This 'Jack Ryan' and 'The Office' cut is the funniest thing you'll see this weekend - We Are The Mighty
MIGHTY MOVIES

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

Amazon Prime is pushing their new show, Jack Ryan, based on the Tom Clancy character that has saved Britain’s queen, hunted Russian subs, and interrupted terrorist plots across the world in both novels and movies from the ’80s to today.

The character is a mainstay of the the thriller world — an American James Bond — which is why it’s so great that Amazon cast comedy icon John Krasinski in the role.


Now, Funny or Die has done what we’ve all been thinking — they cut together the Jack Ryan commercial and scenes from The Office, pitting America’s top analyst-turned-spy against the criminal genius of Dwight Schrute, the socially awkward and pretentious beet farmer who’s always hatching some failed scheme to teach his office mates a moral lesson.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

Jim (left) feigns working at his desk as Dwight (center) looks at what he believes to be a gift-wrapped desk. Spoiler: The desk is actually gone completely. Jim made a fake frame for the wrapping and the whole thing collapses when Dwight tries to sit down.

(YouTube/The Office US)

Dwight is best known by his self-appointed job title: Assistant to the Regional Manager. Abbreviated, of course, as the Ass. Man.

He labors for years to outmaneuver Jim Halpert, now Jim Ryan, in a series of escalating pranks, from disappearing desks to fake spy taps to false faxes from the future. Apparently, Dwight is not putting up with it any longer.

Check out the hilarious video mashup below and get a look at more sinister Dwight Schrute.

www.youtube.com

Jack Ryan debuted August 31, but has already been been renewed for a second season. In the first season, Ryan notices irregularities in bank transactions and eventually finds evidence of a growing terrorist threat against the U.S., leading him across the world in a quest to hunt down the leaders and prevent the attack.

The show brings Michael Bay and John Krasinski back together. The men had previously worked together on 13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers of Benghazi, a dramatization of the horrible events at the U.S. embassy in Libya in 2012. 13 Hours was probably the most well-known example of Krasinski’s pivot from comedy to action.

After years of playing Jim Halpert in The Office and performing other comedic roles, Krasinski has been branching out, directing movies and focusing on action roles.

MIGHTY HISTORY

The ‘terrorist uniform’ you’ll probably wear this winter

Plaid fabric is fairly innocuous. It’s been borrowed by all sorts of groups in America, from hipsters to lumberjacks and punk rockers to professors.

But, in the 18th century, it was the semi-official uniform of Scottish rebels branded as terrorists by the Protestant King George II.


This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

King James II and his wife, Anne, before they were violently deposed and forced to flee to France and exile.

The problems started in 1688 when Catholic King James II was overthrown by a Protestant rebellion. In his absence, who, exactly, would be the legal holder of power in England was thrown up for debate. Would the Catholic king, who had cast away the Seal of the Realm while fleeing to France, or the Protestant William III and his wife, Mary, be the true authority of England?

Different political bodies in England and in other European capitols came down on different sides of the debate, but Mary was crowned queen and her husband became king. But the descendants of James II maintained their claim to the throne in exile. In 1745, James II’s grandson, Charles, made a play for the throne.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

“Bonnie Prince Charlie,” the world’s hardest pandering claimant to the English throne in 1745.

(John Pettie)

Boasting Scottish blood, Charles decided to start his campaign in Scotland in 1745. The Parliament of Scotland had initially acquiesced to the rise of Queen Mary and King William III, but the Scottish, as a whole, still supported Catholic rule. And Scotland had been angered by a series of acts by London and the Crown during the early 1700s, including the dissolution of the Parliament of Scotland.

To cement his political standing with the Scots, Charles arrived in the country in a plaid coat. Plaid patterns in Scotland are known as tartans, and they had been a popular part of Scottish identity for centuries.

The ploy worked, and many Scots, especially Highland Scots, decided to support the invasion, creating the Jacobites, as they were known. But, some Lowland Scots supported Mary and William, leading to fighting in Scotland even before Charles began his push south.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

Soldiers of a Highland Regiment just before the Jacobite uprising. After the uprising, soldiers serving the British crown could continue to wear patterns like this, but it was banned for nearly all others.

The Highland Scots, often wearing their traditional garb made with tartan fabrics, delivered a number of victories to “Bonnie Prince Charlie” (Think Braveheart clothing but The Patriot weapons).

But popular support for Charles and the House of Stuart dried up the further the Jacobites marched south, and so they were soon forced to start pulling back north with his largely Scottish forces.

