia/Team Mighty/”Riese Rzeczka korytarz 344″ by Przykuta


After analyzing mining data, Polish experts say there is no World War II-era Nazi ghost train in southwestern Poland, the BBC reports.

In November Polish mining experts began analyzing data from the site where two amateur treasure hunters said they found “irrefutable proof” of a Nazi ghost train filled with stolen gold in late August.

Professor Janusz Madej from Krakow’s Academy of Mining said the geological survey of the site showed that there was no evidence of a train after using magnetic and gravitation methods.

“There may be a tunnel. There is no train,”Madej said at a news conference in Walbrzych, according to the BBC.

One of the treasure hunters, Piotr Koper, insists that “there is a tunnel and there is a train” and that the results are skewed because of different technology used, the Telegraph reports.

Hunting for the Nazi ghost train

In late August, two amateur treasure hunters said they found “irrefutable proof” of a World War II-era Nazi ghost train in southwestern Poland alongside a railway that stretches between the towns Wroclaw and Walbrzych.

Amid claims that the train’s existence was a hoax, the two men who said they found the train in Poland identified themselves last week as Andreas Richter and Piotr Koper on TVP.INFO, the Associated Press reports.

“As the finders of a World War II armored train, we, Andreas Richter and Piotr Koper, declare that we have legally informed state authorities about the find and have precisely indicated the location in the presence of Walbrzych authorities and the police,” Koper said in a prepared statement, according to the Associated Press.

“We have irrefutable proof of its existence,” he added.

According to Koper, he and Richter found the train by using their “own resources, eyewitness testimony, and our own equipment and skills,” the AP notes.

Along with their statement, the men released an image taken with ground-penetrating radar that purportedly showed the armored Nazi train.

Six days later, on September 1o, a second radar image purportedly showing the rumored World War II-era Nazi ghost train was published by the Polish newspaper Gazeta Wroclawska.

The ground-penetrating image appears to show a row of tanks, which supports initial reports that the train was of “military nature.”

In early September, the Polish military began began clearing trees and shrubs alongside the rumored Nazi ghost train site.

“Our goal is to check whether there’s any hazardous material at the site,” Colonel Artur Talik, who is leading the search using ground-penetrating radar, reportedly told Agence France Presse.

Polish Defense Minister Tomasz Siemoniak said military chemical-weapons experts inspected the site because of suspicions the train was rigged with explosives.

A Nazi gold stockpile in Merkers, Germany |U.S. Army

Local folklore

According to a local myth, the German train is believed to have vanished in 1945 with stolen gold, gems, and weapons while fleeing the Russians.

The only living source of the train legend, retired miner Tadeusz Slowikowski, confirmed to the Associated Press that Koper and Richter shared their findings with him before alerting authorities.

Slowikowski, who searched for the train in 2001, believes it is near the 65th kilometer of railway tracks from Wroclaw to Walbrzych.

According to the Telegraph, Koper, one of the treasure hunters, said the only way find out once and for all if there is a train — is to dig.

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Russia has released the first official footage of its new 5th-generation fighter

In honor of Russian Aerospace Force Day, the Russian Ministry of Defense has released its first official footage of the fifth-generation stealth aircraft, the PAK FA Sukhoi T-50.


The government unveiled the montage of its prized stealth fighters launching from an aircraft carrier’s ski-jump ramp, along with several other aircraft such as the MiG-29KUB naval fighter and the Su-35S.

Although the T-50s only appear for a few brief seconds, it’s enough to make out the the two camouflage patterns of the first new fighters produced after the Cold War.

Wikimedia Commons photo by Alex Beltyukov

However, despite the fancy paint job and Russia touting the T-50, critics say its features may fall short of it achieving the prized moniker of “fifth-generation aircraft.”

For one, the evolutionary technology onboard the T-50 doesn’t make the quantum leap that other aircraft, such as China’s Chengdu J-20 or the US’s F-35 Lightning II, incorporate. Instead, it seems to have inherited the same engine from the Su-35, an aircraft that’s considered to be 4++ generation — between fourth- and fifth-generation.

Additionally, the primary trait of fifth-generation aircraft, namely stealth, is also called into question when compared with others around the world. According to RealClearDefense, in 2010 and 2011, sources close to the program claimed that the T-50’s radar cross section, the measurement of how detectable on radar an object is, was estimated to be 0.3 to 0.5 square meters.

Although these figures may sound impressive, when compared with the US Air Force F-22 Raptor’s 0.0001-square-meter RCS or the F-35’s 0.001-square-meter RCS, it’s worth taking a second look at by engineers.

