9 inauguration memes you need in your life - We Are The Mighty
MIGHTY MEMES

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Last week the United States swore its 46th president into office. Even during a pandemic, a big deal was made by event planners, celebrating a new accomplishment by our latest Commander in Chief. No matter how you feel about current events, there’s no denying that some pretty awesome memes came into existence from the inauguration itself. Yes, highlighting this time-honored tradition came with the introduction of new memes. Because, well, because it’s 2021 and the internet exists, and how else do we celebrate any next big thing? 

Take a look at our favorite memes from this momentous day and the best jokes that were brought into existence. 

Bernie stole the inauguration show

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

There’s no denying that this is probably everyone’s new favorite meme. And that it’s already been made into countless memes. Keep ‘em coming! 

Bernie explaining himself, while also not caring that he’s an infamous inauguration meme now

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Dude was just trying to stay warm! 

When the pose fits, wear it. 

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

#gangnumstyle 

They just kept on coming

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

And we were HERE for it. 

Lady Gaga’s outfit, which was fire but also quite Hunger Games-y

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

We like your inspo though.

We also like these inauguration outfit recreations.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Even if the meme made us LOL.

Kanye already interrupted one big show. Why not an inauguration?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Classic Kanye.

That time Leslie Knope predicted Joe’s future inauguration

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Homegirl met Joe Biden back in the day. 

This TikTok star who documented his journey, avec cranberry jug chugging

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Newly famed Nathan Apodaca skateboarded his way to the inauguration, drinking cranberry juice. As one does.  

This random, yet hilarious shot 

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

If you know, you know. 

The laughs just kept coming from this year’s inauguration event. Especially the never-ending line up of Bernie and his mittens. (BTW mitten sales have apparently skyrocketed in days since. If you’re in the mitten business, you can thank the man himself!) 

What were your favorite memes from the inauguration?

MIGHTY MEMES

The 13 funniest military memes for the week of May 11

Oh snap! The first official recruiting ad for the Space Force has finally dropped! Don’t get me wrong. I’m just as hyped as everyone else who joked to their retention NCO that the only way they’d stay in was to reclass as a space shuttle door gunner.

But, like, why do they even need an advertisement at this point? Everyone knows who they are and are already planning on camping out at the recruitment offices when they open. It’s like seeing a commercial for a Ferrari. It’s just a waste of time and money when we’re already sold on the idea.

Whatever. They’re probably going to have a bigger budget than the Air Force – so spend it if you got it, right? Anyway, here are some memes.


1. I don’t care about any of your damn stories from Basic. But you can be damn sure that I’ll play along with whatever BS lie about how badass you are to tell civilians.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

2. While we’re in, we all sh*ttalk chief for being OFP. But, he’s literally treating the military like it’s a 9-5 job at that point.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

3. North Korean generals got nothing on some of the E-4’s I’ve seen these days…

No photo description available.

4. Anyone know if the vehicles in the motorpool are still fine? No one’s been around to kick their tires in ages!

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

5. All else fails, pocket sand…

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

6. One makes things go boom. The other prevents things from going boom. See the problem?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

7. Largest amphibious landing in military history and it wasn’t conducted by the branch of the military specifically designed for such a task…

(Yeah, I know. They were in the Pacific and Marine generals assisted in the planning. I thought Marines were at least supposed to understand jokes.)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

8. “Ah, I see you’re a man of culture as well.”

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

9. For the Space Force? In a heartbeat. Then again, I’ve been out for a few years, put on a few pounds, have literally no applicable skills needed in space… But I’d do it.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

10. Well. Now I’m going to rewatch Band of Brothers this quarantine… for the 101st time…

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

11. As long as you don’t have flat feet. (Is flat feet still a thing?)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

12. f it looks right, it is right.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

13. If you didn’t jump up out of your bunk, but forgot that you’re on the lower one, so you smack your head so damn hard it echoes through the bay, did you even go to basic/boot camp?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

MIGHTY MEMES

These 20 clever Coast Guard memes will float your boat

Aside from the Air Force, the Coast Guard might be the most underrated military branch there is. Somehow, they manage to block out the haters and keep on laughing– mostly at themselves.  From protecting our waters to commandeering drug smuggling turtles, enjoy these hilarious Coast Guard memes about the guardians of our shores.