This led to the Battle of Culloden in April, 1746, where Charles and the Scots attempted to score a defensive victory against government forces led by the Duke of Cumberland. Both sides were bogged down in the mud, but greater numbers on the Protestant side allowed them to pin down Scottish fighters with some units while others maneuvered. Their artillery advantage played a large role, as well.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

Battle of Culloden, where a Jacobite uprising supporting a Catholic claim to the British throne was ended by government forces.

(David Morier)

But the real brilliance of the Protestant attack came in how they ordered men to attack with bayonets during hand-to-hand fighting. Rather than fencing with the man directly in front of them, as was normal, the men were ordered to thrust into the exposed right side of the enemy adjacent to them.

Charles fled the country, never to return. But the Scots he left behind found themselves in the unenviable position of being stuck in the kingdom they had just rebelled against.

They were branded as terrorists and insurgents, and many of those who took part in the rebellion were hunted and executed. Meanwhile, their traditional fabric had been outlawed for general wear. Only highlanders who joined the British military were allowed to wear tartan fabrics, and usually only in Scottish units.

The ban was lifted in 1782, but by then, many of the traditional patterns had been lost and weavers had died. Still, it slowly grew in popularity once again.

Oddly enough, its popularity had greatly grown among Lowland Scots who had fought against their tartan-wearing brethren. They collected tartan patterns like souvenirs of their fathers’ victories over the Catholics.

Finally, the Protestant aristocracy embraced the pattern after King George IV visited Edinburgh and led a tartan procession of Highland chiefs through the Scottish city.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

Now, of course, its popular around the world, but known as plaid in the States. Scottish clans reclaimed their historic patterns or generated new ones that would be tied to families forever. It’s no longer the fabric of a military rebellion. It’s just a cool pattern, often woven of warm cloths, like flannel.

In fact, the rebellious nature of the pattern has been so degraded that one of the most recognizable and broadly used tartan patterns is that of the the Royal House of Stewart, the royal family of England which defeated the 1745-1746 Jacobite Rebellion and then outlawed the fabric for almost 40 years. Oddly enough, it’s very similar to the “Jacobite” pattern worn by the rebels.

So, enjoy your flannel, but maybe tip a Scotch whisky over for the tartan-wearing warriors in the sky while you do so.

Humor

6 things only a lower enlisted can get away with

Rank has its privilege. It goes far beyond just getting a slight bump in pay that finally puts your base pay above minimum wage.


As a lower enlisted, if you mess up, you’ll get smoked — or at least get a talking-to. Once you become an NCO or an officer, your ass is grass if you act like a young Private (there’s some leeway for butterbars, but not much). Be warned, young lower enlisted with your eyes on the prized NCO rank: There’s a line in the sand. Once you enter the NCO Corps, you can no longer do any of the following.

6. Shaming / skating

Don’t expect much downtime as a junior NCO — training meeting over here, command and staff meeting over there. There’ll be a lot of dog and pony shows between the moments you need to actually do your freaking job.

There’s literally no time to sit on your phone and ask the daily, “why haven’t they cut us lose yet?”

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
Of course I’m at the layout… (U.S. Air National Guard photo by Master Sgt. Mike R. Smith)

5. Mistakes out of ignorance

Young Privates botch setting up a radio and no one bats an eye. A Sergeant messes up with that same radio and someone is on their ass about why they didn’t take the time to download all the manuals in their free time to learn a piece of equipment that was just fielded.

Lower enlisted learn things as they progress, so mistakes are common. Senior NCOs can rely on other people to know how to do it, so mistakes are rare. As for junior NCOs… you’re on your own.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
Let’s see… it need batteries, a hand mic, and an antenna thingy… (U.S. Marine Corps Photo by Sgt. Alex Kouns)

4. Failing to meet standards (even just barely)

Standards are there for a reason. If a private just barely misses their run time or just barely misses weapons qualification, it’s not the end of the world even if it seems like it is. Their NCO should help get them back up to the standard and things are good again. No harm, no foul, and everyone looks good.

The subordinate looks good because they improved even though it’s just to the standard. The NCO looks good because they helped nudge them to where they were supposed to be.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
Can’t tell if the Command Chief Master Sergeant is offering a hand or knifehanding the airman. Either way, motivation! (U.S. Air Force photo by Master Sgt. CT Michael)

3. Doing dumb sh*t with your free time

Depending on your unit and immediate chain of command, team-building exercises off duty, like when your entire squad goes out to get smashed after payday, is the norm. If you’re a Private, go nuts! Enjoy your time. NCOs and officers usually attend to see what their troops are really like, and it’s worth it even if they have to play the sober babysitter.

