The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas - We Are The Mighty
MIGHTY GAMING

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

The Fallout game series does a great job of giving the player choices. Particularly, they give you the option to choose whatever faction is warring over the region of the post-apocalyptic wasteland you’re playing around in. New Vegas is no exception. The thing that stands out is the fact that, out of the factions warring over the New Vegas Strip, none of them are really that awesome. The worst of them, however, is Caesar’s Legion.

At the start of the game, the looming threat of a second battle of the Hoover Dam is coming with Caesar’s Roman Empire inspired Legion and the New California Republic’s Troopers and Rangers. Caesar’s Legion, with or without the help of the Courier, was doomed from the beginning. Even if they win the battle, eventually, they’re bound to fall.

Here’s why:


The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Here’s what the Legion has to say about it.

(Bethesda/Obsidian)

Women aren’t welcome… at all

The issue here is that Caesar is automatically cutting a large potential portion of his ranks by only limiting them to males. In a post-apocalyptic wasteland, any army should be open to taking as many bodies as they can get. If most of the human population has already been wiped off the planet and the survivors face worse dangers than other humans, why not include women? After all, two guns in a fight are better than one.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Oh, and they’ve got slaves.

(Bethesda/Obsidian)

Human atrocities

The Legion built an infamous reputation by tearing up enemy tribes and killing those who didn’t want to fall under their banner. Anyone else was tortured and killed. Ruling with an iron fist is a great way to get the civilians to rise up against you and usurp you from command.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

There’s that old saying about bringing a knife to a gunfight, right?

(Bethesda/Obsidian)

Minimal use of guns

The Legion absolutely uses guns. However, they find it more honorable to fight with bladed weapons or meet their opponents in close combat. While one may commend this mentality, it’s just not sensible.

When the Legion’s greatest adversary, the NCR, finds its strength in the use of snipers, when will your best get to fight if they get dome-pieced 500 yards away?

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

They’ve also got cool armor.

(Bethesda/Obsidian)

Enemy willpower

The NCR, though not in the best shape during the events of New Vegas, have greater willpower and cause. While they may not be perfect, they’ve still got a much stronger will than the Legion. Even if the Legion beat the NCR back, the NCR would find a way to regroup and strike back harder than before.

MIGHTY CULTURE

Defectors living openly in US happens ‘far more often than people would think’

A former Russian official whose background matches descriptions of a high-level CIA spy hurriedly extracted from Russia has been living openly outside Washington, DC, under his own name.

According to documents from a 2017 real-estate purchase reviewed by Insider, Oleg Smolenkov bought a house in the DC area in 2018 for $925,000.

Intelligence sources told Insider that such a situation — a former agent living under his own name — was less unusual than it might at first appear, partly because of precedent and the unique personality type of high-level sources.


Smolenkov was named in Russian media Sep. 10, 2019, as a possible identity of the extracted spy. Reuters and the BBC were among Western outlets to also report the name.

A spokesman for the Kremlin said Smolenkov had worked for the Russian state but reportedly dismissed reports that a high-level spy had been extracted as “pulp fiction.”

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Smolenkov was named in the wake of reports by The New York Times and CNN that described an unnamed Russian official who worked for the CIA for decades before fleeing to the US in the wake of the 2016 presidential election.

The descriptions from Russia of Smolenkov’s work for the Kremlin, the timing of his disappearance in 2017, and his presence in the suburbs of Washington, DC, appear to match the reports.

When an NBC News reporter knocked on the door of the Smolenkov house Sep. 9, 2019, he was intercepted by unidentified men asking what he was doing.

Two former FBI officials told NBC News that they thought the man in Virginia was the intelligence asset.

That asset is reported to have supplied critical information that helped shape the US government’s understanding of Russian interference in the 2016 presidential election.

The asset’s identity remains unconfirmed. Among assets in a similar position, however, the practice of living openly in a Western country under a real name would not be unusual, according to a former US Drug Enforcement Agency agent who regularly ran intelligence and drug-cartel sources.

“Not shocking at all to those of us who have been there,” said the former member of the DEA’s special-operations division, which handles high-level investigations and sources.

“A guy like Smolenkov spent decades working his way to the top of the Russian government and succeeded while also being an asset for the CIA,” the source said. He asked for anonymity to protect former sources and assets around the world.

“That level of political success at the same time he knew every day for decades he could be revealed and arrested usually requires a special level of ego and appetite for risk,” the source said.

“So it’s not shocking that the first reports said he turned down a chance in 2016 to escape before being convinced by the media coverage that he finally had to go in 2017. Getting him to give up that level of status inside his own homeland along with the status he secretly held with the CIA … it’s a powerful combination.”

