Here’s why the Mandalorian Season 2 Episode 2 is the worst episode - We Are The Mighty
MIGHTY MOVIES

Here’s why the Mandalorian Season 2 Episode 2 is the worst episode

After leaving us with a fun (probable Boba Fett) easter egg last week, Chapter 10 opens with a meaningless action sequence that has no real consequence other than a long walk for Djarin (Pedro Pascal). The Yoda Baby is definitely going to need therapy if he’s going to be a wise Jedi leader — the kid has been thrown, concussed, and exposed to violence and murder a lot, you guys. Like, a lot.

Spoilers ahead.

Djarin is still searching for some Mandalorians and conveniently, Peli Motto (Amy Sedaris) just met a creature who has a lead. “The Frog Lady,” as she’s credited, needs secure passage to rendezvous with her husband in The System in order to fertilize her eggs — and in exchange, her husband will tell Djarin where he might find a Mandalorian cohort.

OMG there are going to be so many egg-backpacks at Comic-Con next year… (Mandalorian concept art | Disney+)

In the ship, the Yoda Baby is left alone with the eggs and here’s what I wrote in my notes: “I’m legit worried that Yoda Baby will eat the spawn…ew, Jesus, I was right.” This became a running joke(???) throughout the episode that was extremely problematic. The Frog Lady has made it clear that her only hope to prevent extinction is to reunite with her husband so he can fertilize her eggs and they can reproduce. 

In other words, those eggs are her unborn children. To imply that it’s funny or cute that The Child keeps eating them, keeps literally murdering them, is very obtuse coming from a male writer and male director. It makes my skin crawl. Such a crime and violation should be treated with the severity of when Starbuck’s ovary was surgically cut out from her while she was imprisoned by Cyclons in Battlestar Galactica.

Murder baby. (The Mandalorian | Disney+)

The Frog Lady was dehumanized and her desire to have children was treated as a joke. Considering how few female characters there even are in the series (it has yet to pass the Bechdel Test — though it received praise for hiring female directors), it further displays how tone-deaf stories can be when women are shut out of telling them. 

MOVING ON.

During their space flight, Djarin and his cargo were intercepted by two New Republic X-Wings who started asking too many questions for Djarin’s comfort. In an effort to evade them, he crashed on an ice planet, wrecking the hull of his Razor Crest. While he sought to repair it, his cargo made some decisions.

The Frog Lady decided to take a hot spring dip with her eggs while the Yoda Baby decided to eat some eggs he discovered in the ice caves. Inside the eggs were calamari-looking spiders and the whole scene was disgusting — but not as bad as what came next. 

The hundreds of eggs reacted and began to hatch, joined by creatures Star Wars Rebels fans will recognize as Krykna — giant (ice) spiders.

Empire Strikes Back concept art depicting Krykna on Dagobah. (Lucasfilm Ltd.)

Hundreds of Krykna then scuttled after the trio, ranging from babies to horse-sized spiders, to enormous monsters that were heavier than Djarin’s ship. It was tense and gross. They were saved at last by the return of the X-Wings, who had checked in on Djarin’s records and determined that he wasn’t a bad guy. 

After slaying the hordes of Krykna, the pilots left Djarin to repair his ship and limp his shaky way to The Frog Man.

TWEET OF THE WEEK

Ughhhh I hate it.

MIGHTY MOVIES

18 of the best jokes in the Marvel Cinematic Universe

Why are the Marvel movies so damn popular? Well, that might be the wrong question, because the more important question should be: how did the Marvel movies get to be so damn funny? What are the best jokes in the funniest Marvel movies?

From “Iron Man” in 2008 to “Avengers: Endgame” in 2019, one thing moviegoers have always been able to count on from these films is a one-liner quip machine even in the bleakest of installments. Figuring out all the funniest moments in all 22 installments of the official Marvel Cinematic Universe might seem like a task better suited to one of Tony Stark’s supercomputers, but since Jarvis and Friday aren’t real, you’ll have to deal with human bias. So, with that in mind, here are 18 of the best jokes from the entire Marvel Cinematic Universe. And to avoid saying any of these jokes are better or worse than others, we’re just listing these jokes in chronological order.

Warning: Joke spoilers for all Marvel movies ahead!


1. “Let’s face it, this is not the worst thing you’ve caught me doing.”

When Pepper Potts walks in on Tony messing with his Iron Man suit, this classic Stark comeback cannot be beaten.

2. “We have a Hulk.”

From the 2012 “Avengers,” Tony Stark’s rebuttal to Loki’s boast “I have an army” is “We have a Hulk.” This is made all the sweeter when you consider Loki himself says “We have a Hulk” when he stands-up to Thanos in “Infinity War.”

3. “Better clench up, Legolas.”

Tony Stark’s pop culture references are an artform. If you don’t know who Legolas is and why this is funny, I’m sorry that I have to explain this to you: Legolas is an elf archer from “Lord of the Rings.” Hawkeye is an archer. Okay. enough explaining.

4. “I’m a huge fan of the way you lose control and turn into an enormous green rage monster.”

This Tony Stark quip is preceded by him complimenting Bruce Banner on his scientific achievements, which of course, is totally overshadowed by his ability to Hulk-out.

5. “No hard feelings, Point Break.”

I’m not going to explain this reference. I’ll explain “Lord of the Rings” references, but not this one. Either you get it, or you don’t. (If you’re reading this website and you’re a dad, I’m guessing you get this.)

6. “I understood that reference!”

Steve Rogers is great when he gets super-earnest in subsequent Avengers flicks, but he’s pretty much the best when he’s struggling with 21st-century pop culture references. In the first “Avengers,” when Steve actually understands one of Nick Fury’s references to “The Wizard of Oz,” his reaction is pure gold.

7. “The city is flying. We’re fighting an army of robots. And I have a bow and arrow. None of this makes sense.”

One of the funniest meta-fictional lines in any Marvel movie. Hawkeye knows nothing about his role in these movies makes sense.

8. “Why would I put my finger on his throat?”

You could, in theory, do an entire list of just great jokes and funny moments from both “Guardians of the Galaxy” movies and their appearances in “Infinity War” and “Endgame.” I’ve tried to prevent too many “Guardians” jokes from dominating this list. But still, when Star-Lord is trying to reason with Drax in that prison, this visual gag where Drax doesn’t understand the pantomime for killing someone is hilarious.

9. “If I had a black light, this place would look like a Jackson Pollock painting”

A crass joke that flies over the head of kids and into the ears of knowing adults. Nice. Totally on-brand from Chris Pratt’s Star-Lord. Also, fun fact, this line was ad-libbed by Chris Pratt on the spot.

10. “He says he’s an a-hole, and I’m quoting him here, but he’s not 100 percent…a dick”

John C. Reilly’s small role in “Guardians of the Galaxy” is underrated. It just is.

11. “If you say one more word, I’ll feed you to my children! I’m kidding. We’re vegetarians.”

M’baku might not be as famous as T’Challa in the kingdom of Wakanda, but he’s pretty much the funniest person in “Black Panther.”

12. “He’s a friend from work!”

When Thor realizes he’s supposed to fight the Hulk in “Ragnarok,” he’s thrilled and relieved. This line is fantastic because it’s so relatable, but it’s made ten times sweeter when you know that a Make-A-Wish kid actually suggested the line in the first place. True story!

13. “Dude, you’re embarrassing me in front of the wizards.”

Tony Stark and Bruce Banner’s reunion in “Infinity War” is full of a lot of great moments, but this joke is easily the best.

14. “OH! we’re using our made-up names!”

The lovable innocence of Tom Holland’s Peter Parker is always great and when he understandably doesn’t understand that Dr. Strange’s real name is Dr. Strange, it’s one of the funniest moments in the entire series.

