Our trainer will make you a leopard
Google search “sneak up gif.”
Great. See you in ten hours.
Pictured above is “Creeping With Intent To Scare Someone Crapless”, a perennial favorite. Note that it isn’t actually the raptor costume that makes this effective. This can be perpetrated to equal or greater effect “eu naturale.”
And never underestimate the joys of the “Tip-Toe-Tail-Tip-Tug,” as demonstrated here. Be very, very careful who you do this to.
And here’s an example of the classic game, “Who’s Hunting Whom?” Watch closely. Which dog do you most identify with? Your answer to this question will force irrevocable conclusions to be drawn about your personality.
For instance, Max is Dog #1, the hunter of the hunter of the hunted.
Why is he Dog #1?
Because this is Max. Max doesn’t sneak. Kids sneak. Max stalks. Stalks like a fox. His prey? Other jocks. And he doesn’t wear socks. Max wears stalkings.
In this episode, Max gets down and dirty with the core-connected muscles that make it possible for you to low crawl toward your target and then lay down some suppressing fire from the prone position.
But admit it. You thought you’d sneak out today without doing PT. Well, sorry, but Max has been hunting your ass since lunch break. He’s got you in his crosshairs and there’s nowhere to run. Because he can take anything you cherished during childhood and turn it into a regimen for self-improvement (for example, rope swings).
Remember how you loved Spider-Man?
Yeah, about that:
Watch as Max ignores your pleas for mercy, in the video embedded at the top.
Watch more Max Your Body:
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Some dirtbags messed with an Iwo Jima memorial — and Marines caught 'em on film
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The US just sent nearly 1M bombs and missiles to Guam — here's why
Hint: There's this guy a few thousand miles away who's threatening to lob a nuke in their direction.
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