Even when the boots finally come off, an NCO’s job isn’t done. If you can manage to do something other than make up the work you couldn’t get to earlier in the day (meaning filling out bullsh*t paperwork, reading useless manuals, and getting ready for the next day), it doesn’t matter — someone f*cked up! Even if you’ve just met the kid and haven’t drilled into them how your unit operates, you’re in trouble with them. Never a day off.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
Ever wonder why there’s always one NCO at every barracks party? (Screengrab via YouTube)

2. Complaining in general

No one likes hearing complaining about minor things. If a Private is told, “suck it up, buttercup,” then that’s the end of the conversation. Plenty of things suck, and it’s not like crying will make things better. Best of all, no one cares if a lower enlisted complains. Things get better or they suck it up.

If an NCO or an officer whines that it’s too hot, everyone from the lowly Private to the full-bird Colonel laughs at the pansy. Complaining about mundane crap will destroy a hard-ass reputation and open the floodgates for their subordinates to keep b*tching.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
Even if things do suck, it’s just a drop in the bucket of all the dumb sh*t that’s ever happened in the military. (U.S. Air Force photo by Airman 1st Class Jonathon D. A. Carnell)

1. Being protected from the sh*t rolling downhill

This one depends on if you’re a good NCO/Officer. A good leader stands in front of that incoming sh*t-boulder rolling at their troops and tries to keep them out of the suck as much as possible. If it splashes, that’s fine. If a leader throws their troop under said boulder, they don’t deserve to be called a leader.

Let’s say, for example, a Private is driving a Humvee and rear ends the Brigade Commander’s personal car. The Brigade Commander will want their head on a spike. Each leader along the way has the choice to talk the previous link on the chain of command out of decapitating an idiot and displaying their severed head for an honest mistake.

Eventually, this particular boulder rolls into the first-line supervisor. Any leader worth their rank would pull an excuse out of their ass as to why it was actually not the private’s fault, but their own. If getting smoked until they’re sore is the only consequence, that Private has a damn good leader.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
But it’s all worth it to knifehand a motherf*cker. (Image via Imgur)

MIGHTY TRENDING

Top US general wants more firepower to counter Russia

The top US general in Europe told Congress March 5, 2019, that he needs a lot more firepower to counter the threat from Russia.

“I am not comfortable yet with the deterrent posture that we have in Europe,” Gen. Curtis Scaparrotti, head of European Command and NATO’s supreme allied commander Europe, told the Senate Armed Services Committee, Stars and Stripes reported.

“While the US maintains a global military superiority over Russia, evolving Russian capabilities threaten to erode our competitive military advantage,” he explained. He told lawmakers there continue to be shortfalls across all warfighting domains.


He requested more troops and warships, as well as more cyber assets and more intelligence, surveillance, and reconnaissance assets to confront Russia, which boldly seized Crimea from Ukraine in 2014 and is rapidly modernizing its armed forces to “erode” the US military’s advantage.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

Gen. Curtis Scaparrotti, head of European Command and NATO’s supreme allied commander Europe.

“In light of Russia’s modernizing and increasingly aggressive force posture,” the general explained, “EUCOM recommends augmenting our assigned and rotational forces to enhance our deterrence posture.” He added that he has requested the addition of two more US Navy destroyers to bolster strength of the four ballistic-missile defense capable ships already stationed in Spain.

“I’ve asked for two more destroyers for EUCOM,” he said, according to CNN. “We need greater capacity particularly given the modernization and growth of the … Russian fleets in Europe.” He said that he would like to see carrier and amphibious strike groups rotating through Europe more frequently.

He also encouraged regular naval activities in the Black Sea. “They frankly don’t like us in the Black Sea,” the general said. “It’s international waters and we should sail and fly there.” As is, the US routinely sends destroyers into the waterway, where they are shadowed by Russian vessels.

Russia is in the process of bolstering the strength of its forces on NATO’s doorstep, adding new tank and missile units to its Baltic forces.

Russia argues that its actions are a direct response to NATO’s military build-up. “We are forced to provide an adequate response, carrying out strategic containment events with the plans of stepping up combat capabilities of military formations and units,” Defense Minister Sergei Shoigu recently told Russian state media.

Sen. Jim Inhofe, a Republican from Oklahoma and the chairman of the Senate Armed Services Committee, argued for greater deterrence capabilities March 5, 2019, according to Stars and Stripes, stating that any “perceived weakness will only provoke further aggression from Putin.”

This article originally appeared on Business Insider. Follow @BusinessInsider on Twitter.

MIGHTY TRENDING

Pentagon announces 2019 pay rates for active, reserve components

The Defense Department has released the active-duty and reserve drill pay tables for 2019.

Most military members will see a 2.6 percent increase in their base pay for 2019. Allowances, such as Basic Allowance for Housing (BAH), will also see an increase in 2019.

The raise will go into effect Jan. 1, 2019, for most military members. Military retirees also will see an increase in 2019.

