The most ridiculous weapons ever designed - We Are The Mighty
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The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

From homemade tanks to nuclear landmines kept warm by chickens, war brings out the engineers in people. When a weapons system works, it’s made by the thousands, and sometimes used for decades. But when it doesn’t, it’s quickly added to the dustbin of bad ideas. Many of these ridiculous, odd, and exceptionally weird weapons were developed by militaries all over the world, but either proved impractical or were canceled before production.


The Most Ridiculous (Real) Weapons Used Throughout History

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NOW: The 7 weirdest nuclear weapons ever developed

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6 pearls of wisdom we learned from War Daddy in ‘Fury’

Many Hollywood war movies focus on the action-packed set pieces that go into the film’s trailer, leaving out a lot of room for the character elements that elevate good stories.


When David Ayer’s “Fury” debuted in theaters, the film’s realistic and diverse characters like Gordo, Bible, and the seasoned Don “War Daddy” Collier made audiences feel the dangers of being a tanker in WWII.

Brad Pitt plays the German speaking tank commander War Daddy must to deploy his leadership skills to manage the different personalities that make up his crew.

Related: 5 nuggets of wisdom in ‘Black Hawk Down’ you may have missed

So check out how War Daddy commanded his troops.

1. Never let them see you cry

No one said you can’t have feelings while you’re deployed in a combat zone, but leaders have to control their emotions to help maintain order. That’s exactly what War Daddy did after losing a crew member as he walked off for a moment of self-reflection.

War Daddy reminds us every great warrior needs a moment. (Images via Giphy)

2. Make your expectations clear

The Army quickly replaces the fallen crew member with an untrained boy named, Norman.

War Daddy gives the newly assigned tanker some sage advice for the hell he’s about to witness.

It sounds cold-hearted, but it’s realistic advice. (Images via Giphy)

3. Rank doesn’t always have its privileges

It not uncommon that war films feature both the war-hardened and the inexperienced “shot caller” tropes. But having a high-rank insignia on your collar or sleeve is only as good as the man wearing the shirt. Write that down.

True leaders get true reactions from their comrades. (Images via Giphy) 

4. Live in the moment

Having fought the Germans for a good amount of time and seeing plenty of death, War Daddy knows the importance of embracing a special moment.

To feel alive in a time of death is priceless. (Images via Giphy) 

5. Take care of each other

Even though their world is currently under a pile of sh*t, they still have their brotherhood and it’s stronger than ever.

Words only veterans can relate too. (Images via Giphy)

Also Read: 8 life lessons from ‘Major Payne’

6. Never run from a fight

Like War Daddy, many warriors are trained to fight, and fighting is all they know. So running away from a fight just isn’t a part of the plan.

With the odds were stacked up against them. They all stayed and fought. That’s their duty. (Images via Giphy)

Articles

10 symbols of NASA’s amazing legacy

From a one-man capsule to the space shuttle, here are ten facts about America’s space program that will remind you of NASA’s amazing history and the legacy of dedication and service on the part of all who’ve worked there over the years.


The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Wally Schirra was the only one of the Mercury 7 astronauts to fly in all three of NASA’s ‘Moon Shot’ programs (Mercury, Gemini and Apollo). Alan Shepard flew in Mercury and Apollo, but not in Gemini. Gus Grissom was involved in all three projects, flying in Mercury and Gemini, but he was killed during a pre-flight simulation in his Apollo 1 capsule, so he never actually flew in the Apollo program. (NASA.gov)

 

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Gus Grissom was the only Mercury astronaut to give his capsule a name: Molly Brown. (NASA.gov)

 

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Alan Shepard used a modified six iron during the Apollo 14 mission in 1971. NASA planners were unaware that he’d carried the device with him on the mission. Shepard later presented the folding club to comedian Bob Hope, an avid golfer beloved by the military. (NASA.gov)

 

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
President Bill Clinton and First Lady Hillary Clinton are the only First Couple to watch a shuttle launch in person. They watched John Glenn’s return to Space on STS-95 on October 29, 1998 from the Kennedy Space Center. President Obama had planned to watch the shuttle Endeavour lift off on its final mission, STS-134, on April 29, 2011, but that launch was delayed. (NASA.gov)

 

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Astronaut Kathy Sullivan was first U.S. woman to perform a spacewalk, accomplishing the feat during the shuttle Challenger’s mission (STS-41G) in October of 1984. (NASA.gov)

 

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Norm Thagard became the first American astronaut to ride aboard a Russian Soyuz rocket when he joined two Russian cosmonauts in blasting off from the Baikonur Cosmodrome in Kazakstan on March 14, 1995. The Mir 18 mission lasted 115 days. (NASA.gov)

 

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
On Feb. 9, 1995, Bernard Harris, payload specialist aboard STS-63, became the first African-American to walk in space. This photo shows Harris and mission specialist C. Michael Foale in the airlock chamber just before exiting the shuttle. (NASA.gov)

 

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
The shuttle Columbia flew 28 flights (including the first shuttle mission), spent 300.74 days in space, completed 4,808 orbits, and flew a total of 125,204,911 miles. The shuttle met a tragic end in 2003 when it was destroyed on re-entry, killing all seven astronauts aboard.

 

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Pushing out the boundaries of space exploration has taken a human toll. Eighteen NASA astronauts have died in the course of carrying out the mission: three on Apollo 1, one on X-15-3, seven on Challenger, and seven on Columbia.

 

Lists

The 19 most game-changing weapons of the 21st century

We’ve come a long way since the stealth bomber.


Just as smart gadgets have invaded our homes and revolutionized our lives over the last 15 years, next-level weaponry has transformed the military.

The imperatives of the military have always been one of the main drivers of technological development.

ARPANET, one of the internet’s most important precursors was a Pentagon project, while most of the technology in an iPhone originated with the US Department of Defense.

Today, militaries all over the world are still pushing technological boundaries. Since the turn of the millennium, weapons featuring a vast range of technical sophistication have proven to be game changers.

Everything from concealed roadside bombs — cheap, primitive, and deadly  — to multibillion-dollar aerial lasers have transformed conventional methods of combat and altered the world’s technological and political landscape.

Here are 19 of the most important weapons of the last 15 years.

Massive Ordnance Penetrator bombs

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: Wikimedia Commons

America’s largest conventional bomb is precision-guided, 20 feet long, weighs 30,000 pounds, and can blast through underground bunkers.

Boeing’s Massive Ordnance Penetrator (MOP) bomb is designed to pierce 60 feet of reinforced concrete and then detonate 200 feet underground — making no bunker safe.