Three other former intelligence agents contacted by Insider were less willing to talk about the story, which immediately grabbed the attention of the media and intelligence circles Sep. 9, 2019.

But all three noted that Russian intelligence assets tended to keep their identities intact after defection despite usual pleas from their handlers to adopt fake names and go into hiding.

All three noted that the Russian defectors Sergei Skripal and Alexander Litvinenko lived openly in the UK after fleeing Russia and continued to consult for intelligence services and private companies under their own names.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Footage of Sergei Skripal’s 2006 trial.

(Sky News)

Both men were poisoned in cases where UK has blamed the Russian state.

Skripal and his daughter narrowly survived a nerve-agent poisoning in 2018, while Litvinenko died in 2006 after drinking tea laced with radioactive poison.

“It’s unlikely that someone with the level of ambition to rise that high in the Kremlin while working as an agent for the Americans would want to easily drop the social status that came with both sides of their double life,” the former DEA agent said.

“And it gets even harder to convince them they’re actually threatened and need to go into deep witness-protection programs if they have families that probably didn’t know they were working for another country on the side.

“Then you add that these are people rather used to risk and living off their wits and so ego plays a huge role.”

When asked how often high-level defectors refused to completely abandon their old life and identity, the former DEA agent said “far more often than people would think.”

This article originally appeared on Business Insider. Follow @BusinessInsider on Twitter.

MIGHTY TRENDING

New training will make Marines fight one another

Marines are about to face far-less predictable training that will challenge young leaders to outsmart sophisticated enemies with high-tech weapons and tools.

More force-on-force freestyle training will replace scripted scenarios in the years ahead, Lt. Gen. David Berger, head of Marine Corps Combat Development Command, told Military.com.

“We need to teach Marine leaders how to think on their feet,” he said. “We’re going to see a lot more of that graduate- or varsity-level thinking leader, and I need them figuring out how they can outthink me.”


The move follows a new national defense strategy that warns of long-term threats from strategic competitors like Russia and China. To be ready, the Marine Corps “must move beyond ‘scripted’ live-fire maneuvers and incorporate more force-on-force training in a free-play environment,” Commandant Gen. Robert Neller wrote in a Sept. 26, 2018 white letter to senior leaders.

“To meet the challenges of a peer-to-peer fight, we must incorporate independent actions and opposing will in our training at all levels,” Neller wrote. “Just as iron sharpens iron, an aggressive [force-on-force] training regime will test the limits of our capabilities, refine our actions, and prepare us for the fight to come.”

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Marines with 1st Battalion, 3rd Marine Regiment, dart across a danger area to clear remaining compounds in their area of operation at Marine Corps Training Area Bellows, Hawaii, Sept. 30, 2013.

(U.S. Marine Corps photo by Cpl. Matthew Callahan)

Much of that will take shape at Marine Corps Air-Ground Combat Center Twentynine Palms in California, Berger said, where units complete the Integrated-Training Exercises that prepare them for combat.

The live-fire maneuver training Marines have practiced for decades and the simulations that ramped up during the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan won’t go away. That training will just be balanced with peer-to-peer fights during which one group of Marines is tasked with playing the good guys and the others, the foe.

And there are benefits to being on either side of those mock fights, Berger said.

“We’ll get better, but the training will also be more dynamic,” he said. “We need to fight as the foe would fight, so think about how they would be organized, trained and equipped. We also must better understand how they would use rockets, drones, planes and more.”

Marine leaders are still working on guidance that will better shape the plans for force-on-force training. In the meantime, Neller said the entire service must develop the mindset and skills necessary to prevail in the coming fight.

“We must ruthlessly test ourselves, conduct honest after-action reviews, make refinements and test ourselves again,” he wrote.

This article originally appeared on Military.com. Follow @militarydotcom on Twitter.

MIGHTY TACTICAL

Researchers find warship wreck near Alaska lost for 75 years

Almost exactly 75 years ago, on Aug. 18, 1943, the USS Abner Read was rocked by a severe explosion.

The blast — which most historians say was likely a Japanese mine — tore the 75-foot stern section of the ship clean off. The stern plummeted to the depths of the ocean, taking the lives of 71 US sailors with it, while other US ships rushed to the rescue.

Though the rest of the USS Abner Read was miraculously saved and towed into port, the original stern was thought to be lost forever — until now.


On July 17, 2018, a team of scientists, divers, and archaeologists partially funded by the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration discovered the missing section of the ship in just under 300 feet of water off the coast of Kiska Island, a part of Alaska’s remote Aleutian Islands chain.

Here’s what the expedition to discover the long-lost wreck was like.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

The R/V Norseman II at sea near the Aleutians.

