6 things you’d never hear a Marine recruiter say

Tim Kirkpatrick
Mar 2, 2019 10:05 AM PST
1 minute read
Humor photo

SUMMARY

If you’ve ever spoken to a recruiter, you know that they tend to say impressive things to get young men and women interested in joining their branch of service. Many people call recruiters “used car salesmen,” but in all fairness, they…

If you've ever spoken to a recruiter, you know that they tend to say impressive things to get young men and women interested in joining their branch of service.


Many people call recruiters "used car salesmen," but in all fairness, they're just trying to make a living and fill their quotas.

Experienced recruiters have unique ways of conveying information to make everything sound positive and exciting — it's a gift.

Related: 6 crazy things actually found in boot camp amnesty boxes

Although they say a lot, these are six things you'll never hear a Marine recruiter say:

6. "When you get to MEPS, make sure you disclose all of your medical issues, especially if it's not already in your paperwork."

Since recruiters are in the business of making their quotas and enlisting all the people they can, the advice they give also includes finely crafted verbiage that will cover their ass should something arise during your screening.

No recruiter wants to see their next potential "poolee" disqualified for any reason.

"No, I don't have asthma." (Image via GIPHY)

5. "We get just as much funding as the Army does, so don't worry about getting issued any gear that's outdated."

You can Google the Marine Corps annual budget. Spoiler: It's nowhere near what the Army earns.

4. "If a drill instructor ever gets in your face, remind them you're a big deal and he or she shouldn't bother you again."

Good luck with all that. A recruiter isn't going to set you up for that type of failure.

Never say these words. (Image via GIPHY)

3. "If you want a real career in infantry, you should consider going to the Army instead."

Although the Army and Marine infantry are similar in various ways, the Corps prides itself on the ground pounders it produces. In fact, they'll commonly advise youngsters to pursue a job in the MOS followed by, "you can lat move later."

2. "Every movement you do in the Corps, you'll do at your once pace. Senior Marines are known for their patience."

Nope. You're at double-time, all of the time.

Forrest gets the idea. (Image via GIPHY)

Also Read: 11 things your platoon medic would never say

1. "Being deployed these days is totally safe."

You're never truly safe, only safer.

Can you think of any others? Comment below.

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