7 life lessons we learned from 'In The Army Now' - We Are The Mighty
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7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’

“Ace Ventura: Pet Detective,” “The Mask,” and “The Santa Clause” were just a few of the hilarious movies that rocked theaters back in 1994.


But for veterans, one comedy stands out from the rest: “In The Army Now” starring former MTV Veejay Pauly Shore. It’s not known for being the most authentic military film ever, but it’s pretty freaking funny.

Shore, who plays “Bones,” is a complete slacker/electronics salesman who gets fired from his job and joins the Army reserves with his buddy specializing in water purification.

After doing sh*t ton of push ups in boot camp for being a goofball, the Glendale reservist gets called to action as a conflict breaks out in the African nation of Chad.

Related: 5 nuggets of wisdom in ‘Three Kings’ you may have missed

Peel back the layers and check out a few life lessons from the film that may reshape how you see this cult classic.

1. How to keep your retail job when the boss wants to fire you

Step 1: Humorously tell your boss why you can’t get fired.

He’s a crazy boy. (Images via Giphy)Step 2: Have one of your closest friends page you by name over the intercom system strictly for customer service reasons.
“Bones to the service floor. Bones to the service floor.” (Images via Giphy)Step 3: Sell an expensive product right in front of your boss.
Sell that sh*t. (Images via Giphy)Just don’t get busted like our friend Bones here.
Busted. (Images via Giphy)

2. Everything sounds great in the beginning

Joining the military is a life changing event. You should take more than just a few minutes to decide on the huge commitment. Have a buddy go with you to the recruiter’s office to play devil’s advocate on your behalf.

Wait! Think this through now.  (Images via Giphy)

3. Embrace the new military you

Those who are blind heading into boot camp will be issued a pair BCGs. Let’s face it, you’re not going to get a date for Saturday night wearing them, but having a strong personality behind those thick frame glasses couldn’t hurt — you’ll stand out more.

Fashionable. (Images via Giphy)

4. Finish the fights you start

Don’t even think about dropping your guard or risk getting the sh*t kicked out of you.

He dropped his guard. (Images via Giphy)

5. Don’t piss off your fellow troops

They just may kidnap you, tie you up and put you on display.

You know that had to hurt. (Images via Giphy)

6. Mind over matter

Things always seem to appear worse than they are at times. Especially when someone thinks there’s a scorpion on their back. That’s just crazy talk.

Calm down. (Images via Giphy)There really was a scorpion on his back. Oops!
Oh, sh*t!  (Images via Giphy)

Also Read: 7 life lessons we learned from Gunny Highway in ‘Heartbreak Ridge’

7. Even the biggest slacker can become a hero

You can go from having an underappreciated job to winning a battle sooner than you think.

Bones saves the day. (Images via Giphy)What an amazing character arch.

Articles

Olav the Penguin and 5 other adorable animals outrank you, boot

The Internet is currently losing its collective cool over the King penguin promoted to brigadier general. While this is cute, it can sting for enlisted troops to learn that an animal has been promoted above them.


Well, it gets worse, guys and girls, because Brigadier Sir Olav isn’t the only adorable animal who outranks you. Olav has five American counterparts from history who held a military rank of sergeant or above:

1. Brigadier Sir Nils Olav

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Nils Olav the Penguin inspects the Kings Guard of Norway after being bestowed with a knighthood at Edinburgh Zoo in Scotland. (Photo: British Ministry of Defence Mark Owens)

Brigadier Sir Nils Olav is one of the only animal members of a military officer corps or royal nobility.The penguin resides at the zoo in Edinburgh, Scotland and serves as the mascot of the Royal Norwegian Guard. The first penguin mascot of the guard was adopted in 1972. The name “Nils Olav” and mascot duties are passed on after the death of a mascot.

The Royal Norwegian Guard comes to the zoo every year for a military ceremony, and the penguin inspects them. Before each inspection, the penguin is promoted a single rank. The current penguin is the third to hold the name and has climbed from lance corporal to brigadier general. He is expected to live another 10 years and so could become the senior-most member of the Norway military.

2. Chief Petty Officer Sinbad

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Chief Petty Officer Sinbad hunts Nazi submarines with his crew in 1944. Photo: U.S. Coast Guard)

Coast Guard Chief Petty Officer Sinbad served during World War II on a cutter that fought submarines and enemy aircraft in both the European and Pacific theaters of war.

Sinbad served 11 years of sea duty on the USCGC Campbell before retiring to Barnegat Light Station. During the war, he was known for causing a series of minor international incidents for which the Coast Guard was forced to write him up.

3. Staff Sgt. Reckless

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Reckless the horse served with distinction in the Korean War and was meritoriously promoted to sergeant for her actions in the Battle of Outpost Vega. (Photo: US Marine Corps)

Staff Sgt. Reckless the horse was known for her legitimate heroics in Korea at the Battle of Outpost Vegas where she carried over five tons of ammunition and other supplies to Marine Corps artillery positions despite fierce enemy fire that wounded her twice.

She was promoted to sergeant for her heroics there and was later promoted twice to staff sergeant, once by her colonel and once by the then-Commandant of the Marine Corps Gen. Randolph Pate.

4. Boatswain’s Mate Chief Maximilian Talisman

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Boatswain’s Mate Chief Maximilian Talisman meets his replacement after seven years of service on the USCGC Klamath. (Photo: U.S. Coast Guard)

Boatswain’s Mate Chief Maximilian Talisman was a mascot aboard the USCGC Klamath who was officially assessed numerous times and always received a 3.4 out of 4.0 or better on his service reviews. He crossed the International Date Line twice and served in the Arctic Circle and Korea, according to a Coast Guard history.