Service members should see the 2.6 percent raise in their first January 2019 paycheck, typically January 15 for active-duty service members, and the payday following their first “drill weekend” for Guard and reservists.


The current partial government shutdown won’t affect most military members, since the DoD is funded for 2019. However, Coast Guard members may see their pay, along with any raises, delayed, since they operate under the Department of Homeland Security. That department did not have its 2019 funding approved before the government went into partial shutdown as Congress departed the capital for its holiday break.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
(Photo by Martin Falbisoner)

Check out the 2019 pay charts here.

Factors that affect military pay

  • The annual pay raise
  • Longevity raises virtually every 2 years (based on the number of years in service)
  • Promotions
  • Number of Drill Periods (Guard and Reserve Only)
  • Basic Allowance for Housing Increases: BAH (based on location).
  • Basic Allowance for Subsistence Increases: BAS
  • Special Pay(s) (based on occupations: Language Skills, Combat, Flight, Hazardous Duty).

Keep up with military pay updates

Military pay benefits are changing all the time. Make sure you’re up to date with everything you’ve earned. Join Military.com for free to receive updates on all your military benefits, delivered directly to your inbox.

This article originally appeared on Military.com. Follow @militarydotcom on Twitter.

MIGHTY CULTURE

Best outdoor veteran groups by region

Once hardcore, always hardcore. The military crowd loves to mock civilian life for its snail pace and seemingly mundane existence. There’s nothing to blow up, no surge of adrenaline post jump, and no unit to show up to or for. Post military life can suck, but there’s definitely something to be done about it.


Quit reminiscing about the good ole days and start living again through these veteran groups made for rebels. Listed by region and spanning across several categories of sports, there are zero excuses to miss out.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

winnebagolife.com

East – Warrior Expeditions

Become hiker trash – you’re in good company. World War II veteran Earl Schaffer was the first person to walk the entire Appalachian Trail in an effort to “walk off the war” according to his trail diary. The Appalachian Trail is just one of many long-term expeditions open to combat veterans by Warrior Expeditions, a nonprofit which provides 100 percent of gear, supplies and clothing to complete the mission.

Longer expeditions revisit the endurance and disconnection experienced while serving. Getting back to “the suck” is the forging you forgot you needed. Hike, bike or paddle knowing your focus can remain on the mission rather than the budget.

Other treks to consider are the Mississippi River paddle and Florida Trail. Nothing says grit like bunking next to gators and living to tell about it. Fill out the application and see where it’ll take you.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

West — Operation Surf

Losing control is gaining control over the only thing you can- yourself. That’s the gist behind this next adventure with Operation Surf. Boasting both a weeklong or six-month option, this is a culture to tap into.

Operation Surf is all about overcoming. Physical or mental barriers are washed away, leaving veterans feeling capable, confident, and badass again. Waiting on waves teaches patience, falling until you stand- endurance and the high of riding towards the support waiting in the water and the shore is an experience like no other.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

media.defense.gov

Nation Wide – IRONMAN Gold Star initiative

“I will run for you” is the concept behind this subgroup within the elite IRONMAN community. During the run portion of the IRONMAN race, veteran or active duty service members can opt to carry an American flag to give to Gold Star Families waiting at the finish line.

In 2020, eight races are eligible for this program in cities spanning across the nation. What we love is the double layer of camaraderie this provides. It’s training for one of the hardest endurance races, becoming a part of a tight-knit and hyper-focused group, and then finding the few within your new niche who are more like you than you knew.

The discipline necessary to complete IRONMAN races will resemble the rigidness of military life, comfort in disguise. Achieving a status, a pace of life, or simply a feat that most of us can’t, reminds you to rise again to become what you forgot you could be.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

North or South – Outward Bound for Veterans

Small group encounters high stakes scenarios. That’s the environment Outward Bound looks to replicate for veterans within their programs. Overcoming something within a small group aims to bond, reset and refuel themselves amongst other veterans.

From a six-day boundary waters excursion complete with dog sledding to kayaking through the mangroves in Florida, there’s plenty of notable treks to be had. Most excursions are six days in length and zero dollars in cost. Take a look at their interactive map to hike, sail, or snowshoe into a new hobby.

This list is a small percent of the many options, programs, or nonprofits all working to close the gap between service and solid new foundations. Nothing can replicate the experiences, good or bad while serving in the military. The best outdoor group for you is ultimately the one you join.

popular

6 awesome Army jobs that no longer exist

Go to an Army career counselor or recruiter and he has all sorts of cool jobs you can sign up for. Soldiers network satellites, engage in hacking wars, and shoot awesome weapons at targets and enemies.