1. Watching the coast…closely.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Expect the unexpected. When the coast starts acting up, you’ll be ready.

2. Life isn’t fair

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

It’s not a competition. It’s not a competition.

3. Whoever said Coast Guard guys are cute…

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Was 100% right. Where do I sign up?

4. If you like it then you should’ve put on a ring on it. 

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

There are worse lives to lead.

5. Combat training

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

You laugh now, but when the orcas attack, who are you gonna call?

6. On the high seas…

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Don’t enlist if you don’t like being damp. All the time.

7. Superiority complex much?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Those chicken sandwiches are hard to top.

8. Reality check

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

At least they clean up the coast?

9. We’re the oldest 

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Let’s give them this one thing. Just this one.

10. True champions are in a league of their own.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Lapdog not included.

11. We have to hand it to them

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Not gonna lie, this would definitely upgrade their image.

12. It’s not easy

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Who’s laughing now, Joe?

13. Just checking!

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Well, have you?

14. We’re there for you Navy

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Waves? What waves?

15. Before and after Pearl Harbor

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

We’ve seen some things.

16. Budget cuts be like

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Frustration is the recipe for innovation, right? Or stupidity. Not sure which.

17. Thanks, Chili’s!

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

It’s tough being a floating billboard.

18. Why…just why?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

It was such a good role, too.

19. Salvation who, now?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

They’re just trying to keep you down, Louis. Don’t listen to them. 

20. Sorry man, but we had to do it…

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

*Cough*

MIGHTY MEMES

Military jargon in 10 amazing memes

If you know the language of the military, you know what we’re talking about. It’s basically a language all its own. Full of acronyms and nicknames that don’t make sense to the general public, there are entire strings of conversations that can go on including nothing but jargon. (And good luck to anyone not in the know.)  That’s where funny memes come in.

From discussing ranks, daily situations, moves to everyday gear, jargon is a THING in the military. Take a look at these common memes discussing what it’s like to speak the language … and if you don’t.

  1. When there’s just a bunch of letters
9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Not untrue. 

2. Sometimes you can’t shut it off … even when you want to

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Stop, translate, re-state.

3. The point doesn’t always get across

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

But it’s a good time. 

4. When you accidentally teach civilians

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Make it stop.

5. Seriously though

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Do you hear yourself? 

6. When you first joined and had no idea what was happening.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

The vocab keeps on coming.

7. Deciphering the code like…

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Wait, what? 

8. Then when you are lost and just stay silent.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Eventually it’ll all make sense.

9. The people who shorten everything

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

You are so cool. 

10. It never stops

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Ne-ver.

Military jargon — in all branches — is a language all on its own, and once you learn it, it sticks with you for life. After all, it’s an earned right of passage. Take it with you and use it well!

MIGHTY MEMES

Top 20 Army/Navy trash talking memes

Since the dawn of time and inception of the Armed Forces, trash talking has been an accepted right of passage for military members. As sports entered the equation, naturally the trash talking intensified. As the internet gave birth to memes, this opened so many doors to hilarity. No matter who you are cheering for during the Army/Navy football game, we here at WATM hope you’ll embrace the epic nature of our top 20 trash talking memes.

  1. USMC
9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Everyone knows the Marine Corps is the toughest, most badass branch – after all, there’s a reason they say, “Always a Marine”. Except on Army/Navy game day, then they are suddenly sailors.

2. Camouflage Burn

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Blending in with their surroundings is what the entire Army does best. Hoorah! Oh wait, that’s the Green Berets. Never mind.

3. & 4. Who scooted best?

That’s just how they roll.

5. Air Force

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Although there may be seven (we see you Space Force) branches of service, only two are known for their epic rivalry. Three don’t have their own teams, one is the stepchild everyone forgets about and the other does the fun flyovers. It is what it is.

6. Navy Seals

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

The Navy has been winning on the field for the Army/Navy Game for years. Looks like they just won Halloween too.

7. Ocean Blues

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

When the Navy recruiter tells you it’s the perfect way to see the world, but all you see is the ocean or the deck you are constantly swabbing. #NavyLife

8. Let Freedom Ring

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

The Navy may have the Seals, but the Army has the Rangers and Green Berets. Their cool-guy factor is off the charts. Well, I guess the Navy has the badass Marine Corps too – until they drop them off to handle their end of the fight.

