It’s not just about the squadron plaques on your “I love me” wall or the vanity plate on your ‘Vette. Here are 17 other signs that you might be a military aviator:
1. You talk with your hands a lot.
2. Your speech is so full of acronyms and jargon that it almost qualifies as a foreign language.
3. You notice what kind of watch others are wearing.
4. You judge fellow military aviators by things like radar cross section and tail hook thickness.
5. You consider crew rest sacrosanct.
6. Your first meal of the day is lunch (as a function of the previous bullet).
7. You sneer at any mention of the movie “Top Gun,” but you’ve seen it hundreds of times and can’t look away if you happen to stumble across it on cable.
8. You’re not really all that dangerous but sometimes you act like you are. (See previous bullet.)
9. You’re most comfortable wearing Nomex and speed jeans.
No, not those speed jeans . . . these speed jeans:
10. Your grooming is always pushing military standards.
11. You say things like, “Older whiskey, younger women, and faster fighters” with a straight face.
12. You’re all about the shades.
13. You’ve taken recreation to an art form.
14. You can sleep sitting upright (even while strapped into an ejection seat).
15. The crazier a situation becomes, the more focused you get.
16. You’re only impressed by celebrities and other public figures insofar as they make enough money to buy themselves airplanes.