After the MOP’s first successful test in 2007, the US Air Force ordered an arsenal of these mega-bombs.

The Chinese anti-satellite program

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: Wikimedia Commons

In January of 2007, China initiated a new and terrifying era in warfare. Using a C-19 ballistic missile, the People’s Liberation Army destroyed an out-of-commission weather satellite flying over 500 miles above the surface of Earth.

In a single widely condemned move, China had militarized outer space. It was a move that might have been inevitable, but whose long-term consequences are startling. If satellites were considered legitimate military targets, attacks could create debris fields that would knock out entire orbits or create chain reactions that might destroy vital communications and global-positioning satellites. Similarly, countries could deploy weapons to outer space capable of destroying terrestrial targets once the global taboo against space warfare is obliterated.

If that alarming worst-case scenario ever comes to pass, future generations could identify the successful 2007 test as the moment that space became a military frontier. The test also displayed China’s eagerness to develop weapons that its rivals would never use — showing how a state can use asymmetrical means to close the gap with it more powerful rivals.

The X-47B

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: Northrop Grumman

The Navy’s X-47B is a strike-fighter-sized unmanned aircraft with the potential to completely change aerial warfare.

Northrop Grumman’s drone is capable of aerial refueling, 360-degree rolls, and offensive weapon deployment. It’s carried out the first autonomous aerial refueling in aviation history, and has taken off and landed from an aircraft carrier.

It cruises at half the speed of sound, and has a wingspan of 62 feet — as well as a range of at least 2,400 miles, which is more than twice that of the Reaper drone.

Reaper drones

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: Wikimedia Commons

The M19 Reaper drone has radically changed the way that the US carries out military operations. First released in 2001, the Reaper drone has been used in surveillance operations and strikes against militants in places ranging from Iraq to Somalia to Pakistan.

Reaper drones are built to be effective at both surveillance and air support. The drones are capable of reading a license plate from over two miles away while at an altitude of 52,000 feet.

The drones can also carry 500-pound bombs and both air-to-ground missiles and air-to-air missiles. Capable of staying airborne for 36 hours, the drone has given the US a remarkable ability to strike targets quickly and quietly around the world — and without risking personnel in the process.

The V-22 Osprey

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: Senior Airman Julianne Showalter/USAF

The V-22 Osprey is a multitask tilt rotor aircraft that has become a staple of the Marine Corps since its introduction into service. The Osprey can take off and land vertically like a helicopter, but it can also travel at speeds approaching that of a fixed-wing plane.

The Osprey originally suffered from several worrisome accidents, including a series of fatal crashes, before it was officially introduced into service in 2007. The plane’s later models have now become absolutely indispensable for the Marines. It has seen use in combat and rescue operations as far afield as Iraq, Afghanistan, and Libya.

The Air Force, Navy, and Marines have used the Osprey for almost every conceivable mission. It has been used for troop transport, MEDEVAC missions, supply transport, and aerial delivery; it is also being tested for use as an aerial refueling platform. As it can land vertically, the Osprey is also able to take part in operations normally out of bounds for traditional aircraft, which typically need hundreds of feet of runway space.

Boost-glide hypersonic weapons

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: Wikimedia Commons

Boost-glide hypersonic weapons are the latest arena in which the US and China are competing militarily. Neither country has quite developed a working advanced hypersonic weapon (AHW) prototype, but the two countries both tested their own versions in August 2014.

Boost-glide weapons can hit their targets with unprecedented speed and effectiveness. If they ever become operable, these weapons would be able to deliver weapons payloads while traveling at a velocity five times faster than the speed of sound over a range of several thousand miles.

Boost-glide weapons are capable of traveling on a trajectory that makes them difficult for missile-defense systems to intercept, since those systems are designed to work against the high arc of traditional ballistic missiles. Boost-glide projectiles travel quickly and at a flat angle, working at speeds and trajectories that flummox existing missile defense technologies.

These weapons could deliver nuclear warheads faster and better than anything ever built, and experts fear that they could spark a new arms race.

Seaborne Tomahawk Missiles

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
A Tomahawk missile, guided by an F/A-18 Super Hornet hits a moving maritime target. (Photo: YouTube)

On January 27, the Navy carried out a successful test of a steerable marine-launched Tomahawk missile. Guided by an F/A-18E/F Super Hornet, the modified missile was able to change directions in flight and hit a moving maritime target.

“This is potentially a game-changing capability for not a lot of cost,” Deputy Secretary of Defense Bob Work said at the WEST 2015 conference. “It’s a 1,000-mile anti-ship cruise missile.”

The new converted Tomahawks would have a range of almost 1,000 nautical miles, allowing the US to maintain a considerable edge over rival naval powers. On the other side of the Pacific, one of China’s most threatening new military advancements is its development of its own advanced anti-ship cruise missiles. While potentially threatening to US ships, these missiles would have just half the range of the converted Tomahawk.

THAAD missiles

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: Raytheon

The most advanced missile system on the planet can hunt and blast incoming missiles right out of the sky with a 100% success rate — from a truck, no less.

With its unmatched precision, the Terminal High-Altitude Area Defense (THAAD) system can equalize conflicts around the world. With its mobility and strategic battery-unit placement, the THAAD can close the gap between mismatched military forces and take away an enemy’s aerial advantage.

Impressively, the THAAD missile does not carry a warhead, instead using pure kinetic energy to deliver “hit-to-kill” lethality to ballistic missiles inside or outside of Earth’s atmosphere. Each launcher carries up to eight missiles and can send multiple kill vehicles, depending on the severity of the threat.

The YAL Airborne Laser Testbed

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
The YAL Airborne Laser Testbed’s turret assembly. (Photo: YouTube)

Weaponized lasers will likely be a feature on the battlefield of the future. Even though only one of the weapons was ever built and the program has been discontinued, the YAL Airborne Laser Testbed was an important proof of concept.

The American weapon, which was first tested successfully in 2007, was housed inside a converted 747 aircraft. The plane had the largest laser turret ever built installed on its nose. The laser was built to intercept tactical ballistic missiles midway through their flight path; in a 2010 test, the YAL succeeded in shooting down a test target.

The military decided the YAL was impractical — in order to intercept a missile, the aircraft would have to already be in the air, while the weapon itself was expensive to fabricate, operate, and maintain. Still, it demonstrated that enormous, high-powered lasers could destroy large and fast-moving objects, and do so in midair. 

If lasers ever become a feature of aerial combat, it will be because of the precedent of the YAL.

The Laser Weapon System

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: YouTube

The Navy’s Laser Weapon System, or LaWS, is a ship-mounted weaponized laser that can burn through enemy targets in less than 30 seconds.