(Kiska: Alaska’s Underwater Battlefield expedition)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

A North American B-25 Mitchell Glides over an American destroyer after taking off from Unmak Island for a raid on the Japanese base at Kiska.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

USS Abner Read (DD 526) as seen in Hunters Point, California on June 13, 1943.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

The 474-feet long Japanese transport ship Nisan Maru sunk in Kiska Harbor after it was stuck by bombs dropped by the US 11th Air force on June 18, 1942. Two other Japanese ships are visible in the harbor nearby.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

USS Abner Read (DD 526) afire and sinking in Leyte Gulf, Nov. 1, 1944, after being hit by a kamikaze. A second Japanese suicide plane (circled) is attempting to crash another ship; however, this one was shot down short of its target.

(U.S. Navy Photo)

After the stern section of the Abner Read sunk on Aug. 18, 1943, it remained lost on the bottom of the sea for almost 75 years. The ship was eventually repaired and re-entered active service.

In 1944, the Abner Read was sunk off the coast of the Philippines by a Japanese dive bomber, as seen in the image above.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

US soldiers inspect Japanese midget subs left behind after the US retook Kiska Island.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Team members launch one of the project’s four REMUS 100 autonomous underwater vehicles from R/V Norseman II for a survey of the seafloor.

(Kiska: Alaska’s Underwater Battlefield expedition)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Team member Matt Breece lowers the project ROV over the side of Research Vessel Norseman II.

(Kiska: Alaska’s Underwater Battlefield expedition)

The expedition was part of Project Recover, a collaborative partnership between the University of Delaware, the Scripps Institution of Oceanography at the University of California, San Diego, Bent Prop, a nonprofit, and US Navy partners to find and document the underwater resting places of American soldiers from World War II.

Source: Project Recover

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Project Recover team members perform maintenance on a REMUS 100 AUV.

(Project Recover)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

A dive team deploys to investigate sonar targets collected by the REMUS 100 AUV. The R/V Norseman II sails in the background.

(Kiska: Alaska’s Underwater Battlefield expedition)

“The 17 hours of daylight that now occur at this high latitude were both a godsend and a curse as there was ample time to work, but little time to sleep,” Eric Terrill, an oceanographer and the leader of the expedition, said in a mission log.

Source: NOAA

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Project Recover team members Bob Hess and Eric Terrill prepare to launch one of four REMUS 100 AUVs utilized during a survey.

(NOAA Project Recover)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

A REMUS 100 AUV glides away from a research boat before diving beneath the surface, where it would spend the next six hours systematically scanning the seafloor.

(Project Recover)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

A view from Kiska Island overlooking a cannon, sunken ship, and the Norseman II.

(Kiska: Alaska’s Underwater Battlefield expedition)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Members of the expedition take time to examine a Japanese mini submarine that remains on Kiska Island.

(Kiska: Alaska’s Underwater Battlefield expedition)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

A 120-millimeter anti-aircraft gun on Kiska Island.

(Kiska: Alaska’s Underwater Battlefield expedition)

While beautiful, the island is a frigid, haunting monument to a battle that claimed the lives of almost 5,000 Japanese and American men.

Source: NOAA

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Historical image of the USS Abner Read. The red box indicates that section of the vessel that was blown off and sunk when the vessel struck a mine on Aug. 18, 1943.

(U.S. Navy photo)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Wreckage of the USS Abner Read captured by the project’s remotely operated vehicle.

(Kiska: Alaska’s Underwater Battlefield expedition)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

The inside of the hull of the USS Abner Read’s stern.

(Kiska: Alaska’s Underwater Battlefield expedition)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

A giant Pacific octopus now lives on the wreckage.

(Kiska: Alaska’s Underwater Battlefield expedition)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Wreckage of the USS Abner Read captured by the project’s ROV.

(Kiska: Alaska’s Underwater Battlefield expedition)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Team members explore the island.

(NOAA Project Recover)

“We take our responsibility to protect these wrecks seriously,” Samuel Cox, the director of the Naval History and Heritage Command said. The USS Abner Read is the “last resting place of American sailors,” he added.

This article originally appeared on Business Insider. Follow @BusinessInsider on Twitter.

Articles

7 mind hacks Navy SEALs use to take on everything

From day one, Navy SEAL training requires complete dedication from your body and your mind. You can prepare your body for the physical toll BUD/S will exact on you, but mental preparation is something else altogether. Navy SEALs gave out some of their mental preparation hacks that not only got them through training, but also through the high operations tempo SEALs face these days.


But even if you can’t be a SEAL (for whatever reason) or you don’t want to be (for whatever reason), you can still use Navy SEAL mind tricks to advance yourself along the path to your personal or professional goals using the tips in the infographic below, courtesy of Mike’s Gear Reviews.