Despite the controversy, the T-50 excels where other fifth-generation aircraft have not: its cost. With each unit more than $50 million, it’s considered a bargain when comparing it with the F-22’s $339 million and the F-35’s $178 million price tags.

Here’s what the T-50 looks like in action:

Watch the entire video from the Russian Ministry of Defense:

Articles

These massive balloons are key to cruise missile defense

Photo: US Army


The white craft look innocuous, like small blimps, but veterans of the war in Afghanistan may remember the difference they made in combat, allowing friendly forces to constantly see everything happening in an area.

The aerostats have traded their cameras for sophisticated radars and are now part of a cruise missile shield for America’s capital.

Cruise missiles can be armed with either conventional or nuclear warheads. Russia is inventing new missiles and disguising old ones, according to the Atlantic Council. One Russian missile, the Club-K, can be smuggled in civilian shipping containers.

The blimps work in pairs to defeat these threats. One collects 360 degrees of radar information at all times while the other holds a fire control radar that hones in on specific threats. Flying from 10,000 feet, they can cover an area nearly the size of Texas. The targeting information can be passed on to defending forces in the area. Adm. William Gortney, NORAD and U.S. Northern Commander, wants the aerostats’ radars to be integrated with Navy ships and Air Force fighter jets in the area.

If the upgrades are approved, ships and planes would be able to collect targeting data from the ships and launch missiles to bring down the threat immediately.

Like the video above states, the blimps don’t only watch out for cruise missiles. They can also see approaching ships and vehicles, allowing defenders to identify cruise missile launchers and other threats as well. This would allow forces to target the launchers before the missiles are in the air, a much cheaper and safer option than going after in-flight missiles.

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7 things that make you stick out in the US military

The military is one of those work environments where it’s generally best to blend in. Sure, you want to stand out during promotion boards or advancement exams, but the rest of the time it’s best for troops to keep their heads down.


Unfortunately, some people are cursed with traits that make that impossible. Here are 7 things that are guaranteed to draw extra attention.

1. Height

Photo: US Army

Too-tall or too-short, both will make someone stand out. In formation, everyone is right next to each other and outliers are super obvious. At ceremonies, many units are reorganized according to height so the unit has a more uniform appearance.

2. Being a know-it-all

Photo: US Navy Mass Communication Specialist Seaman K. Cecelia Engrums

This person wants to stand out, but they shouldn’t. Answering a direct question is no big deal, and offering an informed opinion every once in a while is great. But people who answer every question in a class don’t get the “team” idea behind the military. And the rest of the team hates them for it.

3. Coming from another country

Photo: US Navy Legalman 1st Class Jennifer L. Bailey

The U.S. military is predictably full of Americans, but some foreign people do join.

A few English or South African troops may be able to skate by under the radar, but most foreigners get found out immediately. As if it wasn’t hard enough to adjust to military culture, this recruit has to adjust to American culture at the same time. Every time they mess something up, some squad-jokester-wannabe will make a comment about how it’s because they didn’t grow up in America.

4. Being from Texas

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vyFSdj1J5Vw
It’s like being foreign. Everyone has their favorite Texas jokes, Texas nicknames, and Texas memes. Once someone is outed as being a Texan, they will get saddled with all the Lone Star military stereotypes.

5. Having an accent

Photo: US Army Staff Sgt. Shane Hamann

Yeah, soldiers who talk funny are going to get noticed. It’s funniest when they have to speak in front of the unit. They’re up there talking about how their squad helped them get promoted or earn an award and the formation just stands there smiling like they understand any of the words being said.

6. Possessing no rhythm

Photo: US Air Force Master Sgt. Cecilio Ricardo

In the civilian world, bad rhythm just makes it harder to meet people at clubs and square dances. But rhythm is key to military life. Units march in rhythm, troops exercise in rhythm, and new tasks are taught “by the numbers” where students practice things like landing in a parachute in a set rhythm.

A service member with no rhythm sticks out and gets ridiculed. In basic training, it’s even worse since it draws the eyes of the dreaded training cadre.

7. Carrying a funny or famous last name

Meme via OutOfRegs.com

As a civilian, someone’s last name isn’t all that visible. It’s in email signatures, and that’s about it. But in the military, a person’s last name is their primary name. It’s on their shirts, it’s beneath any pictures of them, and it’s on most of their hats. Some people don’t know their buddy’s first name until they friend each other on Facebook.

So, when someone’s last name is “Nye,” everyone knows. And that person can’t walk into a room without someone singing the Bill Nye theme song.

NOW: The 7 people you meet in basic training

OR: The best and worst Air Force recruiting slogans of all-time

 

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7 unrealistic Navy SEAL characters in the movies

Since the halcyon days of World War II frogmen, Navy SEALs have completed some of the most dangerous missions ever largely in the shadows — until the book comes out, that is.


