James Bond has long been the most famous intelligence operative on the silver screen. Movie buffs and casual fans alike know James Bond, and it’s rare to meet someone who hasn’t seen at least one of the films. But like most spy films, there are many issues with the characters and storylines.
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Take, for instance, the fact that they call him a “secret agent” when he is in fact an intelligence officer. On top of that, he doesn’t have a line manager; instead, he reports directly to the head of MI-6. Then there is the reality that a “license to kill” doesn’t really exist.
Despite these minor details, the films are actually quite good. However, there are many reasons James Bond is truly the worst spy ever, even if he is a fictional character. Here are the top 007 reasons:
001. He carries a gun on airplanes.
He walks on and off commercial flights while wearing a shoulder holster and is never once stopped by security. He strolls through the airport fully armed, and no one seems to notice or be bothered by the fact that an armed man in a suit is boarding a flight.
Even if he has it in his bag instead, it is still never questioned. In reality, he probably would have received a weapon when he arrived at his destination. He wouldn’t have carried it on an airplane with him.
002. He constantly destroys or loses his equipment.
Bond is regularly issued equipment, weapons, and vehicles that are worth millions. However, he never returns any of it, at least not in the same condition he got it. You would think that when given the highest levels of technological advancement in “spy gear,” weapons, and cars, one would be inclined to take extra special care of it all.
003. He is always being captured and/or beaten up.
Despite the fact that he is a highly trained intelligence officer, one who is supposed to be aware of his surroundings at all times, and that the number one rule of intelligence is “never get caught,” Mr. Bond is constantly being captured. Either by the baddies he chases or by some randos.
Even if he isn’t being captured, he is getting beaten up by any number of people associated with whichever villain he is chasing. Where is all that training he meant to have?
004. He never follows orders.
The intelligence world does leave some wiggle room to think on your feet, but a big part of this world is also following the orders you are given. James Bond never does that. It doesn’t matter what anyone says or tells him to do; he does the opposite. He always feels that he is in the right, and he does his own thing at all times, no matter the consequences.
005. He travels under his own name.
Anyone who knows anything about intelligence knows that they absolutely never travel using their own identity whilst on operations. That is part of the whole point of what they do. However, James Bond, who is supposed to be one of the best, always travels under his own name and with his own documents.
006. He always draws attention to himself.
One of the biggest parts of intelligence training is how to never get noticed. For someone who is supposed to be a spy or secret agent or intelligence officer, depending on what you like, James Bond draws an awful lot of attention to himself.
He drives expensive cars, wears ridiculously expensive suits, and stays at five-star hotels. Not to mention the fact that he is always blowing things up and firing his weapon in highly public places.
007. Everyone knows who he is.
The number one reason James Bond is the worst spy ever: Everyone knows exactly who he is. Every bad guy, every hotel receptionist, every bartender knows his name. He walks into a bar and is greeted with, “Good evening, Mr. Bond,” like he’s Norm walking into Cheers.
Plus, they know exactly what he drinks! Villains know his reputation and that he has a license to kill. They all know him on sight. To top it off, they all know his 00 code number… his secret code number. The number of times an adversary uses 007 is absolutely astounding. This alone is enough to make James Bond the worst spy ever.
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