In 2008, HBO released Generation Kill, a highly popular military mini-series that chronicled the experiences of the Marines from 1st Reconnaissance Battalion as they led the way on the initial push into Baghdad.
The entertaining series made veteran audiences freakin’ proud that Hollywood finally got something right.
Well, we used our (fictional) WATM private investigators to locate the grunts of 1st Recon silver screen whereabouts, and here’s what they found.
FYI: Don’t take this literally.
After he returned home from Iraq, this outstanding recon Marine decided that a life aboard a massive battleship was the right life for him. He was commissioned as a Naval officer and assigned to USS Sampson.
Unfortunately, aliens showed up, and the former squad leader ended up getting killed-in-action — or so we thought. It turns out, something happened to his genetics, and he was turned into a freakin’ vampire.
No one saw that coming.
After this badass and buffed out sergeant left the Marines, he became a famous figure in the military community and a good friend to WATM.
He managed to even star in his own show about how to survive after an apocalypse in Apocalypse Man.
This rocksteady Marine apparently met up with Sgt. Colbert after he got out of the Corps because he too was turned into a vampire after getting a bad haircut at the base PX.
The private investigators think Sgt. Colbert turned him, but we can’t be for sure.
(Source: Screenshot from Twilight — Summit)
But his story exciting post-military life doesn’t end there. After fighting it out with some buff werewolves, he developed a split personality and thought he was greek god Poseidon.
(Source: Screenshot from Immortals — Relativity)
Our private detectives tried to detain him for additional questioning, but he gained a Hercules amount of strength — and beat the sh*t out of them.