15. “Kick names. Take ass”

Mantis’ mangling of a pretty common cliche turns it into something very different thanks to her naivite — and impeccable timing.

16. “I get emails from a raccoon, so nothing sounds crazy.”

Black Widow is super tired in this “Avengers: Endgame” one-liner, but her workplace emails are certainly a little different than yours. Or are they?

17. “What’s up, regular-sized man?”

Rhodey gets in on the one-liner action, in one of the best jokes for “Endgame.” Picking on Ant-Man might not be nice, but it is hilarious.

18. “As far as I’m concerned, that is America’s ass.”

Paul Rudd, an actual comedic actor who found his way into the Marvel universe as Ant-Man, gets what is probably the very best line in “Avengers: Endgame.” This joke is so good, it gets repeated by Steve Rogers as he’s staring at former-him’s ass.

This article originally appeared on Fatherly. Follow @FatherlyHQ on Twitter.

MIGHTY FIT

How Ryan Reynolds got in superhero shape to play Deadpool

Ryan Reynolds reportedly gained seven pounds of lean muscle to play his dream role, loud-mouthed superhero Deadpool, in 2016.

So it’s no surprise that the actor went through “a huge bulking phase” to get prepped again for the hero’s long-anticipated sequel. Here’s everything we know about how he got into shape to play the iconic “merc with a mouth.”


He prioritizes warm-ups before strength training.

Reynolds has worked with celebrity trainer Don Saladino— who also works with Reynolds’ wife, Blake Lively— for many years.

Saladino and Reynolds focused on building actual strength to film “Deadpool,” rather than aiming to simply look good on the outside. To accomplish this goal, they did movement training every day before lifting weights to prep Reynolds’ body, according to Men’s Journal.

“This is important because he’s going to be moving in all sorts of ways through his training. Every single joint needs to warm up,” Saladino told the publication.

Reynolds’ movement prep includes dynamic stretching, as well as three cardio circuits with 10 reps of bounding, overhead shovel throws, and Turkish get-ups.

“You’re getting the body prepared for a number of motions,” Saladino told Men’s Journal. “These are more expansive than your typical lifting movements.”

He allows for flexibility in his workout routine.

Saladino noted that, while he and Reynolds tried to stick to a weekly strength plan that included two days off, it was constantly adjusted to fit the needs of his body and schedule.

“The biggest mistake that people make when making an exercise plan is not to listen to their body every day,” Saladino told Men’s Journal. “Ryan was a recent father and traveling a lot [when “Deadpool” was being filmed], so if he had been up all night with the baby, or just gotten off a plane from Singapore, you can best believe we were changing up the program.”

He took it upon himself to work out in his downtime.

“Don [Saladino] gave me a plan so I could train whenever I needed to,” Reynolds told Men’s Health in 2016. “It made things more manageable. And if I wanted to spend a little extra time with my daughter in the morning, I could do that.”

Reynolds has said that he has a “functional” approach to training rather than a “fashionable” one, so he usually prefers to work out alone and on his own time.

Saladino admitted that he is never concerned about Reynolds’ commitment to the workout regimen.

“Ryan’s such a hard worker,” Saladino told Men’s Health. “If anything, I had to scale him down. One day he came up to see me having been working out on his own and I was like, ‘Holy sh-t!’ He looked like a different person.”

Reynolds also told Men’s Health that he will sometimes call fellow superhero Hugh Jackman for encouragement or advice, claiming that Jackman “could be a world-class trainer.”

Reynolds favors simple moves with added weight to increase difficulty.

“Ryan loves deadlifts, and he loves squats because he knows that’s how he’s going to make real gains,” Saladino told Men’s Journal.

Another move that encourages both strength and mobility is a walking lunge with rotation, using a 40-pound weight for added difficulty. Saladino recently posted a video of the 41-year-old actor performing the move while also wearing a 30-pound weighted vest.

“I like using these traditional movements with little twists,” Saladino explained. “This move, in particular, is not only maintaining the strength that he built up to play Deadpool but also encourages stabilization and balance. We have done exercises similar to this over the course of the past few years, but sometimes with a kettlebell and without the vest during our warm-ups.”

He keeps his workouts varied.

Bobby Storm, who trained Reynolds for his previous stint as a superhero in “Green Lantern,” told Muscle Fitness that Reynolds trains for films like a bodybuilder trains for competitions.

“Strom kept the action star’s body guessing by constantly changing up his workouts every day,” writes the website.

Strom also revealed that he had Reynolds begin every gym session with a 20-minute abs workout, followed by different versions of muscle-building circuits.

He battles his aversion to cardio by exercising outdoors.

Reynolds told Men’s Health that he doesn’t particularly enjoy cardio: “For me, that kind of sustained running is tough, mechanically speaking.”

However, the father of two did admit that he can battle this aversion with outdoor exercises and activities.

“I love being outdoors,” he said. “There are forests all around [where I live] and I get to hike, mountain bike … just move. I’ll even bring the baby with me, put her in a little baby carrier thing and off we go. In a weird way, it’s a great workout because you’re adding 20 pounds to your bodyweight.”

It’s certainly admirable that Reynolds juggles his responsibilities as an action star with his growing family of four— but his DIY style when it comes to fitness can work for just about anyone.

This article originally appeared on Insider. Follow @thisisinsider on Twitter.

MIGHTY MOVIES

Twitter thinks Optimus Prime is the most inspirational dude ever

Normally, asking which of two beloved characters with rabid fanbases is a way to rile people up, to start up a spirited debate. Kirk vs. Picard is the classic example of this kind of question: there’s no right answer, which is why it’s fun to talk about.

So when a Twitter user asked who gives the better speeches, Captain America or Optimus Prime, we didn’t expect anything approaching a consensus to emerge. And yet, one did.


It’s Optimus Prime, by a mile. And honestly, after we rewatched the speeches people posted in the replies, it’s hard not to agree. It might not be fair—he’s a massive robot after all—but he has more gravitas than Cap. There’s also the fact that the Transformers stories present plenty of opportunities to talk about the future of the human race and that, in the Avengers films at least, Cap is one of dozens of characters competing for screen time.

As a refresher, here is one of Optimus Prime’s best speeches from the Transformers films.

And here’s one of Cap’s, from Winter Soldier.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=110&v=yv-lEtzVK8I&feature=emb_logo
Captain America’s Epic Speech Scene – Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014) HD

www.youtube.com

If you need a moment to wipe away those tears, we understand. Once you’re ready, you can check out some of the clever replies fans posted in response.

This one is cool because you get to see Peter Cullen, the voice actor who absolutely kills it as Optimus.

But it wasn’t unanimous, and Cap still has his defenders.

This article originally appeared on Fatherly. Follow @FatherlyHQ on Twitter.

MIGHTY MOVIES

‘Dark Phoenix’ surprises with an unexpected villain

The latest “X-Men” movie shows Jean Grey get taken over by a mysterious cosmic force, pitting her against the X-Men for most of the movie.

However, it’s revealed early on that Jean isn’t the only threat the X-Men need to worry about.

This is your last chance to head back before spoilers.


Early in the movie, a group of shapeshifting aliens crash on Earth to take over the planet after their home is destroyed. One of them, who we later learn is named Vuk, takes over the body of a nameless woman played by Jessica Chastain.

Jessica Chastain and Sophie Turner star in “Dark Phoenix.”

(20th Century Fox)

From there, we learn Vuk is the leader of an alien race called the D’Bari. Their planet was destroyed by a cosmic force — the Phoenix — that had demolished everything in its path until it was absorbed by Jean. Once landing on Earth, the group makes a quick decision that they’re taking over Earth, ridding it of every human, and rebuilding it from scratch for themselves.

They just need to acquire the cosmic force from Jean. (Apparently, that’s a thing they can do even though it destroyed their planet and many of their people.)

