6 small changes that would have made these military movies better
We love movies! That's exactly why studios spend millions of dollars making them. As long our eyes are glued to the silver screen, they'll continue to put out blockbuster after blockbuster. Some film moments, however, don't land well with the audience.
No movie is without flaws.
Even though we watch and rewatch these films, most of us would like to see some moments altered. Here's what would've better satisfied our tastes.
*WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD*
6. Don't let the terrorist win
If you watched 2017's The Wall through to the end, you got an intense representation of what it's like during a sniper duel. But, at the end of the movie, (spoiler alert) the good guy's extraction helicopter gets shot down by the bad guy's perfectly placed round.
Don't get us wrong, we can appreciate a good plot twist, but watching a terrorist win out just isn't any fun.
Isaac (played by Aaron Taylor-Johnson) takes cover behind a brick wall as he comes up with a plan to defeat his enemy. (Image from Roadside Attractions' The Wall)
5. Don't pull on the daisy chain wires
Not only is this dangerous, but it's totally unpredictable. This tense sequence in The Hurt Locker would have been more believable had the EOD tech not pulled on all the cords for purely cinematic reasons.
Don't pull it! Damn, he totally did. (Image from Summit Entertainment's The Hurt Locker)
4. Get some freakin' haircuts
We get that troops on the ground who engage the enemy sometimes don't have time to get a haircut. We've been deployed, we know how it goes. That said, Joker and the rest of the Marines in Full Metal Jacket seemed to have haircut amenities where they were stationed before being sent into Hue.
A good military haircut goes a long way.
Joker (middle) looks depressed as he waits on the base barber to show the f*ck up. (Image from Warner Bros' Full Metal Jacket)
3. Trim down the love storyline a little and get to the action
We're looking at you, Pearl Harbor.
As much as we want to see Kate Beckinsale as often as possible, we also want some awesome explosions — and sooner. (Image from Buena Vista Pictures' Pearl Harbor)
2. Get a clean shave
Last Flag Flying puts the true meaning of military brotherhood, even years after service, on display. But let's consider getting a good, clean shave before donning a set of Marine Dress Blues for a funeral.
Let's clean it up there, staff sergeant. (Image from Amazon Studios' Last Flag Flying)
1. Save Mellish — or at least try to!
During the last firefight in Saving Private Ryan, Private Mellish engages a German in hand-to-hand combat in a small room. He yells out for help, but eventually succumbs. But, right outside the room where Mellish meets his doom sits Cpl. Timothy Upham on the staircase, crying his eyes out as his buddy is stabbed to death.
We wanted to see a little more physical effort from Upham. We're okay with Mellish dying if the plot demands it, but holy sh*t, we can't bare to watch Cpl. Upham idly cry.
Cpl. Upham, you disappoint us. (Image from DreamWorks Pictures' Saving Private Ryan)