Grunts, the poster boys of the Marine Corps and the Army, go to the field on a regular basis. Camouflage is not just functional, its cool. The easy way or the hard way, these warfighters learn a few tricks over time. This is what you can do to infantry-fy your camping experience in the wilderness.
- Buy a tiny chair
You can go all out on folding chairs, cup holders, pouches, and Knick knacks. If the occasion calls for comfort, then by all means go for it. However, I recommend buying a tiny, folding stool. Mobility is the key to camping like a Grunt. Sure, you could bring a comfortable folding chair to the field op on active duty, but that doesn’t mean you should. Essentially because they're cumbersome if you want to do the following tip.
2. Hike a ridiculous distance
An infantryman’s feet are his Cadillac, they will take you anywhere you need to go. Bring some hygiene gear for your feet and pick a point off the grid. National Parks are the best for this because you will have picture perfect scenery to enjoy. Teddy Roosevelt loved to just disappear into the mountains.
One time when I was in Djabouti, Africa during a M.E.U. deployment (Marine Expeditionary Unit), we got a half day of down time at the end of an extended field op. We were given a magazine of rounds, a radio, and free reign to explore or hang out. My friends and I decided to climb a mountain and we found some ancient graffiti carved onto a cliff face, a cave used by nomads, and a goat carcass we threw off the peak to see what would happen. We were 19 get off my back!
3. Identify wildlife
Grunts love wildlife. Sometimes a little too much and suddenly the platoon has a pet camel. It’s fun to figure out what something is and watch it life in it’s natural habitat. Do not go full Grunt, don’t ever go full Grunt and mess with the wildlife. Not only is it dangerous for the animal it can be potentially deadly if it’s poisonous. Gear fails in the field all the time, so, don’t expect your cellphone to work to call for help.
4. Shoot something
If it’s allowed to discharge a firearm for hunting or practice, shooting things is a great way to get the Grunt experience. That line from Apocalypse Now ‘I love the smell of napalm in the morning.’ is oddly accurate. Switch out napalm for gunpower and you’re going to have a good time. Personally, the smell went great with breakfast. It should go without saying but employ safety measures, it is a weapon after all.
5. Copious amount of cigarettes and booze
Okay, maybe not that much booze and smokes but infantry culture in the field is smoke ‘em if you got ‘em. Obviously, if there is a fire restriction do not break the law. Also, booze is sometimes allowed in the field but under very rare conditions. One time it was the captain’s birthday, and he had some beers shipped out to the troops. Two beers per Marine, hey, we wanted to have a good time not ruin our lives. It was surprise to be sure but a welcomed one.
As a civilian, the best perk is to be able to drink liberally outside your tent by a fire. So, crack a cold one for the troops the next time you’re out there camping, surrounded by nature.