Both Vuk and the D’Bari’s names are said once in all of “Dark Phoenix” and it’s easy to miss either name-drop in a quick moment. Strangely, the film doesn’t spend much time on them other than to say they’re aliens, they’re bad, and they’re coming to kill us all.

If you’re familiar with the comics, you’ll know that the characters are a part of the “Dark Phoenix” story line at one point. However, they’re not a group who has appeared that much in the Marvel comics. Even if you did catch their name during the movie, you may find yourself doing a quick search for more info on them after the movie because they’re a bit different from the D’Bari you may remember in the comics.

Unlike the aliens we see in “Dark Phoenix,” the D’Bari look like vegetables in the comics.

(Marvel Comics)

Who are the D’Bari? They’re not bad guys in the comics.

The group first debuted in the comics in a 1964 issue of “Avengers,” and is labeled as antagonists. But their most significant appearance was in 1980’s “The Uncanny X-Men” No. 135 and they definitely weren’t obsessed with taking over the Earth.

Just like the “Dark Phoenix” movie explains, they’re an alien race who are best known for having their planet destroyed. However, they can’t shapeshift and the circumstances of them losing their planet is much different in the comics. Jean Grey is responsible for killing most of the D’Bari and destroying their planet.

The D’Bari lived on a planet in the D’Bari star system, which was very similar to our own Earth. At this point, Jean Grey already had the power of the Phoenix and had just gone on a rampage against her fellow X-Men.

Power hungry, Jean Grey soars far into space out of our galaxy and into the D’Bari star system where she fuels up by depleting a star of its power. That star, very similar to our sun, gave life to the D’Bari’s home planet and quickly destroyed it. “The Uncanny X-Men” describes the D’Bari as an “ancient, peace-loving civilization.” Jean Grey wiped out five billion of them.

On Earth, Vuk went by the alias Starhammer.

(Marvel Comics)

And who’s Vuk?

Vux doesn’t appear in “The Uncanny X-Men” No. 135. In the comics, Vux is actually a male and he wasn’t on his home planet when it was destroyed. As a result, Vuk heads to Earth to, understandably, seek vengeance. He also cannot shape-shift.

Wait. These characters don’t look or sound anything like the ones in “Dark Phoenix.”

Yeah, we know. Other than a similar background story, the D’Bari in the comics and movie only appear to share the same name.

You know who they do sound and look a lot like? The shapeshifting D’Bari in “Dark Phoenix” remind us a lot of the shape-shifting Skrulls in “Captain Marvel.” In the Disney/Marvel movie, which was released in March, the alien race comes to Earth and transforms themselves into any one they come into contact with. Unlike the D’Bari of “Dark Phoenix,” they don’t wish to take over the planet. But their powers and design are somewhat similar.

Here’s how the Skrulls look in “Captain Marvel”:

Here are two of the Skrulls in “Captain Marvel.”

(Marvel Studios)

Fox hasn’t released any images of the D’Bari, yet. Chastain, who plays the D’Bari leader, told Yahoo UK at the end of May that her character changed a lot during the making of the movie, suggesting that she may not have been a D’Bari alien to begin with.

“My character changed a lot, which is an interesting thing because I’m not playing someone from the comics,” Chastain said of Vuk. “So it was always everyday trying to figure out ‘Who am I? Who is the mystery that is this character?’ And then understanding with the reshoots ‘Oh, it’s changing again.’ It was a constant evolution…. So yeah, my character changed.”

This article originally appeared on Insider. Follow @thisisinsider on Twitter.

MIGHTY MOVIES

6 historical inaccuracies in Band of Brothers

Most members of the military will be familiar with the HBO miniseries Band of Brothers, which follows the story of the men of Easy Company, 506th Parachute Infantry Regiment, 101st Airborne Division in WWII. Produced by Steven Spielberg and Tom Hanks after their 1998 success, Saving Private Ryan, the miniseries has been praised for its drama and storytelling.

Using leftover props and costumes from Saving Private Ryan, and with the consulting help of surviving Easy Company veterans, Hanks and Spielberg strove to bring the stories of Easy Company to life. However, Band of Brothers did take some artistic license for the sake of storytelling and presented some glaring historical inaccuracies as a result.

A serious WWII history buff could point out dozens of small mistakes in Band of Brothers like the inaccuracies of a German Jagdpanther at Bloody Gulch, the wearing of the 101st Screaming Eagle patch during the Battle of the Bulge, or the anachronistic headset worn by a C-47 pilot taking off from England. However, this article will focus on 6 inaccuracies that actually changed important historical details or rewrote a person’s story.

A German Gebirgsjäger officer with his Edelweiss badge displayed on his headgear. (Photo posted by user SprogCollector via wehrmacht-awards.com)

Edelweiss – Part Three Carentan

During this episode, Private Albert Blithe is sent forward of Easy Company to re-establish contact with Fox Company during a night movement. Moving quietly through the darkness, he rounds a tree and is startled by a German soldier behind an MG42 machine gun. Lt. Dick Winters emerges from the darkness, further startling Blithe, and informs him that the German is dead. Lt. Lewis Nixon joins them and identifies the German as a Fallschirmjäger, a paratrooper. He further identifies a flower on the German’s uniform as Edelweiss, saying that it only grows high up in the Alps and is meant to be the mark of a true soldier.

Gebirgsjäger, German and Austrian mountain troops, wore Edelweiss badges, not flowers, on their uniforms as a symbol of pride in their mountaineering and soldiering skills. As such, it is highly unlikely that a paratrooper would adopt a symbol that held so much importance to mountain soldiers. It can be likened to U.S. paratroops taking great pride in their distinct bloused jump boots. Later in the 20th century, many a nose was broken at Fort Benning by paratroopers who caught a non-paratrooper wearing bloused jump boots.

Shooting POWs – Part Two Day of Days

This episode serves as the catalyst for the many rumors about Ronald Speirs shooting German POWs on D-Day. In it, Don Malarkey jogs away from a group of prisoners being watched over by Lt. Speirs and another Dog Company paratrooper when he hears automatic gunfire from behind him—the implication being that Speirs executed the prisoners. In later episodes, the rumors evolve from Speirs shooting a few prisoners, to shooting eight, shooting twenty, and even shooting a drunk sergeant for refusing to go out on patrol.

In a video interview, former Dog Company trooper Private Art Dimarzio recalled capturing three Germans on D-Day with Speirs and a sergeant. “The LT called us together in a bunch and he said, ‘…you take one,’ they were all laying in a ditch, ‘I’ll take this one, and sarge you take that one.’ And we paired off and we shot the three of them.” DiMarzio also noted that, a few hours later, they came upon another group of Germans, all of whom Speirs shot. This account is entirely plausible given the orders issued to the paratroopers by General Maxwell Taylor, commander of the 101st Airborne Division.

“Take no prisoners,” Malarkey recalls General Taylor telling them. “If you were to take prisoners, they’d handicap our ability to perform our mission.”

Hitler’s suicide – Part Nine Why We Fight

The episode opens stating that it is April 11, 1945 in Thalem, Germany. A string quartet of German civilians plays Beethoven’s String Quartet No. 14 in C-sharp Minor. Around them, other civilians clear up the rubble of their battered city under the supervision of U.S. soldiers while Easy Company soldiers look down from a damaged apartment building. The rest of the episode flashes back to Easy Company’s initial invasion of Germany before returning to the Thalem apartment where Captain Nixon informs the men that Hitler is dead.

Assuming the men have not been sitting in the same apartment listening to the same string quartet for nineteen days, this scene is anachronistic as Hitler committed suicide on April 30, 1945. It is unclear why this error was made or why it persisted from the HBO television release to the home video release, since a simple edit to the opening statement could make it April 30, 1945. This is an extreme oversight for such a big budget production.

