Here's who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry - We Are The Mighty
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Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

The United States Marine Corps: 241 years of butt-kicking and tradition.


Russian Naval Infantry: A Russian military force with 311 years of victory — and defeat.

Which is the deadlier unit in a matchup of the U.S. versus Russia when it comes to naval infantry?

In a major crisis, the U.S. would likely send a Marine Expeditionary Brigade. Perhaps the most notable example was its use in 1990 after the Iraqi invasion of Kuwait.

Using a force of five pre-positioned vessels, the U.S. delivered the gear and supplies needed for the 4th MEB to operate for 30 days as additional heavy forces arrived. It wasn’t anyone’s idea of a slouch: It brought a reinforced regiment of Marines (three battalions of Marine infantry, a battalion of artillery, and companies of AAV-7A1 Amphibious Assault Vehicles, Light Armored Vehicles, and tanks) for ground combat, and also featured three squadrons of AV-8B+ Harriers, two squadrons of F/A-18C Hornets, a squadron of EA-6B Prowlers, and seven squadrons of helicopters.

A Russian Naval Infantry Brigade is also quite powerful. For the sake of this discussion, let’s look at the forces of Red Banner Northern Fleet, centered on the 61st Kirkinesskaya Red Banner Marine Brigade.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
030612-N-3725V-001Ustka, Poland (Jun. 12, 2003) — A Russian Naval Infantryman provides cover for his counterparts from Denmark, Lithuania, Poland and United States during an exercise at Ustka, Poland as part of Baltic Operations (BALTOPS) 2003. (U.S. Navy photo by Photographer’s Mate 1st Class Chadwick Vann)

The Red Banner Northern Fleet’s naval infantry force has three battalions of naval infantry, one air-assault battalion, one “reconnaissance” battalion, one “armored” battalion, two artillery battalions, and an air-defense battalion.

If things were to come to blows in Norway during the Cold War (or today, for that matter), these units would go head-to-head. In fact, ironically, the 4th MEB was diverted from preparations for a deployment exercise to Norway to respond to the Iraqi invasion of Kuwait. So, who would win that face-off?

With what is effectively four battalions of infantry, a reconnaissance battalion, a tank battalion, two artillery battalions, and the other attachments, the Russians have a slight numerical edge in ground firepower. The air-defense battalion can somewhat negate the air power that a Marine Expeditionary Brigade would bring to a fight.

That said, some of the equipment is older, like the PT-76 light tank and the BRDM-2 armored car. The BMP-2 is equipping some units, but many still use BTR-80 and MT-LB armored personnel carriers. Very few BMP-3 infantry fighting vehicles or T-90 main battle tanks have arrived.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
Marines with Company C, 1st Battalion, 1st Marine Regiment, fire down range during a CS gas attack during a live fire range August 18, 2016, at Bradshaw Field Training Area, Northern Territory, Australia. The range was the final training evolution of Exercise Koolendong 16, a trilateral exercise between the U.S. Marine Corps, Australian Defence Force and French Armed Forces New Caledonia. Marines held a defensive position while engaging targets and working through the CS gas, which simulated a chemical attack. (U.S. Marine Corps photo by Sgt. Sarah Anderson)

That said, the American Marines have potent firepower of their own. Perhaps the most potent ground firepower would come from the company of M1A1 Abrams tanks. Don’t be fooled by their 1980s lineage — these tanks have been heavily upgraded, and are on par with the M1A2 SEP tanks in Army service.

Marine Corps LAV-25s and LAV-ATs can also kill the armored vehicles attached to the Red Banner Northern Fleet. This does not include man-portable anti-tank missiles like the FGM-148 Javelin or the BGM-71 TOW.

What will really ruin the day for the Russian Naval Infantry is the Marine aviation. Marine aviation specifically trains to support Marines on the ground, and the close-air support — particularly from the AV-8B+ Harrier — will prove to be very decisive.

In short, the Marines might be spotting Russian Naval Infantry seven decades of tradition, but they will show the Russians why they were called “devil dogs.”

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World’s most-advanced aircraft carrier one step closer to completion

The massive USS Gerald R. Ford will head out to sea for builders’ trials next month in a critical test before the US Navy intends to commission the ship later this year, USNI News reports.