The energy used to deploy a single LaWS laser shot costs approximately $1 compared to the traditional SM-2, a similar surface-to-air system that runs $400,000 per missile.

Earlier this year, Boeing signed a contract with the US Navy to upgrade the current software used on the laser system.

Stuxnet

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: Wikimedia Commons

In 2010, a malicious computer program swept through Iran’s nuclear infrastructure. Stuxnet caused uranium enrichment centrifuges to inexplicably fail and knocked out as much as 20% of Iran’s enrichment capacity. The computer worm essentially slowed Iran’s nuclear efforts, raising the pressure on Tehran and buying the US and its allies some valuable time to build up international opposition to the country’s program.

Stuxnet was a turning point in the modern history of warfare. It was a state-sponsored hack, a computer program likely built by the US and Israel in order to influence the behavior of a rival government. It arguably worked, to a degree — Iran’s program was slowed; the international community tightened its sanctions regime; the Iranian economy teetered on the brink of collapse, and the conditions for the current negotiations slid into place.

But it also set a precedent for governments hacking one another and hashing out their disagreements in the cyber realm. The North Korean hack of Sony is arguably the next step in the process and shows how cyber weapons may be so hard to control now that they’ve been introduced into international affairs.

Iron Dome

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: Wikimedia Commons

Ever since Hezbollah rained hundreds of rockets over northern Israel during a July 2006 escalation in hostilities, projectile attacks have been the country’s most pressing security challenge. There have been some 15,000 rocket attacks on the country since 2001, including attacks from Iranian and Russian-made missiles capable of hitting Israel’s major population centers.

The Iron Dome antimissile battery is capable of tracking the trajectory of an incoming projectile and then launching an interceptor that detonates the missile at a safe altitude. Iron Dome saves lives on both sides of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict: Hamas rocket attacks during flare-ups in 2012 and 2014 killed few people inside of Israel even including days in which more than 100 rockets were fired. Without Iron Dome, the death toll would have been far higher in both conflicts and Israel’s response might have been even more protracted.

Iron Dome was developed by a state-owned Israeli defense company to face a specific threat and therefore has little battlefield applicability beyond the country’s borders. But it’s one of the primary modern examples of a country mustering all of its technological resources to solve a highly specialized and difficult security problem. In an era where large, set-piece battles between armies and traditional battlefield tactics may be a thing of the past, this may be the kind of the military edge that ends up counting the most.

Heat rays

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: Wikimedia Commons

Both China and the US have developed nonlethal “heat rays” that cause extreme pain and can aid in crowd control. The general idea behind the weapons is to heat the water just below the surface of a person’s skin so as to induce pain, causing the target to flee without inflicting death or incapacitation.

The Chinese heat ray can target individuals at up to 262 feet away. When hooked up to an extra power source, the beam can hit targets at distances of 0.6 miles.

The US version of the heat ray, known as the Active Denial System (ADS), had a range of 1,000 meters and could raise the temperature of a target’s skin by 130 degrees. However, the ADS was recalled by the US military without ever having been used over questions of its ethical application.

Bullets that can change direction in flight

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: DARPA

Extreme Accuracy Tasked Ordnance (EXACTO) are bullets that can change their path during flight to correct for the movement of a target or any other factors that might have driven the projectile off-course.

The bullets feature optical tips that can detect guidance lasers focused on a target. Tiny fins on the bullets then guide the bullet towards that laser. The Pentagon just successfully conducted a live-fire test utilizing these rounds.

If fully implemented, these rounds could drastically improve the accuracy of US soldiers. The weapons would also help reduce the risks of friendly-fire incidents or of stray bullets harming civilians.

The Golden Hour blood container

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: Jason Johnston/US Army

This isn’t a weapon — but it’s still a game changer.

The Golden Hour, developed by US Army scientists in 2003, helped keep US soldiers alive after suffering a major battlefield injury. The box-like thermal container preserved red blood cells at a temperature that would prevent donor blood from dying under harsh environmental conditions in Iraq and Afghanistan — all without having to use electricity, batteries, or ice to moderate the blood’s temperature.

If soldiers were injured on the battlefield, there would be life-saving donor blood immediately on hand in small and easily portable containers that require no actual energy input. This allows medics to perform transfusions quickly and efficiently when soldiers’ lives are most at risk.

The container shows that not every major battlefield development is weapons related, and it demonstrates just how far technology has come in saving soldiers’ lives.

Improvised explosive devices

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: Cpl. Alfred Lopez/USMC

Every era of modern warfare has had weapons that closed the gap between powerful state militaries and nonstate militant groups. During the Cold War, rebel groups around the world used the cheap and plentiful AK-47 to defeat far larger armies around the world.

The roadside bomb is how insurgents in Iraq and Afghanistan bogged down a far larger and more powerful US military. Camouflaged “improvised explosive devices,” often hidden in cars or potholes, could be detonated using cell phones. They could also be built quickly and covertly, and without a huge amount of engineering expertise.

IEDs killed as many as 3,100 US soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan, representing around two-thirds of total US combat deaths. The bombs prevented the US from winning in both countries through conventional means, leading to technological developments like the MRAP and a shift to counterinsurgency strategy in both wars. IEDs have arguably transformed the US military and its mission like no other modern weapon.

Roadside bombs showed how in the 21st century, it’s still possible for a small and technologically primitive military force to wreak havoc on a larger and infinitely better-equipped one.

Mine-Resistant Ambush-Protected vehicles

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: Wikimedia Commons

The US was in huge trouble in Iraq in 2005. The American-led mission was losing ground to a growing insurgency led by Al Qaeda elements. And the US was suffering huge losses from improvised explosive devices that would rip through even heavily armored vehicles. Insurgents were setting bombs that would detonate under American personnel carriers, which weren’t built to withstand the insurgents’ weaponry.

The heavily armored MRAP was designed, developed, and built in a matter of months to counter the US’ biggest operational challenge in Iraq; by 2009 over 21,000 of them were in service.

Developed on an accelerated schedule, the MRAP reduced US casualties from mine and IED attacks by 80%. And it provided the US and its allies with a vehicle that could operate in a new, challenging combat environment.

Four-tube night-vision goggles

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: USAF

Each member of Navy SEAL Team Six is issued $65,000 four-tube night-vision goggles, according to Navy SEAL Matt Bissonnette in his book, “No Easy Day.”

Compared to the standard two-tube goggles, which Bissonnette says are similar to binoculars, the four-tube model gives soldiers a greatly expanded field of view.