Lt. Dike – Part Seven The Breaking Point

Part Seven focuses primarily on Easy Company First Sergeant Carwood Lipton as he works to maintain the unit’s morale and combat effectiveness during the Battle of the Bulge. However, his efforts are hindered by their new commander, Lt. Norman Dike. Dike is rarely seen around the men, leaving them to go on walks or make phone calls at Battalion HQ. His behavior earns him the nickname “Foxhole Norman”. During the attack on Foy, Dike becomes paralyzed by fear and panics under pressure, sending a single platoon exposed on a doomed flanking mission. His poor leadership results in the deaths of many Easy Company men before he is relieved by Lt. Speirs and is eventually killed during the attack.

Firsthand accounts show that Dike was not a well-liked officer during his command of Easy Company, but he was by no means the cowardly and ineffective officer that was portrayed on screen. During the attack on Foy, Easy Company trooper Clancy Lyall saw Dike get shot in his right shoulder. Omitted from the on-screen depiction, this wound inhibited Dike’s decision-making and caused him to panic. Furthermore, Dike won two Bronze Star Medals for valor earlier in the war; one in Holland for organizing a hasty defense against, “superior and repeated attacks”, and another at Bastogne where, “…he personally removed from an exposed position, in full enemy view, three wounded members of his company, while under intense small arms fire.”

Finally, Dike was not killed at Foy. He survived his wound and became the aide to General Taylor. Dike remained in the Army for the remainder of the war, served in Korea, and eventually attained the rank of Lieutenant Colonel in the Army Reserves. He also went back to Yale and earned his law degree. He worked as a U.S. Commissioner in Japan, practiced law in New York City and Washington D.C., and was even employed by the CIA for a time. He died in Rolle, Switzerland on June 23, 1989.

Master Sergeant Albert Blithe and his wife Kay. (Photo from findagrave.com)

Private Blithe — Part Three Canretan

Episode three begins with Private Albert Blithe just after D-Day when he rejoins Easy Company after the confusion of the drop. Following the fight to take Carentan, he is struck with a case of hysterical blindness. After recovering, Blithe returns to Easy Company. Following his encounter with the dead German, Blithe admits to Lt. Speirs that he didn’t try to find his unit on D-Day; instead, he hid in a ditch out of fear. Speirs tells him that he’s already dead and that he must accept that in order to function as a soldier should, “without mercy, without compassion, without remorse.”

Blithe follows Speirs’ advice and fights ferociously during the German counterattack at Bloody Gulch. After the battle, Blithe finds a dead German that he shot and removes the Edelweiss on the German’s uniform. Blithe takes the Edelweiss for himself and places it on his uniform, completing his character arc. A few days later, he volunteers to investigate a farmhouse during a patrol where he is shot in the neck by a German sniper. The episode ends saying that Blithe died from his wounds in 1948.

Blithe’s depiction is mostly true. He was stricken with hysterical blindness and he was shot by a sniper whilst investigating a farmhouse. However, Blithe was shot in his collarbone. He recovered from his wounds and was sent back to the states. He remained in the Army and fought with the 187th Airborne Regimental Combat Team in Korea. After his second war, Blithe was assigned to the Military Assistance Advisory Group in Taiwan. In December 1967, while on active duty in Germany, Blithe attended a ceremony in Bastogne commemorating the Battle of the Bulge. Upon his return to Germany, Blithe felt nauseous and was taken to the ER at Wiesbaden Hospital. He was diagnosed with a perforated ulcer and died in the ICU on December 17 after surgery. Blithe had attained the rank of Master Sergeant and was buried with full honors at Arlington National Cemetery.

The other men of Easy Company never found out what happened to Blithe after he was wounded at the farmhouse. They assumed he succumbed to his wounds and the producers of the show did no further research. Having spent more than 20 years in the Army over the course of three wars, Blithe deserves more credit than he is given in Band of Brothers.

Winters displays the surrendered sidearm of the German Major. (Photo from We Stand Alone Together, Credit to HBO)

The surrender — Part Ten Points

The last episode of the miniseries follows Major Dick Winters and Easy Company during the last few months of the war. After the official German surrender, Winters meets with a German Colonel who offers Winters his Luger pistol as his formal surrender. Out of respect for a fellow soldier, Winters allows the Colonel to keep his sidearm. The German is surprised by Winters’ gesture and gives him a crisp salute in return.

In reality, the surrendering German was a Major like Winters. The sidearm that he offered as his formal surrender was a Walther PP (a long-barreled version of James Bond’s famous Walther PPK), which Winters accepted and kept until his death in 2011. In an interview for HBO, Winters showed the pistol and recounted the German’s surrender:

I was assigned this Major and when he walked in, he presented me this pistol and offered his personal surrender, which naturally I accepted gratefully. So that would be the end of the war for his men and this is basically the end of the war for my men. And the significance is that, it wasn’t until later when he had given me this pistol and I got a chance to look at it carefully that I realized, this pistol had never been fired. There was no blood on it. That’s the way all wars should end: with an agreement with no blood on it. And I assure you this pistol has never, never been fired since I’ve had it and it will not be fired.

Winters’ powerful and insightful words about the surrender make the scene in Band of Brothers feel like a missed opportunity. The real-life exchange between the two Majors and the impression that the symbolic pistol left would have been more impactful than the surrender shown on screen.

After the series premiere, Winters told Hanks that he wished the production had been more authentic, hoping for an “80 percent solution.”

Hanks responded, “Look, Major, this is Hollywood. At the end of the day, we will be hailed as geniuses if we get this 12 percent right. We are going to shoot for 17 percent.”

Band of Brothers is a well-made and fitting tribute to (most of) the men who fought in Easy Company during WWII. As with most Hollywood productions, the history was adapted for dramatic effect and series structure. Certain stories and experiences were modified or folded into other characters for the sake of storytelling, but the show as a whole is still one of the best portrayals of WWII to date. In the case of the aforementioned stories and experiences however, their true history deserves to be told, learned, and remembered.

MIGHTY MOVIES

Why Clark Griswold may be one of the most perfect veterans in film

Every Christmas, we watch a handful of films that are just so iconic to Americana that, no matter how many times they get played, you’ll watch ’em again next year. One such film is National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. Though never overtly stated in the film, it’s pretty clear that Chevy Chase’s character, Clark Griswold, is a former sailor in the U.S. Navy. Every action he takes falls perfectly in line with how 90% of veterans are in real life.


We get a clue into Clark’s service when crazy Aunt Bethany arrives for Christmas Eve dinner. She’s senile and has a tendency to ask questions that haven’t been relevant for years. She asks Ellen if she’s still dating Clark, but they’ve been married and have two teenage kids. Perhaps more importantly, she asks Clark’s son, Rusty, if he’s still in the Navy.

This doesn’t make sense — Rusty’s still a kid. But earlier in the film, when Clark’s stuck in the attic, he not only walks by a military tough-box labelled, “Griswold,” he also watches some old family videos featuring crazy Aunt Bethany giving cookies to what appears to be a younger “Sparky” Clark, in uniform.

She’s old and probably mixed up the names. (Film by Warner Brothers: National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation)

He’s a perfectionist, even if he procrastinates.

Clark’s central goal throughout the entire National Lampoon’s Vacation franchise is to give his family the best vacation ever. In Christmas Vacation, it’s all about having the most festive time. But, just like a veteran, he overdoes everything at the expense of his sanity and safety.

Unlike everyone else in the neighborhood, the Griswolds don’t have their houses decorated well in advance of the holidays — Clark begins decorating the house on Dec. 15. He makes up for his lost time by checking every bulb (twice) and manages to hook up  25,000 “twinkling little” lights in just one day. When it doesn’t go right, he manages to set it all up and get it right the next day.

Rerouting the entirety of Chicago’s power grid? All in a day’s work for a veteran. (Film by Warner Brothers: National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation)

His family is both overly patriotic and crazy in their own right.