The Ford will improve on the Navy’s Nimitz-class carriers with a rearranged flight deck, improved launching and landing systems, and a nuclear power plant with outsized capabilities that can integrate future technologies such as railguns and lasers.

Also read: The F-35 may be ready for prime time

The Ford’s commissioning will bring the count of full-sized carriers to a whopping 11 for the United States — more than the rest of the world combined.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
Tugboats maneuver the US Navy aircraft carrier USS Gerald R. Ford (CVN-78) into the James River. | US Navy

The ship will sail out for a test of its most basic functions like navigation and communications, as well as a test of its nuclear-powered propulsion plant.

Its most advanced features, like its electromagnetic catapults for launching bomb- and fuel-laden jets from the deck, will not undergo testing.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
Newport News Shipbuilding floods Dry Dock 12 to float the first in class aircraft carrier, Pre-Commissioning Unit Gerald R. Ford | US Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 1st Class Joshua J. Wahl

The Ford, like almost any large first-in-class defense project, has encountered substantial setbacks and challenges as the Navy and contractors attempt to bring next-generation capabilities to the US’s aircraft carriers. Notably, the Navy has expressed doubts about the advanced arresting gear, which helps speeding planes land quickly and gently, saying it may scrap the program in favor of the older system used on Nimitz-class carriers.

But the Navy is determined to commission the Ford sometime this year, as calls for increasing the Navy’s size and strength come from the Trump administration and outside assessments.

Articles

US intel chief issues grim warning on Afghanistan

The U.S. must “do something very different” in Afghanistan, such as placing American military advisers closer to the front lines of battle, or risk squandering all that has been invested there in recent years, the head of the Pentagon’s military intelligence agency said Thursday.


The grim assessment by Marine Lt. Gen. Vincent Stewart, director of the Defense Intelligence Agency, comes as the Trump administration considers Pentagon recommendations to add more U.S. and NATO troops and to deepen support for Afghan forces. The timing of a White House decision is unclear but is not expected this week.

In testimony before the Senate Intelligence Committee, Stewart said he visited Afghanistan about six weeks ago to see for himself what others have called a stalemate with the Taliban, the insurgent group that was removed from power in 2001 by invading U.S. forces.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
U.S. troops are going to have to get closer to the fight or risk losing hard won gains, DIA chief says. (DoD photo by Cpl. Joseph Scanlan, U.S. Marine Corps/Released)

“Left unchecked, that stalemate will deteriorate in the favor of the belligerents,” Stewart said, referring to the Taliban. “So, we have to do something very different than what we have been doing in the past.” He mentioned increasing the number of U.S. and NATO advisers and possibly allowing them to advise Afghan forces who are more directly involved in the fighting. Currently the advisers work with upper-echelon Afghan units far removed from the front lines.

If such changes are not made, Stewart said, “the situation will continue to deteriorate and we’ll lose all the gains we’ve invested in over the last several years.”

Testifying alongside Stewart, the nation’s top intelligence official, Dan Coats, said the Taliban is likely to continue making battlefield gains.

“Afghanistan will almost certainly deteriorate through 2018 even with a modest increase in military assistance by the United States and its partners,” Coats said, adding, “Afghan security forces performance will probably worsen due to a combination of Taliban operations, combat casualties, desertion, poor logistics support and weak leadership.”

The Pentagon says it currently has about 8,400 troops in Afghanistan, about one-quarter of whom are special operations forces targeting extremist groups such as an Islamic State affiliate. Gen. John Nicholson, the top U.S. commander in Kabul, has said he needs about 3,000 more U.S. and NATO troops to fill a gap in training and advising roles.

More than 2,200 U.S. troops have died in Afghanistan since the U.S. invasion in October 2001.

MIGHTY TRENDING

The US’ fresh Iran sanctions aim for the Revolutionary Guards

The US has imposed new sanctions on Iran, the first since President Donald Trump’s decision to pull out of the Iran nuclear deal.

The new measures target six individuals and three companies said to be funneling millions of dollars towards an elite unite of Iran’s Islamic Revolutionary Guards Corps.


The US Treasury Department, acting jointly with the UAE, also accused Iran’s central bank of helping the IRGC access hundreds of millions in US currency which it held in foreign banks to avoid crippling sanctions.

