It's the ultimate getaway for the type of person that's either preparing for an inevitable doomsday, really into Cold War history, or is simply done with everyone's collective crap. We've got some good news for the reclusive and slightly paranoid: If you're willing to put in the time, money, and effort, you can own your very own abandoned missile silo!
Once you put in the requisite funds and elbow grease, you can gloat to the internet about how your pad is much cooler than everyone else's suburban townhouse (or that yours can survive a zombie apocalypse, whichever floats your boat).
But, as with everything else, it's much easier said than done, even if you've got an extreme amount of cash laying around. Here's what it takes.
I don't read Russian but I'm highly confident that that reads, "Free Candy, Don't mind the killer clown"
(Photo by Charlie Philips)
One of the first hurdles in getting your dream silo is finding it. The U.S. military technically had to release the exact locations of all nuclear silos in accordance to many nuclear arms treaties, but many of these silos have either been retained by the government as relics of a forgone time or have had their legal rights transferred back to the original landowners, from who they taken via eminent domain.
Since you're probably not going to easily wrest the land deed from the government, your best bet is to find a private owner and hope they're willing to sell — and that's going to be a pricey venture.
Say you found the silo and it's for sale — it's likely going for somewhere in the range of 0k and million. Thankfully, those on the higher end have already been remodeled into beautiful homes capable of withstanding a nuclear blast. Congratulations. Your wallet is lighter and the job is done.
For the rest of us who'll never see that amount of cash in one lifetime, we've got some options — but they'll take work.
Oh. And there's no natural lighting. Unless you want to just keep the "roof" open at all times.
(Photo by David Berry)
The silos that haven't been refurbished have endured years of ruin and decay since the Cold War. After nearly thirty years of disrepair, they are more than likely flooded out. Mold and pests have probably made the place inhospitable and the rust has likely semi-permanently sealed some parts off. Expect to spend lots of time bringing the place up to inhabitable standards.
The next hurdle will be rewiring the place to allow for modern electricity and plumbing. Thankfully, housing troops within the silo and launching a nuclear ICBM both required a vast electrical grid. Unfortunately, that grid is underground, so working on it may require tunneling. Additionally, being so far underground also causes plumbing issues that may require equipment outside of the typical. Again, be ready to shell out some serious cash.
Large areas of these silos were used as living spaces by troops who once worked there. These same quarters will likely become your living space. Other areas will be filled with the remnants of old missile equipment, which you'll probably want to clear out to make space for your personal stuff (unless you're got super-villain plans).
To see someone take on this journey of converting an old missile silo into an awesome home, check out the following YouTube video from Death Wears Bunny Slippers — which is a highly appropriate name, given that the name belonged to the Air Force nuclear missile combat crews.