8 tips for 'skating' in the military
Each year thousands of men and women enter the military with different expectations. Some end up making their military service a career, while others call it a day after completing their first contract.
Whatever you decide, here's a few tips on making those first enlisted years as manageable as possible.
1. Learn To Negotiate
It's well known that the E-4 and below run the show. Since you probably fall into this demographic, you get told what to do more than you get to tell others.
Find out a few job perks your MOS or rate has that others may value and consider trading goods or services for it.
For instance: There's a company-wide hike approaching, and you don't feel like taking part. Get to know the staff at your local medical clinic and strike up a deal to get you out in exchange for something you have or can do for them later.
2. Out Of Sight — Out Of Mind
Staying under the radar can take the time to plan and practice to master. Knowing every nook and cranny in your general area can be useful when the boss enters with a job in mind and you need a place to hide.
3. Request Special Liberty
Here's a sneaky little strategy that many might overlook.
Service members in good standing can get approved for free days off that won't count against their accumulated leave days. Commands don't advertise this option as much to their personnel when they submit single-day leave requests, but you can still ask for one.
The key to getting this option approved is to find a low-Karmic risk reason why you "need" a particular day off.
4. Volunteer for day time events
Morale, Wellness, and Recreation, or "MWR" is a non-profit organization that sponsors various entertainment events that are intended to boost the morale of all active duty members. The MWR members are primarily made up of volunteers themselves and are constantly looking for help.
The majority of MWR events are held during the afternoon. So you may have to cut out of work early to attend — and who wants to do that, right?
5. Put on a serious face
Most people tend to avoid conversation with another person who appears to be in deep thought or a bad mood. So use this look to your advantage when you just don't feel like listening to people.
Consider using a prop like a clipboard to strengthen the effect.
Team America (Source: Paramount/Screenshot)
6. Have a lookout
Skating isn't always a solo effort — it can sometimes take a whole team to pull off correctly.
Your seniors were at some point a part of the E-4 Mafia where they learned the art of skating. Depending on your location, you may not have the proper viewing to spot when your first sergeant or chief comes barreling around the corner discovering you and your comrades playing grab ass.
Consider putting a lookout in a designed spot to warn everyone of the inbound coffee mug holding boss breaches the area. Also take turns on the lookout position. No one wants to only hear the fun.
Boatswain's Mate Seaman Apprentice Paul Coombs uses the "big eyes" to locate surface contacts while standing port forward lookout watch on the island structure aboard t aircraft carrier USS John C. Stennis (U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 3rd Class Walter M. Wayman/Released)
7. Roll Call
Another one that calls for some backup.
The military's made up of a lot of moving parts. People come and go handling various tasks throughout the day.
As long as you're accounted for during roll call, you've pretty much got the upper hand on skating through whatever job lies ahead.
When a roll call starts, someone holding a clipboard, probably sporting a serious face like we talked about earlier will sound off a list of names from a sheet of paper. Once they hear the word "here!" shouted back to them they assume that's the person they just called out for even if they haven't lifted their eyes from the paper.
This works if the person calling out the names can't put faces to those names or is in on the "skating."
Have your buddies' back if they are off skating somewhere, just make sure when you do it, they repay the favor.
8. Get your driver's license
Driving a military vehicle on base requires the operator to have a special license. Getting the qualification can take some practice and concentration, but once you familiarize yourself with the multi-ton vehicle, you become an asset to the higher ups now that you can drive them around.
Instead of taking part in a 10-mile hike in a full combat load, you could drive the safety vehicle. Think about it.
Can you think of any other? Comment below.