When done correctly, Hollywood has produced a few films that give those brave men credit where it’s due. However, some films try to capitalize on the respected SEAL image by creating characters that are so far-fetched, many veterans call bullsh*t on it right way.

Related: This is why some sailors wear gold stripes, and some wear red

So check out our list of unrealistic Navy SEAL characters we’d love to forget.

7. Lt. Dale Hawkins

Played by Charlie Sheen, the action film “Navy SEALs” showcased Hawkins as being the “wild child” within the SEAL team. The movie decided to show his recklessness by having the character leap out of a moving car and into a river — it worked.

Seriously? (Images via Giphy)

6. Chief Casey Ryback

Steven Seagal plays Chief Casey Ryback, a decorated Navy SEAL who specializes in explosives, weapons, and counter-terrorism turned culinary specialist, spending his remaining years in the Navy as a cook.

An epic hand salute. (Source: WB/Screenshot)

5. John “Bullfrog” Burke

OJ “The Juice” Simpson, played a Navy SEAL in 1994’s TV movie “Frogmen,” but unfortunately it never saw action. The show focused on Simpson’s character “Bullfrog” who conducted secret operations out of a dive shop in Malibu.

Unfortunately, 1994 was a big year for Simpson but not in a good way.

We wouldn’t follow him into battle (Source: WB)

4. Lawrence Hammer

Rob Lowe plays a young rebel navigating through life as an elite member of the Navy SEALs as he’s sent off to fight in Desert Storm in 1992’s “The Finest Hour.”

Check out the trailer below.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DOjk0qHKTJU
(GloopTrekker, YouTube)

Also Read: 5 heroic movie acts a military officer would never do

3. Darius Stone

Talented musician Ice Cube plays Stone in “XXX: State of the Union,” where the character’s backstory just happens to include being a Navy SEAL — imagine that. Stone is released from jail and given the mission to stop a coup attempt against the President and save the day.

It looks like they mean business. (Source: Sony)

2. The whole cast of “Seal Team Eight: Behind Enemy Lines”

Starring Tom Sizemore, the mission is to locate a secret mining operation in the Congo and stop international terrorists from selling uranium.

Check out the trailer below.

(YouTube Movies, YouTube)

1. Jordan O’Neill

Demi Moore plays the motivated Navy SEAL candidate in 1997’s “G.I. Jane” directed by Ridley Scott. Although the film doesn’t show her earning her trident, the implication that she will soon enough is there.

We’re not saying women aren’t tough enough to be a Navy SEAL, it just hasn’t happened yet.

Can you think of any others? Comment below

Humor

5 veteran comedians you should look out for

Service members have some of the best humor around; it comes with the job. Our comedy is pretty freakin’ dark when comparing it to the civilian sectors.


They say laughter is the best medicine. In that case, these hilarious veteran comedians should all be damn doctors by now.

Related: 5 military movies you should look out for in 2018

Check out these five military veteran comedians you should look out for in 2018.

5. Mitch Burrow

This Marine veteran served in Operation Iraqi Freedom in 2003. Afterward, he started a career in manufacturing, but quickly realized that it sucked. He began his stand-up comedy career after driving down to the Comedy Store in La Jolla, drinking three shots of tequila and a couple of Budweisers, and getting on stage. Later, Mitch was told it went pretty well.

To follow Mitch or check out one of his shows visit his website: MitchBurrow.com.

Mitch Burrow sporting his serious face while doing his monthly workout. (Source: Mitch Burrow)

4. Thom Tran

After enlisting in the Army at 18, Thom spent most of his career as a Communications Sergeant and Civil Affairs Sergeant. Thom decided to become a comedian after sustaining an injury during combat operations.

In 2008, he moved to Los Angeles and soon created The GIs of Comedy tour — a show that travels the world performing for both military and civilian audiences.

The always-hilarious Thom Tran (Source: Thom Tran / IMDB)

3. Isaura Ramirez

After serving 13 years in the Army, this former captain deployed to Iraq for 15 months. When she returned home, Isaura enrolled herself in a comedy class as a form of expression.

Now, this funny girl performs for various venues and has been featured on her very own TED Talk.

Former Army captain and funny girl, Isaura Ramirez.

2. Rocco Stowe

This Philadelphia native joined the Marine Corps at 18, serving as an infantry rifleman (0311) with 3rd Battalion 6th Marines. After leaving the Corps in the mid-90s, Rocco moved to Los Angeles where he’s had luck landing gigs, including headlining his act at several comedy stores throughout the U.S.