5. Sgt. Stubby

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Sgt. Stubby rocks his great coat and rifle during World War I. (Photo: Public Domain)

Stubby was a dog who joined U.S. soldiers drilling on a field in Massachusetts in 1917. He learned the unit’s drill commands and bugle calls and was adopted by the men who later smuggled him to the frontlines in France. An officer spotted Stubby overseas and was berating his handler when the dog rendered his version of a salute, placing his right paw over his right eye.

The officer relented and Stubby served in the trenches, often warning the men of incoming gas attacks and searching for wounded personnel. He was promoted to sergeant for having spotted and attacked a German spy mapping the trench systems.

He was officially recognized with a medal after World War I for his actions, including participation in 17 battles, by the commander of the American Expeditionary Force, Gen. John Pershing.

6. Chief Boatswain’s Mate Turk

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Chief Boatswain’s Mate Turk keeps watch at U.S. Coast Guard Station Elizabeth City, North Carolina. (Photo: U.S. Coast Guard)

In an undated update from the Coast Guard, Turk held the rank of chief boatswain’s mate and was still on active service. But, he joined the Coast Guard in 1996 and so has likely retired and moved on by now. Hopefully, he was rewarded well for his service at Coast Guard Station Elizabeth City, North Carolina, where he promoted life preserver use and stood watch with his fellow Coast Guardsmen.

Articles

How to spot a ‘weeaboo’ in your platoon and stop it from reproducing

Anime is a genre of animation enjoyed on a global scale. Programs like the “Dragon Ball Z” and “Pokemon” franchises have had a viral influence on American culture. Although there is nothing inherently wrong with watching cartoons as an adult, some fans take it too far. I’m not talking about those cosplayers — there is a time and place for that (conventions are such places and the appropriate time).

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Cosplay: Your experience may vary (Wikimedia Commons)

What I’m talking about is the darker side of fandom. The raging trolls with body pillows and unironically animated girlfriends. They are unofficial experts on Japanese culture yet they’re wrong about the majority of it and have never actually been there. In the military, there is a lot of hurry up and wait. Platoons are at risk of exploring too far into the anime genre out of boredom. If troops aren’t careful, weeaboos will reproduce at a staggering rate in tight quarters with no women. Anime fans are separate from weeaboos, because at least they’ve still retained their self-respect.  

Subtle signs of a weeaboo

Weeaboo: A person who retains an unhealthy obsession with Japan and Japanese culture, typically ignoring or even shunning their own racial and cultural identity. Many weeaboos talk in butchered Japanese with the 8 or so words they know (i.e. kawaii, desu, ni chan). While weeaboos claim to love and support Japanese culture, counter intuitively, they tend to stereotype Japanese culture by how it appears in their favorite anime, which can be safely assumed to be offensive to the Japanese.

Urbandictionary.com

The weeaboo prefers cold dark places where it can troll online chat rooms in peace. They will only go out into the human world for sustenance or to bully children over the rules of Pokemon cards in a hobby store. While all of their living spaces have access to water, they use it to make ramen, not shower. An organized, clear room can prevent a weeaboo from becoming comfortable and spreading their mangas all over the floors. In extreme infestations, they will have hentai (don’t google that) posters taped to their wall lockers. If one day you knock on someone’s door to remind them they have duty and they open it wearing a Sailor Moon outfit, it is time to find that troop some treatment.

Life cycle

A weeaboo has started to take over the host body of a person when they start venturing into non-mainstream anime. Like their punk rock counterparts, they like things before they were cool. Gross. Regardless, you may find yourself slipping after watching several anime on Netflix and YouTube.

When they are not on Reddit saying derogatory things about women, they can be found grazing using chops sticks on inappropriate foods. They will be self-loathing about American culture, even though we’re the greatest country on the planet. Weeaboos will have katanas and other Japanese weapons not authorized on base. Ironically, they enjoy watching animated martial arts yet they’re also the first ones to lose in MCMAP (Marine Corps Martial Arts Program) grappling matches.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
The Akihabara District of Tokyo, a Mecca of sorts to the weeaboo (Wikimedia Commons)

Reproduction

Weeaboo multiply through asexual reproduction – not by choice. Their defense mechanism of avoiding showers causes them to repel all interaction with the opposite sex. A weeaboo can sense a potential victim to introduce their favorite niche anime series by sound. Weeaboos can tell what season and episode you’re on just by the audio alone. If you watch “Death Note” or “Full Metal Alchemist” in public, be aware you are putting yourself at risk of unintentionally welcoming weeaboos to converse with you.

If you accidentally bond with a weeaboo talking about “Attack on Titan,” or worse, “Evangelion,” you may be exposed to more anime. When a weeaboo has successfully imprinted on you like a werewolf from Twilight, you will have a Crunchyroll account. Suddenly you will find yourself wearing a kimono with imported ramen noodles, complete with a body pillow that will bring shame to your family.

In lieu of attracting a real mate, they will order life-sized pillows that cannot give consent. When a weeaboo has successfully replicated itself, they will try to get others to join them, with a higher rate of success.

Prevention

Do not shun the weeaboo because it may be misinterpreted as hazing. Alternatively, shut down any attempts to watch non-mainstream anime. You may indulge in Japanese cuisine, but shut down any embarrassing anime-speak from the weeaboo. This is different than actually knowing Japanese and trying out some language.

