You just got your DD-214! Congrats, you made out alive. You’re officially a veteran. Now that you’re not under any specific grooming standards or have to wear the same thing every day — how will your fellow veterans know who you are? You’re in luck.
Here is a checklist of everything you’ll need to start your new life as a post-service veteran, so write this down:
1. Oakley sunglasses
Any sunglasses will do, but since this line of eyewear looks freaking tactical — you’ll continue to wear them just to prove you know how to operate.
Oakley, when you want people to know you used to be tactical AF — without telling them.
2. A “heroes bracelet” designed for veterans
What better way to remember your fallen brothers than this black or silver engraved piece of gear. They’re durable, inexpensive, and meaningful. Be ready to drop kick any civilian that tries to make fun of you for wearing a bracelet.
3. An assault pack
You know that awesome camouflage pack you didn’t get to keep when you did your final check out?
Well, guess what? You can buy it online or from the base PX (bring that new green ID) and use it to carry all your school books when you start using your G.I. Bill.
4. A veteran separation beard
Guess what? You don’t have to shave every day if you don’t want to — not anymore. So toss away that single blade razor until you f*ckin’ feel like using it. You’re a free man now.
5. A shirt from a veteran owned business
6. A ball cap with the American flag on it
Nothing says “I love America” like a tan ball cap with a curled brim.
The curled brim doubles as a great place to rest those Oakley sunglasses when the sun goes down and you don’t feel like holding them in your hands or clipping them to your shirt.
7. You still buy 550 cord — because it’s freakin’ great!
You never heard of this outstanding cord before serving — but now that you know about it, you can’t stop tying everything with it.
Just when you think the whole world has let you down, 550 cord won’t.