Finland beat the Russians so hard we're still cheering for them 80 years later

Russia is usually (for good reason) portrayed as the bad guy here in the West, which is not a surprise to anyone watching Russia flounder in Ukraine. Ukraine: absolute legends for reversing Russian gains multiple times, isolating Crimea, and crippling Russian oil exports in 2026 alone.

But back in the days of the Soviet Union, Finland did something similarly impressive: After it beat Stalin’s armies so badly, for so long, Nazi Germany was actually convinced to move up its plan to conquer the USSR. It convinced Hitler, Stalin’s then-ally of convenience, that “You only have to kick in the door and the whole rotten structure will come crashing down.”

Also Read: A Russian game studio is making a ‘propaganda’ game about its worst modern failure

The Soviet Union would ultimately become an Allied power in World War II, but that was only after it helped Nazi Germany conquer Poland and invaded Finland. For its part, Finland’s surprising performance in the Winter War of 1939-1940 was such a big deal that the world took notice.

So how’d it happen?

Russians launch the Winter War 1939-1940

Finns Winter War — A Finnish anti-aircraft crew inspects the wreckage of a twin-engine Soviet bomber in Finland during the Winter War. (Hulton-Deutsch Collection/Corbis via Getty Images)

When the Winter War between Finland and the Soviet Union kicked off in 1939, Hitler and Stalin enjoyed a nonaggression pact, Finland was isolated politically and geo graphically, and the world was hoping to avert a global catastrophe. A sober gambler had every reason to bet on the Soviet Union.

The Soviets initially asked Finland for permission to build a bangin’ naval base on the Hanko Peninsula in exchange for some large tracts of land on the Finnish-Russian border. When Finland said no, calling the deal, “two pounds of dirt for one pound of gold,” the Soviets decided to take it by force.

The Red Army started the war with a false-flag operation, shelling their own border positions. Later that week, the Soviets invaded with 450,000 troops, 4,000 planes, and 6,000 armored vehicles, all in the month of November.

But the Finns knew the land and picked a perfect spot north of St. Petersburg to resist the invasion. The toughest of the active fighting took place along the Mannerheim Line, strung between the Gulf of Finland and Lake Ladoga, named the line for Finland’s commander-in-chief Field Marshal Baron Carl Gustav Emil Mannerheim.

The Soviets were stopped (cold) by 180,000 Finnish troops with fewer than 200 vehicles of all types.

Soviet mistakes in the Winter War

White Death sniper — Finnish marksman Simo Häyhä became one of the most acclaimed snipers ever during the Winter War.

Arguably the most famous of Finland’s defenders was a sniper who ate snow to eliminate the fog of his breath and wore a white mask, Simo Häyhä. Amazingly, even though the Russians were fighting a war of choice in winter, the Soviets sent very little in the way of winter supplies, including neither coats nor proper lubricants.

Since the Soviets invaded a snowy country during the winter in dark uniforms, Finnish snipers (like Häyhä) and machine gunners had a field day wiping them out.

The Soviet Union lied about bombing Finland when it started the invasion, with Soviet Foreign Minister Vyacheslav Molotov claiming it was dropping humanitarian supplies and food. It was an ironic claim, since the Soviets didn’t even bring enough food for themselves. Finns soon jokingly referred to Russian cluster munitions as “Molotov bread baskets.”

But no one was laughing in the Red Army. Russian tanks frequently froze up entirely. The Finns developed special tactics for taking out trapped armor and Russian infantry, simply skiing up and attacking them when they inevitably got stuck in the ice and snow.

The Finnish Defense

Several glass bottles covered in frost and snow are lined up outdoors in a cold, snowy environment. The bottles vary in color and label design, with some having caps wrapped in snow or ice. The background is blurred, emphasizing the frozen bottles in the foreground. — An array of Molotov Cocktails used in a protest during 2013. Image courtesy Wikimedia Commons.

The Finns made a special gift for the Soviets, returning Molotov’s bread baskets with an invention of their own: the Molotov cocktail. They filled glass bottles with gasoline or alcohol, stuffed a burning rag into it, and threw the bottles at an opening on Russian tanks that led down into the engine compartment. It was a shockingly effective tactic.

The tanks often exploded, which is rare in real life, or burned down to the treads. Fun (for the Finns) either way. Finland mostly fought along the Mannerheim Line, but a few months into the war, the Soviets finally achieved breakthroughs. Finland would have to take a negotiated settlement rather than risk letting pissed-off Soviets run roughshod over their peninsula.

Despite the forced peace, Finland’s showing was a pretty great success for a small nation facing a massive military enemy. The strangest result of the Winter War, of course, would be awkward for everyone later, during World War II.

Finland would have been a great member of the Allies, but its war wasn’t really the world war everyone else was fighting: what Finland really wanted was the chance to get back at the Soviet Union, and it didn’t mind who it had to team up with to do it. So when the Germany invaded Russia in 1941, Finland lined up with the Nazis and the Soviet Union came over to the Allies.

While we appreciate T-34 tanks and everything, I, for one, would typically rather square up next to Finland than the Russians. But you can’t really do that if your potential ally becomes a literal Nazi.

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