For example, our resident weeaboo studied more Japanese when we heard we were going to deploy to Japan. He thought he was an expert on the culture and language. Yet, when our colonel announced to the battalion the Okinawans speak a different dialect than the mainland, you could practically see the anime crying on all the weeaboos faces.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Yeah, just like that (Wikimedia Commons)

The best prevention of weeaboos multiplying in your ranks is to make things unbearable for them by maintaining military discipline. Continue to keep living quarter standards in room inspections and enforce grooming standards. If you find yourself liking anime, for the love of General Mattis, don’t show up to formation out of regs dressed like a cartoon character.

Feature image: screen capture from YouTube

Articles

6 separation beards and what they say about your personality

Being clean shaven every day in the military is an absolute must — unless you’re a special forces operator and are allowed to grow out a manly beard. Every morning, men (and some women) wake up during with a 5 o’clock shadow that is required to disappear before morning muster.


But the day you signed your DD-214 and no longer fall under the rules and regulations of shaving, it’s time to grow out that impressive separation beard — just because you can.

Not every beard is right for the individual. With several types of styles to choose from, it’s necessary to grow one that fits your specific personality. Don’t worry, we’re here to help you pick one out that fits your unique look.

Also Read: The Army may allow all soldiers to sport ‘operator beards’

1. The Mountain Man

Not to be mistaken for the “Homeless Man,” this style says “I work my ass for a living, but it’s usually somewhere outside in the cold.” It’s popular for keeping your face warm and catching food crumbs.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
You may take his life, but you’ll never take his separation beard!

2.  The Chuck Norris

One of our favorites, this traditional style relays to the world that not only can you be rugged, but you take enough time to trim up. This typically looks good enough to step into the boardroom for a presentation, then head right out to the gun range.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Chuck Norris doesn’t shave — he orders his beard to stop growing.

3. The “I’m not too worried about it”

This unique look informs the world you’re just chilling, you’re in no hurry, and whatever happens, happens.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’

Related: This Air Force fighter ace was the inspiration for ‘Mustache March’

4. The Galifianakis

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’

Named after the talent actor-comedian Zack Galifianakis, this ensures your fellow man that you’re a hard worker, but you know how to crack a good joke and don’t take life too seriously.

5. The Fuzz

Not everyone can grow a full separation beard — some of us grow them in thin-to-thick patches.

This doesn’t inform the world you have low testosterone (the male’s dominant hormone) because it isn’t a facial hair growth factor — dihydrotestosterone is the chemical that promotes thick beard growth and unfortunately is linked to hair loss. Bummer!

We still respect your commitment.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
You get points for trying.

6. The Shaggy

A fashionable look for those who received their separation paperwork and ran straight to the bar, leaving their razor or clipper behind in the barracks.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’

Did we leave any out? Comment below.

MIGHTY MOVIES

3 reasons Maverick would be a badass TOPGUN instructor

“Your instructor is one of the finest fighter pilots this program has ever produced. His exploits are legendary. What he has to teach you may very well mean the difference between life and death.” These are the words used to describe Maverick in one of the trailers for the upcoming Top Gun sequel. While some people question the sense of having an O-6 who is pushing 60 years of age serve as a TOPGUN instructor, he is actually one of the best teachers that the Navy could possibly have.

1. He’s had years of experience
Top Gun Maverick: Whose funeral is it?

Who would’ve thought that we’d see Maverick wearing scrambled eggs? (Paramount Pictures)

According to the Top Gun: Maverick trailer, our favorite hotshot fighter pilot had been serving for over 30 years. While Maverick’s rebellious nature has kept from achieving a Flag Officer rank, it has also kept him in the cockpit and behind the stick longer. 

No, he wouldn’t make a good instructor at the Naval War College and he probably doesn’t have the tact (or patience) to play politics in Washington; but TOPGUN is a Fighter Weapons School. As Cmdr. Mike “Viper” Metcalf said to Maverick’s class, “We don’t make policy here gentlemen. Elected officials, civilians, do that. We are the instruments of that policy.” Who better to teach you to fly your fighter plane to the edge of the envelope than a pilot who has spent his entire career behind the controls?

2. He learned teamwork and emotional intelligence through loss and combat

Eyewitnesses Claim That Tom Cruise Healed ‘Top Gun Co-Star Val Kilmer’s Cancer With The Touch Of A Finger Film Top Gun, Top Gun Movie, I Movie, Val Kilmer, Tom Cruise, Ryan Gosling, Meghan Markle, In The Heights, Naval Aviator

People learn and mature; even Maverick (Paramount Pictures)

Yes, at the beginning of Top Gun, Maverick is arrogant, self-centered and immature. He’s cocky and overly confident, even after he’s outperformed by Iceman and lectured by Jester. However, after losing Goose during their flat spin incident, Maverick is taken down a few pegs and loses his edge. It’s worth noting that before the incident, Maverick and Goose were only two points behind Iceman and Slider in the competition for the TOPGUN trophy. Despite his performance slipping at the end of the course, Maverick still accumulates enough points to graduate with his class.

Following graduation, Maverick along with Iceman, Slider, Hollywood and Wolfman, are ordered to the USS Enterprise to fly fighter cover for an operation to rescue the intelligence-gathering vessel SS Layton. Afterman Hollywood and Wolfman are shot down by enemy MiGs, Maverick and Merlin are launched to provide backup for Iceman and Slider who are fighting for their lives against five enemy aircraft. Horrible odds for any pilot, Maverick manages to snap out of his funk and engages the enemy. Remembering Jester’s words, Maverick refuses to abandon his wingman, even when an enemy MiG gets behind him.