“The Iranian regime and its central bank have abused access to entities in the UAE to acquire US dollars to fund the IRGC’s malign activities, including to fund and arm its regional proxy groups, by concealing the purpose for which the US dollars were acquired,” Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin said in a statement.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
Steven Mnuchin, United States Secretary of the Treasury

Iran’s central bank was not formally sanctioned in the action, but the Treasury has recently said it will reimpose a number of widespread sanctions aimed at crippling oil and banking sectors in the coming months.

The IRGC is a powerful arm of Iran’s armed forces, established after the Iranian Revolution in 1979. The sanctions specifically take aim at the IRGC’s Quds Forces, which operate the groups overseas operations, including in Syria. They are said to have been behind recent rocket attacks launched against Israel in the Golan heights.

The move came just says after Trump’s decision to pull the US out of the Iran nuclear deal on May 8, 2018. The agreement — signed with the United Kingdom, Russia, France, China, Germany, and the European Union — promised Iran relief from sanctions in exchange for limiting its nuclear program.

This article originally appeared on Business Insider. Follow @BusinessInsider on Twitter.

Articles

13 funniest memes for the week of Oct. 28

Halloween is coming up, so we hope everyone has a great costume lined up, unlike most years when everyone just trades uniforms with a member of a different service for the night. Soldiers going as airmen, sailors going as Marines. It’s all cutting edge stuff.


Before you head into the housing areas to beg your first sergeants for candy, check out these 13 funny military memes:

1. Wait. Do airmen get only three shots?

(via Air Force Memes Humor)

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
Didn’t everyone have to do the walk of needles?

2. Well, at least you can apply that penny to the repair bill (via Military Memes).

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
Only a couple billion more pennies to go.

3.  Back to basics, Marines (via Marine Corps Memes).

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
Grab your powder horns.

ALSO READ: That time US soldiers pretended to be vampires and ghosts to scare the hell out of the enemy

4. “Meh. This is the next watch’s problem.” (via Coast Guard Memes)

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
Better write it up in the log, though.

5. Uh, Germany did this and got to stay Airborne (via Do You Even Airborne, Bro?).

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
They did it a couple of times in one day.

6. Make your life decisions carefully, folks (via Military Memes).

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
Going to college starts to look a lot better after you’ve already enlisted.

7. When your tie-down job lasts longer than the trailer, truck, or load:

(via Team Non-Rec)

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
Good job, whoever did the loading. Driver, not so much.

8. Russia fields its new, rapidly deployable force:

(via Military Memes).

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

9. Combat rock painter:

(via The Salty Soldier)

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
There are some Army details that almost no one writes home about.

10. “A-10 a song” is the best (via Air Force Nation).

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

11. Someone doesn’t appreciate the Air Force (via Coast Guard Memes).

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
And some meme writer doesn’ love the Coast Guard much.

12. In his defense, there’s a solid chance that he’s faking it (via Military Memes).

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
I know some people who might fake it in this situation.

13. When your vehicle recovery plan leaves something to be desired:

(via Military Memes).

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
Maybe bring a wrecker with you next time.

Articles

This is the rifle Vasily Zaytsev used to wage a one-man war in ‘Enemy at the Gates’

First used by the Russians in 1891, the Mosin-Nagant was modified from a standard service weapon to a sniper rifle in the 1930s. This five-shot, bolt-action rifle was a highly effective killing tool on the battlefield because of its sturdy construction and accuracy.


The Mosin-Nagant rifle typically weighs in at 8.8 pounds and has a muzzle velocity of nearly 3,000 feet per second — but the rifle is only as good as the man or woman who pulls its trigger.

During the Battle of Stalingrad, talented Russians snipers used the Mosin-Nagant PU version to wreak plenty of havoc against their Nazi adversaries. One of those talented sharpshooters was none other than the Soviet hero himself, Vasily Zaytsev.

Related: The 6 best Hollywood sniper shots ever

Zaytsev’s remarkable story was brought to life in 2001’s feature film “Enemy at the  Gates” starring Jude Law.  As a young boy, he learned his expert marksmanship skills while hunting game and tracking wolves near his home in desolate Siberia.

