5 ways your infantry training can help get you a date

Tim Kirkpatrick
Jan 28, 2019 6:45 PM PST
1 minute read
Humor photo

SUMMARY

As another Valentine’s Day rolls around the corner, a countless number of very single infantrymen are fully stocked in the barracks of your local military base. The ground pounders are well-groomed, employed, and are trained to kill everyt…

As another Valentine's Day rolls around the corner, a countless number of very single infantrymen are fully stocked in the barracks of your local military base. The ground pounders are well-groomed, employed, and are trained to kill everything they see, even in the pitch-black of night in awful terrain.


Now, who doesn't want to date someone with those skills?

For all of our single infantrymen out there, don't worry. If you're looking for a date, we've got your six.

Related: 5 things you should know before diving into a 'contract marriage'

Check out five ways your infantry training can help you score a date.

5. Let them know about B.A.H.

Dating leads to marriage and that leads to collecting a Basic Allowance for Housing. Potential spouses love that fact that they won't ever become homeless. So, casually drop the idea of B.A.H. when the time is right.

It's true love now!

4. Choose a concealed vantage point to discreetly check them out.

You don't want to look like a complete stalker by "popping your peepers" at someone you're attracted to. That's just creepy. Choose an area from which you have to look in their direction naturally and try and get a read on their personality. That way, you can devise a "way in" and cooly approach them.

3. Show off those infantry muscles, but don't be a douche.

You spent all day lugging around that heavy machine gun, so we're sure you've built up some major muscles. Members of the opposite sex tend to like it when their potential mate looks like they can take care of themselves in sticky situations.

Wear a tight shirt, sure, but please don't flex in the middle of the bar.

2. If you've deployed a lot, use the term "cultured" to earn those digits.

Many youngsters haven't been away from home for extended periods of time. But a 21-year-old grunt probably already has one or two deployments under their belt. Remember and use the phrase, "I remember when I was in..." Simply add the country and recall that story in detail.

The more expertly you employ your bedtime voice here, the better your odds become.

But maybe you should avoid using this story...

Also Related: 9 important things you realize when dating a veteran

1. Use the space or the lack of space at the bar to your advantage.

Grunts are trained to locate, close with, and destroy the enemy by fire and maneuver. In the dating world, the idea is sort of the same — minus the "destroy the enemy by fire and maneuver" part.

Instead, locate, close with, and engage them by using confidence and your ability to maneuver on the dance floor. Girls love when a guy can dance like a motherf*cker. Trust us; we've been divorced several times.

NEWSLETTER SIGNUP

Sign up for We Are The Mighty's newsletter and receive the mighty updates!

By signing up you agree to our We Are The Mighty's Terms of Use and We Are The Mighty's Privacy Policy.

SHARE