Emerging from the engagement victorious, Maverick and Iceman’s rivalry turns into a bond of trust, the likes of which can only be formed in the crucible of combat. “You are still dangerous,” Iceman tells Maverick. “But you can be my wingman anytime.” Following the intense aerial battle, Maverick also learns to let go of Goose’s death. He no longer feels overly responsible for his RIO and throws Goose’s dogtags off the back of the carrier; a beautifully symbolic move, but not one that Goose’s son is likely to be pleased with. Admittedly, Maverick still had some growing up to do as a junior officer.

3. He has been in a dogfight and has aerial kills to his name

Very few fighter pilots in the 21st century have scored kills in aerial combat and even fewer are Naval Aviators. The shootdown of a Syrian Su-22 by a Navy F/A-18E in 2017 was the first US air-to-air kill since an Air Force F-16 shot down a Serbian MiG-29 during the Kosovo campaign in 1999.The last Navy F-14 kill took place in 1991 when a Tomcat shot down an Iraqi Mi-8 helicopter with a Sidewinder shot.

During their engagement at the end of Top Gun, Iceman emerged from a dogfight against five MiGs with one kill under his belt; an impressive feat considering he was forced to fly defensively. Maverick, on the other hand, scored three aerial kills. Just two kills shy of becoming the Navy’s first ace since Vietnam, Maverick earned his kills in close-quarters fighting. This factor adds to the impressiveness of his victories since the F-14A was more adept at intercepting Soviet bombers at long range with its powerful radar and Phoenix missiles than it was an dogfighting.

“Though the Tomcat was technically a fighter plane, it wasn’t really designed for the visual BFM arena,” Tomcat pilot Francesco “Paco” Chierici remembered. “It had a number of elements working against it when it came to dogfighting.” Besides its large size, Paco also notes that the A-model Tomcat was underpowered for maneuvering fights. Maverick was able to score three kills in a dogfight against a numerically superior enemy that was flying a smaller and more maneuverable aircraft than his. Any fighter pilot would be lucky to learn from an aviator like him.

Tom Cruise in Top Gun: Maverick

Clearly he can still pass his flight physical (Paramount Pictures)

Despite his age, Maverick is still fit enough to fly, and fly well. After all, he’s still able to pull off his signature evasive maneuver. In the trailers, we even see him behind the controls of what appears to be some sort of high-speed experimental aircraft. Maverick returns to the skies in Top Gun: Maverick, releasing in theaters on July 2, 2021.

Watch the trailer, here:

Articles

15 things you didn’t know about 4th of July

Do you think you know everything about the 4th of July? The U.S. national holiday has a surprising, enlightening, and sometimes worrying history that you probably don’t know about. Millions are unaware of the truths behind how and why America really celebrates Independence Day. Some of those nagging questions you have at the back of your mind will be answered in this revealing fact list about Independence Day in the United States.


What is the true story behind 4th of July? Why is it celebrated and how? From the number of hot dogs consumed, to inside jokes with Nicolas Cage (he was kind of right, you guys), to historical untruths revealed for what they really are, you’re about to learn the secrets behind one of the most popular national holidays in America.

15 Things You Didn’t Know About the 4th of July

Articles

The legendary rock band KISS has surprising roots from World War II

The legendary rock band Kiss is known for their makeup, over-the-top stage show, and hits like “Rock ‘n Roll All Night” and “Detroit Rock City.”


They aren’t known as historians, although two of the band’s members — Gene Simmons and Tommy Thayer — have remarkable stories to tell about what their families went through during World War II. And equally remarkable is how these stories link the two members of Kiss to each other.

Backstage at a Kiss concert in northern Virginia in late July, lead guitarist Tommy Thayer talked about his father’s military service. James B. Thayer retired as a brigadier general in the mid-60s, but in 1945 he was an first lieutenant in charge of an anti-tank mine reconnaissance platoon that made its way across France into southern Germany. The unit saw a lot of action, including battles with Waffen SS troops – among the Third Reich’s most elite fighters – that involved bloody hand-to-hand combat.

As the platoon made its way farther south they stumbled upon the Mauthausen-Gusen concentration camp. “The SS had just fled,” Tommy Thayer said. “They left behind 15,000 Hungarian-Jewish refugees who were in bad shape.”

Ironically enough, based on time and location, among the refugees that U.S. Army Lieutenant Thayer liberated was most likely a family from Budapest that included a teenage girl who would later give birth Gene Simmons, Kiss’ outspoken bassist and co-founder.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EbocCi_OZ_U
“My mother was 14-years-old when they took her to the camps of Nazi Germany,” Simmons explained. “If it wasn’t for America, for those who served during World War Two like James Thayer, I wouldn’t be here.”

As a result of this connection, the band has thrown its clout behind the Oregon Military Museum, which will be named in honor of the now 93-year-old Brigadier General Thayer. Tommy Thayer is on the museum’s board, and the band recently played at a private residence in the greater Portland area to raise money and awareness for the effort.

“The idea that Americans enjoy the kind of life that the rest of the world is envious of is made possible – not by politicians – but by the brave men and women of our military,” Simmons said. “The least we could do is have a museum.”

“There is evil being done all over the world,” Simmons said. “And the only thing that keeps the world from falling into complete chaos is our military.”

Beyond supporting the Oregon Military Museum, in the years since 9-11, Simmons has worked as a military veteran advocate. Among some of his more high-profile efforts is the band’s hiring of veterans to work as roadies for Kiss on tour.

While other celebrity vet charities could rightly be criticized as something between Boomer guilt and vanity projects, the bass guitarist’s desire to help vets is fueled by what his mother’s side of the family went through to make it to America a generation ago.