In 1937, Zaytsev was recruited into the Red Army, volunteered to be transferred to the front lines and waged a one-man war against the Nazis and reportedly killed 250 enemy troops with his Mosin-Nagant.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
The Hero of the Soviet Union Vasily Zaitsev (left)

Reportedly, Zaitsev was involved in a historical sniper duel with Maj. Konig, the former head of the German Army’s sniper school. During an afternoon of stalking one another, Zaitsev scored a righteous kill shot eliminating the German sniper from the war — using his famous Mosin-Nagant.

Roughly, 17 million Mosin–Nagant were produced during War World II, and its devastating 7.62 x 54R round is still used today in several Russian-made weapons.

Also Read: These 4 guns were used to make the longest sniper kills in history

Check out Lightning War 1941’s video to see this effective sniper rifle in action for yourself.

YouTube, LightningWar1941

Articles

101-year-old British D-Day vet breaks skydiving record

A 101-year-old D-Day veteran has become the oldest person in the world to skydive.


Bryson William Verdun Hayes completed a tandem skydive from 15,000 feet (4,500 meters) with members of his extended family on Sunday at an airfield in Honiton, southwestern England.

Among those jumping were Hayes’ son, grandson, great-grandson and great-granddaughter.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
Bryson William Verdun Hayes broke the Guinness World Record for oldest skydiver by three days. (AP photo via NewsEdge)

At the age of 101 years, 38 days, Hayes broke the Guinness World Record held by Canada’s Armand Gendreau, who jumped in 2013 at 101 years, three days.

When he landed, Hayes said he was “absolutely over the moon” at the achievement. The jump raised money for the Royal British Legion, a veterans’ organization.

Hayes said he had wanted to try skydiving when he was 90, but was talked out it at the time by his late wife. He jumped for the first time last year at 100.

Hayes served in the British Army during World War II, and was awarded France’s Legion of Honor for his heroic actions.

MIGHTY TACTICAL

How to protect a ship’s crew from a weapon of mass destruction

Ships at sea have long had to contend with efforts to sink them. Traditionally, this was done by busting holes in the hull to let water in. Another way of putting a ship on the bottom of the ocean floor is to set the ship on fire (which would often cause explosions, blowing holes in the hull).

The two act in combination at times — just look at the saga of USS Liscome Bay (CVE 56) for one such case.


These days, however, threats to ships have become much more diverse and, in a sense, non-conventional. Chemical, biological, radiological, and nuclear (CBRN) weapons have emerged as threats to seafaring vessels.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

Marines train for a chemical weapons attack on civilians. While chemical weapons have often been used on land, they can also be used against ships.

(DoD photo by Senior Airman Daniel Owen, U.S. Air Force)

Nuclear weapons are obvious threats. If a ship is in very close proximity to the detonation of such a weapon, it’d quickly be reduced to radioactive dust. Further out, the blast wave and extreme heat would cause fires and do serious damage. Don’t take my word for it, check out Operation Crossroads. In a test, two nuclear blasts sank a number of retired ships, including the Japanese battleship Nagato and the aircraft carrier USS Saratoga (CV 3) that had survived many battles in World War II.

Chemical, biological, and radiological threats, though, are a bit more insidious. They don’t do direct damage to the warship, but can kill or incapacitate the crew. A warship without a crew faces some serious trouble. Thankfully, there’s a way to detect and mitigate such threats.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

The Baker shot from Operation Crossroads — with the Japanese battleship Nagato on the left.

(US Navy)

Currently, a Finnish company known as Environics is developing gear that monitors for CBRN threats. Once the alarms sound, the ship’s crew can then seal off the ship into a citadel. Afterwards, the decontamination process can begin.

While the use of chemical and biological weapons has been banned by international treaties, recent events in Syria show that, sometimes, political agreements don’t hold weight. Thankfully, systems like those from Environics will crews potentially in danger a way to protect themselves.

MIGHTY TACTICAL

Questions to ask yourself before buying a new knife

Purchasing new gear can be a daunting challenge thanks to an internet ripe with strong opinions and the tribal mentality we sometimes develop around the brands we’ve come to love. Somebody on the internet thinks you have to spend a fortune to get anything worth having, someone else thinks that guy is an idiot, and everyone thinks they know what’s best for you.


