---
title: "8 best examples of nonsensical ‘military logic’"
date: "2020-02-05"
modified: "2020-10-22"
authors:
  - name: "Logan Nye"
    job_title: "Senior Contributor, Army Veteran"
    link: "https://www.wearethemighty.com/authors/logan-nye/"
url: "https://www.wearethemighty.com/mighty-trending/8-best-examples-of-nonsensical-military-logic/"
categories:
  - "Join the Military"
  - "Military Culture"
---

# 8 best examples of nonsensical ‘military logic’

![](<https://www.wearethemighty.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/assets.rbl.ms/17313326/origin.jpg>)

Military logic is like military intelligence; it seems like an oxymoron until you realize it just follows its own — very weird — rules.

---

But sometimes, there's just no way to read the rules that makes sense, and you're left with these eight moments:

## 1. Just going to break these new boots in before we get into contact ...

![](<https://www.wearethemighty.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/assets.rbl.ms/17313327/origin.jpg>)
*In other news, never use your fighting load carrier in a fight and avoid getting into combat in the Army combat uniform.*

## 2. In the Air Force's defense, airmen have a better history of success with planes than dates.

![](<https://www.wearethemighty.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/assets.rbl.ms/17313328/origin.jpg>)
*Don't talk to the cheerleader; save the world.*

## 3. Come on, he left the pin in it.

![](<https://www.wearethemighty.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/assets.rbl.ms/17313329/origin.jpg>)
*Alright, gonna go work on my college courses after just one more game.*

## 4. In their defense, every bag that wasn't laid out was inevitably incomplete on target.

![](<https://www.wearethemighty.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/assets.rbl.ms/17313330/origin.jpg>)
*So, this one might be on the joes, not the generals.*

## 5. What they really mean is that it's too simple to make a good evaluation bullet.

![](<https://www.wearethemighty.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/assets.rbl.ms/17313331/origin.png>)
*Better complicate it up and turn it into a mind-numbing PowerPoint deck. (via America's Sgt Maj.)*

## 6. Oh, the quaint old days when the jets cost only $70 million.

![](<https://www.wearethemighty.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/assets.rbl.ms/17313332/origin.jpg>)
*The F-35 will take aerial warfare into the future of ridiculous overmatch.*

## 7. What if a truck comes by and can't see the soldiers in their fancy camouflage?

![](<https://www.wearethemighty.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/assets.rbl.ms/17313333/origin.jpg>)
*Also, are we not going to talk about why we need to rake the dirt in the first place?*

## 8. Long drives are dangerous, that's why you should only do them in large convoys at night in tactical conditions.

![](<https://www.wearethemighty.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/assets.rbl.ms/17313334/origin.jpg>)
*Let's be honest, he's just trying to limit the first sergeant has to drive to pick up all the troops hit with DUIs.*

## Author
Logan was an Army journalist and paratrooper in the 82nd. Now, he's a freelance writer covering military history, culture, and technology. He has two upcoming podcasts and a Twitch channel focused on basic military literacy.

### Author social links  
[Twitter](<https://twitter.com/JustLoganNye>)  
[Facebook](<https://www.facebook.com/ProfHarlequin-111921498198749>)