9. Spelling Bee-not

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

When you have the lowest ASVAB score requirement of all the branches of service, you might be a soldier.

10. & 11. Losing Streak

The Navy beat Army 14 years in a row, lost one game in 2016 and then just kept on winning. On the field, at life…. just, winning.

12. War Games

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

The truth hurts, but it’s gotta be said. Who grew up wanting to play Navy? It just didn’t happen! GI Joe’s never go out of style, sort of like an MRE – something that sailors never have to worry about eating.

13. Go Coast Guard

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

I mean, you don’t see this badass Navy Seal wearing an Army uniform when he’s in need, do you? #BeatArmy

14. And, ACTION!

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

When the Navy Seals come, they run.

15. The Uber Driver

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

When your branch sails the high seas to bring the Marine Corps to fight with the Army. Oooooh, burn. #BeatNavy

16. Holding the Fort

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

When you started the whole “Armed Forces” thing and support all of the other branches, you get some bragging rights. #GoArmy

17. & 18. Flower Power, Pew Pew

One branch is breaking down doors in the name of freedom. The other is protecting its citizens from the danger of allergies. #GoArmy

19. Bunny-time

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

When you’ll wear anything before you’ll wear Army swag, like a pink bunny onesie from your grandma. #GoNavy

20. Playing Nice

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Listen, we had to end it with this one. Trash-talking is all fun and games but every single man on the field would sacrifice it all for his country. No matter who you are rooting for, just remember that after the game – we’re all on the same team.

MIGHTY CULTURE

The 13 funniest military memes for the week of April 19th

It looks like the Department of Defense is finally retiring the Cyber Awareness Challenge training. Sure, it’s outdated, uses graphics from the early 2000s, and barely scratches the surface of cybersecurity in a world where new threats emerge every other minute. But the campiness is what made it so ridiculous that it was enjoyable.

I just want to throw out there that everyone freaking hated that training when it came out. Eventually, everyone started to like it in spite of it being silly – kind of like Tommy Wiseau’s The Room. Then as soon as too many people started to actually enjoy the ridiculousness of it… They pull the plug on it.

Coincidence? I think not.


Pour one out for the dude who always believed in your cyber security abilities when you doubted yourself. Jeff, you’re never going to be forgotten. These memes are for you.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life
9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Infantry Follow Me)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Not CID)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Coast Guard Memes)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme by Yusha Thomas)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Disgruntled Vets)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Valhalla Wear)

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(Meme via Uniform Humor)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via SFC Majestic)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Army as F*ck)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Pop Smoke)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Decelerate Your Life)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme by Ranger Up)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via The Salty Soldier)

BONUS: You guys have a good, safe, and UCMJ-free four-day weekend! Happy Easter. 

In the famous words of my old First Sergeant… “Don’t do dumb shit.”

MIGHTY CULTURE

The 13 funniest military memes for the week of January 18th

It seems like everyone is doing that dumb “ten year’s difference” thing on Facebook. Personally, I think this is just depressing for the military community no matter how you slice it.

Either you’re a young troop who’s now reminded of how goofy they looked as a civilian, you’re a senior enlisted/officer who’s now reminded of how much of a dumb boot they once were, or you’re a veteran who’s being reminded of how in shape you once were ten years ago.

If you’re an older vet who’s been out for longer than ten years, well, you’re probably the same salty person in the photo, and no one could tell the difference or that you aged. Maybe a bit more gray and less hair.

Anyways. The Coast Guard hasn’t been paid, but at least these memes are free!


9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Coast Guard Memes)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Valhalla Wear)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Infantry Follow Me)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Comic by The Claw of Knowledge)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Disgruntled Vets)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Sh*t My LPO Says)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(meme via Do You Even Comm, Bro)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Army as F*ck)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via The Salty Soldier)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via History in Memes)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Decelerate Your Life)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Air Force Nation Humor)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Ranger Up)

MIGHTY CULTURE

The 13 funniest military memes for the week of April 26th

I’m calling it now. This weekend will be one of the quietest weekends in recent history. Why? It has nothing to do with 2nd MARDIV’s insane level of micromanaging and everything to do with how lower enlisted troops think.

