11 things your platoon medic would never say
Corpsmen and medics have to be the Jacks-of-all-trades when they’re out on patrol. They’re considered riflemen until one of their boys gets wounded or sick, then they have to jump into doctor mode.
As much as they love their brothers-in-arms — and will do anything for them in battle — living with your unit stateside requires a much different mentality.
For the young “Docs” who live in the barracks, their job doesn’t stop once the medical clinic — or B.A.S. — closes for the day. They are embedded with their grunts every day of the year.
Even though they’re considered “one of the guys,” there is a limit to what they’ll offer up when not deployed.
So, check out some calls you’ll probably never hear your platoon medics ever say.
1. “Everybody stop by my barracks room bright and early waking me up before morning PT if you need an I.V. to help cure your nasty weekend hangover.”
2. “Hey lance corporal, do you mind if I carry your M240? My M-4 is too light, and this is ‘arm’ day.”
3. “It’s 1700 on a Friday, but sure, come on into sick call, and we’ll take care of you even though it can wait until Monday.”
4. “I’ve got the thermometer prepped and ready. Who wants the silver bullet?”
5. “Please, let me go on this long and pointless hike instead of watching everybody from the safety vehicle.”
6. “If you don’t volunteer to spend the next few nights out in the field, I will.”
7. “It’s okay, you deserved to get promoted over me.”
8. “Doesn’t the rank of ‘seaman recruit’ have such an awesome ring to it?”
9. “Who needs a social life when you can stand duty at the BAS.”
10. “Can I please take his bleeding hemorrhoid patient over the Marine with a simple sore throat?”
11. “I’ll come in and work at the clinic, but only if it’s on a Saturday.”
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