Simmons has a few things to say about national pride, something he thinks the country has lost a measure of.

“When I first came to America as an eight-year-old boy people were quiet when the flag was raised,” Simmons said. “We all stood still.”

To Simmons’ eye that respect is lacking in too many Americans now, particularly younger Americans who are surrounded by information and media but may not appreciate the relationship between history and their daily lives.

“Just stop yakking for at least one minute,” he said. “The rest of the day is all yours to enjoy all the benefits that the American flag gives you.”

Lists

7 bunkers for riding out the nuclear apocalypse in style

The nuclear apocalypse doesn’t have to be scary. Any of these seven nuclear fallout shelters would make the end of the world relatively comfortable:


1. Cheyenne Mountain Complex

Famous from movies like Dr. Strangelove, WarGames, and Independence Day, the Cheyenne Mountain Complex is a richly appointed bunker and status symbol for the post-apocalypse elite. It feature an underground lake and small boats for re-enacting Lonely Island videos as well as great defenses and a gym.

On the downside, bunker residents would have to share space with the Air Force and NORAD whose 24-hour operations would dampen the boat party. Also, there’s no fighting in the War Room.

2. Mount Weather Emergency Operations Center

Equipped with radio and television studios so you can drop awesome mix tapes, the Mount Weather Emergency Operations Center is for the aspiring rap artist who will capture the post-apocalypse angst. An on-site water treatment plant prevents sewage build-ups and the facility houses 200 people, meaning your whole entourage could come.

Unfortunately, there are very few private rooms and those are reserved for the senior members of the executive branch and the Supreme Court Justices, so bring poncho liners to hang up for privacy in the communal areas.

3. Raven Rock Mountain Complex: Site R

Raven Rock Mountain Complex has great security provided by a company of military police officers dedicated to the complex and defenses to defeat an electromagnetic attack. It reportedly features a stocked Starbucks and a direct underground tunnel to Camp David, the President’s own retreat.

Of course, all those amenities mean that senior military brass and even the president will head here, so expect the culture to get very stodgy very quickly.

4. National Audio-Visual Conservation Center at Mount Pony

 

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Photos: Library of Congress

 

The Mount Pony facility is a 140,000-square-foot bunker filled with 90 miles of shelving that hold 1.1 million video items and 3.5 million audio recordings stored there by the Library of Congress. Combined with the 200-seat movie theater in the complex, the Mount Pony facility is the perfect home for the cinephile.

Like the Greenbrier Resort, the site has been decommissioned as a nuclear bunker so denizens must bring their own supplies and should probably invest in a cot. A waste incinerator would also come in handy.

5. For the book lover: The Notch

The bunker at The Notch was originally the command center for the 8th Air Force in case of an attack, but after it was retired it served as storage for the Federal Reserve and is now where Amherst College which keeps a portion of its archive.

Modern survivors in an apocalypse could peruse the materials and enjoy the artifacts while the air conditioning and high ceilings provide a comfortable living environment. And, since the facility is now owned by colleges, there is no military brass to bother you.

6. Underground Complex at North Bay, Canada

Complete with a gym, a cafeteria, and a barber shop, the Underground Complex at North Bay, Canada was the first major underground bunker for riding out the apocalypse. And, since the bunker is mainly manned by the Canadian military, it’s likely to have a very civil command climate.

Unfortunately, its generators draw from the same air as its personnel, limiting the amount of time the bunker can run before everyone suffocates. Originally, this window of time was measured in hours, though modern, efficient generators and computers might allow days of survivability.

7. The Bunker at Greenbrier

 

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Photo: Wikipedia/Bobak Ha’Eri

The Bunker at the Greenbrier Resort in West Virginia is one of the most famous bunkers of the Cold War. Designed to house 1,100 of Washington’s elite, the facility has its own medical and dental facilities, great decor, and five large meeting rooms. The cafeteria has fake windows with paintings of the countryside for that classic “pre-wasteland” aesthetic.

Since the site has been decommissioned there is no worry of Congress showing up to ruin the party, but residents will have to bring their own food, water, staff, and diesel fuel.

Lists

7 signs a food may not be as healthy as you think it is

Do you ever feel like no matter how healthy you try to eat, there’s something bad sneaking into all your meals? It can be frustrating figuring out what makes a food healthy or not and how a food will impact your body.

A great way to decide if a food is secretly unhealthy is by looking at all the ingredients. If you think a food is healthy, it may surprise you to see the additives or other annoyances that have been slipped into it. If you’re looking to figure out the truth, here are signs a food is unhealthy, even if it appears not to be.


1. It claims to be “reduced-fat”

You may be more inclined to pick up products that tout that they’re “reduced-fat” or “low-fat” on their packages, but that doesn’t exactly mean it’s healthy.

When producers make low-fat or reduced-fat foods, even if they’re lowering the fat content, they’re likely increasing other aspects to make it taste better, including added sugar.

Take a good hard look at the nutrition label to determine if it’s actually the best option for you.

2. It’s gluten-free.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’

Of course, if you have a gluten intolerance or celiac disease, you should absolutely be picking up gluten-free options. But, if you’re just trying to cut out gluten because you think gluten-free options are “healthier” you’re sorely mistaken.

Gluten-free food often contains sugary starches and additives often meant to replicate gluten. Plus, studies suggest that gluten-free foods are not healthier overall, containing more salt and fat than other, similar foods, according to The Washington Post.

3. It claims to be made of whole-grains.

You’ve probably seen a lot of cereals and bread tout that they’re now made with “whole grains” in a claim that they’re now healthier for you. But that isn’t always exactly true.