We’ve all heard SEAL quotes before. “Get comfortable with being uncomfortable,” “the only easy day was yesterday,” and, of course, the ever-accurate “40 percent rule.” Get ready for some new axioms, because these might help you conquer the world — or at least the world as you see it.

Chances are good that you have a big event coming up in your life (and if you don’t, what are you doing? Go find one!) and you’ll need some focus, mental clarity, and calmness before you go out and change the world. Remember to visualize your objectives. Observe, orient, decide, and act. Trigger your consciousness. Control your arousal. Convert your fears to confidence.

And above all, save room for the Hooyah.

MIGHTY CULTURE

41 things you can do to be a better husband right now

The first step to becoming a better husband is to, well, try to be a better husband. It’s as simple as that. Marriages thrive when partners play active roles in the relationship, paying mind to everything from the daily maintenance of the marriage to personal care in hopes of understanding yourself better for the other. In other words: It’s all about making an effort. Do the work, and you’ll be rewarded. Want to start? Well, there are a number of small, nice things that all of us can focus on to be happier, more present, and more attentive husbands and partners.


Talk about your feelings honestly. When she asks you how your day is, tell her about something that made you upset or annoyed. Don’t just say your day was “okay,” and leave it at that.

Take over for the evening. Don’t announce it or plan it ahead. Once the kids are bathed, brushed, dressed, read to, and in bed, tell your spouse they’re ready for a good night kiss.

Ask your wife about her day. Have at least one follow-up question. Then, tell her about yours. And answer her questions with more words “fine” and “eh.” Make this a habit.

Make a constructed effort to interrupt her less when she’s talking. If she seems like she’s in between two thoughts, give her five seconds. If she doesn’t say anything, then speak.

Clean that thing you know she hates cleaning. You don’t even need to tell her you did it. She’ll notice.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(Photo by Christian Gonzalez)

Do the dishes when it’s “not your turn.”

Stay in good shape. Part of the gig is trying to remain attractive.

Go to the doctor. Part of the gig is not dying.

Be nice to her friends because they’re her friends and for no other reason.

Be honest even when it’s hard. Confrontation is not always bad. It’s critical to moving forward.

Explain why you’re excited about the things that excite you. Don’t keep her on the outside of the things you like.

If someone is rude to her in a social situation, ask for permission to be rude back. If granted, go to fucking town.

Oral Sex. We’re all adults here.

If she seems like she wants to be left alone, don’t take it as a referendum on anything. Just leave her alone.

Listen to and empathize with her problems. Say: “That sucks. I’m sorry.” Don’t try to fix the problems unless she asks for your advice.

Does she like SMPDA — that is, social media public displays of affection? Then post about her earnestly on social media every so often. Even if it’s a photo of her with the heart-eyed emoji, it may not be your thing, but because it’s not it will mean more.

Don’t hold back small seemingly insignificant compliments. If she really impressed you by parallel parking, her lunch order, or how she de-escalated a toddler tantrum, tell her.

Be the keeper of your love story. Get nostalgic about your relationship, from time to time. Reminisce about how you met. Bring it up with friends.

Journal about the things you’re upset about before vocalizing them to your spouse. It might help you see some of the things bothering you are not worth complaining about.

Your wife is not your therapist. If you are struggling, and she’s the only person you lean on, think about going to therapy. Therapy rules.

Leave nice notes. They don’t have to be long or saccharine, they just have to be original.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(Photo by John Jones)

Make a decision when she doesn’t want to. Let her make a decision when she does. Know the difference.

Be kind. The world is mean, your marriage shouldn’t be.

When you introduce her to your friends or coworkers, mention one of her accomplishments.

Make an effort to look presentable. Shave or clean up your beard regularly. Dress nice. Don’t be a schlub. No one wants to be married to a schlub 24/7.

If you make yourself something — tea, a sandwich, a stiff cocktail — offer to make her one, too.

Take her side in family squabbles whenever possible. If you sense a family squabble might happen, discuss it beforehand to get on the same page. Then, talk about how you’ll mount your defense together.

Keep your promises.

Talk to her about what she likes in bed. Don’t assume that you know. Do that thing.

Give her the benefit of the doubt. She’s allowed to be in bad moods for no reason.

Take some tasteful nudes.

When you become impatient with her, take a few deep breaths. Walk away if you need to. Remember you love her even when you don’t like her.

Get rid of your unreasonable expectations about who you think she should be.

Call just to say hi.

When she asks you to go on a run with her, go, even if you hate it. Especially if you hate it. She’ll know you did it just because you love her.

When your wife talks about a sexist thing that happened to her that day, don’t give the man in the story the benefit of the doubt. Talk shit about him with your wife.