It’s like your childhood video games, fireworks, and backyard games all got awesome upgrades and now you can get paid for it.

But some of the Army’s best jobs are actually in the past, like those that allowed people to get intimately acquainted with tactical nuclear weapons or fire awesome Gatling guns. So here are six of those badass jobs Pvt. Skippy can’t do in the Army anymore:

1. Nuclear weapons basic maintenance specialist

 

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
(Screenshot: Navy historical documents)

Yeah, the Army used to have a nuclear weapons program and it employed a group of men with a whole three weeks of training to disassemble and repair those weapons.

Not a typo. Three weeks. And the first week was weapons familiarization “taught at the high school level” (not sure what the high school level of nuclear weapons training is).

2. Aeroscout observer

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
(Photo: U.S. Army)

Back in Vietnam, the Army had people whose sole job was to ride in scout helicopters and help spot targets on the ground while assigned directly to the maneuver forces they were supporting. Aeroscout observers worked with — who else — aeroscout pilots who were also assigned to the ground unit. Eventually, this gave way to pilot/co-pilot teams on OH-58 Kiowa scout helicopters.

Now, even that is falling to the history books. The Army’s active component has retired the last of its dedicated scout helicopters to the boneyards and National Guard in favor of attack helicopters with direct drone control.

3. Army motorcycle riders

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
U.S. Army Cpl. Gordon C. Powell poses with British Dispatch Rider Baltins Dougoughs on Aug. 27, 1944. (Photo: U.S. Army)

Riding a motorcycle in combat sounds exciting no matter what the job is, from carrying messages to scouting enemy forces. But in World War I, the tank corps included a group of “motorcycle men” whose primary gig was delivering repair parts and replacement crewmembers to tanks under fire.

For obvious reasons, tank-delivery motorcycle riders were re-classed after the Army figured out how to use tanks to recover one another. (If it’s not obvious, it because repair personnel protected by literal tons of armor are safer than those riding motorcycles and protected by only their uniforms).

4. Heavy Anti-Armor Infantryman

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
(Photo: U.S. Army)

While the Marine Corps still fields Antitank Missile Gunners under the military occupational specialty 0352, the Army got rid of its 11H Heavy Anti-Armor Weapons Infantrymen. These guys did exactly what their title says; They used heavy weapons to hunt down enemy armor. Nowadays, this capability is handled by general infantrymen assigned to the weapons company.

5. Morse Interceptor

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
(Photo: U.S. Army Signal Corps)

 

Full disclosure, there are a few different signal intelligence jobs that could have been included in this list. Most of them have been folded into other specialties or been quietly terminated as their own job because the march of technology has made them unnecessary. After all, how much Morse intelligence is there to collect anymore?

The reason that Morse interceptor was selected for the list is that it’s the only one of these lost signal intelligence jobs that was once held by Johnny Cash. Cash did the job in the Air Force, not the Army, but still.

6. Chapparal/Vulcan Crewmember

The Chapparal and Vulcan were M113 armored vehicles equipped with anti-aircraft weapons. The Vulcan packed a six-barrel Gatling gun that could be deployed separately from the M113 when necessary, while the Chapparal carried AIM-9 Sidewinder missiles. While the Chapparal role was largely replaced with the Army Avenger program, no direct descendant of the Vulcan exists.

While the Vulcan was largely outdated for anti-aircraft operations, the Army gave up a great ground weapon when it lost the Gatling gun. Vulcan crew members could fire 20mm rounds at up to 6,600 rounds per minute, targeting low-flying aircraft or enemy infantry and vehicles.

MIGHTY TACTICAL

These insane robot machine guns guard the Korean DMZ

The Korean Demilitarized Zone is probably the most watched, most ironically named 250 kilometers found anywhere in the world. Despite the unprecedented brutality of the Korean War and the sporadic violence between the two, people still routinely try to get through the DMZ, often even going the hard way – going right through the most heavily defended strip of land in the world.


Commando raids, spies, and even axe murderers have all tried to cross the DMZ in some way. In just 25 years after the Korean Armistice was signed, more than 200 incursion attempts were made across the area. There had to be a better way.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

This is how they did it in 1969. Surely by 2019, we could do better.

Enter Samsung, the South Korean multinational conglomerate best known for making exploding mobile phones, which makes so many other products. They have an aerospace division, as well as divisions to make textiles, chemicals, and even automated sentry guns that kill the hell out of anyone who doesn’t know the password – the Samsung SGR-A1.

The defense system is a highly-classified, first-of-its-kind unit that incorporates surveillance, tracking, firing, and voice recognition technology to keep the humans in South Korea’s military free to operate elsewhere while still being massively outnumbered.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

Gun-toting death robots is the perfect solution.

