The 10 best things about being the daughter of a Marine

If you’re like me, your answer to the inevitable question, “So, where are you from?”  has to be answered in list form. Of course, the next question is always, “Oh, so you’re an Army brat?”

To which I answer, “Marine brat, actually.”

While this question used to fill me with dread, as I’ve gotten older I have come to embrace my time as a Marine brat. So, as a celebration of my childhood, I present to you the top 10 best things about being the daughter of a Marine.

1. Government officials are nicer to you

When I was in college, I went on a ski trip to Canada and forgot to bring my passport. When we tried to cross back into the U.S., the border agent gave me the side eye and started lecturing me about increased security.

Then we had this conversation:
Border Agent: Where were you born?
Me: Camp Pendleton, California.

Border Agent: (visibly becomes friendlier) Oh! Do you have a parent in the Marines?
Me: Yep! My dad’s a Marine.

Border Agent: Ah, that’s great. Well, just don’t forget your passport next time.

Boom. Thanks dad for keeping me from getting trapped in Canada forever.

Troy_and_abed_handshake

Dramatization of me and the border agent.

2. You have a sword in your house

Sure lots of people have baseball bats or knives or guns in their houses, but not many have a sword. In high school, my dad’s dress blues sword hung on the wall in the den where it could strike fear into the hearts of boys while lending our house a sense of medieval charm.

Don’t worry, all my boyfriends were much more well-behaved than Joffrey.

Don’t worry, all my boyfriends were much more well-behaved than Joffrey.

3. Your dad scares your boyfriends

Which leads me to number 3. Now, I pride myself as being an independent, strong woman who doesn’t buy into that puritanical, patriarchal protection nonsense.

That being said, I can’t say it isn’t fun when my dad puts guys just the tiniest bit on edge. My high school boyfriend once told me that my dad was funny, friendly, and just a little bit terrifying. Heck, my best friend from college is still nervous around him.

2dfe4a156ea009abe299bad9442867ce

(Paramount Pictures)

4. You’ve seen “Full Metal Jacket” 627 times

Not the whole movie, just the first 20 minutes or so while your dad tells you about how realistic it is, how hard boot camp was, and how he broke his all of his leg bones during the first 5 minutes of boot camp but still made it to the end, damnit***

*I don’t know if this qualifies as a “best” thing or just “a” thing.

**He has clarified that he only had a stress fracture in his foot and it was the last week of boot camp. But still.

Real life marines, basically.

Real life Marines, basically.

5. You are always on time

To be early is to be on time, to be on time is to be late, and to be late is out of the question.  

Military time isn’t just converting 1500 hours to 3:00 PM. It also means knowing you should really be there at 2:45.

Also, folks like this drive you mad.

Also, folks like this drive you mad.

6. You get really good at meeting people

Awkward small talk and continuously having the answer the same questions over and over again? Bring it on!

I’ve met at least 76 new people every year since I was born. Ok, I don’t actually have an exact figure, but from the time I was a wee one, I’ve been comfortable with being suddenly dropped into a completely unfamiliar group of people.  When my friends fretted about going away to a college where they wouldn’t know anyone, I was happily filling out applications for colleges all over the country.

Moving has also made me great at 1) joining clubs 2) first dates 3) teaching college students.

Me, on the second day of school in a new place.

Me, on the second day of school in a new place.

7 . You don’t get overly attached to houses or places

In my family, we got into the habit of making “pros” lists when we moved somewhere new so we didn’t just focus on what we missed about the old place. This habit has forced me to look at the bright side of any location in which I find myself. I’m also great at packing and unpacking, and I won’t ever have to go through the existential crisis of my parents selling my childhood home, because I don’t have one!

The downside of not having a childhood home to return to is that I get overly attached to my stuff. “How can you expect me to throw away any of the birthday cards I’ve ever received. THIS IS ALL I HAVE”

2bg.hoardfall.

It’s everything.

8. But you get to live in awesome places

By the time I was 5, I’d already lived in Southern California, Japan, and Maryland.

Maybe you wouldn’t call Maryland awesome (but, crabcakes!), but every new place changes you for the better and becomes a part of you.

My family left Japan with a love of sushi, an amazing chopstick holder collection, and a life-long family friendship.  My parents kept in such good touch with a Japanese family we met while we lived overseas that their son came to live with us when he was in high school, and this summer my parents are going to his wedding in Turkey.

As an added bonus, you eventually know people in so many cities, that you can go on vacation virtually anywhere in the United States without having to pay for a hotel.

9. You become very close to your family

Throughout my life, I’ve had several friends refer to my family as “The Waltons.” When my mom was 25, she was living on a military base in Japan with a toddler, a baby, and a husband who was gone for months at a time. We quickly came to rely on each other for support and companionship.

snuggie-celebration-gif_zps52f94245

This tight-knit feeling has lasted well into my adulthood.

10. And even though you have to loan him to the Corps for long stretches of time, you know that your dad is, first and foremost, there for you

giphy-4

Pow.

Semper Fidelis! 

tumblr_nyc23s7ml51t382eqo1_500

TOP ARTICLES
Why the 'Butcher of Bosnia' faces a life sentence for war crimes

Ratko Mladic, a former Serbian general, will receive a verdict from the International Criminal Tribunal for war crimes he committed, to include genocide.

Russia swears a cloud of radioactive pollution is not a nuclear accident

A radioactive cloud is moving over parts of Europe, seemingly coming from Russia, reminiscent of the Chernobyl nuclear-power-plant disaster in 1986.

Taliban drug labs targeted by B-52 strikes overnight

American aircraft have targeted drug producing facilities in Afghanistan for the first time under a new strategy aimed at cutting off Taliban funding.

Why South Korea is building a unique missile interceptor

A missile system that could be used to target North Korea Scuds will cost Seoul more than $800 million to develop, a Seoul defense committee said.

SEALs honor the man who made the ‘frogmen’ possible

Last week, at the Omni Shoreham Hotel, a crowd gathered to commemorate the fateful event that gave rise to what would become the US Navy SEALs.

The 50 most violent cities in the world

Of the fifty cities on the list, forty-three are in Latin America, including nineteen in Brazil, eight in Mexico, and seven in Venezuela.

How the true story of Thanksgiving ended in a war

Just a generation after the famed Thanksgiving feast shared between pilgrims and Native Americans, the two groups were engaged in bloody battles.

The wounded North Korean defector is infected by an unknown parasite

The North Korean defector shot by his fellow soldiers has been found to be riddled with parasites his South Korean doctors have never seen.

North Korea's emerging free market threatens to topple the regime

Kim Jong Un's regime of dictatorship continues to be threatened as North Korea advances into the free market. Capitalism could be hero here.

This is the light attack aircraft the Saudis might buy

The Textron Scorpion's production-ready version will be at the Dubai Air Show, and the plane could end up being purchased by the Royal Saudi Air Force.