Though only a select few civilians even know of its existence, the "woobie" is cherished by all Marine and Army infantrymen, enlisted/commissioned, from Vietnam to the present.
There are two kinds of infantry: Those who gladly pay the embarrassingly undervalued $42.95 reimbursement fee to TMO so they can keep their precious, and those who live with shame and regret for the rest of their days.
This is for the rest of you, not yet acquainted with absolute benevolence.
5. The woobie maintains perfect homeostasis
From the frigid mountains of Afghanistan to the jungles of Vietnam, the U.S. infantry fight our country's battles in the air, on land, and at sea, but not without that one piece of military-issued comfort: the woobie.
She keeps you warm when it's cold out, and cool in the hot summer — we freakin' love that.
4. It can conceal you while you sleep
Originally olive drab, the woobie has evolved into some of the best camouflage around for the infantry warrior. The woobie is currently sporting digital camouflage, appropriate to whichever branch it honorably serves.
3. It dries quickly when wet
Not everyone knows how truly miserable it is being wet for long stretches of time, but all infantrymen do. Google the term "trench foot" and you'll quickly see that there's nothing good about staying wet.
The woobie dries fast, and all infantry grunts praise her for it.
2. Don't forget, it provides shelter when there is none
No shelter? No problem. If you have two packs and two poncho liners, you're good to go. In fact, the more infantrymen, the more elaborate the structure you can construct by tieing them together. The woobie comes equipped with lashings on each corner and the sides, allowing for creative architecture.
Remember when you were a kid and blanket forts were a thing? It's the same in the military, except with full-grown men and their arsenal huddled inside.
1. Plus, it's green!
And not just the color green, though it usually is. The original woobies were fielded by special forces in 1962, and around 1963, the second generation of woobie was created utilizing WWII duck-hunter-patterned parachute fabric. The fabric entrusted with soldiers' lives was recycled, reshaped, and repurposed to continue its contributions to a more substantial demographic.
The woobie is a staple of any infantryman's loadout, and though it may follow the poncho on gear lists, the woobie follows nothing in infantrymen's hearts. Warriors unite over its capabilities, and we honor woobie for all that it does.