Be enthusiastic about her favorite TV shows, even if it’s bad reality TV. Get into it. Make fun of the contestants. Ask her who her favorite person on the show is. Root for someone.

When your wife asks you how she looks in something, and if she doesn’t look great, tell her about another dress you like. Provide an alternative. Tell her you love her in it.

When you get in a fight, use “I” statements. Don’t put your anger on her. Make sure she knows it’s about how you’re feeling.

If you don’t know where something is in your house, actually look for it before you ask. You are not a clueless intern. You are her partner.

Tell her — and demonstrate — that you love her.

This article originally appeared on Fatherly. Follow @FatherlyHQ on Twitter.

MIGHTY HISTORY

Teddy Roosevelt IV became a Navy SEAL to fight in Vietnam

Like it or not, the United States has political family dynasties that extend across generations. Despite all the focus on the Bush and Clinton dynasties at the end of the 20th Century and into the 21st Century, it’s still hard to forget the greatest American family name to ever appear on a ballot: Roosevelt.


Roosevelt is the family that brought us terms like square deal, new deal, and Rough Riders that we use to this day. From Theodore’s then-progressive views on preserving the natural beauty of the United States to Franklin’s cool leadership through our toughest decades since the Civil War, Roosevelts have long stood for everything that is good about America, even if the two most notable members sat on different sides of the political aisle.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

The later generations weren’t as politically active as their presidential ancestors, but their dedication to service never diminished. Roosevelts have served in the Army and Navy, as state legislators, the CIA and its forerunner, the Office of Strategic Services, just to name a few. Roosevelts fought in the trenches of World War I and landed at Normandy during D-Day.

There was even a Roosevelt silently stalking the Viet Cong in the jungles of Vietnam: Theodore Roosevelt IV.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Even as a Frogman, it’s hard to outshine the original TR.

TR-4 (as he’s called by some in the special operations community), graduated from BUD/S class 36 and deployed to Vietnam with UDT 11 as a Navy officer for two years. During his time in Vietnam, SEALs were becoming proficient at kill-or-capture missions against mid-level Viet Cong leaders. The VC were trying to form a shadow government in South Vietnam, in preparation for an eventual U.S. withdrawal and reunification of the country. The SEALs collected intelligence and then traced them to their hideouts among the civilian populations.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

TR-4 today.

In the years following his service in the Navy, he joined the U.S. Foreign Service, serving in Washington, DC, and what is now Burkina Faso. Like his great-grandfather, Theodore Roosevelt IV advocates for conservation issues and works in favor of non-partisan anti-corruption efforts. TR-4 doesn’t seek public office, he’s an investment banker and a member of numerous political and public policy-related groups.

And yes, there is a Theodore Roosevelt V.

MIGHTY CULTURE

The 13 funniest military memes for the week of January 10th

There hasn’t been a more shining example of how great the military meme community can be than when its faced with a possible WWIII. The media is reporting every last detail, the civilians are clutching their pearls, and the vets? We’re completely unphased at the prospect of another multi-decade war.

All geopolitics and possible danger aside, at least gearing up for war is a hell of a lot better than just sitting around doing CQ, motor pool Mondays, and online correspondence courses…


Actual war may be benched – but the meme war will continue!

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(Meme via Army as F*ck)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(Meme via Jenna Boom)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(Meme via Roller Vader)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

​(Meme via US Army WTF Moments Memes)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(Meme via Call for Fire)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(Meme via Team Non-Rec)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(Meme via Not CID)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(Meme via Victor Alpha Clothing)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(Meme via Lost in the Sauce)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(Meme via PT Belt Nation)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(Meme via Disgruntled Vets)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(Meme via Pop Smoke)

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

​(Meme via Decelerate Your Life)

MIGHTY SURVIVAL

These are the 50 best COVID-19 memes for the week of April 6

Another week in isolation, another week of memes. We’re grateful for the people of the internet who are using their creative energy to make us laugh. From Tiger King to overindulging on our quarantine snacks, these are our 50 favorite memes for the week.


The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

1. Shelf sustainable and so delicious

Plus, so, so cheap.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

2. We miss sports

To be fair, I think that’s a little more than six feet. Go Chiefs!

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

3. You’re open?

I’ve probably done this.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

4. Higher power + slushies

While this wasn’t original to the COVID-19 pandemic, it’s been retweeted lately since it’s so appropriate now.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

5. The Cure

Hahahaha. Sorry, not sorry.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

6. Ok, actually sorry

2020: Hold my beer.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

7. Need some new hobbies

Bonus points if you like to touch your face in restaurants.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

8. Poor Ernie

I wonder if he and Bert are social distancing?