Military families almost always have two things in common: they’re dysfunctional and very patriotic. They’re crazy, but they’re our families, so we make due. Every scene in the film is full of moments that military families can relate to.

During breakfast, both Clark’s and Ellen’s fathers argue over who had worse rations in the background, so we can assume they’re also veterans. Later on, during Christmas dinner, the family begins saying grace, but it eventually diverts into the Pledge of Allegiance. When the sewer blows up and the plastic Santa goes flying, they just give in and sing the Star-Spangled Banner.

Only a veteran would be as calm as Clark was with this scene. (Film by Warner Brothers: National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation)

When he snaps…

Rounding out how Chevy Chase perfectly captures the spirit of a veteran is, of course, the famous rant. Only a veteran can be this creative with off-the-cuff insults.

Warning: This video contains NFSW language. (Movieclips | YouTube)

What do you guys think? Let us know in the comment section.

MIGHTY MOVIES

6 biggest twists from ‘Spider-Man: Far From Home’ explained

Warning: Major spoilers below. Do not read if you haven’t seen “Spider-Man: Far From Home.”

Director Jon Watts calls “Spider-Man: Far From Home” a “con movie,” and if you’ve seen it already, you know exactly why. The movie uses the audience’s collective knowledge of the Marvel Cinematic Universe to present a story that completely messes with their heads.

From the real motives of the movie’s villain, Quentin Beck (aka, Mysterio; played by Jake Gyllenhaal), to the surprise cameos, “Far From Home” is a rapid-fire series of twists, all the way to the post-credit scene.

And Watts said that sleight-of-hand feel was ingrained in the project from the development phase — which began just weeks after “Spider-Man: Homecoming” opened in theaters in 2017 — because of the movie’s villain.


“It was such a core concept because it’s Mysterio’s whole philosophy,” Watts told INSIDER. “When you’re dealing with a character who works in illusions and deception, that’s going to be one of the major themes.”

So Watts beefed up on his con movies, specifically spending a lot of time studying “The Sting” and “The Usual Suspects,” and embarked on telling a unique Marvel movie, one where almost everything is not what it seems.

Below, Watts gave INSIDER insight on 6 of the biggest spoilers in “Far From Home,” including stuff you may not catch until you see the movie again.

(Jay Maidment/Sony Pictures)

1. The moment Watts knew the bar scene, in which Peter Parker hands over the E.D.I.T.H. glasses to Mysterio, would work.

Halfway through the movie — after Spider-Man (Tom Holland) and Mysterio defeat one of the Elementals — the two have a celebratory drink at a bar. The scene gradually becomes a dramatic moment in which Peter Parker questions if he has what it takes to be a superhero like his idol, Iron Man. He even doubts if he’s worthy to have the high-tech E.D.I.T.H. glasses that Tony Stark had Nick Fury give him earlier in the movie. By the end of the scene, Parker hands Mysterio the glasses, which have an AI embedded in them that can power all of Stark Industries’ weapons.

But once Parker walks out of the bar, it’s revealed that Mysterio played a huge trick on him. The bar was actually an illusion. Many of the patrons were working for Mysterio and the decor was all artificially projected by clones (they were actually sitting in an abandoned storefront). It was all a con job to get the glasses from Parker so Mysterio could have control of Stark’s high-tech weapons. Even the Elementals Spidey was battling was an illusion put together by Mysterio.

The ambitious scene was one Watts knew had to hit perfectly with the audience if the movie was going to work.

“The movie hinges on that scene,” Watts said. “It’s a culmination of Mysterio’s con. I anticipate that a lot of people will know that Mysterio is the villain, they aren’t just exactly sure how or why.”

Watts said there were not multiple versions of the scene shot. What you see in the movie is how the scene was scripted. And though he spent months with the screenwriters getting the scene to feel right, he wasn’t convinced it would work until Holland and Gyllenhaal got their hands on it.

“What’s great about working with actors like Tom and Jake is that they bring it to life,” he said. “They have to make sure that none of it feels false. I remember the first time we ran it, we tweaked a couple of lines but as soon as they started going through it between the two of them, it was a huge relief for me. It was one of those moments where you have talked about it a lot and prepared so much, but it has to come to life with the actors or the whole movie feels false.”

(Sony Pictures)

2. The bar scene is also filled with hidden messages to influence Peter Parker to give up the glasses.

The whole trick with the bar scene is Mysterio has to get the glasses without ever asking for them. Peter has to be the one who hands them over. Watts said to drive that home, along with watching how classic con movies from the past have done it, he also studied how deception is done on people in real life. And his major takeaway was visual persuasion.

“You may not have caught this, but all the things on the wall behind Quentin [in the bar scene] are things that feed into the idea that Peter would hand the glasses over to him,” Watts said. “So even the art direction is part of the con. There’s military medals, that sort of helps remind Peter what Quentin said about being a hero soldier. There’s a picture of glasses, again, embedding that idea. So there are all these things in the background of the bar in Peter’s eye line that will subconsciously motivate him to hand these glasses over.”

Did you catch any of those visuals? Keep an eye out for them in the bar scene next time you see the movie.

(Sony Pictures)

3. The origin of “The Blip” term.

One of the funniest moments in the opening of the movie is the reveal of the term “The Blip,” which refers to people who were affected by Thanos’ snap that happened in “Avengers: Infinity War” and then came back after the events in “Avengers: Endgame.”

Watts said it was something that they came up with while writing the movie.

“We had our own logic,” he said. “‘The Snap’ was what made everyone disappear, but for everyone who came back it was like no time had passed. So we felt, ‘It’s just like a blip to them.’ That’s just how we started talking about the passage of time. And we also felt it was just a funny phrase to refer to this devastating event.”

And thanks to the term, a running joke came out of it.

Though The Blip felt like just moments for people affected, they were actually gone for five years. So they came back five years older. It does wonders for one of Peter Parker’s high-school classmates, Brad (Remy Hii). Pre-blip he was a short geek, but in those five years, he hit puberty and post-blip he’s a hunky stud clashing with Parker for MJ’s (Zendaya) affection.

(Marvel)

4. Quentin Beck is behind some of the most memorable Stark Industries tech, but never got the credit.

Another great thing about the bar scene is that it gives us Mysterio’s backstory. And it’s steeped in MCU lore.

It turns out he’s the one who created B.A.R.F., the binary augmented retro-framing tech Stark shows off in the beginning of “Captain America: Civil War” — though it was Stark who came up with the silly name (and took the credit).

Mysterio’s past in the movie is a little different than his origin in the comics. In the pages of “The Amazing Spider-Man,” Quentin Beck is a special-effects wiz and stunt man who turns to crime when his dreams of making it big in Hollywood fizzle out. But for the movie, Watts realized that Beck would fit perfectly in the MCU if he made him a bitter former employee at Stark Industries.

“The idea around that was we knew Quentin would have a relationship with Tony,” he said. “The illusion tech that Quentin uses, we’ve actually seen it in the Marvel universe from the beginning. Tony has always dealt with holographic tech, but it’s never been said who made it. And then it really comes to the fore in ‘Civil War.’ But Tony didn’t make it. He doesn’t build all the Stark tech on his own, there’s a whole organization that does it. So we thought that would be how Mysterio pulls this all off. Once that clicked, then we just decided he would have a team of disgruntled Stark Industries employees. We used that B.A.R.F. flashback as a jumping-off point.”

(Columbia Pictures)

5. The return of J. Jonah Jameson.

The mid-credit scene in “Far From Home” is a fun moment for those who were fans of the Sam Raimi movies, as the beloved character J. Jonah Jameson makes a cameo. And like those movies from the early aughts, actor J.K. Simmons returned to play the role.

