7 reasons the Air Force hates on the Army
It's a well-known fact the Air Force literally came from the Army. From the Aeronautical Division, Signal Corps to the Air Corps, to the complete and separate U.S. Air Force, airmen have long been in the shadow of the Army soldier.
It's a tiny but non-negotiable fact.
1. Sibling rivalry
If you have a big brother or sister, you know how it is. They came first so they always get a certain amount of attention from mommy and daddy that we, the baby brother, will rarely get.
Pictured: U.S. Air Force.
In this case, mommy and daddy are the American public and big brother is the Army. America will always view the Army in the way our parents view the older sibling. And that stings.
2. How's the Army?
Every Airmen who's ever worn their uniform in public and away from a military community has heard this or been referred to as a "soldier." And it sucks. A lot. The worst part is that our uniforms have at least two things printed on them: our last name and U.S. AIR FORCE!
It could always be worse.
Now that we all have different uniforms, you'd think this would be enough to be accurately recognized…and you'd be wrong.
3. The Army gets cool stuff first
I distinctly remember being a young airman in the early aughts and stationed in the the great state of Hawaii. Until this point, I assumed that I had all the latest and greatest the DoD had to offer. This view was shattered when I went to the firing range on Schofield Barracks one beautiful day.
Fun fact: 98 percent of days at Schofield Barracks are beautiful days.
We were greeted at the gate by a handful of Army Military Police who were carrying gorgeous new rifles: the M4. I was in pure awe and full of jealousy. Was I not a part of the military police brethren simply because I wore blue and they wore green? It chafed for some three years until I would finally be assigned my own M4.
4. The Army promotes faster
I recall befriending a young soldier back in those early days in Hawaii. We arrived to the island around the same time and were both in our respective services' law enforcement components. We were decent enough pals, but this is the early 2000s we're talking about. It was much easier to lose contact with someone in those days.
In two years, he'll be your battalion commander.
A couple years passed and we both progressed. I was studying for my first crack at the Staff Sergeant promotion test. I ran into my old pal and he was WEARING Army staff sergeant. Yes, I was about to test for E-5 for the first time and he was already wearing E-6. The conversation was short and I cried a little in the car.
5. The Army gets bigger bonuses
This one really isn't too hard to explain. That same Army pal re-enlisted around the same time I did. He was able to buy a brand new Cadillac Escalade with his bonus. I could afford some clothes and few nights out.
6. Army Dress Blues > Air Force Dress Blues
This is actually quite a sore spot for most airmen. Our dress blues are little more than a blue suit with the appropriate military identifiers on them. So this one applies to every other service…we hate you guys for this.
Pictured: Coast Guard envy.
7. Army Combat Uniform vs. Airman Battle Uniform
Sticking with the uniform issue could honestly take a while. Our uniforms are all at once great and horrible. The problem here is that the ACU is actually wash and wear. You can take that uniform out of the dryer and put it on. You're out of the door in a few minutes.
"I hope you airmen ironed your wash-and-wear uniforms!"
I wouldn't dare try that with the ABU. It may be an Air Force Security Forces thing but when they introduced it as "wash and wear" I laughed...then I stopped laughing because I knew that would never apply to me.