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

9. Chomp

Live footage of me at Costco.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

10. Beauty and the Beast

Excited to be singing this for the next three months.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

11. Love in the time of COVID-19

The honeymoon is definitely over.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

12. Dolly has the truth

Also 11:00pm – 2:00am.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

13. No expert needed

These are a relic!

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

14. Groundhog Day

Hard to see your shadow if you’re not allowed outside…

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

15. SMWP&L ISO SWTP

Polish up on your conversation skills since ya’ll aren’t going to meet in person for awhile.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

16. Mr. Rogers

Also, carry the one.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

17. Baby Yoda knows

​Seriously, why hasn’t soap always been anecessity?

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

18. World’s Best Boss

The Michael Scott cringe is real.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

19. Rainy days

At this point, my kids would prefer a paper bag.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

20. Get it, Sheryl

Like a good neighbor, a She Shed is there.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

21. Lenten sacrifice

Friends, family, parks, dining in public, the list goes on…

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

22. The force be with you

You’re on mute, Luke!

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

23. April Fools

Spoiler alert: It didn’t happen.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

24. Refund requested

Unsubscribe us from this year, please.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

25. Spider pun

You know you’re going to repeat this one.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

26. #truth

Oh how the little things seem so big now!

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

27. The windows to the walls

Raise the roof, my friends.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

28. When you’re digging deep in the freezer

Quarantine doesn’t necessarily bring out the best in us. And kids are learning allll sorts of new vocab words.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

29. The Last Supper

Holy Week is definitely a little different this year…

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

30. 

But if there’s a taco eat-a-long, I’m in.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

31. Brady Bunch 

Pretty much every zoom classroom meeting.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

32. Oh Dwight

Stanley knows what’s up.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

33. The days

^^^ All the times I haven’t worn real pants.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

34. It all runs together

Fridays have never been so obsolete.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

35. Scrub-a-dub

Baths are the new big event.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

36. Carol for the win

You cool cats and kittens.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

37. Arts and crafts for the win

It’s a big stress relief.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

38. For-ev-er

She’s definitely aging better than most of us.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

39. The hand off

Not pictured: the wine glass handing the baton to the bourbon.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

40. Life skills

Make sure your selfie shows some sort of self-preservation ability.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

41. Joe Exotic

Or RC Cola.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

42. Mattress games 

Also excellent for sledding down stairs.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

43. Homeschool geometry

10 in 10 chance there are at least 14 Tupperware without lids or 14 extra lids. Either way, 0% likelihood it’s a one to one ratio.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

44. Roll Tide

Sorry Vols.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

45. The quarantine 15 (or 60)

But there are just so many snacks.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

46. Bobby Boucher

This education brought to you by day drinking.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

47. Dexter approved

And going into a bank with a bandana over your face is expected…

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

48. Apocalypse wear

Kinda samesies.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

49. Nemo knows

We’ve come so far… but seriously, now what?

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

50. Every remote employee

And yet we’ll keep doing it every day…

Stay safe, keep your sense of humor and wash your hands!

MIGHTY CULTURE

6 ways the Integrated Training Exercise feels like a video game

Marines love video games. It’s no secret that games like Battlefield had an influence on many of us as we decided to sign up in the first place. Slowly, you’ll come realize that life in the military is nothing like video games 99% of the time. But that still leaves that sweet, sweet 1% — which is experienced mostly during the Integrated Training Exercise.

When you’re at ITX, your battalion is put to the test to see if they can operate in combat environments. This is the thing that makes or breaks your unit. It’s what tells the Marine Corps that you’re ready to be sent on cool, important missions during deployment.

There’s a lot at stake when your unit arrives at Camp Wilson, make no mistake about that. It’s also some of the most fun you’ll have while training for a deployment. At times, the experience can feel like you’re in a video game. The types of things you do at ITX are the very reason you joined the infantry in the first place — to shoot guns and blow stuff up. This is Battlefield live.


The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Even some of the company assault ranges were pretty cool.

(U.S. Marine Corps photo by Lance Cpl. Samantha Schwoch)

You go on cool missions

Conducing helicopter-supported raids and clearing through a large town populated with both enemies and civilians sound like objectives out of latest Rainbow Six. Sure, not all of the exercises are this cool, but even video games have their dull levels.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

There’s not much to do there, either.

(U.S. Marine Corps photo by Cpl. Natalia Cuevas)

Camp Wilson is basically the game lobby

When playing a game online, between matches, you often get sent to a “lobby,” where you wait with other players and get prepared for the next mission. This is essentially the role of Camp Wilson: it’s a place you relax and get ready for the next event.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

You were lucky if you mostly rode in helicopters.