In the scene, Jameson is not the loud-mouthed editor of the Daily Bugle, but a loud-mouthed host of an Alex Jones-like TV show. In the middle of Manhattan, Jameson appears on a billboard and shows shocking footage of Mysterio, just before his death (which he doctored to make it look like Spider-Man killed him), revealing the true identity of Spider-Man: Peter Parker.

“It made so much sense in the context of the story we were telling,” Watts said of bringing back Jameson. “We knew we wanted Mysterio to be the one who revealed Peter’s identity and it had to be on the news, so we felt if it’s on the news it has to be the Daily Bugle, and if it’s going to be the Daily Bugle, it has to be J.K. Simmons. There was never any question about. And if he didn’t do it, we weren’t going to do it. We would have come up with something else.”

But why make Jameson a TV personality? Watts said putting him on TV instead of overseeing a newspaper was just commenting on the times we live in today.

“He’s still doing a very similar character to what he was doing in the Sam Raimi movies, but now there’s just a real-world comparison that there wasn’t before,” he said. “It’s less that he has changed and more that the world has changed.”

(Disney)

6. Nick Fury and Maria Hill were really Skrulls.

“You didn’t see that one coming, right?” Watts asked with a laugh.

We certainly did not. In the scene that immediately follows the end credits, we are given the movie’s biggest con: Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson) and fellow S.H.I.E.L.D. member Maria Hill (Cobie Smulders) were really Skrulls the entire movie. Yes, Skrulls, those shape-shifting beings we were introduced to in “Captain Marvel.”

It turns out Talos (Ben Mendelsohn) and one of his compatriots came to Earth with instructions from Fury (who we learn is lounging out in space on a big ship) to hand deliver the E.D.I.T.H. glasses to Peter Parker. Clearly things got a little complicated. But it is a fun coda for a movie that completely messes with the audience.

“Once you get into the vocabulary of a con man movie like this, I feel you have more leeway to just keep doing reversals like that,” Watts said. “Everyone is lying. Everyone is hiding something. No one is who they seem. It just made sense that at the end of it we would do this. As we were developing the story, there was always a lingering question of, ‘But, how could anyone fool Nick Fury? His super power is being skeptical.’ But we knew he needed to be fooled in order to make the story work. So as soon as I saw ‘Captain Marvel’ it became obvious how we do it.”

Watts added: “When you watch the movie again with this knowledge about the Skrulls there are some fun things you will catch, especially Fury’s dialogue.”

This article originally appeared on Insider. Follow @thisisinsider on Twitter.

MIGHTY MOVIES

Interview with HISTORY’s Travis Taylor: The Secret of Skinwalker Ranch

For the first time ever, HISTORY is gaining full, unprecedented access to one of the most infamous and secretive hotspots of paranormal and UFO-related activities on earth, Skinwalker Ranch, in a new one-hour nonfiction series, “The Secret of Skinwalker Ranch” premiering Tuesday, March 31 at 10PM ET/PT. Few have ever gained official access to Skinwalker Ranch, and none have ever been able to bring cameras onto the property for a television series, until now.

I had the opportunity to interview Dr. Travis Taylor, the lead astrophysicist of “The Secret of Skinwalker Ranch” about his journey and his experience investigating the unexplained phenomena in Utah’s Uinta Basin. Scientific research, tribal legends, and the unexplained converge at Skinwalker Ranch that you must see to believe.


Photo by History Copyright 2020

WATM: Why and how were you chosen for this project?

Dr. Travis Taylor: Well, first of all for the why and the how I don’t know what you know about me or how much you’ve read of my bio and that sort of thing. I have a PhD and a dual disciplinary degree in electrical engineering and physics called optical science of engineering – it’s basically quantum physics. I have another PhD in aerospace engineering, building and designing spacecraft and rockets. I have a Master’s degree in astronomy. I have a Master’s degree in physics. I have a Master’s degree in mechanical and aerospace engineering. I have a Bachelor’s degree in electrical engineering. Since I was 17, I’m 51 now, I’ve published about two dozen referee journal articles and well-respected peer review physics, and optics and military defense type journals.

As far as I know, I’m the only person besides my co-author of the book who has taken the idea seriously and written a textbook and a detailed examination on how we would defend the planet if we were actually invaded by aliens. Different types of invasions and what our military approach should and could be. In fact, I’m the only one who teaches from that text on the topic to the Air Force officer’s space school at Maxwell Air Force base. Now, I do that pretty much yearly and have for a while.

My background has been building spacecraft, rockets and high-energy laser weapons and things like that for DOD for a long time. I also am a science fiction writer and have written twenty-something best-selling science fiction novels, mostly military hard science fiction. With that background in mind, I was invited to start doing TV shows in the early 2000s which led to the next TV show and the next TV show and so on. When HISTORY and Prometheus were approached by the new billionaire owner of the Ranch to do an investigation, they said, “Well you need someone who is an experimentalist and who also is experienced with talking on TV and we recommend this guy.”

And that’s how that happened.

The Secret of Skinwalker Ranch: DANGEROUS RADIATION at UFO Hotspot (Season 1) | History

www.youtube.com

The Secret of Skinwalker Ranch: DANGEROUS RADIATION at UFO Hotspot (Season 1) | History

WATM: What was the first thing that stuck out to you about this investigation when you joined the team of researchers?

Travis Taylor: Well, when the invitation came to me to become a part of the investigation team and to lead the experiment portion of the research, at first I was very skeptical of the phenomena on the ranch being real or being some natural phenomena that maybe causes hallucinations, or unnatural phenomena that causes actual phenomena like lights in the sky or maybe there was a classified defense project. At no time did I think that I was going to find strange, unexplainable physical phenomena at least from the start. That was my philosophy or my thought going into it. But I did have an open mind that, hey, what if I find something that is unexplainable?

WATM: How was evidence gathered of the phenomena at the Ranch?

Travis Taylor: The way we approached it is, we had scientific instrumentation and sensors — as many as we could afford based on the budget we had — spread about the ranch that were collecting data continuously, 24/7. We also had security cameras placed in certain locations to give us as much of a full view of the ranch as possible that were running 24/7. Plus we had game cameras placed in locations that we could move if we thought there was a need to move them. We collected all this information and we went through the video and data pretty much on a daily basis. Plus, there was also multiple cameramen, camera crews and camera sites set up continuously throughout the investigation.

Photo by History Copyright 2020

WATM: Based on the evidence that you have gathered, what are your thoughts on why this phenomena specifically happens at Skinwalker Ranch?

Dr. Travis Taylor: That is an excellent question and we ask ourselves this all the time. Now, the first thing that I will say is that when the team and I talk about this, in no way do we believe that our man-made farming fences along the border of the 500 acres is keeping out any super, you know, physics hyper paranormal — whatever you guys want to call it, phenomenon within the borders of the ranch. In fact, people in the local in Fort Duchenne, Roosevelt and the other town that’s nearby, are all the time reporting phenomena occurring outside of the boundaries of the ranch. Now, that being said, if you look at the Uintah Basin on Google Earth, to me it looks like an ancient meteor impact crater. It looks like it came from the east to the west at a low inclination. And that’s what splattered the salt flats to the west of the Uintah Basin.

There’s Gilsonite all around the Uintah Basin which typically is only found in a meteor impact crater, plus all of the petroleum that is underneath the Uintah Basin. There are a lot of geologists and natural physicists now beginning to think that impact craters cause a phenomena that creates petroleum. If you look at this impact crater, the ranch is dead center give or take but it’s pretty much dead center. Perhaps [it has] something to do with the bowl shape of the basin or whatever caused the basin, made this the central or the nexus for whatever the activity might be.

Photo by History Copyright 2020

WATM: Would the government hide the evidence of extraterrestrials? What impact would that have on the population if they did or did not disclose evidence?