While other sentry guns have been developed and deployed elsewhere, this is the grand stage. The Korean Peninsula is the Carnegie Hall of weapons testing, where chances are good the weapon will likely get used in an operational capacity sooner rather than later. Failure is not an option. That’s why each 0,000 sentry gun comes equipped with a laser rangefinder, thermographic camera, IR illuminator, a K3 LMG machine gun with 1,000 rounds of ammo, and a Mikor MGL 40mm multiple grenade launcher that doesn’t give a damn about the ethical issues surrounding autonomous killing machines.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

If this thing had legs, it would be a Terminator-Predator hybrid.

The only controversy surrounding these weapons, now deployed in the DMZ, is whether or not they truly need a human in the loop to do their job. The system could conceivably be automated to kill or capture anyone who happened upon them in the area, regardless of their affiliation. To the robot, if you’re in the DMZ for any reason, you are the enemy. And you must be stopped.

“Human soldiers can easily fall asleep or allow for the depreciation of their concentration over time,” Huh Kwang-hak, a spokesman for Samsung Techwin, told Stars and Stripes. “But these robots have automatic surveillance, which doesn’t leave room for anything resembling human laziness. They also won’t have any fear (of) enemy attackers on the front lines.”

MIGHTY TACTICAL

India’s hypersonic missile packs a devastating punch

To some, the rise of India as a modern military power is a little surprising. The country that gave the world Mahatma Gandhi and his teachings of nonviolence has arguably built up the second-most-powerful military in Asia.


One of the reasons India arguably ranks so highly is the fact that they’ve developed a number of weapons, either completely on their own or in cooperation with other nations. One of India’s closest partners in development is Russia.

At the end of the Cold War, Russia’s economy was in the dumps. India, meanwhile, was looking to modernize. The two countries came up with an exchange: India would help finance development and, in return, received access to modern weapons at what turned out to be bargain-basement prices. One of those weapons was the BrahMos cruise missile.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
The BrahMos was based on the Russian SS-N-26 Sapless supersonic cruise missile. (Wikimedia Commons photo by Jno)

Related: The 25 most powerful militaries in the world 2018

The BrahMos is a variant of the SS-N-26 Sapless cruise missile (also known as the P-800 Oniks) used by the Russian Navy. The BrahMos, like the Sapless, can be launched from ships, submarines, or land bases. It packs a 661-pound warhead, has a maximum range of 180 miles, and is capable of operating as a “sea-skimmer,” flying within 50 feet of the surface of the ocean. It has a top speed of Mach 3.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
Three regiments of the Indian Army are equipped with truck-launched BrahMos cruise missiles. (Wikimedia Commons photo by Hemantphoto79)

In short, this is a missile that can go unseen until it’s very close, at which point you have very little time to react. According to an official website for the missile, the BrahMos is operated on Indian Navy ships and by three Indian Army regiments. The Indian Air Force is also testing the Brahmos for its force of Su-30 MKI Flankers, giving them more options for deploying this devastating ordnance.

Learn more about this Mach 3 missile in the video below!

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZXNSZdbUWDc
MIGHTY TRENDING

Survey says we need civilians to rally around our military families

The 2019 Blue Star Families lifestyle survey just dropped, and according to the results, most of us shouldn’t be shocked. With numbers well into 40 or 50 percent feeling the effects of displacement and isolation across several categories, you’re not the only one thinking there’s no one to ask a favor of. Why are we staying silent with our struggles? What is stopping us from living this life to the fullest?


Examining the “why” behind the results is what we’re after here. Lighting the path forward, one foot in front of the other is how change takes place. Whether you have something to give, or in the season of receiving, this is a fight you can help win.

Of over 11,000 survey participants, 40 percent feel they don’t belong within the local community, and 47 percent feel the local community lacks in understanding, support, respect or appreciation. Let’s take these connected issues one layer at a time.

Where do military families “belong?” Examining the physical geography of our “where” is one indicator as to why a separation of town and base is palpable. Life within guarded gates has a purpose, but it’s vital that we all absorb the mindset of becoming the area’s “newest locals” seriously. When the community participates exclusively in life inside the gates, our cultures, our talents, and our connections fail to dissipate into the local community. We become invisible citizens.

Everything from work to happy childhoods to wringing every drop of opportunity a nomadic life has to offer hinges on our ability to acclimate and do it well. When we become less determined to replicate the same life repeatedly, and more open to new experiences or chapters, it becomes much easier to find a place to be.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

“I jump right into a routine, it’s awkward at first, but is a must for my sanity, this is the brave part of living this life,” says Laurie Boarts, Army spouse laying roots even with a short 14-month assignment.

39 percent of participants feel as if they have no one to talk to.