(U.S. Marine Corps photo by Lance Cpl. Samantha Schwoch)

You use vehicles to attack objectives

This isn’t the case for every mission but, for the most part, you’ll be taken to and from a staging area by vehicle to get as close as possible to your objective before you get out and attack. On the large assaults, you’ll be riding in Amphibious Assault Vehicles.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

The explosions are better in person.

U.S. Marine Corps photo by Lance Cpl. Samantha Schwoch)

You finally get to witness air strikes

Twentynine Palms offers a cool training experience for units undergoing ITX evaluation — you get the ability to use and witness air strikes. That’s right: We’re talking planes flying overhead and dropping bombs that you get to watch explode. And you thought calling in an airstrike in Call of Duty felt good?

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

They’re like mortars but, bigger.

(U.S. Marine Corps photo illustration by Sgt. Justin A. Bopp)

You have artillery support

In some games, you can call for artillery support. This probably wasn’t the case during a lot of your pre-deployment training cycles. You definitely get mortars, but watching a 155mm Howitzer drop warheads in the distance is amazing. Just like air strikes, these are even better in person.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

You’ll burn through more ammo than you thought you’d ever touch.

(U.S. Marine Corps photo by Cpl. Dallas Johnson)

You fire a lot of bullets

Video games give you a lot of ammunition and so will your unit at Twentynine Palms. You’re going to get everything you need for every mission you take on, and you might get more than you know what to do with. Hopefully your trigger finger is prepared for the cramp it’s going to experience.


MIGHTY CULTURE

5 reasons miniature wargaming beats a computer wargame

Okay, you just want to play the latest computer wargame. Well, it can be a blast, whether it’s a flight simulator (just don’t strafe the guys in chutes), a first-person shooter, or even just a simulation of a battle. But there are a bunch of wargames you’ve probably ignored.

Yeah, those miniatures rules. It seems antiquated in this day and age when you can immerse yourself into a game on your computer, but don’t knock those paper rules. In fact, just as cluster bombs have got JDAMs beat in under appreciated ways, miniatures rules have computer games beat in ways you may not appreciate. Let’s take a look.


The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

You don’t need a computer to have a good game going – just imagine a few sailors with some Harpoon or Advanced Squad Leader.

(U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 3rd Class Tarra Samoluk)

No tech needed

When your power is out, your laptop’s got a finite life. The more performance you want or need for that game, the faster the battery runs down. That is not an issue with miniatures rules. No tech needed. The most important specialty item: Dice — and those are not dependent on electricity.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Pizza and sodas with the buddies – a nice miniatures game can provide the perfect excuse for that, PCs, not so much.

(U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 3rd Class David N. Dexter)

You can throw a party

When you and your buddies get together to play a miniatures game, it can be a real nice party. Get some pizza, energy drinks, throw together some nachos. But you and your friends can have a few hours… or a whole weekend, for that matter. Just make sure you clean up afterwards.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Why is the cruiser USS Monterey (CG 61) firing? What will those two Burke-class destroyers do? You could create the scenario…

(U.S. Navy Photo by Chief Damage Controlman Andrae L. Johnson)

Easy to come up with new scenarios

You don’t need much to come up with your own scenarios for a miniatures game. Just a map (doesn’t even have to be real), something to represent the ships or units (either informal tokens, actual miniatures, or even pieces of paper), and you are set to go.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

It will be very easy to incorporate these changes into the miniature version of Harpoon.

(Photo by Harold Hutchison)

You can address variables

The author gets to brag here. In 2004, he asked Larry Bond, the designer of the Admiralty Trilogy wargames, a question about implementing kamikazes into Harpoon. It took a few e-mails, but an article soon detailed how to implement kamikazes into the main Harpoon 4 rule set. Try doing that with a computer game.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Okay, let’s spice up a Cold War scenario of a carrier versus two regiments of Backfires by giving the carrier the Valkyrie from Robotech…

(Harmony Gold)

Custom characters, weapons, or ships are no problem

If you have the blank form, you have the means to add a character, ship, or weapon to the game. Whether your own design, or something from pop culture, you can use it in a minis game. Harpoon has brilliantly done this by providing blank forms, notably for ships. Some computer wargames allow you to do that, but most don’t.

So, the next time someone disses you about liking miniature wargames, you can show them what’s what.

MIGHTY CULTURE

An NFL player and West Pointer reenlisted troops before the Cardinals-Rams game

In the hours before the Arizona Cardinals kicked off against the Los Angeles Rams, an even more special thing happened in the Cardinals’ end zone. Unfortunately for the Cardinals, it was only one of two events that took place in their end zone all night. Arizona fell to Los Angeles 31-9, but 45 U.S. troops were sworn in or reenlisted that night.