When it comes to knives, the waters get even muddier thanks to a mind-boggling variety of manufacturers, styles, purposes, and production materials. Whether you’re a budget minded-fisherman in need of a decent pocket knife or you’re the fanciest of knife snobs with very particular tastes regarding the amount of carbon in the steel of your blade, there’s a laundry list of options awash in the sea of internet retailers–begging the question, just where in the hell is a guy supposed to start?

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

The biggest difference between a knife I made and a knife I bought is knowing exactly who to be mad at if it under performs.

Over the years, my hobbies, passions and professional pursuits have helped me develop a powerful respect for good quality knives, eventually leading me to put together a workshop to start making knives of my own. But don’t let my knife-snob credentials fool you; my favorite knife is still the one that does the job without prompting an angry “how much did you spend?” phone call from my wife. That balance of function and budget has led me to develop a simple three-question system to help anyone pick the right knife for their pocket, bank account, and needs.

What do you need the knife to do?

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

A good knife serves a specific purpose, a decent knife can get you out of a jam, and a bad knife tries to do everything.

Is your knife primarily going to be for self-defense or for opening Amazon packages at the office? Do you plan to rely on it for survival or as a general utility knife? Before you even open your browser and start perusing knives, knowing what you need the knife for will go far in narrowing down your options.

Survival knives, for instance, should almost always be “full-tang” fixed blades. That means the metal of the blade extends all the way through the handle in one solid piece, offering the greatest strength you can get out of the sharpened piece of steel on your hip. If you’re looking for a bit of easily concealable utility, on the other hand, a good quality folding pocket knife would do just fine.

You’ll be tempted to look for a knife that can do it all, but beware: any tool designed to do everything tends not to do anything particularly well.

How and where do you expect to carry the knife?

Crocodile Dundee may have been happy to carry a short sword around L.A., but for most of us, the knives we carry need to fit in with our lifestyles. Corporate environments would likely frown on you walking into HR with a machete strapped to your belt, and a keychain Swiss Army Knife probably won’t cut it if you’re planning to spend a weekend in the woods with that group of angry old Vets that used to be your fire team. The frequency and way you plan to carry the blade will help inform your shopping.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

No matter what Batman says, I’ve yet to find a way to carry batarangs around inconspicuously.

If you plan to carry the knife in your pocket as a part of your EDC, consider the space in your pocket and how it’ll feel when you stand, sit, and go about your normal daily duties. If it’s heavy, bulky, or pokes at you… chances are it’ll get left on the kitchen table instead of in your pocket.

If, however, you plan to keep the blade in a day pack or your glove box, you have more options regarding size and weight. If you’ve got to cover a lot of miles on foot, every ounce counts; if you’re stowing the blade in your trunk, you can get liberal with the tonnage.

How much do you want to spend?

You may know what you want the knife to do and how you intend to carry it, but the final purchase will always be determined by budget.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

These knives range in price from under (to make) to name brand special editions that never hit the market. They’re also all just sharp pieces of metal. It helps to remember that.

If you’re an enthusiast that loves a carbon-heavy blade that’ll hold an edge you can shave with until the cows come home, you can find some knives that cost as much as the used cars high school kids take to class. If you’re an everyday Joe looking for a blade made out of 1095 stainless (and you don’t mind hitting it with a sharpener from time to time), you’ll have options in the checkout line at Walmart.

A good knife does cost more than a bad one, but don’t let that mentality guide you into the poor house. I’ve seen some pretty crappy blades go for a premium just because of the names associated with them.

Read reviews, shop around, but above all, trust your gut. A knife you like carrying will always be more useful than one you leave at home.

popular

7 former military jobs that we’d love to see come back

Throughout the U.S. military’s long and storied history, there have been many different military jobs that could only be completed by troops in specific, highly-trained roles. These military occupations and ratings were once critical to the fight until, eventually. they went the way of the dodo.

The military is an ever-changing beast. In one war, sending cavalrymen on horses was essential to mission success — in the next, they were useless. Once, there was a need for the Navy to have its very own rating of sailors who’d paint the sides of ships — until they figured out that all the lower enlisted could do it.

