All too often, companies try to rate their products as “military-grade. It’s as a way of marketing it to the public by screaming, “this product is so tough, it could be used by the military!”
But, as anyone who has served more than five seconds can tell you, in reality, “military grade” is often used as a joke to describe something made by the lowest bidder.
If a truck commercial has the words “military grade” all over it, that doesn’t mean the truck is rolling onto the battlefield. It could mean simply that it uses 6000 series aluminum — the same type of aluminum used in military equipment, such as radio mounts.
This one goes out to all of the real military-grade products. The ones the military seems content to fill every supply room with.
Related: 8 genius military uses for civilian products
1. Green record books
Every NCO will have at least four of these scattered about, and yet, they’ll rarely fill out all 192 pages. Sometimes, you’ll find them with nice, elaborate covers that also hold pens and cue cards, but most are simply labeled with the date on the spine.
2. Skilcraft “U.S. Government” pens
On Amazon, you can pick up a box of 96 cheapo pens for $13.10. Or, for $9.90, you can get a box of your very own Skilcraft pens, labeled “U.S. Government.”
But seriously, these pens will work anywhere.* On anything.* Forever.* Chances are, the pen you “tactically acquired” from your battle buddy probably has more time in service than both of you.
3. Pine-Sol
No matter how many times it happens, people will always screw up and pour more than a capful of Pine-Sol into the mop bucket. When it’s used as intended, it’s kind of pleasant, actually. When it’s used by a private who was told to mop the halls, they’re sure to pour enough to trigger some sort of alarm.
4. Duct tape
Fun fact: Duct tape was created by an ordnance-factory worker and mother of two Navy sailors, Vesta Stoudt, as a sealant for ammo boxes. As it turns out, it could be used for damn near everything.
If it can’t be fixed with duct tape (and maybe with a spray of WD-40), it’s beyond repair.
5. Cotton Swabs
The unit just got back from the range, and everyone is feeling great after a solid day of shooting. The last thing to worry about is cleaning your rifle.
Thirty minutes later, every troop has a mountain-sized pile of carbon-filled, bent-up cotton swabs. Even if you use an entire box of cotton swabs, the rifle isn’t clean enough. Even after you’ve used all of the cotton swabs that supply has, the rifle isn’t clean enough. Even if you send one person to the PX to buy out their entire stock of cotton swabs, the rifle isn’t clean enough.