Because of some loopholes in the definition of “whole grain,” these foods may actually contain all parts of the grain in a fine flour form, something that your body often processes as sugar.

4. It claims that there’s “no sugar added.”

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
(Photo by Charles Haynes)

Although some foods will brag about being “no added sugar,” sometimes that just means there is no sugar in its traditional form. Oftentimes, manufacturers skimp around it by claiming that label but including high-fructose corn syrup or other names for sugar.

While you may only think of syrup as something you’d put on your pancakes, high-fructose corn syrup can be found in most processed foods, according to Healthline. Sure candy may have it, but even foods like deli meat can find it added in. High-fructose corn syrup has been linked to an increased risk of type 2 diabetes, but more research is needed.

It’s important to know all of the ways that sugar can be labeled and not to just go off the front of the label.

5. It’s labeled “organic sugar.”

Although there are foods that experts say are best to buy organic, if you’re debating on buying something with “organic” sugar versus “regular” sugar, it doesn’t really make a difference.

The chemical compound of “organic” sugar is exactly the same, according to HealthLine, so if you’re looking for a healthier choice, this probably isn’t it.

6. It claims to be baked, not fried.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
(Photo by Valters Krontals)

To be clear, baking a food yourself will pretty much always be healthier than getting it fried. But when it comes to processed “junk food,” such as potato chips, just because it’s “baked” doesn’t mean it’s healthy.

In fact, US News blogger Yoni Freedhoff, MD, found that a brand of baked chips had only 38 fewer calories than a classic competitor and contained more salt.

7. It touts that it’s “free-range.”

You may think the chickens that laid your “free-range eggs” are running around, uninhibited and therefore healthier. But the US Department of Agriculture’s guidelines about what “free-range” actually means is basically non-existent. It basically just means that the chickens have access to the outside, according to Salon.

Additionally, a study led by food technologist Deana Jones and cited by Time magazine, claims that “free-range” eggs were not found to be any healthier than “normal” eggs, so sounds like this may be better off ignored altogether.

This article originally appeared on Insider. Follow @thisisInsider on Twitter.

MIGHTY MOVIES

Watch: Navy filmmaker’s ‘Top Gun’ inspired mini-documentary

When Matthew Callahan was first introduced to the movie Top Gun at 2 years old, the film became an instant favorite.

So when the award-winning video producer for the Navy’s All Hands Magazine was tasked with producing a series of videos for Naval Air Station Oceana’s Virtual Air Show last month, Callahan drew inspiration from director Tony Scott’s Cold War classic.

Top Gun was my first true love of cinema,” Callahan told Coffee or Die Magazine. “It’s a movie of its time — the late ’80s, when they were just overdoing everything — but the way it’s filmed is beautiful. I’ll never forget that opening scene with footage at sunrise or sunset on the ship. You don’t often see military personnel and equipment framed that way, where it’s kind of treated like a total spectacle, and I try and capture that same feeling with a lot of my stuff because it cuts through a lot of noise.”


Callahan was part of a three-man production team including All Hands video producer Jimmy Shea and Mass Communication Specialist 2nd Class Michael Jorge. Together, they spent five days producing eight videos for NAS Oceana’s virtual air show. Trying to convey the excitement and spectacle of an air show with a series of short videos is no easy task, but Callahan and his team worked hard to translate their own passion for viewers.

“We produced eight or nine video products in five days,” Callahan said. “The tempo was pretty nonstop. It was exhausting but also amazing.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fp-brLzwc1o
The Next Generation: VFA-106 Prepares F/A-18 Aircrew For Fleet

www.youtube.com

The standout production from the trip is a roughly three-minute video about NAS Oceana’s Strike Fighter Squadron (VFA) 106. The Virginia Beach-based training squadron prepares freshly minted F-18 aircrews for fleet service.

Callahan said for that video he supplemented the team’s production from Virginia with footage provided by the Navy’s advertising agency.

“I asked for cool, sexy carrier footage, and the ad agency really delivered,” Callahan said. “It seems like Top Gun really set a kind of visual precedent for filming jets on an aircraft carrier, and I wanted to produce something fast but serious in a brass-tacks kind of way.”

Callahan said that while he realizes most of his audience engages with his productions online or on mobile devices, he still tries to include some audio and visual treats for true cinephiles who might watch on a larger TV screen or with noise-canceling headphones.

“I’m always editing and creating soundscapes for that one person who might wanna watch these stories on a big display with a good sound system,” he said. “It’s almost never the case, with most folks engaging on mobile, but there’s always gonna be someone who does. I hope that there’s a payoff for those few who chose to watch that way.”

This article originally appeared on Coffee or Die. Follow @CoffeeOrDieMag on Twitter.

Articles

This Green Beret is starring in the first-ever story mode for ‘Madden 18’

For the first time ever, EA Sports’ “Madden” franchise will feature a story mode in “Madden NFL 18.” Called “Longshot,” the story is about overcoming all odds, not just winning football games or scoring the big contract.


“Longshot” is the story of Devin Wade, a quarterback who played at the University of Texas but joined the Army in the middle of his college career. While in, one of Wade’s commanding officers encourages him not to give up on his dream of starting in the NFL.

The captain in “Longshot” is played by a real Green Beret, whose story is very similar to that of Devin Wade. Army veteran Nate Boyer was a Special Forces soldier who played at Texas after leaving the Army.
“It was  a big coincidence that the storylines were so similar, especially with him going to University of Texas,” Boyer told We Are The Mighty. “Some things are switched around. Devin Wade went to college first and then joined the army and now is going back to try and play football in the NFL. But still, it was kind of weird.”