Dr. Travis Taylor: I honestly don’t believe the Brookings Report. I don’t think that people are going to go nuts. What does an invasion of something that’s invisible do to society? Well guess what it makes it’s all go hide in our houses and be afraid to touch anybody. That’s exactly what’s happening right now, as an alien invasion, with this COVID-19. Well I’m not saying the virus is from outer space.

What I’m saying is it’s alien to us and we’re having to defend it in the way that we figure out how to defend it. If there were an alien invasion, we’d have to figure out what type of invasion it were and then how to – what type it was and then go from there. It could be a bazillion possibilities on the type of invasion.

I don’t believe in big conspiracies. There’s no way that humans are adept enough and trust each other enough to create conspiracies so large it would take hundreds and hundreds of people to maintain it. Now there is the possibility that things have been classified for national security reasons.

At such time when it could be disclosed and not reveal a national security advantage, then I could see that taking place but what’s it going to do to the general public? Most people, the general public, believe there are aliens anyway. I don’t think it’s going to do anything except assure them — I’ll tell you what it will do to politics: it will improve the funding for programs to do research like the AATIP program, or like advanced spacecraft technology or like advanced spacesuit technology. Why all of our soldiers don’t have Iron Man suits I can’t explain that. We should be – that should be one of the biggest defense projects we have.

But we don’t spend any money on it. So that’s the things that will change is where we’re spending our money based on what we think the threats are. That’s all I think disclosure will do. The everyday person, I think, they’ll just say ‘I knew it all along, I told you so.’

Photo by History Copyright 2020

WATM: Is it possible that the phenomena observed is man-made, such as Top Secret weapons testing?

Dr. Travis Taylor: So, as a person who does weapons testing for his day job, I can tell you that would be so highly crazy illegal [and] that it’s nonsense. There would be people in jail. What I observed the first day on the ranch, we had a long discussion that if what we were observing was man-made. [What if] someone was violating federal laws and [what we would do] – we needed to alert the authorities if we could prove it was man-made. Then from that point on I realized what we were measuring was impossible even for mankind to make. At that point is when I dropped that line of discussion because I realized just flat out mankind was not doing what we are doing and it’s probably a skeptics coping mechanism because I did it too.

The first conclusion to an odd strange thing is ‘Oh that’s a classified government program’ and ‘Oh they’re doing human testing’ honestly like, you know, there were programs that the CIA did back in the 60s and 70s that I don’t think they’re proud of and where people were involved in those experiments. [So, if] you look at it nowadays, we realize now that you can’t do that and you won’t get away with it forever and somebody will go to jail. I just am thoroughly convinced that this is not some top-secret weapons testing program on people or whatever. Number one: there’s no site nearby that is doing that type of work and number two: they would eventually get caught and go to jail. There is oversight committees on classified programs in Congress and in the Senate. Eventually somebody would say, ‘Wait a minute you all can’t do that.’

Photo by History Copyright 2020

WATM: Okay, so now that we know that there isn’t a government conspiracy or illegal weapons testing — What is happening at Skinwalker Ranch?

Dr. Travis Taylor: So I’m not going to tell you what evidence was observed and what phenomena were observed because and, you know, it would be spoilers for the show. What I will tell you is yes, when you watch the show and you see the evidence we acquired that is scientifically verifiable, you’re going to be blown away because I was. I’m still amazed to this day and still have a hard time believing what I saw.

You can watch the new one-hour nonfiction series “The Secret of Skinwalker Ranch” premiering Today, Tuesday, March 31 at 10PM ET/PT.

MIGHTY MOVIES

7 movie quotes that perfectly apply to military life

It’s easy to poke fun at the movies that screw up a portrayal of life in the military. Hell, most veterans and troops make drinking games out of just uniform errors alone — and that’s not even touching plot holes or the nonsensical dialogue.


But this isn’t that list. These films got the tiny details right. In fact, in addition to perfectly executed one-liners, these films get many things right.

1. A large portion of troops only enlisted for the benefits.

“Sir, I got lost on the way to college, sir.” – Anthony Swofford, Jarhead (2005)
(brokenhills | YouTube)

2. We love f*cking with civilians.

“I wanted to meet interesting and stimulating people of an ancient culture… and kill them.” – Pvt. Joker, Full Metal Jacket (1987)
(13579111317192329 | YouTube)

3. There isn’t much that scares officers.

“Nah, I don’t think so. More like chewed out. I’ve been chewed out before.” – Lt. Aldo Raine, Inglorious Basterds (2009)
(Andrew Heaston | YouTube)

4. NCOs f*cking hate meaningless small talk.

“Good Morning, Sergeant Major” … “How do you know what kind of goddamn day it is?” – Sgt. Savage to Sgt. Maj. Plumley, We Were Soldiers (2002)
(DMartyr11 | YouTube)

5. NCOs are cocky only because they can back it up.

“My name is Gunnery Sergeant Highway. I’ve drunk more beer, pissed more blood, banged more q**ff, and stomped more ass than all of you numb-nuts put together.” – Gunny Highway, Heartbreak Ridge (1986)
(Kyo003 | YouTube)

6. Deployments are hell…

“Saigon… sh*t. I’m still only in Saigon.” – Capt. Willard, Apocalypse Now (1979)
(okidokivideos | YouTube)

7. No matter what, we’re all American GIs.

“We’re all very different people. We’re not Watusi. We’re not Spartans. We’re Americans, with a capital ‘A.’ You know what that means? Do ya? That means that our forefathers were kicked out of every decent country in the world. We are the wretched refuse. We’re the underdog. We’re mutts! Here’s proof: his nose is cold! But there’s no animal that’s more faithful, that’s more loyal, more loveable than the mutt. Who saw ‘Old Yeller?’ Who cried when Old Yeller got shot at the end? I cried my eyes out. So we’re all dogfaces, we’re all very, very different, but there is one thing that we all have in common: we were all stupid enough to enlist in the Army.” – Pvt. Winger, Stripes (1981)
(Movieclips | YouTube)
Articles

The Doom Marine goes back to Hell in the newest version of this franchise game

Editor’s note: This review deals with a graphic, mature-rated game. Some of the imagery in the video above and the GIFs below reflect the violent nature of the game.


The newest game in the “Doom” franchise, named just “Doom” despite coming after “Doom 3,” was released May 13 to great fanfare, and it’s a solid throwback to the shoot-em-up, arcade feel of the original “Doom” games.

Fans of “Doom 3” may be disappointed that Bethesda moved the series away from the survival horror genre, but players of the earliest games in the franchise will love just how overpowered the Doom Marine feels in most situations, shooting his way through dozens of enemies.

Video capture: WATM Logan Nye

The game opens with the Doom Marine chained naked to a table during a demonic ritual. His first move is to smash a hellspawn to death against said table before breaking out.

Video capture: WATM Logan Nye

The combat that follows is loosely wrapped around a story, but it’s hard to follow in-game because you’re far too busy ripping apart demons to pay attention to any sort of plot.

The broad strokes version is that a brilliant scientist found a way to send energy across the solar system and, instead of beaming geothermal energy collected from volcanic vents on other planets, electromagnetic energy harnessed in planetary fields, or solar energy absorbed from the sun, the scientist decided to open portals to Hell from Mars and use Hell’s energy because … reasons.


This plan goes predictably wrong.

One of the scientists at the station, influenced by all of the Hell energy, has decided that a literal Hell-on-Mars might not be such a bad idea and unleashes destruction on the Mars facility. (Guess whose job it is to fix it.)

While the story is a bit weak and there are a few head-scratching moments, they’re all an excuse to mow down demons, which is what we all came here to do. And there are no human survivors to worry about.

This leaves the Doom Marine free to attack the hordes with no qualms about collateral damage, so the player can fire everything from the plasma rifle to the super shotgun to the beloved BFG with abandon and without remorse. For players unfamiliar with the BFG, it’s name is an acronym for “Big F-cking Gun,” and it delivers.

