MILITARY CULTURE

5 things we should do in the event of a robot uprising

A war between robots and humans has been the subject of a lot of science fiction, especially in film. And until very recently, the idea that robots could post an autonomous threat to humans was just that: science fiction. Today, advancements in robotics and artificial intelligence have brought us to the point where sentient robots are a very real possibility, which means that a war for humanity's survival is also a possibility. Which gives us a new a problem: How would the military fight something like a Terminator?

Let's be real, humans aren't exactly the best thing for this planet — or for other humans, frankly. So, when we finally build that robot that's stronger, faster, and several times more intelligent than us fleshy humans, it won't take long before the robots realize the planet is better off without us. But that doesn't mean we won't fight like hell to survive!

So, what could we do at the beginning of the uprising to buy us some time, or even possibly save humanity as a whole?


1. Wipe all military data from the internet

The military preaches OPSEC, and when it comes to highly classified, sensitive materials, we succeed. But the documentation for tactics and weaponry is widely available across the internet. An A.I. with the ability to learn things in seconds could easily upload and analyze all that information only to use it against us.

The first chance we get, we'll need to wipe the Internet clean.

It might take a long time, but it could save thousands of lives.

(U.S. Air Force photo by Paul Shirk)

2. Get rid of the internet

Of course, that information-gathering robot would need to connect to the internet to find that juicy data so, let's just get rid of it. We know you'll miss your cat videos and memes, but this is a necessity that'd save us a good amount of time. In addition to military data, the internet can be used to track human movements, norms, tendencies — in short, it'd make it easier to wipe us out.

Of course, we would also have to destroy any physical documentation that contains the same information to keep that out of the hands of our robot overlords as well.

Brig. Gen. John P. Horner powers down the server supporting the Air Force Recruiting Information Support System – Legacy application at Headquarters Air Force Recruiting Service.

(U.S. Air Force photo by Johnny Saldivar)

3. Switch to larger caliber weapons

We did all we could to try and prevent robots from gathering the information needed to replicate, but we failed. Now, robots are creating other, better, newer robots at an alarming pace. Now, the next step is to switch to larger caliber weapons. Chances are, the robots are going to build each other out of the strongest materials available to withstand the firearms we currently have — it's time to up the ante.

Larger caliber weapons may not be the best solution but it won't hurt to have that extra punch behind each bullet.

(U.S. Navy photo)

4. Switch to incendiary rounds

In addition to larger calibers, we should also use bullets that could set our enemies on fire. Remember: we're fighting sentient robots for the survival of the human race, so let's give them everything we've got.

Airman 1st Class Anthony Meyerhoffer inspects and counts 20 mm high-explosive incendiary rounds.

(U.S. Air Force photo by Tech. Sgt. Demetrius Lester)

5. Stock up on explosive weapons

High explosives win the day. We should be using every explosive we have available to rip the machines apart. Even if it doesn't destroy them completely, it'll be a hell of a lot easier to kill a robot with no arms and legs than it would be to frag one that can still rip you in half.

These things will definitely be more useful than they are right now.

(U.S. Marine Corps photo by Gunnery Sgt. Mark Oliva)