Boyer is joined in the cast by “Moonlight” and “Luke Cage” actor Mahershala Ali, who plays Devin’s dad, Cutter, as well as real pro players J.R. Lemon and Dan Marino.

Even the title “Longshot” resonates in Nate Boyer’s life. ESPN featured Boyer and his story in a piece called “The Longshot.”

ESPN’s feature documented then-34-year-old Boyer trying to get on the Seattle Seahawks as a long snapper after leaving the University of Texas.

“When I came out of the army I was 29 and I never played football in my entire life,” Boyer recalls. “I just wanted to try and make the University of Texas roster. That was like my first goal: Just make the team.”

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Boyer as a Green Beret in Iraq and later as a long snapper with the Seattle Seahawks.

Then Boyer wanted to get on the field. He did. Then he wanted to start. For three years, Boyer was the starting long snapper for the Longhorns. He even made Academic All Big-12 during his tenure.

Now Boyer will play Capt. McCarthy, U.S. Army. He’s part-mentor to Devin, part-life coach. Like Boyer, McCarthy pushes his troops to live without regrets – that they could do anything if they want it badly enough.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’

“Captain McCarthy was kind of like the voice in my own head,” says Boyer. “The good voice. The angel, not the devil on the other shoulder, sort of pushing myself and encouraging myself and wanting me to believe in myself.”

The story mode in “Madden 18” is a simplified version of the game, according to Kotaku. The plays are called by the computer and there are no time outs. You can only control Devin and whichever receiver gets the ball. But you do get to play a pick-up game in a deployed location.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
(EA Sports)

To any aspiring “Devin Wades” out there who might be wearing the uniform of the United States right now, but who hope to wear an NFL uniform (or any uniform) in the future, Boyer recommends fearlessness and hard work.

“No matter what it is you’re interested in, if it’s something positive and it challenges you, just go for it,” he says. “Even if you’re a little afraid to pursue it, just put everything you have into it. Take the things you overcome and accomplish, the sacrifices you make, and apply that moving forward. The military is a stepping stone, not the pinnacle of your life. Find that next challenge.”
Articles

The US military took these incredible photos this week

The military has very talented photographers in its ranks, and they constantly attempt to capture what life as a service member is like during training and at war. This is the best of what they shot this week:


NAVY

An MV-22 Osprey takes off from the flight deck of the amphibious assault ship USS Bonhomme Richard (LHD 6).

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Photo by: Mass Communication Specialist 3rd Class Taylor A. Elberg/USN

MARINETTE, Wis., (July 18, 2015) The littoral combat ship Pre-Commissioning Unit (PCU) Little Rock (LCS 9) is launched into the Menominee River in Marinette, Wisc. after a christening ceremony at the Marinette Marine Corporation shipyard.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Photo by: USN

MARINE CORPS

Lance Cpl. David Sellers, a refrigeration mechanic with the 24th Marine Expeditionary Unit, embraces his wife with a kiss during the Command Element’s homecoming at Camp Lejeune, North Carolina.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Photo by: Cpl. Todd F. Michalek/USMC

I SAW You

A Marine with Golf Company, 2nd Battalion, 2nd Marines provides cover for fellow Marines moving between buildings during a military operations in urban terrain training event aboard Camp Lejeune, N.C.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Photo by: Lance Cpl. Chris Garcia/USMC

SOUTHWEST, Asia – U.S. Marine Lance Cpl. Zachary Claus and Lance Cpl. Luis Alvarez, avionics technicians with Marine Medium Tiltrotor Squadron – 165 (VMM – 165), Special Purpose Marine Air – Ground Task Force – Crisis Response – Central Command, take multimeter readings from the engine of an MV–22 Osprey.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Photo by: Lance Cpl. Garrett White/USMC

ARMY

Marines assigned to 1st Reconnaissance Battalion, 1st Marine Division, and an Army instructor assigned to U.S. Army Alaska‘s Northern Warfare Training Center, conduct military alpine operations, at Black Rapids Training Site and Gulkana Glacier.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Photo by: Staff Sgt. Sean Callahan/US Army

A soldier, assigned to the Georgia National Guard, fires a Mark 19 40-mm grenade machine gun from a Humvee during mounted weapons qualification, part of the unit’s annual training, at Fort Stewart, Ga., July 21, 2015.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Photo by: Capt. William Carraway/National Guard

AIR FORCE

The Thunderbirds Delta Formation flies over Niagara Falls, N.Y., July 20, 2015.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Photo by: Senior Airman Jason Couillard/USAF

Five members of the U.S. Air Force Thunderbirds fly in formation behind a KC-135 Stratotanker assigned to McConnell Air Force Base, Kan, July 23, 2015. The Thunderbirds are the Air Force’s premier air demonstration team and perform at different events across the country every year.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Photo by: Senior Airman Victor J. Caputo/USAF

COAST GUARD

Line handlers from the Coast Guard Cutter Spencer moor the Coast Guard Barque Eagle in Boston, Thursday, July 23, 2015. The Eagle was operated by the pre-World War II German navy and taken as a war reparation by the U.S., is now a training ship where cadets and officer candidates learn leadership and practical seamanship skills.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Photo by: Petty Officer 2nd Class Cynthia Oldham/USCG

The Coast Guard Barque Eagle is in Boston Harbor, Thursday, July 23, 2015. The Eagle, operated by the pre-World War II German navy and taken as a war reparation by the U.S., is now a training ship where cadets and officer candidates learn leadership and practical seamanship skills.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’
Photo by: Petty Officer 2nd Class Cynthia Oldham/USCG

NOW: More awesome military photos

OR: The 13 funniest military memes of the week

MIGHTY CULTURE

Marine artist Maximilian Uriarte publishes compelling new graphic novel

Maximilian Uriarte is the renowned creator of the popular Terminal Lance comics and New York Times Best Seller The White Donkey. Uriarte’s new graphic novel, Battle Born: Lapis Lazuli, lends a raw and compelling, modern voice to the combat veteran experience. But before he did all of that, he was a Marine.