While no one is hounding for the return of horrible military jobs, like loblolly boy (an unfortunate soul who’s entire purpose was to dispose of amputated limbs) or pigeon trainer, bringing back these roles would definitely make life better.


Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

That roar? It’s the sound of freedom.

(US Army)

Motorcycle riders

Nothing screams Americana like a badass riding on a Harley on the way to go f*ck some sh*t up. In WWI, these troops were seen as the evolution of horseback cavalry, able to effectively maneuver through battlefields. They served as both scouts and deliverymen.

Motorcycle riders could easily fit into the current cavalry — if they’re willing to give up the safety of up-armored vehicles for a boost of speed.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

They’re one part door gunner, one part scout, and all parts badass.

(US Army)

Aeroscout observers

Aeroscouts did exactly what their name implies: They scouted from up in the air. They’d ride along with helicopters and get a bird’s eye view of the battlefield or enemy movements and relay it back to headquarters.

The only modern equivalent to this would be a UAV operator, but not even the best technology could replace the need for a skilled eye.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

If each musician in the band can get their own identifier, why can’t cooks?

(US Army)

Doughgirls

Back in WWI, the WAC and the Red Cross had a specific military job for women who’d make sweets and deliver them to the troops. Apparently, the sweets they made were so good that doughnuts became an American breakfast staple as a result. But they weren’t just limited to just doughnuts. They made cakes, candies, and all sorts of desserts as well.

A return of the “doughgirls” isn’t that much of a stretch. Nearly every occupation in the military is broken down by specialization and areas of expertise with an exception for cooks. Cooks, in general, know who within their ranks is best at certain tasks better. One cook might be known for serving up gourmet, single-dish items while another is lauded for their ability to feed mass amounts of troops at once — or, in this case, making desserts that boost troop morale. Why not officially specialize and let a cook play to their strengths?

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

What other MOS can claim as many celebrities as cartoonists?

(US Army)

Cartoonists

Within the public affairs corps was the once-coveted position of cartoonist. They’d work with the various news outlets within the military and draw comic strips. Many pop-culture icons that served in the military, including Theodor Seuss Geisel (aka Dr. Seuss), Bill Mauldin of Willie and Joe fame, Shel Silverstein, and Stan Lee, cut their teeth on drawing cartoons for their fellow troops.

Comics as an art form are still beloved by troops today. Troops can’t get enough of Terminal Lance, even if they’re not in the Marines. If the military gave that creative outlet back to troops, many more stories could be told through a medium that troops adore, taking minds off the stresses of war.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

How recently did Army barbers get the can? Well, Bill from 1997’s ‘King of the Hill’ was one.

(20th Century Fox)

Barbers

Many branches used to have their very own barber that would be embedded within the unit. They kept everyone up to standards and troops didn’t have to pay a dime. As with most service-industry military jobs, civilian contractors eventually took over.

Not to discredit the fine men and women currently serving their country as tailors and laundry specialists, but troops need haircuts every week. Because troops don’t exactly make a fortune, they pinch pennies. When they pinch pennies in selecting a barber, the results are sometimes tragic.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

The schoolmaster is the dude with the violin because of course he is.

(US Navy)

Schoolmasters

Over a century ago, the Navy would take anyone willing to be on a ship. Whether they were smart (or even literate) wasn’t a factor. Schoolmasters had the duty of teaching adults what they would have learned in grade school, giving them a leg up on civilian peers who never had an education.

Let’s be real for a second. There are a lot of troops in the military who have a high school diploma or a GED that, despite the official paperwork, we all know are idiots. Having schoolmasters in service again would mean that command could refer these troops to night classes so they don’t get laughed at any time they need to read something out loud.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

Hopefully, one of these will become a space shuttle door gunner and live out all of our wildest dreams.

Astronauts

As much as we all go to bed dreaming about being the first in line at the Space Corps recruitment office, each branch has had their own astronauts for a while- possibly the coolest military job to date. For a time, Uncle Sam exclusively sent service members into orbit. Recently, however, only a handful of actual troops have gone up.

The Army currently only has three astronauts serving under official capacity — but they’re more like liaisons to NASA. When the time is right for the Space Corps, these three are more-than-likely to rise among the ranks — you know, since they’re actually astronauts and not just people who like Star Wars.

