Humor

6 crazy things MPs have found during vehicle inspections

Anyone who drives up to a military base's front gates trying to gain access can expect some kind of inspection. The process can be as simple as getting your ID checked, but other times you'll be instructed to drive into the vehicle examination lane, where MPs, or military police, bust out the undercarriage mirror and drug-sniffing dogs.


Most people don't care because they have nothing to hide, but on some occasions, MPs make some interesting discoveries.

Related: 9 examples of the military's dark humor

We asked a few our of MP friends about the craziest things they've found during their vehicle inspections. Here's what they said:

6. Male-enhancement pumps

We're told this is the most embarrassing one to be caught with... Strangely, nobody ever claims ownership.

"It's not mine. Honestly!" (Image from New Line Cinema)

5. Steroids

Yup. Those are illegal no matter how much they improve your bench press. Unsurprisingly, this product is commonly found among servicemembers who carry the infantry MOS.

4. Marijuana

Even if the plant is legal in your state, it's still illegal on military bases. The amounts vary from a few grams to several ounces. Often, the substance is hidden in shoe boxes and gas tanks.

This smuggler decided to hide their stash in a shoe box. (Photo from Wikipedia Commons)

3. Inflated blow-up dolls

Nope! You're not getting a visual, but you can use your brilliant imagination... failing that, there's always Google.

2. Ninja weapons

You never know when you need to fight evil forces.

Also Read: 6 crazy things actually found in boot camp amnesty boxes

1. Urine bottles

Some servicemembers have to work as duty drivers, and they log several hours in government vehicles. They, too, are subject to inspections. If the servicemember is under time constraints and making a pit stop isn't on the schedule, an empty bottle of Gatorade works just as well.

Maybe it's Gatorade?

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