Artistry and the Marine Corps aren’t words that you typically see put in the same sentence, but Uriarte himself defies any Marine stereotype. “I’ve been an artist my whole life. I was always the kid in school drawing in the back,” he said with a smile. “I joined the Marine Corps infantry to become a better artist. I viewed it as a soul enriching experience.” He’s well aware that most people don’t use those words as a reason to join what is thought of as the toughest branch of service.


When Uriarte joined the Corps in 2006, he was adamant about becoming an infantryman – even though his high ASVAB scores allowed him to pick almost any MOS. But he shared that he wanted to do something that would shape him as a person, making him better. So, with his recruiter shaking his head in bafflement in the background, Uriarte signed on at 19 years old to become a 0351 Assaultman.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’

It was a decision that took his family by complete surprise, especially with the Iraq war in full swing. Raised in Oregon, Uriarte hadn’t been around the military but always knew he wanted to do something to challenge himself — something he was confident the Marine Corps would do. The year after he joined, Uriarte was deployed to the Al Zaidan region of Iraq with the 3rd Battalion, 3rd Marines from 2007 to 2008.

Uriarte deployed to Iraq once again in 2009 and this time, had the chance to be a part of Combat Camera. It was here that he really started examining his experiences as a Marine and he began developing the now infamous Terminal Lance comic strip. He launched it in 2010, five months before his enlistment with the Corps was up.

“When I put it out [Terminal Lance] I really thought I was going to get into trouble,” Uriarte said with a laugh. What sparked its creation was being surrounded by positive Marine stories, told in what he describes as an ever-present “oorah” tone. “To me, it seemed not authentic to the experience I had as a Marine Corps infantryman going to Iraq twice. Everyone hated being in Iraq, no one wanted to go there.”

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’

The Marines loved Terminal Lance. It wasn’t long before it became a cultural phenomenon throughout the military as a whole and Uriarte became known as a hero among young Marines.

Uriarte shared that he had always wanted to do a web comic and the Marine Corps was definitely an interesting subject matter for him to dissect. “In a way, it was cathartic. The experience isn’t something most humans go through. Doing it helped me move on in a healthy way,” he said. While authoring the comic strip, he earned his Bachelor of Fine Arts degree with a major in Animation through the California College of the Fine Arts.

In 2013, Uriarte self-published The White Donkey after a successful kickstarter, which raised 0,000 for the book. A few months after its release, it was so successful it was picked up by traditional publishing and went on to become a New York Times Best Seller. The gripping graphic novel pulls back the curtain to expose the raw cost of war, especially for Marines serving in combat.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’

Uriarte knew he wanted to keep going and this time, wanted to take his storytelling a bit further. It was his hope that he could create something focused on the importance of human connection. Through all of this, he created Battle Born.

“It’s a story of a platoon of Marines going to Afghanistan, to fight the Taliban over the gemstone economy…. But it’s really about Sergeant King and his emotional journey,” Uriarte explained. He shared that he really wanted the character to reflect a modern day Conan The Barbarian, who he feels would definitely be a Marine.

“It’s really a meditation on the history of Afghanistan in the shadow of western imperialism, colonialism and looking at the tragic history of Afghanistan,” Uriarte said. “What does it mean to be civilized, is really the central theme of the book.”

Uriarte’s main passion is creating good stories that he himself wanted to see. He had never seen anything like Battle Born before – a Marine infantryman story that was very human grounded. “I truly believe that representation matters. It’s a lens I don’t think we’ve seen a war movie through before – the eyes of a black main character,” he explained.

7 life lessons we learned from ‘In The Army Now’

Hollywood agrees: The book is currently in film development to become a live action film.

The biggest piece of advice he hopes to impart on service members getting out of the military is to use their GI Bill and go to school when their enlistment is up. “Just go and figure yourself out. It is a very safe place to decompress,” he explained. “The Marine Corps is very good at making Marines, but it’s bad at unmaking them. It’s a hard thing come back to the world and not be a Marine or in the military anymore.”

The 2018 annual suicide report found that soldiers and Marines took their own lives at a significantly higher rate than the other branches.

Uriarte struggled himself when he got out, but he found that school and writing was therapeutic for him. “When you get out, the thing Marines struggle with the most is, ‘Who am I?’ We always say, ‘Once a Marine always a Marine,’ but I think that is unhealthy,” he said. “People wonder why we have such high veteran suicides and it’s because we turn them into something they aren’t going to be for the rest of their lives.”

When asked what he wants readers to take from his work, Uriarte was quick to answer. “These are really stories of human experiences; passion, love and loss. It’s just showing that people are human and that Marines, especially, are human,” he explained. Uriarte also feels that his latest full-color graphic novel will appeal not just to those who enjoy comics, but to a wide spectrum of readers through a beautiful visual journey.

Uriarte uniquely tackles the difficulty of being a Marine and serving in the military with raw honesty and creativity through all of his work. His newest book, Battle Born: Lapis Lazuli is a deeply compelling compilation of the human experiences that affect us all.

You can purchase Battle Born Lapis: Lazuli and his other work at your local Walmart, Target or online through Amazon by clicking here.

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