The last few months have been so crazy that it’s easy to forget that America’s sixth-generation fighter is numbered, at least in part, as a nod to the sitting president.
According to the Air Force, numbering the plane F-47 “honors the legacy of the P-47, whose contributions to air superiority during World War II remain historic. Additionally, the number pays tribute to the founding year of the Air Force, while also recognizing the 47th President’s pivotal support for the development of the world’s first sixth-generation fighter.”
An important aside: The Air Force has now recycled the P-47’s name, Thunderbolt, and its number, P-47, separately, with no such honor for the P-51 Mustang, which has not seen its name nor number recycled in its honor. Same with the Navy’s F-6 Hellcat and F-4 Corsair. But the P-47 Thunderbolt is now the namesake of the A-10 Thunderbolt II and the F-47.
But if we’re now numbering planes in recognition of presidents, we thought it would be nice to take a walk down memory lane and see what traits other American fighters shared with their presidential number mate.
The F-15 and James Buchanan
If there’s any plane that outperformed its namesake, it’s the F-15 and James Buchanan. While Buchanan was ignoring America’s fall into the Civil War in preference of wanking it into the bushes (or whatever the hell it was that he was doing instead of putting down the nascent Confederacy), the F-15 is high-flying and has rarely seen a war that it didn’t want to fight in and wasn’t likely to win.
At least the F-15 was decisive in every engagement it has ever fought in, racking up over 100 losses with, probably, zero losses. (There are no losses of U.S. F-15s, and no foreign military has produced evidence to confirm a claimed kill against exported F-15s.)
The F-16 and Abraham Lincoln
The F-16. With greater range and chopping power, the F-16 is a perfect parallel to Abraham Lincoln, the former Illinois militiaman who wrestled in about 300 matches and only lost once. Mess with this eagle, and your soul is about to get proclaimed emancipated from your body. There’s a reason you can catch F-16 pilots in a movie theater or a burlesque show but never in front of a play.
The F/A-18 and Ulysses S. Grant
The F/A-18. Ulysses S. Grant. This pick would be an ironic one, since this naval fighter’s presidential namesake started his career a famous Army general. This aircraft is specially designed to be lethal in the hands of sailors, whether they’re on a carefully planned and executed Overland Campaign or a Yazoo River Bender, drinking like U.S. Grant.
The F-22 and Grover Cleveland
The F-22. It may be odd to think there’s a fighter jet named after a sheriff-turned-president. But this thing shows up, makes a mess, and leaves with most of the neighborhood none the wiser. Then, a few years later, there’s a reckoning to be had, just like Grover Cleveland with all those babies who didn’t know their father. At least he paid child support, though, which we can’t always say for F-22s or their pilots. (Call me, Vanessa!)
Fun bonus fact: If the F-22 re-enters production, it’s required to re-designate as the F-24, in a nod to Grover being the first president to hold two non-consecutive terms.
The F-35 and John F. Kennedy
The F-35. It’s so stealthy you’ll likely never know how many notches this beast has in its pistol belt, just like with John F. Kennedy and the notches in his bedpost. Just keep an eye out for Jacqueline and Lee Harvey (but for very different reasons).
It does have one connection to President Kennedy’s successor, Lyndon B. Johnson, however. It loves to turn its underside to the crowds and open its bays for everyone to see.
The retired F-14 and the long-dead Franklin Pierce
The grandfathered-in F-14, the nonbinary fighter jet, neither fully swept-wing nor straight-wing. There is an odd parallel between a compromise candidate for president and a swing-wing jet made to operate well at both low and high speeds. Its number-mate is Franklin Pierce, well-known for his voluntary service in the Mexican-American War, even after an injury nearly sidelined him and led some of his men to accuse him of cowardice.
And of course, if there has ever been a fighter jet that limped its way through desert fighting despite unrepaired damage, it’s the F-14s that fought almost a decade in the Iran-Iraq War after America cut off the flow of replacements, ammunition, and spare parts.
Eventually, we’ll learn which future presidents will partner with planes like the P-51 and F-111. Only another 16 to 32 years for one and about 300 to 400 years for the other.
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