The military world is incredibly connected-virtually. Face to face connection is dying a slow death in all generations following the “boomers” making this issue something civilians and military have in common.

Making new friends (as an adult), trying new things, and putting yourself out there are all high-ranking fears for anyone. Yet, they are all critical components of a successful military life.

“I don’t expect the local community to understand the nuances of military life, I just focus on being myself and communicating openly,” says Boarts, who utilizes her busy schedule as a mom to find common ground in the crowd.

Is your calendar full of new local groups to try out? Have you walked into your kid’s first hockey practice openly admitting you have no idea where all those pads go and laughingly asked for help? The results of this survey gave us something to rely on- the person next to you is likely looking for a friend…so say hello. If collectively, every military community member decided they were fed up with not knowing their “neighbor,” we’d all be better for it.

63 percent within this community are experiencing stress due to finances.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

Life is expensive, and with over 77 percent of spouses stating they are underemployed in salary, hours or employment in general, it’s no wonder why we feel the squeeze. There is, however, one perk that a free work calendar does allow for- participating in the community.

Did we just go full circle? Yes, we did. Tired of cooking meals but don’t have the budget for a restaurant? Invite your neighbors, or those lonely eyed acquaintances from library storytime over for a potluck barbeque on Saturday. Not only is a fruit platter less than a steak dinner, but it’s also real-life humans to talk to, to check in with and bond over the results of this survey with.

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Watch this special operator lead a ship assault with a jetpack like Iron Man

From James Bond to Tony Stark, fictitious characters have inspired the idea of jetpacks and personal flying suits for decades. The technology has progressed exponentially in the 21st century. Defense departments and contractors around the world are developing personal transportation equipment to give individual soldiers an unprecedented increase in maneuverability on the battlefield.

Gravity Industries partnered with the Netherlands Maritime Special Operations Force in a practical test of its new Gravity Jet Suit. Using 1050bhp of thrust, the suit enables the assaulter to easily and precisely board an underway ship from the air. Normally, troops have to pull alongside in a boat or fast-rope from a helicopter. Four mini jet engines and a healthy dose of human balance from the operator allow for an incredible combination of speed and control. In fact, the system won Gravity a 2019 Guinness World Record for “fastest speed in a body controlled jet engine powered suit.”

As the technology develops and improves, so too does the application of the jetpack on the battlefield. In addition to underway boardings, jetpacks could provide enhanced capabilities to a number of different combat roles. Scouts could move quickly across the battlefield to locate and report on enemy troop composition and disposition. Airborne troops could be inserted with greater precision and survivability by flying onto a drop zone rather than falling. As with other military technologies like the internet and GPS, it would only be a matter of time before jetpacks became part of everyday civilian life too.

MIGHTY CULTURE

That time when Green Berets who avenged 9/11 on horseback recreated this legendary WWII jump

Before D-Day, on June 5, 1944, some 90 teams of two to four men parachuted into Nazi-occupied France. They were members of the Office of Strategic Services, the predecessors of both the CIA and the modern-day Army Special Forces. These OSS teams were called “Jedburgh” teams and were highly skilled in European languages, parachuting, amphibious operations, skiing, mountain climbing, radio operations, Morse code, small arms, navigation, hand-to-hand combat, explosives, and espionage. They would need all of it.

The OSS teams’ job was to link up with resistance fighters in France, Belgium, and the Netherlands to coordinate Allied airdrops, conduct sabotage operations, and roll out the red carpet for the Allied advance into Germany. D-Day was to be the “Jeds'” trial by fire.


This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

The Jedburghs preparing to jump before D-Day.

Fast forward to 75 years later: Europe is no longer a fortress and the OSS has since evolved into both the CIA and the US Army’s Special Forces. To honor that tradition, a team of Army Special Forces veterans, including SOF legend and 2017 Bull Simons Award Winner CSM Rick Lamb, are planning to recreate the Jedburghs’ famous nighttime jumps into Europe in June 2019 and those veterans just happen to be members of the ODA that rode into Afghanistan on horseback in the days following the 9/11 attacks — they are Team American Freedom.

If the name “American Freedom” sounds familiar, it’s because they’re also the founders of American Freedom Distillery, a Florida-based premium spirits brand, makers of Horse Soldier Bourbon and Rekker Rum. And it’s not only the Special Forces veterans jumping from the lead aircraft on June 5th, they’re in good company. Joining them in the jump will be retired Army Ranger Bill Dunham, who lost a leg in Panama in 1989, the Gold Star mother of another Army Ranger and some of her late son’s fellow Rangers, and a 97-year-old World War II veteran.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

The American Freedom Distillery Team

“This group will represent every major known and unknown conflict for the past 30 years – every group who inserted early and fought with little recognition,” says American Freedom co-founder and Special Forces vet Scott Neill. “This is the last big World War II anniversary (other than VJ Day) that World War II vets and these generation will share. The very special part is that we will also share this with our families. Our wives who took care of the home front and our kids who watched daddy go away again and again. It’s a way to show our family why we did it.”