Intel

Nothing says ‘I love you’ like this grenade launcher

Milkor’s Multi-Shot Grenade Launcher (MSLG) is a revolver on steroids.


Originally introduced in 1983, this six-shooter is designed to be simple, rugged, and devastating. It uses the time-tested revolver principle to fire six rounds in less than three seconds from up to five football fields away. Each chamber can be loaded with a variety of rounds, including shrapnel, flares, smoke, non-lethal rounds, and more.

Using it easy. Simply crank and load and you’re ready to fire.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
YouTube: American Heroes Channel

Six rounds in less than three seconds.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
YouTube: Discovery

It fires flares …

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
YouTube: Discovery

… explosives …

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
YouTube: American Heroes Channel

… and even rounds with cameras.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
YouTube: Discovery

It can easily take out a small vehicle.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
YouTube: American Heroes Channel

Watch:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhLxR9u4o4E

American Heroes Channel, YouTube

MIGHTY TACTICAL

Three cheers for the Light Armored Vehicle — the Marine version of a Stryker that’s over 30 years old

The Stryker family of vehicles has helped the Army in the War on Terror in both Afghanistan and Iraq. However, for the Marine Corps, the Stryker was nothing new – heck, the Marines had a version going back to the 1980s.


It’s called the LAV, or Light Armored Vehicle, and it can be described as what would happen nine months after a Stryker and a Bradley met in a bar and hooked up, even though it entered service in 1983. That’s right – 18 years before the Army got the Stryker in service, the Marines had been using something similar.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
A LAV-25. This vehicle holds six grunts, and packs a 25mm Bushmaster cannon. (USMC photo)

Each Marine division has a battalion of LAVs, and they’re usually a mix of versions.

The LAV-25 is the most common, an 8×8 wheeled vehicle with a turret that has a M242 Bushmaster cannon. This is the same weapon that’s used on many Navy ships, and on the M2/M3 Bradley Fighting vehicles. According to MilitaryFactory.com, the LAV-25 has a crew of three and holds six infantrymen and 720 rounds of 25mm ammo.

There are other versions of the LAV, though. In essence, it is a family of vehicles, just like the Stryker. There is a mortar carrier with an 81mm mortar, known as LAV-M. The LAV-AD has a 25mm GAU-12 “Equalizer” gun (the same as on the Harrier) along with Stinger missiles. There is a recovery vehicle, known as LAV-R, a command and control vehicle known as LAV-C2, a cargo transport called LAV-L, and a LAV-MEWSS which carries out electronic warfare missions. The Marines also have a LAV-AT, which carries the same turret as the M901 Improved Tow Vehicle.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry

The LAV family has seen lots of action with the Marines, including during Operation Just Cause in Panama, Operations Desert Shield and Desert Storm, and the War on Terror. It’s also going to be around for almost two more decades. In any case, it will be hard for the Marines to top this vehicle.

You can see a video about this vehicle below.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aLpNhU1Dxmo
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No one is allowed to know your name at the CIA’s Starbucks

At the Starbucks at the Langley headquarters of the Central Intelligence Agency it might be best to just remember your drink order because the baristas won’t remember your name.


Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
They’re not known for getting names right anyway.

“They could use the alias ‘Polly-O string cheese’ for all I care,” a food services supervisor at the CIA, told the Washington Post. “But giving any name at all was making people — you know, the undercover agents — feel very uncomfortable. It just didn’t work for this location.”

The agents don’t have to leave the building to get their daily fix, but they won’t get stars to add to their gold card requirements either. Tracking the agents preferences is strictly prohibited, as the Agency fears its data could be used to out secret agents. The receipts just say “Store Number 1.”

The baristas for what is now known as the “Stealthy Starbucks” go through a rigorous background investigation, but still can’t leave the Starbucks without a handler. They are frequently briefed about security risks. During the day, the vanilla latte is the winner. For agents working long hours and night shifts, double espressos and Frappuccinos are what the agents of the world’s most secret intelligence agency need to keep going.

Here’s who would win if US Marines went up against Russian naval infantry
There might be more secretive agents. Somewhere.

“There’s caramel-macchiato guy” and “the iced white mocha woman,” one barista said. “But I have no idea what they do, I just know they need coffee. A lot of it.”

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