The Ground Panoramic Night Vision Goggles are made in Londonderry, New Hampshire, by L-3 Warrior Systems’ Insight division, Defense One reports.

Since 2010, the Pentagon has spent at least $12.5 million on this elite military eyewear, according to Defense One.

The Ghost hovercraft

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Photo: YouTube

Developed by Juliet Marine Systems, the Ghost could become one of the military’s ships of the future.

Propped on two blade-like pontoons, the Ghost cuts through the water while maintaining enhanced balance. The design allows the ship to reduce friction and increase its stability.

The ship has also been designed for maximum stealth. It is nonmagnetic and hard to detect via sonar, making it ideal for infiltration and surveillance of enemy waters.

The Ghost can also deploy a range of offensive weapons that are similar to what an attack helicopter would carry. The vessel can be equipped with Gatling guns, Griffin missiles, and rockets launched either from its hull or from the craft’s skin.

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This article originally appeared at Business Insider Defense Copyright 2015. Follow BI Defense on Twitter.

Articles

These Are The US Army’s Top Five Photos Of 2014

The U.S. Army announced Friday the top five photos its photographers took in 2014, and the decision for which shot earned the top honor was left to the public on Facebook.


The process of selecting the best pictures “involved a yearlong photo search and compilation” by Army public affairs, according to the news release. The Army then put the images out to the public on Facebook where they counted up “likes” and “shares.”

With a Facebook “like” count of 2,600, this photo from Christopher Bodin of a 25-Black Hawk helicopter convoy is the best of 2014.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Pilots, from 2nd Battalion (Assault), 2nd Aviation Regiment and 3rd General Support Aviation Battalion, flew in more than 300 Republic of Korea and U.S. Marines on 25 UH-60 Black Hawk helicopters for an air assault, March 13, 2014, on the multipurpose range complex.

Coming in a close second with 2,300 Facebook “likes,” this shot from Sgt. 1st Class Abram Pinnington is a powerful reminder of the sacrifices soldiers made on Omaha Beach in World War II.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
A French child, dressed as an American World War II Soldier stands tall, June 6, 2014, while saluting the sands of Omaha Beach, France. The boy, never breaking composure, stood for more than two hours during a 1st Infantry Division ceremony that helped commemorate the 70th anniversary of the D-Day landings.

This shot that show’s CH-47F Chinook helicopters transporting Humvees, taken by Staff Sgt. Joel Salgado, garnered 1,300 Facebook “likes.”

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

This photo taken in October by Sgt. Mark Brejcha highlights soldiers training at the Leaders Reaction Course at Fort Hood. It received 1,200 Facebook “likes.”

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Warrior Diplomat Soldiers from Headquarters and Headquarters Company, 85th Civil Affairs Brigade, work as teams to negotiate obstacles at the Leaders Reaction Course on Fort Hood, Texas, Oct. 9, 2014.

The photo taken by Sgt. Daniel Stoutamire, which received 1,100 Facebook “likes,” depicts a somber milestone for the Army. It was taken in March 2014 at the funeral of Walter D. Ehlers, the last surviving recipient of the Medal of Honor during the D-Day invasion of World War II.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
Walter D. Ehlers, the last surviving recipient of the Medal of Honor to participate in the D-Day invasion of Normandy during World War II, passes away at 92 years old. Soldiers, with 2nd Armored Brigade Combat Team, 1st Infantry Division, fold the Medal of Honor flag next to Walter D. Ehlers’ casket during a memorial service, March 8, 2014, at the Riverside National Cemetery in Riverside, Calif.

NOW: Check out many more incredible photos the Army took in 2014

Articles

The 15 coolest unit nicknames in the US military

Every unit in the military has a nickname, but some are way cooler than others. We looked around for some of the best nicknames across the military. Here’s what we found:


1. Hell On Wheels

2nd Armored Division, US Army: The 2nd Armored Division was active from 1940 to 1995 and was once commanded by Gen. Patton. It played an important role during World War II and was deactivated shortly after the Gulf War. Gen. Patton gave the unit the nickname after witnessing its maneuvers in 1941.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

2. Old Iron Sides

1st Armored Division, US Army: The “Old Ironsides” nickname was given by Maj. Gen. Bruce R. Magruder after Gen. Patton named his division “Hell on Wheels.” Feeling that his division should have an awesome nickname too, Magruder announced a contest to find a suitable name before settling on “Old Ironsides,” as an homage to the famous Navy warship.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

3. Bloody Bucket

28th Infantry Division, US Army: Originally nicknamed “Keystone Division,” the unit acquired the nickname “Bloody Bucket” by German forces during World War II because the red keystone patch resembled a bucket.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

4. Red Bull

34th Infantry Division, US Army: This National Guard unit participated in World War I and World War II and was deactivated in 1945. It was once again activated in 1991 and since 2001 its soldiers have served in Afghanistan, Iraq and homeland security operations.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

5. Yellow Jackets

Electronic Attack Squadron 138 (VAQ-138), US Navy: This EA-18G Growler squadron based out of Whidbey Island, WA has a fitting name for what it does. It buzzes adversaries with electronic attacks rendering them useless.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

6. Gunslingers

Strike Fighter Squadron 105 (VFA-105), US Navy: This squadron was originally commissioned in 1952 as the “Mad Dogs” and was decommissioned in 1959. It was recommissioned as the “Gunslingers” in 1969 to participate in combat operations in the Gulf of Tonkin and has remained active ever since.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

7. Diamondbacks

Strike Fighter Squadron 102 (VFA-102), US Navy: Based out of NAF Atsugi, Japan, the Diamondbacks are attached to Carrier Air Wing 5 and deploys aboard the USS George Washington (CVN-73).

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

8. Bounty Hunters

Strike Fighter Squadron 2 (VFA-2), US Navy: Based out of Naval Air Station Lemoore, CA, this F/A-18F Super Hornet Squadron is attached to Carrier Air Wing 2 and deploys aboard the USS Ronald Reagan (CVN-76).