You win some, you lose some.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas
West Point NFL player conducts mass oath of enlistment ceremony

But wait a minute. According to 10 U.S. Code § 502, the oath has to be administered by a commissioned officer. So who is swearing in these kids and troops? That’s 1st Lt. Brett Toth, who is a beneficiary of the recent rule changes to service academy athletes. Toth’s military service requirement was deferred in order to play offensive tackle for the Arizona Cardinals while he was in prime physical condition. Toth is a graduate of the United States Military Academy at West Point and a former player for the Army Black Knights football team. He played in two of Army’s most recent wins over Navy.

The group of 45 future soldiers and Marines gathered in front of him before the game’s kickoff were recruits from the Phoenix Recruiting Battalion and was part of the local Salute to Service celebration within the Cardinals franchise. The Cardinals, former home of a deceased Army ranger and former Cardinal Pat Tillman, are very excited to celebrate Salute to Service every November. It doesn’t hurt to have an actual lieutenant on hand, either.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

(U.S. Army photo by Alun Thomas)

As Toth, who is currently on the team’s disabled list, led the mass Oath of Enlistment, the crowd began to cheer wildly. After taking the oath, the 45 newly-christened U.S. troops were able to stay for the game. When the Cardinals took the field, the first people out of the locker room were Capt. Edward Donaghue, commander of the Phoenix Recruiting Battalion, and Staff Sgt. Gregory Hunter, one of the battalion’s recruiters.

Though the game started on a very high note for the Cardinals players and for America’s newest troops, it didn’t take long to turn for the worst. The Cardinals were soundly defeated in a 31-9 loss to the Rams.

popular

6 reasons why an Afghanistan deployment is just like ‘Star Wars’

There aren’t any real ways to describe what Afghanistan was like to civilians. Life on deployment is just so bizarre that the only thing you can do is compare it to something else.

You could say that it’s a blisteringly hot desert with creepy-ass bugs that’s peppered with some assholes who want us dead, but a more telling analogy would be to compare it to Star Wars‘ desert planet of Tatooine.


The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

But you might find something that someone else might find interesting. Won’t be you though.

(Photo by photo by Senior Airman Jessica Lockoski)

Constantly looking around for nothing

There are moments on deployment when things get intense. That’s not up for debate. But there is a significant difference between the number of troops who’ve been deployed and the number of troops who’ve seen actual combat. For the most part, patrols come back having received nothing more than a few glares from the locals.

You might have one of the few grunts who was constantly on-mission for duration of your deployment, but for the other 99.99 percent of us, there’s a lot of nothing going around.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

…during which, you guessed it, nothing will happen again.

(Photo by Sgt. Steven Quinata)

Nothing to do if you’re on an outlaying FOB

Even when troops get back to the FOB — surprise! — there’s still nothing going on.

The two-thirds of the “Fobbits” who didn’t join you have nothing interesting to talk about and you’re just twiddling your thumbs waiting until the next time you can go out on patrol.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Chances are, you’re not going to find a droid with an encoded message from a princess, so just enjoy your recording of a movie that came out three years ago.

(Photo by Staff Sgt. David Carbajal)

The locals sell old hand-me-downs

Despite popular civilian belief, you actually can snag some solid quality-of-life things from the local bazaars.

But it’s never anything actually useful — unless you’re interested in a collection of ripped DVDs of some 90s sitcom. It’s like the old hunk-of-junk droids that Luke buys. I mean, yeah, they kick off the Hero’s Journey for Luke, but everyone else who buys that crap is probably going to hawk it off to the next guy.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Definitely smells about the same…

(Photo by Sgt. 1st Class Erick Studenicka)

The main airfields were just weird

At first glance, Kandahar Airfield sounds like a Mos Eisley-esque, wretched hive of scum and villainy. Many years ago, that may have been true, but now it’s just… odd.

Everyone from all the NATO nations are headquartered there and with that diversity comes an odd mixture of cultural identities. Everyone seems so happy for no reason, despite there being a literal pond full of sh*t just downwind.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

Both aren’t known for their spectacular aim, either.

(Courtesy Photo)

The terrorists are basically the Tusken Raiders

Terrorists are aggressive and attack when you least expect them to. Once, there was a time when they were feared for their ability in battle.

Truth is, they’re garbage and get wasted pretty fast whenever they show their faces.

The Legion was always doomed in Fallout: New Vegas

It’s hard to differentiate the two sometimes. They’re usually the only fat people people in a war-torn and impoverished nation, but no one ever says anything about it…

(Photo by Sgt. Tracy Smith)

The warlords are basically Jabba the Hutt

The Afghan leadership thinks they have control over the warlords, but they really don’t. No one wants to call them out for their criminal enterprises; it’s not a fight anyone is willing to take.

Accepting that you have to pay off the Hutts to get things done is the norm on Tatooine. It’s basically the same in Afghanistan.

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