For starters, it’s a non-pay day weekend for the second time in a row. Less shenanigans when everyone is broke as Hell. Secondly, NCOs will know exactly where everyone is located at any given moment. Friday night? They’re all out seeing Avengers Endgame. Saturday afternoon? In the barracks playing the new Mortal Kombat game. Saturday night? Probably seeing Avengers again. Sunday? Too hungover (I said quiet, not uneventful) and Sunday night will be Game of Thrones.

If you’re an NCO trying to find a good reason to cheer up your sergeant major, pointing out the lack of blotter reports on their desk will surely help.


Here’s to a quiet, entertainment filled weekend. Enjoy some memes.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Coast Guard Memes)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Not CID)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Lock Load)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Call for Fire)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Smokepit Fairytales)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme by Devil Dog Actual)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Valhalla Wear)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Private News Network)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Decelerate Your Life)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Air Force Nation Humor)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Air Force amn/nco/snco)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme by Ranger Up)

 My ass is firmly in the “why leave a perfectly good aircraft” category. 

Call me a leg, but at least we use Air Assault these days.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme by WATM)

MIGHTY MEMES

Military romance … in memes

Marriage and the military certainly have their own set of stereotypes. This is true whether you’re the one in the service, or are the spouse to a service member, active duty, Reserves or National Guard. And in most cases, what life is really like and what’s believed by the general public varies greatly. (That’s not to say they aren’t based on some specific instances, but overall, no way.) However, that doesn’t mean it’s not a good time to poke fun at these beliefs. Especially when we can do so with memes. 

Take a look at these images that shed light on some of the funniest aspects that are believed about military marriages. 

  1. This long-running stereotype
9 inauguration memes you need in your life

It’s a little bit true … and a lotta bit funny.

2. Jim!

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Gotta propose before deployment!

3. Spouses don’t come out unscathed either

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

The benefit is real, though.

4. And this terrifying image

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

No one is safe with these jokes. 

5. When those deployment orders come

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Quick, get it on paper!

6. This common saying

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

We’ve heard this one a lot. 

7. It’s not really true…

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Let it settle. 

8. When you’re serving your country and your personal life falls apart

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Good grief. 

9. Then there are the spouses who get involved

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Look out, they mad. 

10. Fitness goals

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

It’s true though. 

11. But mostly, we’re all looking at the stereotypes like: 

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

You do you.

MIGHTY CULTURE

The 13 funniest military memes for the week of February 15th

Ah, another Valentine’s Day has come and gone. By law of averages, at least a few people somewhere in the military spent a nice evening with the person they genuinely love. The rest of us are in the field, deployed, or stationed god-knows-how-far away from our beloved.

Sure, sure. Many of those in the military marry extremely young and the spouse is often quick to put eighty-seven bumper stickers on the minivan saying they have the hardest job in the military… But on Valentine’s Day, we can let them pretend being bored, worried, and lonesome during a deployment is more difficult than serving as a nuclear submarine’s engine mechanic. After all, military spouses do put up with a lot of our sh*t, so one day with an inflated ego is fine.

Anyways. Knowing the average memer is probably stuck in the barracks and taking Hooter’s up on their order of free buffalo wings for single people, here’re some memes to take your mind off the crippling loneliness. Enjoy!


9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Private News Network)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Infantry Follow Me)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

​(Meme via Decelerate Your Life)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Army as F*ck)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Comic via The Claw of Knowledge)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Broken and Unreadable)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Pop Smoke)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via The Salty Soldier)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via On the Minute Memes)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Air Force amn/nco/snco)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Sh*t My LPO Says)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Valhalla Wear)

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

(Meme via Door Kickers Inc.)

MIGHTY MEMES

11 deployment memes that will crack you the ‘F’ up

Every day, service members from all branches prepare themselves for deployment. Depending on your branch, that deployment could consist of heading out to a war zone, spending several months aboard a seafaring vessel, or sightseeing in your spare time in Charleston, S.C.


Yes, that’s right. Deploying inside the U.S. is, in fact, considered an actual deployment. But, no matter where you deploy, the experience will somehow change your life and the lives of those around you.

A military deployment has its own culture and we think it deserves to have its own collection of memes — which we’re happy to provide.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Don’t worry, this class wasn’t too important. It only covered what you’re not supposed to kill.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

When do we get to go home, again?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

We wonder how this story will play out?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Hide your wives.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

On second thought, we probably all look a little goofy getting on that government bus.

Navymemes.com

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Nope, it doesn’t. But, that’s the deployment we’d prefer to be on.