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

9. The Professionals

2nd Battalion, 1st Marines, U.S. Marine Corps: Based out of Camp Pendleton, CA, this infantry battalion consists of about 1000 Marines and sailors.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

10. Betio Bastards

3rd Battalion 2nd Marines, US Marine Corps: Based out of Camp Lejeune, NC, this infantry battalion has about 800 Marines and sailors.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

11. Destroyers

2nd Light Armored Reconnaissance Battalion, US Marine Corps: Based out of Camp Lejeune, NC, this battalion’s primary weapon is the 8-wheeled LAV-25.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

12. Magnificent Bastards

2nd Battalion, 4the Marines, U.S. Marine Corps: Based out of Camp Pendleton, CA, this infantry battalion has about 1,100 Marines and sailors.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

13. Kickin’ Ass

148 Fighter Squadron, US Air Force: Based out of Tucson Air National Guard Base, AZ, this F-16A/B Fighting Falcon squadron’s main role is to train foreign military pilots.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

14. Headhunters

80th Fighter Squadron, US Air Force: Based out of Kunsan Air Force Base, South Korea, this F-16 Fighting Falcon squadron has served in operations in World War II, the Korean War, and the Vietnam War.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

15. Rocketeers

336th Fighter Squadron, US Air Force: Based out of Seymour Johnson Air Force Base, NC, the “Rocketeers played key roles during Operation Desert Storm dropping more than six million pounds of ordnance on scud missile sites, bridges and airfields.

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed

 

NOW: 19 of the coolest military unit mottos

OR: The 7 biggest ‘Blue Falcons’ in US military history

Lists

6 surprising things that are against the laws of war

They may seem like they’re tying troops’ hands behind their backs — especially given that today’s wars are very different from those when the former laws of war were written — but there’s a good reason why certain rules have been imposed to protect troops in combat.


Though not every country ratified all of the protocols of the Geneva Convention, and fewer still signed the Hague Conventions of 1899 and 1907, many still hold to the general provisions and restrictions.

The laws of war contain a lot of things that make sense. Don’t hurt civilians. Don’t attack places of worship or medical aid. They may seem small at first glance, but they are a line US troops cannot cross.

While the major laws of war are well known, there are some provisions that may surprise the average reader.

#1: Filing down your bullet. (The 1899 Hague Declaration IV,3 and Geneva Convention Protocol I Art. 35)

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
(Screen grab via YouTube)

There is always the loophole of “military necessity” — that’s why flamethrowers are okay, because they have an actual purpose if used on foliage and clearing tunnels.

So while hollow points are legal, filing down a bullet to make in improvised dum-dum round is a no no. The purpose of doing that is to cause unnecessary harm.

So that 5.56 round some jackass took a Multi-tool to to “make it hurt more” committed a serious offense.

#2: A chaplain picking up a weapon. (Geneva Convention Art. 24)

The most ridiculous weapons ever designed
(U.S. Air Force photo by Airman 1st Class Sean Campbell)

If troops become shipwrecked or parachute out of a destroyed aircraft, they now have non-combatant status. They’re technically out of the fight.

The most protected service member in the ranks is still the chaplain, who should never enter combatant status.

Regardless of their denomination, chaplains have a duty to uphold the spiritual, moral, and religious well-being of everyone on the battlefield. They will enter combat zones, but only to provide aid. To date, 419 U.S. Chaplains have died in war and eight Medals of Honor were bestowed to chaplains.

It is a part of their duty to never lose non-combatant status to help the needs of all. Picking up a weapon immediately revokes that status. If you ever wondered why armed chaplain assistants are so valuable, that’s why.

#3: Taking war trophies. (Fourth Geneva Convention. Art. 33-34)

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There’s a fine line between taking a souvenir and pillaging.

Anything you take off the battlefield is pillaging — even if it belonged to an enemy combatant. It is subject to strict regulations after it’s turned over for inspection and clearance. If it’s a weapon, it must also be made unserviceable at the expense of whomever is taking it back.

Stashing it goes against tons of laws.

#4: Putting a large Red Cross on your equipment for combat operations. (Geneva Convention Protocol I Art. 85)

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(U.S. Army photo by Spc. JD Sacharok, Operations Group, National Training Center)

The Red Cross, Red Crescent, Red Crystal, and Red Shield of David are all protected as the international symbol for medical aid. When it is painted on a vehicle or on an armband, it lets everyone know that they are only there to render aid. Like chaplains having protections, so too do medics if they are performing aid and evacuation.

If a combat medic takes up arms, they lose their status as a non-combatant, which has been the norm in modern conflicts. If they drop their weapon to give aid, they regain that status.

But the red cross symbol doesn’t give you noncombatant status. If the symbol is on a piece of equipment, such as a first aid kit or pack, it is only signifying that the contents are for first aid.

#5: Not protecting journalists. (Geneva Convention Protocol I Art. 79)

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Legendary BBC War Corespondent, Robin Duff, on D-Day (Image via BBC)

War corespondents are just as protected as any other civilian on the battlefield. They must never pick up arms or else they losing their status. The difference between members of the press and other non-combatants is that they are required by their job to be in the middle of a firefight to report what is happening.

In the modern era, journalists have been easier and more valuable targets than ever. If one is embedded in a unit, no matter how pesky and nosy as they seem, they are valuable assets to the war effort and still must be protected.

#6: Insulting prisoners of war. (Third Geneva Convention. Arts. 13-16)

Writer’s Note: For the final point on this list, there will not be a photograph of a prisoner of war, regardless of nationality, in reference to their mistreatment.

One of the goals of the Hague and Geneva Convention was to protect the rights of prisoners of war. They must be given medical attention (Art. 15). They keep the civil capacities they had at the time of capture (Art. 14) and must always be treated humanely (Art. 13).

The definition of humane treatment covers no physical mutilation (including torture). This also means you must provide protection from acts of violence, intimidation, and verbal insults.

It doesn’t matter who the person is or what they did before they are captured, they are now a prisoner of war.

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13 Funniest military memes for the week of April 28

We found these awesome military memes and thought you guys might like ’em. Here are 13 of the funniest we found:


1. When it’s the perfect new house until you see the address (via The Salty Soldier).

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Seems like some bases have a Jody Avenue, Street, Parkway, Broadway, and Highway.

2. Dang. Can’t even rollerblade?

(via Sh-t my LPO says)

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About all you could do there is masturbate.

ALSO SEE: Here is what a war with North Korea could look like

3. I would not be entirely surprised to learn that Mattis is a Jedi (via Why I’m Not Re-enlisting).

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Also wouldn’t be surprised to watch Mattis cut 100 enemies down with a lightsaber.

4. At least he warned everyone (via Pop smoke).

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5. Dangit, Air Force. If you would wear helmet bands, you could do it right (via Military World).

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It’s almost like the ground forces know how to do this job.

6. This Snapple fact is completely true (via Coast Guard Memes).

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And the pigeons were better than all humans, not just the non-rates. (But they only looked for red, orange, and yellow.)

7. See, my DD-214 won’t let me wake up before 8 a.m. (via CONUS Battle Drills).

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And yeah, it’s 8. Not 0800. ‘Cause of my DD-214 and all.

8. Better ratf-ck another MRE. No one is making it back for dinner chow (via Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said).

