6 ways military life would be easier if it were like a video game

Eric Milzarski
Jun 27, 2018 6:05 AM PDT
1 minute read
Gaming photo

SUMMARY

Young civilians often tend to equate life in the military with what they see in video games. By their very nature, video games are supposed to be fun and engaging. You often find yourself in the boots of an impossibly badass character, doing over th…

Young civilians often tend to equate life in the military with what they see in video games. By their very nature, video games are supposed to be fun and engaging. You often find yourself in the boots of an impossibly badass character, doing over the top things.


By contrast, life in the military usually involves sitting around, waiting to hear what the next training exercise will be. It's definitely not the video-game-like experience some might expect.

We can't blame you for using your imagination, though. In fact, these are some things about video games that would make real military service so much better.

6. The tutorial would be much shorter

At the beginning of nearly every game, you're first taught how to play the game. Use the sticks to move around, press 'X' to jump, press 'R2' to shoot, and so on. In the real world, you spend 9 weeks in basic/boot camp, additional time learning your specific MOS, and then god-knows-how-much time before you actually deploy.

Your Colonel would never get on the radio to teach you how to climb a ladder... (Screenshot from Konami's Metal Gear Solid)

5. Traveling would just be a load screen

One of the worst waits in the military is the moment you pack your duffle bag for the last time to leave the deployment. You wait to get the order to move to the larger FOBs, you wait to get the order to leave country to a larger airfield, and then you wait for the plane to finally touch down. At least in a video game, the load screens don't last three weeks.

Every troop while they "hurry up and wait." (Image via GIPHY)

4. Having a choice in gear would be nice

The most common talking point between someone who plays military video games and someone who actually knows the military is weapon selection. You'll hear the, "Oh, did you get to use the (insert weapon issued by another country's SpecOps)?"

Almost always, you're assigned a weapon by your squad leader. One person is the grenadier, another the machine gunner. Everyone else is a rifleman. Rarely will you even interact with someone who has a sniper rifle, let alone use one.

If you're wondering who gets the machine gun, it's always the smallest person — because it's funny. (Image via GIPHY)

3. Combat would be easy if the enemy was flagged for PvP

In massively multiplayer games, like World of Warcraft, you get to have fun duking it out with others in player-versus-player combat. For the most part, you're always going to know who, exactly, is your enemy. Iraq and Afghanistan, on the other hand...

Also, looting stuff from the enemy is also generally frowned upon. (Image via GIPHY)

2. No need for medics!

Who needs an entire expertise that takes years of training when you can just step on top of a first aid kit or hide behind a rock until your screen stops glowing red?

You could get shot thirty times and get right back up to chainsaw someone in half a few seconds later.

Much simpler than changing your socks and taking a Motrin. (Image via GIPHY)

1. Changes from the developers usually make things easier

There's no real rank structure in video games. Sure, you might have a guild leader or your e-sports team might have a captain, but the only words that come down the pipe to a gamer, generally, are patch notes. Games get patched to fix bugs, make the game more accessible, and usually have a positive impact on the overall game.

If you get word from the Big Military on something, it's usually something dumb, like a change in the tattoo policy or a memo stating the uniforms you just bought are now obsolete.

If you think hearing your character got nerfed was bad, try hearing your deployment got extended. (Image via GIPHY)

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