For the entire summer of 2019, France and England will be celebrating the D-Day landings and the start of the liberation of Europe. The D-Day airdrop is just the beginning, other events will include parades, military encampments, and showcases featuring World War II uniforms.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

Good work if you can get it.

The team is set to stage out of Cherbourg, France and tour some of the areas where the most intense fighting occurred. On June 5th, they will jump out of a C-47 Skytrain, just like their forebears did 75 years ago, and hit the dropzone at around 11a.m. They won’t be coming empty-handed. They will also be dropping a barrel of their Horse Soldier Bourbon to support the festivities on the ground as 200 more jumpers hit the drop zone throughout the day.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

(Image courtesy of Scott Neil, American Freedom Distillery)

If you want to support Team American Freedom as they remember the brave men who landed behind enemy lines a full day before the Allied invasion of Europe, you can help by contributing to their GoFundMe page. You will be enabling generations of special operators, CIA veterans, and Gold Star Families, many of who have lead insertions into modern day areas of operations attend this historic event.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend
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The 7 funniest Yelp reviews for military bases

Yelp is a great resource for finding a great restaurant or tourist destination, but it also features reviews from the military community of bases — and some of them are pretty hilarious.


Not every base is on Yelp and not every review is funny, but we looked at some that were and rounded up the ones that made us smile. Here they are (lightly edited for clarity):

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

Edwards Air Force Base, Edwards, Calif.

“Do you like dirt? If so, then this is the place for you! Have trouble finding your house already? Well make 20x harder because everything looks exactly alike! Enjoy loud noises and constant rumbling? Then Edwards is the place for you!” —Blake H.

Fort Hood, Killeen, Texas

“Fort Hood is a weird parallel universe where discipline, fitness, esprit de corps and pride of service do not exist. All of the worst things associated with ‘big army’ are in full force here. Be prepared to do some epically stupid things here ‘because that’s the way it’s always been done here’ hurr durr derp derp.

If your idea of military service is living in the world’s largest halfway house for violent offenders that happen to wear the same clothes, come on down. Come to the ‘great place’. Derp derp.” —Peter B.

Marine Corps Base Camp Pendleton, Oceanside, Calif.

“Welcome to the early 1960s mindset. The landscape resembles California from 100-200 years ago. Pendleton refuses to fully staff the entrance gates. Officers don’t work but just watch as traffic backs up hundreds of feet. Bored kid traffic cops cruise up and down Vandergrift stopping people on bogus invented charges. They don’t like the way your car looks, they stop you. Traffic laws are different than in the civilian United States.  The list of illogical and arbitrary rules is endless.

It’s a small town and high school mentality. They escape to Oceanside where they can be free of their leaders and drink to forget. And look at women. The height of culture at Pendleton is Mcdonalds. Stores are staffed by rude incompetent workers. Both civilians and military gets treated like garbage.” —Buster H.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

Fort Irwin National Training Center, Fort Irwin, Calif.

“When a Soldier joins the Army, he is given a canteen of Hooah. Throughout his career he splashes little bits of Hooah out, to get him through deployments and rough times. When he gets to Irwin, he dumps that canteen upside down and pours it out, and shakes out the last drops.” —Johnny S.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

Minot Air Force Base, Minot, N.D.

“It’s pretty dull and as it is said, ‘Where all good leaders come to die.'” —Drew O.

Fort Bragg, Fayetteville, N.C.

“There are magical forests filled with trails into nothingness.  There are inaccessible lakes that cater to no aspiring outdoorswoman/man. Everything lacks effort. The only feasible recreational area is Smith Lake…and it’s not even on Main Post.” —Christine A.

This ‘Jack Ryan’ and ‘The Office’ cut is the funniest thing you’ll see this weekend

Marine Corps Air Ground Combat Center 29 Palms, Twentynine Palms, Calif.

“Have you ever heard the saying, ‘it could always be worse?’

29 Palms is the only exception.

Do you enjoy…

– waking up in a full body sweat

– being close to nothing

– an endless supply of sketchy people out and about during the night

– a brown, sandy, dusty scenery that lasts year round

If you are a military family, this place will…

– steal your souls

– destroy your family

– make your kids wish they could go back to where the came from, and eventually resent their parents

– make you resent yourself and the Marine corps for putting your family through such a horrible duty station

This place is about as horrible as it gets. ” —Nate. C (there’s even more)

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