Navymemes.com

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

And there’s no signs of it slowing down.

Navymemes.com

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And if he does, you’ve probably been on watch way, way too long.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Looks like somebody is going to pull an all-nighter… again.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

It’s still kind of a big deal…

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Write that down.

MIGHTY MEMES

20 hilarious Space Force memes

The Space Force, a relatively new branch within the Air Force, has without a doubt been a controversial subject. The poor dears have also found themselves the subjects of a number of inventive and insulting memes. From space monsters to wardrobe malfunctions, here are 20 brilliant memes about the Space Force. Sorry, guys. We couldn’t resist.

1. What’ll it be?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

So close.

2. Why so serious?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

I guess after the thousandth wise crack, it gets old. You’ve got to admit- despite her annoyance, her lavender hair is fire.

3. Aiming for the stars

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

ROTC kids are usually tough. And then there’s this guy, looking like a balloon animal in a baseball cap.

4. Why does this look so familiar?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Oh. That’s why. Who okayed this?

5. Expectations vs. reality

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

It’s no different than the rest of them…

6. Nothing ever changes, does it?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Just pretend it’s Tatooine.

7. Everyone wants to join

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Don’t worry. It’s humane in real life. Promise.

8. It is the Space Force, after all.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

After we get mainstream commercial space travel, this should absolutely be the flight attendant uniform.

9. Space Force hairstyles are…innovative?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

He should sue.

10. Me and my homies

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Is this not how the Space Force spends their weekends?

11. Good thinking

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Eat all the fast food you want…

12. Protecting the galaxy

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Just wait for the aliens to come. Then you’ll see. You’ll aaall see.

13. So effective. 

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

The best disguise is in plain sight.

14. Did Michael Scott do this on purpose?

Space force memes

Either way, I’d serve next to Steve Carell any day.

15. ‘Space Isis’

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

You heard it here first, folks!

16. The nightmares no astronaut will admit to.

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

Maybe the giant space bugs are herbivores?

17. Standing guard at the StarGate

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

It’s still cool, I guess. Almost.

18. Student loan forgiveness?

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

It’s all about the hustle.

19. They won’t pay

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

The alien exchange rate is probably out of this world anyway…

20. Getting our Zenon on

9 inauguration memes you need in your life

If it’s space…we might as well go all out.

MIGHTY CULTURE

10 gift ideas for your commander for the holidays

They’re not our moms or our dads, but they are just as tired of our tomfoolery. Commanders put up with our clowning while taking the brunt of responsibility from Leadership for the squadron and let’s remember: all sh*t rolls downhill. Thanks to the Commander, probably a little less rolled down to us. This holiday season, let’s show our Commanders our appreciation for driving them to the brink of insanity on a weekly, if not hourly, basis.

Ibuprofen: for the headaches.

Antacid: for the heartburn.

Ice Cream GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

Ear Plugs: for when they have to sit through yet another meeting about the length of your sideburns. You could also swipe some of these guys from the front desk on your way out to the flightline.

Scotch: single malt is best, though more economical alternatives will also do the trick in case SNACKO funds are running low. Pay your SNACKO bills people. Commander deserves the good stuff.

Spoofer Email Address: to deflect orders from higher ups to requisition volunteers for Wing-wide mandatory fun. Can’t reply to an email you never get.

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GPS Tile: to track that one guy in your squadron who can’t make it back in time before curfew. Which was created because of him in the first place after a night in Songan… or Iwakuni…or Sigonella…or Phuket…or Dubai…or Yuma… or….

Backpack leash: for TDYs. You know who you are.

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A Giant A** Umbrella: We all have our commanders to thank for the protection they provide from the ongoing storm of sh*t that rains down from the Good Idea Fairies known as Leadership.

A Giant A** Butterfly Net: Alternatively, to keep the hare-brained shenanigan butterflies from fluttering around the squadron up to Leadership.

Flowers: for their spouses. No doubt the hours they’ve spent worrying about us have taken their attention away from their family. Their real kids probably did not drink a bottle of Fireball and then get handcuffed on the curb for peeing in the bushes near a Saddle Ranch, and yet the Commander has to answer that call at 2am. We’re sorry. And it wasn’t our fault. It was only a security guard anyway, not the real police.

A Laser Pointer – because herding cats is hard and they deserve to have their fun.

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