This comedian and Marine veteran also serves the community as a knowledgeable yoga instructor

Also Read: 6 reasons why you need a sense of humor in the infantry

1. James P. Connolly

Before James was cracking up audiences with his flawless stand-up routine, he was giving orders while stationed at Marine Corps Base Camp Pendleton. This former captain served in both Operation Desert Shield and Storm before exiting from the Corps.

Now, he performs wherever he can find work, but you follow him on his website JamesPConnolly.com.

The evolution of James P. Connolly, from boy to man. (Banner art by Michelle Connolly Photography)

They will be here all week and don’t forget to tip your waiter.

Got any vets you think will make us laugh? Leave a comment.

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7 things we loved about ‘The Man in the High Castle’ season one

What if the Allies lost World War II and the United States was invaded by Japan on the Pacific Coast and the Nazis on the Atlantic? The Amazon Studios show “The Man in the High Castle” premiered in November 2015 to answer just that question. The second season of the show drops on Amazon on Dec. 16, 2016.


(Amazon Studios)

Related: Here’s what America would be like if the Nazis and Japanese had won WWII

The show is based on the novel of the same name, penned by sci-fi legend Philip K. Dick. “The Man in the High Castle” is in good company; Dick’s other films and short stories include “Blade Runner,” “Minority Report,” and “Total Recall.” The Amazon Studios show does not perfectly follow the book, but stands tall on its own.

If you haven’t seen the first season, be advised: there are some minor spoilers ahead.

“The Man in the High Castle” is more than just an alternative history story. The science fiction element stems from the show’ namesake. Someone known as the titular “Man in the High Castle” is looking for films that appear to depict multiple timelines, including one in which the Japanese Pacific States and the American Greater Nazi Reich never exist.

(Amazon Studios)

The films are newsreels that show U.S., British, and Soviet forces defeating the Nazis. What’s more, one even shows the destruction of Japanese cities by an American superweapon. Now the Japanese and the Nazis are in an arms race as each try to capture as many of the films as possible. Resistance fighters are also looking for the films as the rest of what used to be America struggles under the boot of occupation.

Here are a few things we loved about the first season and some things we’re looking forward to for the next.

1. Seeing Juliana’s face as she watched a film for the first time.

When Juliana first discovered the films, she watched it (over and over) in her apartment. The film showed D-Day, the Japanese Surrender, the liberation of Paris, V-J Day, and the fall of Berlin. The look on her face was everything.

(Amazon Studios)

2. Googling Canon City to see if it’s a real place (it is).

In the show, there is a sort of neutral zone between the two Axis powers, and it looks like it encompasses the Rocky Mountains. Basically an ungoverned space, it’s the place to go for anyone seeking to leave the heavy-handed brutality of the Reich or the Japanese States. Canon City is what’s left of the former United States.

Canon City (Amazon Studios)

3. Inspector Kido is quietly frightening.

The head of the Kempeitai — Japanese secret police — in San Francisco is Takeshi Kido, a no-nonsense officer with the determination of Michael Ironside’s Richter from “Total Recall” and the look of Ronald Lacy’s Sturmbannführer Toht from “Raiders of the Lost Ark.”

Can’t you see his face melting from looking at the Ark? (Amazon Studios)

4. DJ Qualls!

Everyone’s favorite movie friend is in the cast too, playing Juliana and Frank’s friend (duh), Ed McCarthy. Ed does everything he can to keep Frank out of trouble and help Juliana escape capture by the Kempeitai. Now that Inspector Kido think’s he’s the would-be assassin of the Crown Prince, what will Frank do?

Isn’t he precious? (Amazon Studios)

5. Obergruppenführer John Smith is an awesome villain.

Cold, calculating, and murderous, the great thing about Obergruppenführer Smith is that he honestly believes he’s on the right side and will do anything to further Hitler’s Reich. Plus, he throws unsuspecting people off of buildings. It will be interesting to see if there’s any weakness in his resolve now that he has to kill his son.

We also like saying the word “Obergruppenführer”. (Amazon Studios)

6. There’s a Cold War coming.

It’s 1962 and Hitler is close to death. Everyone seems to think that the fragile peace between the two Axis powers is only because Hitler is still alive. Once he dies, everyone predicts a coming war. To stave off impending conflicts, the Japanese “acquire” a superweapon from a Nazi turncoat.  Now both sides have the ability to destroy each other and the world.

Tentative peace at best. (Amazon Studios)

7. Trade Minister Tagomi tasted freedom.

Tagomi, who never seemed to be fully into the full-on oppressive occupation of America, suddenly ended up in the alternative history (that is, the real history as we know it, where America won WWII) and stepped into 1960’s San Francisco. It’s probably likely this experience significantly changed his character.

Freedom with a touch of Reagan. (Amazon Studios)