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I highly recommend the brisket. Or getting better coaches on the firing line. Either or.

9. Everyone in their reenlistment window, remember that rapidly expanding the military requires lots of people and that means it’s a re-enlistee’s market (via Coast Guard Memes).

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You at least got station of choice or something, right?

10. Huh. Guess I should change out of my Converse before I smoke this dude (via Decelerate Your Life).

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Meh. Not really worth it.

11. This gets dark quickly (via Military Memes).

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Also, it’s not spying if you’re using a crew-served weapon on full auto.

12. Seriously, guys, it’s not that bad out here (via Why I’m Not Re-enlisting).

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Come use your GI Bill. There’s booze. And degrees. And jobs.

13. These missiles got attitude with altitude and they don’t need a plane to complete them.

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And thanks to someone’s royal screwup, it’s going to get a chance to prove it.

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The 10 best military-themed sketches from ‘Saturday Night Live’

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Photo: SNL/screenshot


Topical humor has always been a big part of Saturday Night Live history and there have been plenty of military stories in the news to inspire its writers over the last four decades. As the show celebrated its 40th anniversary with a three-hour special that aired on Sunday, February 15th, we’ve combed through the SNL archives and selected the 10 best military-themed sketches.

1. Bruce Willis wants to bring some John McClane-style Die Hard heroics to a Black Ops mission in Afghanistan.

2. General David Petraeus (Will Forte) testifies to Congress about the progress of the surge in Iraq.

3. It’s time to build a coalition to fight Iraq’s nuclear capabilities, but General Colin Powell (Kenan Thompson) seems to have turned into Fred Sanford since his retirement.

4. A TV pitchman (Harry Shearer) explains why you need to spend $50,000 on a Pentagon-approved MacDouglass Drummond wrench.

5. An Air Force fighter pilot (NASCAR driver Jeff Gordon) wins elementary school Career Day over carpet salesman Seth Meyers.

6. Weekend Update’s Seth Meyers examines the Winners Losers in the General David Petraeus/Paula Broadwell/Jill Kelley/General John Allen scandal.

7. Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld (Darrell Hammond) updates the media on progress after the United States invades Afghanistan.

8. Tired of the Congressional debate about whether to invade Iraq, Vice President Dick Cheney (Darrell Hammond) goes all Doctor Strangelove and rides a missile to Baghdad.

9. Test Pilot Mustang Calhoun (Dennis Quaid) is just plain crazy.

10. Two dumb Marines (Kevin Nealon and Dana Carvey) bring spies to the US Embassy in Moscow.

These just skim the surface. There are dozens of military-themed sketches from SNL. Tell us your favorites in the comments below.

More from Military.com:

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6 female military units you don’t want to mess with

Men aren’t the only ones lighting up their enemies on the battlefield. These 6 elite military units are staffed entirely by women.


1. Kurdish Women’s Defense Units

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Photo: flickr/free kurdistan

The Kurdish YPJ is a female militia that began in 2012 as part of the Kurdish resistance to ISIS and the al-Nusra Front. They’ve fought in numerous battles and have a psychological impact on the men they fight because ISIS fighters believe they can’t go to heaven if killed by a woman.

2. Russia’s female Spetsnaz

Spetsnaz has allowed female members for some time, and women have been incorporated into Spetsnav officer training in recent years. While most female Spetsnaz members are placed into co-ed units, some have been used in female detachments for foreign intelligence gathering and as “beacons” to lead in assaulting troops during a foreign raid or invasion.

3. Chinese Special Forces

China has a single female special forces unit. Based in Hong Kong, the unit boasts 50 highly-trained combatants.

4. Russian female airborne battalion

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jLiwRcOZhgI

These women train at the Russian airborne academy to become officers in charge of paratroopers. They learn how to conduct an airborne insertion, how best to maneuver as a unit on the battlefield, and how to shoot their enemies center mass.

5. Swedish Women’s Voluntary Defence Service

Commonly called the Lotta Corps, these women are part of the national defense plan for Sweden should it be invaded. They are trained in basic military tactics and strategy, but are a reserve force. Like the U.S. Army Reserves, their primary jobs are combat support or combat service support rather than frontline combat.

6. Libyan “Revolutionary Nuns”

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Photo: Wikipedia/James Gordon

Though it was disbanded following the Libyan Civil War, this elite cadre of bodyguards were key to dictator Muammar Gaddafi’s personal security. They were highly trained in firearms and martial arts. In an attack in 1998, one woman was killed after leaping onto Gaddafi while he was being shot at by Libyan rebels.

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6 unbelievable military love stories

1. A POW escaped prison to have an affair with the daughter of a Nazi worker

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A thin but defiant Horace Greasley stares down Heinrich Himmler during a prison inspection Photo: Wiki Commons


When Hitler invaded Czechoslovakia on September 1, 1939, 20-year-old British hairdresser Horace Greasley was drafted into the British Army.* Unfortunately, the aspiring barber was better with scissors than he was with a rifle, and he was captured and sent to a Polish POW camp almost immediately. Most people would be too devastated by this turn of events to even think about scoping out potential romantic opportunities, but Horace Greasley is not most people.

A few days into his imprisonment he met Rosa Raubach, the beautiful daughter of the camp’s quarry director, and the two began a secret affair that lasted for nearly a year before he was transferred to a different prison. But the story doesn’t end here — instead of giving up on his prison girlfriend, Horace decided he was up for a challenge, and continued the relationship under the Nazis’s noses. With the help of his friends he would crawl under a section of barbed wire fencing to escape back into his old prison and reunite with his lady love, rather than search for a way to neutral territory.

The pair kept up this forbidden rendezvous about three times a week for five years. Amazingly, Horace and Rosa were never found out by the Nazis — the only thing that stopped the couple was the liberation of Poland at the end of the war, when they went their separate ways.

2. This Civil War couple cross-dressed and became Union outlaws to defy the Confederacy

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Keith and Linda Balcok | Wiki Commons

Keith and Linda Balock loved the Union just as much as they loved each other, so when their home state of North Carolina sided with the Confederacy, they knew it was time to take drastic measures. Realizing that Keith would have to enlist in the Confederate army or risk imprisonment (and probably worse), the husband and wife swore to stay together — even on the front lines. Linda donned men’s clothes and posed as “Sam” Balock, Keith’s fictitious brother, and the pair entered the army together, planning to defect to the Union as soon as they reached Northern territory.