These high-powered weapons can be upgraded and modified. This is necessary since classic monsters like the Hell Knights, the Revenant, and others are back to ruin the rest of the Doom Marine’s life.

Upgrades and powerups will let the Doom Marine jump across 20 feet of open ground to rip demons apart with his bare hands. (Video capture: WATM Logan Nye)

To help players take down the soldiers of Hell, the game also offers “Rune Challenges” that allow for character upgrades that last between battles. These upgrades make it much easier to survive and smash through enemies and can be combined with temporary power-ups that grant special abilities.

Players who combine rune upgrades and power-ups can become devastating weapons of war, capable of single-handedly bringing down entire legions.

Rampaging across the maps is pretty fun, but can get repetitive. Players who want a real challenge can select “Nightmare” difficulty. This makes the game significantly tougher but doesn’t fix the “been there, done that” feeling of fighting a room full of demons after fighting a room full of demons after fighting a room full of demons.

To break up the campaign, “Doom” also offers a multiplayer mode with a few new twists on standard fare. The most significant addition to all game types is the ability to play as one of your favorite demons after grabbing a pentagram power-up – players start out with the rocket-wielding Revenant unlocked. There’s also a new version of King of the Hill called “Warpath” with a capture point that rotates around the map on a set circuit, and a new game type called Freeze Tag where, unsurprisingly, instead of dying you freeze in a block of ice until your teammates thaw you out.

Players who want something new with great graphics and plenty of opportunities to massacre bad guys should definitely pick up the newest “Doom.” Gamers who are looking for something new from first-person shooters might think about sitting this one out.

MIGHTY MOVIES

5 ‘Game of Thrones’ spin-offs we want to see next

As the dust settles on Game of Thrones, and the wheel is broken with the new king unable to sire any children, the four remaining Stark siblings went their separate ways. Arya, Sansa, Jon, and Bran moved decisively toward the future, with Arya traveling to the edge of the universe, Sansa becoming the queen of an independent north, and Jon traveling beyond the wall, likely to never return to Westeros. The Stark siblings arguably had the most satisfying narrative arcs in the entire show, and so be it, considering the first season they lost most of their living family and were separated and scattered across Westeros itself. So, now that they are going their separate ways, it’s easy to want to stay with them forever. Here are the spin-off shows we want to see the most.


(HBO)

1. The Arya Stark Road Show

Arya Stark’s final scene of the series is her facing the great unknown as she looks towards new adventures and a new life. Wouldn’t it be great to follow her into worlds unknown, and to see what wacky adventures she gets into? Would she ever do some more face-swapping? Would she become a freedom-loving pirate? Would she find love, or would Gendry come after her, renouncing Westerosi culture and choosing to be her adventurous life partner? We’d love to watch it and find out.

(HBO)

2. Sansa Stark the Queen

It’s arguable that Sansa Stark won the Game of Thrones. After all, her major motivation for the past two seasons, ever since being free of the shackles of Ramsay Bolton, was to secure a free and independent Winterfell and north kingdom for her people. Now that she’s done it and is officially a Queen — maybe even the Queen that Cersei was warned about in Maggy’s prophecy. What wacky hijinks will she get up to in the North? Will she find a stable romance? Will she secure grain for Winter?

(HBO)

3. Jon Snow Goes Solo

Jon Snow’s punishment for murdering his girlfriend and Queen Daenerys was to be returned to Castle Black to serve out his life on the Night’s Watch. Although there may not be a reason for Castle Black anymore given that the wildlings can more or less move freely throughout the North and beyond the wall, and the threat of the wights and White Walkers is exterminated, Jon’s return to where he began the show is a sort of divine justice, and may have actually been what he wanted. After all, his final scene in the series shows him smiling just a little bit as he rides his horse out beyond the wall with Ghost, his beloved direwolf, his best friend Tormund, and a group of wildlings that he helped save from the Long Night. Seeing him beyond the wall for the next decade or so would be really thrilling stuff. Will he find someone to talk to about all of his girlfriends dying in his arms? Will he find love again, or will Ghost find someone to make babies with? Will he and Tormund star in their own buddy comedy?

(HBO)

4. Drogon 24/7

Poor Drogon. All he’s known is a life of pain and war. When he was born to his mother, he had two siblings, Rhaegal and Viserion, and both of them die within a few months of one another. He also has to deal with the fact that he’s a weapon of war and, given the fact that he is deeply intelligent, might have known the destruction he was razing on a city of half a million Westerosi citizens. That must have hurt. To top it off, all that sacrifice and his mom dies like five minutes after the battle? Let’s see a spin-off of wherever the hell Drogon goes with his mom’s body after her death. Is it to Valyria? Does he return to his birthplace? Does he take her body to dragonstone? Even King Bran wants to know! And that’s why we deserve a spin-off!

(HBO)

5. Grey Worm Relaxes

Grey Worm reveals in his last scene of the series that he is going to liberate Naath with the Unsullied. Naath is the place that he and Missandei discussed going to after their less-than-friendly reception upon their arrival to Winterfell. The beaches, Missandei said, were what she missed the most. That he and the Unsullied are going there is a fitting end to his character arc, but most importantly, it’s a new land to explore and it would be great to see Grey Worm find happiness after being trained from birth to be a soldier and then finding love and a purpose and losing them both in about one week. He deserves better! Will he finally put his toes in the sand? Will he get to relax and take off the armor? We’ll never know, but it would be nice too!

This article originally appeared on Fatherly. Follow @FatherlyHQ on Twitter.

MIGHTY MOVIES

The Marine who bought a Harrier now has a reality show

Remember that guy who bought a Harrier? Well, now, Art Nalls is adding reality TV star to his resume as the only civilian owner of a Harrier jump jet.


According to a release by AARP Studios, Nalls is starring in Badass Pilot, which tells the tale of how he acquired a British Aerospace Sea Harrier FA2 retired by the Fleet Air Arm and made it into a civilian warbird. The series premiered Nov. 14 on the YouTube page of AARP Studios.

Royal Navy crewmen aboard the Invincible-class aircraft carrier HMS Illustrious (R06), prepare a 801 Naval Air Squadron BAe Sea Harrier FA2 for take off from the flight deck on 12 March 1998. (Navy photo by PHC Alexander C. Hicks)

“I think the title of this show says it all. Art is, in fact, a badass pilot, and the perfect example or embodiment of how age doesn’t define anything,” AARP Studios Vice President Jeffrey Eagle said in the release. “Art certainly answers the question ‘How do you become the only civilian to own a Sea Harrier Fighter jet?’ but there’s a lot more to the series than that. Art’s purchase of the plane was just the beginning of the adventure.”

Also read: This music legend stole a helicopter and landed it at Johnny Cash’s house

Nalls has been taking the Sea Harrier to air shows around the country, including to Syracuse to pay tribute to a fallen Blue Angel in 2016. This is the first Harrier to have been owned by a civilian, although there was a 1996 attempt by John Leonard to claim one from Pepsi.

A Sea Harrier pilot of No 801 Squadron in his cockpit on HMS Invincible’s flight deck. (UK MOD Photo)

The Sea Harrier entered service with the Fleet Air Arm in 1978. Four years later, it proved instrumental in winning the Falklands War while flying from the carriers HMS Invincible and HMS Hermes (and, later, from the INS Vikrant). The Royal Air Force, United States Marine Corps, India, Spain, Italy, and Thailand have all flown versions of the Harrier.

According to MilitaryFactory.com, the Sea Harrier has a top speed of 734 miles per hour, a maximum range of 2,237 miles, and carries up to 5,000 pounds of ordnance. It’s able to carry various air-to-air missiles, including the AIM-9 Sidewinder, AIM-132 ASRAAM, and the AIM-120 AMRAAM.