8 reasons your DTS voucher was kicked back ... again

Submitting vouchers through the Defense Travel System is one of those tasks that probably originated in military purgatory. Sure, an automated, online form for documenting travel expenses and getting paid sounds like a miracle, but it’s actually like having to do your taxes a few extra times per year.

Military memes DTS travel voucher military problems

(Meme: via Air Force Memes and Humor)

Here are common reasons that DTS vouchers get kicked back, each with a quick example of what you will hear from the DTS manager for the mistake.

1. You checked a box the way your old unit wanted it.

Hundreds of Airmen train at Maintenance University

(Photo: U.S. Air National Guard Lt. Col. Dale Greer)

“This isn’t your old unit. Re-do your request. No, you can’t just edit your last voucher. I deleted it so that you would learn how to do it right.”

2. You put airfare and airfare taxes in the same box.

U.S. Air Force Senior Airman Cristina Maldonado, 18th Comptroller Squadron Defense Travel System team lead, references a portion of Defense Document 577 in DTS Oct. 25, 2016, at Kadena Air Base, Japan. The DD 577, once filled out, is routed through the unit’s supervision and allows the proper authorities to view an organization’s information and the different permissions the organization may have. (U.S. Air Force photo by Senior Airman Lynette M. Rolen/Released)

(Photo: U.S. Air Force Senior Airman Lynette M. Rolen)

“Do you think the DoD doesn’t want to save some tax money? Figure out what your airfare is without taxes, figure out what the taxes are, and separate those numbers into different line items.”

“The system might try to make you assign different legs of your trip to each dollar amount. If your flight only had one leg, that won’t work. You should’ve booked a trip with a layover.”

3. You changed an entry to how your unit-level reviewer wants it, but the next higher reviewer wants it the opposite way because screw you.

Tech. Sgt. Andria Allmond, a 111th Attack Wing photojournalist, stares in confusion at her computer screen while working in the Defense Travel System (DTS) at Horsham Air Guard Station, Aug. 8, 2016. DTS is a is the travel system that handles all military travel plans and travel pay for all temporary duty, or in some cases, home station training for members outside the commuting area. (U.S. Air National Guard photo by Master Sgt. Christopher Botzum)

(Photo: U.S. Air National Guard Master Sgt. Christopher Botzum)

“I know how Mr. X says he likes the voucher filled out. Do I look like Mr. X? Exactly. Now re-do your voucher from scratch. And staff it through Mr. X before it gets to me.”

4. You forgot to collect passport photos from the people in front of and behind you in line while traveling.

“How do we know you went on the trip if you can’t even be bothered to steal the passport photos of people near you in line? Did you really go on the trip? No, your jump manifests, training certificates, and hotel receipts don’t count. We want those passport photos.”

5. You haven’t bribed anyone yet.

Tavares, Fla. native, Spc. Emily Pelchat (right), cashier for Detachment "Blackhawks" B, 208th Financial Management Company, 10th Sustainment Brigade, 101st Airborne Division, distributes funds to Copperas Cove native Pfc. Larry Ladd at Joint Security Station War Eagle, north of Baghdad.

(Photo: Department of Defense)

“Seriously, what is wrong with you? You think we handle your DTS vouchers because we’re charitable? Or because we like collecting our salaries? No. It’s for the bribes.”

6. You failed to sacrifice at least three virgin sheep to the dark undergods of the Defense Travel Service.

Trip, a border collie, demonstrates the herding of sheep during a presentation at the Great Wright Brothers Aero Carnival on Huffman Prairie Flying Field at Wright-Patterson Air Force Base, Ohio, Sept. 10, 2016. Trip and the sheep were one of the attractions at the event, held where the Wright Brothers learned to fly, marking the role the area played in early aviation development. (U.S. Air Force photo by R.J. Oriez/Released)

“Still one sheep short there, buddy.” (Photo: U.S. Air Force R.J. Oriez)

“How am I going to go back to my bosses and tell them that I reviewed your packet without a single dead, unblemished sheep to gift to them?”

7. You have a firstborn son, but have not relinquished him to your reviewer.

military-homecoming-cut-kids-redeployment

“Oh, just because he’s fricken’ adorable you shouldn’t give him to us?” (Photo: US Army Capt. William Carraway)

“We probably won’t actually take your child, but you have to offer. It’s an ‘Abraham and God’ sort of thing.”

8. You didn’t attach the right receipts.

Tech. Sgt. Andria Allmond, a 111th Attack Wing photojournalist, poses with faux receipts for her commentary about submitting vouchers in the Defense Travel System (DTS) at Horsham Air Guard Station, Pa., Sept. 1, 2016. DTS is the travel system that handles all military travel plans and travel pay for temporary duty, or in some cases home station training, for members outside the commuting area. (U.S. Air National Guard photo by Master Sgt. Christopher Botzum)

(Photo: U.S. Air National Guard Master Sgt. Christopher Botzum)

“Seriously, this is easy stuff. Just do the paperwork and you’ll get your money.”

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