Before they could cross Union lines, however, Linda’s true identity was discovered, and she was forced to leave. Unwilling to be apart from his wife, Keith decided he would get himself discharged too. The next day he went out to the forest, stripped naked, and rolled around in poison ivy until he could convince Confederate doctors that he had an incurable disease. Once released, the pair fled to the Appalachian mountains, where they lived as Union raiders for the rest of the war and worked to sabotage Confederate military efforts.

3.  Two Jewish resistance leaders met in a concentration camp, fell in love, and planned their escape together

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Marla Zimetbaum before her capture, a prison photo Edward Gilenski | Wiki Commons

When 24-year-old Marla Zimetbaum was arrested and sent to Auschwitz-Birkenau because of her Jewish heritage, she vowed to do whatever it took to bring her Nazi oppressors down. What she didn’t realize at the time, however, was that she wouldn’t have to do it alone. While working as a prison interpreter, she met fellow inmate Edward Gilenksi, a young Polish man who was plotting his escape from the camp. She began crafting the escape plan with him, and the two young people, who were both rumored to have been part of Jewish resistance groups, fell in love.

In June of 1944, Gilenski disguised himself as an SS guard and Zimetbaum as a male prisoner, and they made it outside of the camp’s perimeter gate. Once there, Zimetbaum changed out of her men’s clothes and the pair pretended to be a Nazi and his girlfriend out for a walk.  They swore to stay together no matter what happened, and lived together in freedom for four days before Zimetbaum was discovered buying groceries and arrested. Keeping his promise, Gilenski turned himself in, and the two were tragically executed on the same day. Before their deaths the two reportedly rallied their fellow prisoners to continue the resistance against the Nazis, and became symbols of Jewish resistance against the Nazi regime.

4.  60 years after Stalin banished her family to Siberia, this Russian woman reunited with her husband

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Photo via the Telegraph

Only three days after his marriage to Anna Kozlov in 1946, Boris Kozlov had to return to fight with his Red Army unit in Communist Russia. The couple kissed goodbye and waved as Boris returned to his post, expecting to see each other again in a few weeks. They had no idea that they would not be reunited until 60 years later. After Boris left, Anna and her family were banished to Siberia during Stalin’s purges, and they were unavailable to leave word for any of their family or friends. When Boris returned home, expecting to be greeted by his beautiful young bride, he was crushed — she was nowhere to be found. Desperate, he scoured the town for news of her disappearance, but found nothing.

Meanwhile, Anna considered suicide, convinced she would never again see the love of her life. After a while and at the pressure of their families, they both reluctantly moved on and remarried, resigned to the fact that their marriage was not meant to be. Half a century later however, after the fall of the Soviet Union and the deaths of both their spouses, Anna returned to her hometown — and ran into Boris. She saw him getting out of his car while she walked about her old street, and the two miraculously recognized each other. They married each other again days later — finally leading the life they had dreamed of as young newlyweds.

 5. 20-year-old Olga Watkins infiltrated Dachau to find her Jewish fiance

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Olga Watkins sits with her fiance before his arrest Photo via Litverse

Olga Watkins was leading an ordinary, happy life when her fiance Julius Koreny was arrested by the Gestapo in 1943 and taken away. Devastated, she ignored the pleas of her family and friends to give up on Julius — who had surely been killed by the the Nazis — and instead set out to find him herself. Her quest led her on a 2,000 mile journey from Zagreb through Nazi-occupied Europe, to the gates of Dachau and finally Buchenwald, one of The Third Reich’s most notorious concentration camps.

Terrified but determined to free Julius, Olga asked for a job as a secretary in the camp offices and began searching for clues amongst the Nazis who captured her lover. Finally, with the American liberation only days away, Olga got her hands on Julius’s documentation — only to find he’d been transferred to Buchenwald. Only half-hoping he’d be alive, Olga rushed to the now liberated and nearly desolate camp — and against all odds — found Julius, who was recovering from typhus. A few days later,  the remaining survivors of the camp joined together to help throw them a wedding, and the star-crossed lovers were married.

 6. “Stonewall” Jackson’s last words were for his beloved wife

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Stonewall Jackson, Mary Anne Jackson, and their daughter Julia

Most people know Confederate General Thomas Jackson, AKA the notorious “Stonewall” Jackson, for his often ruthless battle tactics and dauntless leadership. Few, however, know of his passionate love for his wife. A devout Christian, Jackson was incredibly devoted to his marriage to the love of his life, a woman named Mary Anna Morrison. Though he was smitten with her from the beginning, they hit some obstacles when they first began courting — Mary Anna had sworn she would never marry a soldier, Democrat, or a widower, and Jackson was three for three. She soon got over these concerns, however, and the two were married in 1857.
The couple was inseparable, and Jackson was overjoyed when Mary Anna gave birth to their baby daughter, Julia, in 1862. Sadly, he was wounded in friendly fire at the Battle of Chancelorville just a few weeks later, but Mary Anna raced to his location and was with him as he drew his last breath. Before he closed his eyes for the last time, Jackson whispered to his wife, “Let us pass over the river and rest under the shade of the trees.” Mary Anna chose to dress in mourning black for the rest of her life to honor her beloved husband, and never remarried.
Editor’s note: An original version of this post contained wording that made it sound like Horace Greasley was drafted by the Czech Army. Though he was called up after the invasion of Czechoslovakia, he was a Briton called up by the British Army for service. The wording updated to make this more clear.
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The 20 coolest artillery pieces in history

Have you ever run into a spider web at night, and gotten a case of the “screaming mimi’s?” Ever met a sizeable lady, and silently spoken the words “Big Bertha?” Ever fired a bottle rocket at your cousin on the Fourth of July, used a GPS nav system, or shot a gun? Well, you have artillery to thank for all of that. And a lot more.


Big artillery pieces are like great warriors in their own rights. They’ve got names, personalities, biographies, and histories of their own. Gustav and Dora, Thor and Little David, Davey Crockett and Satan himself; they all have seen battle from time to time. It’s kind of odd how much of artillery history has worked its way into pop culture, and how often we refer to the big guns of days gone by.

Here are a few of the biggest, coolest and most important ballistic weapons in history. Vote up the best artillery pieces from history, and be sure to let us know what you think in the comment section.

The Coolest Artillery Pieces in History

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12 best military jobs according to Glassdoor

We scraped through job reviews on Glassdoor.com, a site that lets employees rate their employers and their careers anonymously, to find out what the most loved jobs in the military are. Here are 12 of the highest rated careers in uniform:


12. Air Force Aircraft Mechanic (4.1)

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Staff Sgt. Doug Miller and Master Sgt. Scott Dolese, aircraft structural maintenance technicians, work a jack support box repair from the inside and outside of a C-17 Globemaster III aircraft. (Photo: U.S. Air National Guard Senior Master Sgt. Emily Beightol-Deyerle)

The job is basically summed up in the title. Someone has to be in charge of keeping all of the Air Force’s planes flying, and these are the folks who do it. The Air Force has a number of specific jobs that fall under this umbrella, from Remotely Piloted Aircraft Maintenance to Airlift/Special Mission Aircraft Maintenance or Aircraft Hydraulic Systems. (Average rating is a 4.1.)

11. Coast Guard Storekeeper (4.1)

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Coast Guard Petty Officer 2nd Class Timothy Stratton, a storekeeper with the Eighth Coast Guard District, sifts through hundreds of procurement requests for different departments for the district, Oct. 31, 2011. (Photo: U.S. Coast Guard Petty Officer 3rd Class Casey J. Ranel)

Access to all of the ship or command’s goods while hanging out on ships (mostly) near the coasts. Sounds great. Storekeepers can go further out, serving primarily on icebreakers and cutters when they’re not on the shore. They specialize in inventory and supply. (Average rating is a 4.1.)

10. Marine Corps Aircraft Mechanic (4.1)

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U.S. Marine Corps Sgt. Zachary Jackson, an airframe mechanic with Marine Fighter Attack Squadron (VMFA) 232, conducts maintenance on an F/A-18C Hornet. (Photo: U.S. Marine Corps Lance Cpl. Mason Roy)

Aircraft maintainers in the Marines Corps take care of the fleet of helicopters, fixed wing planes, and tilt-rotor aircraft that carry them and other Marines around the globe. They get a lot of first-hand knowledge of aircraft and are, for the most part, safely tucked away from the worst of the fighting. (Average review is a 4.1.)

9. Air Force Intelligence Analyst (4.2)

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The 35th Operations Support Squadron intelligence analysts and Japan Air Self-Defense Force counterparts plot coordinates on a map in preparation for Red Flag-Alaska 17-2, at Misawa Air Base, Japan, May 26, 2017. (Photo: U.S. Air Force Staff Sgt. Melanie A. Hutto)

Collect all the signals, images, testimony, and other intel that’s coming from the field, and then think about it really hard. Of course, there’s tons of paperwork and your musings on the information determine whether other people live or die, so no pressure or anything. (Average rating is a 4.2.)

8. Coast Guard Information Systems Technician (4.2)

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Chief Petty Officer Mark Bigsby, an information systems technician from Coast Guard Base Seattle, operates a deployable contingency communications system near Ellensburg, Washington. (Photo: U.S. Coast Guard Chief Petty Officer Marshall Wilson)

It’s an IT job, but with the Coast Guard. Keep computers properly hooked up and set up new networks when needed; you could even get called to keep all the computers on an ocean-going cutter working together. And odd note about the Glassdoor for this job though: the IT guys are less likely to recommend the Coast Guard to a friend (62 percent vs. 88 percent) than Coasties as a whole reported. (Average rating is a 4.2.)

7. Coast Guard Operations Specialist (4.2)

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U.S. Coast Guard Rear Adm. Pat DeQuattro, deputy commander, Coast Guard Pacific Area, talks with Coast Guard Petty Officer 1st Class Stephen Perkins, an operations specialist, in Pohang, Republic of Korea, April 12, 2017. (Photo: U.S. Coast Guard Petty Officer 1st Class Rob Simpson)

Another top Coast Guard position, operations specialists are in charge of helping plan operations for ships and then chart courses and allocate resources to make it possible. They can be tasked with everything from taking down smugglers to rescues at sea. (Average review is a 4.2.)

6. Navy Hospital Corpsman (4.2)

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Petty Officer 3rd Class Steven Martinez, left, a corpsman, and Staff Sgt. Joseph Quintanilla, a platoon sergeant, brace as a CH-53E Super Stallion takes off after inserting the company into a landing zone. (Photo: U.S. Marine Corps Sgt. Owen Kimbrel)

A combination of hospital nurses and field medics, Navy corpsmen give medical aid to sailors, Marines, and others both on ship and shore as well as in combat around the world. Obviously, this can result in a lot of stress but can also be very fulfilling. (Average rating is a 4.2.)

5. Army Human Resources Specialist (4.2)

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(Photo: US Army Sgt. Jason Means)

It’s one of the more ridiculed jobs, an “uber-POG” position that rarely sees combat. But human resource specialists seem happy with their desk jobs, tracking personnel and making sure pay goes through properly. (Average rating is a 4.2, vs. an average of 3.4 for the infantry).

4. Army Logistics Manager (4.2)

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Mine-resistant, ambush-protected, all-terrain vehicles line up for a convoy. (Photo: US Army Staff Sgt. Alex Manne)

The Glassdoor ratings for “Army Logistics Manager” cover a variety of jobs, mostly in the transportation branch. They drive trucks, plan routes, and send convoys through enemy territory. So, a little adventure on some days, but humdrum the rest of the time. A sweet life, unless we run into another era like the rise of the IED. Then it sucks. Horribly. (Average rating is a 4.2.)

3. Military officer (4.4)

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Capt. Robert Duchaine, B Company Commander, 1st Squadron, 71st Cavalry Regiment, visits with children Oct. 31 at a Kindergarten school in the Khadamiyah area of western Baghdad. (Photo: U.S. Army 1st Lt. Bob Miller).

“Officer” is a wide catch-all that includes everything from the folks who manage door kickers to those who manage desk jockeys to those who manage truck drivers. (Glassdoor has a separate “Officer” category for each branch, but they all average ratings between 4.3 and 4.5.)

2. Army Operations Manager (4.5)

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Master Sgt. Jeffrey Golden, the operations noncommissioned officer for the Regional Emergency Preparedness Liaison Officer, plans operations on May 7, 2017. (Photo: U.S. Army Reserve Spc. Christopher Hernandez)

This is another ratings category where the reviewers came from different jobs, but these are the folks who worked their way into an operations shop and are now in charge of planning missions and ensuring the teams have everything they need for success, from engineers building new roads to infantrymen slaying bodies. (Average rating is a 4.5.)

1. Coast Guard Machinery Technician (4.8)

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Petty Officer 2nd Class Jeff Bernard, a machinery technician aboard Coast Guard Cutter Healy, cleans the block of one of Healy’s main diesel engines, Sept.18, 2016. (Photo: U.S. Coast Guard Petty Officer 3rd Class Lauren Steenson)

Machinery technicians work on all of the Coast Guards engines, generators, and other pumps, and they service vessels from tiny rafts to cutters and icebreakers. All that working with their hands seems to keep the technicians super happy. (Average rating is a 4.8.)

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