8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon - We Are The Mighty
Humor

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

Marines carry a lot of gear while on a combat deployment: body armor, weapons, and communication equipment — just to name a few.


With all that weight tallying up quickly and a lack of storage space to contain it all, Marines have to be picky about what they’re willing to haul around on those long missions.

At times, they’ll even negotiate with one another who carries what, but check out this list of what Marines have no problem taking with them regardless of how much it weights.

1. Energy drinks

Although water is the healthier choice — there’s nothing like a delicious energy drink to make that 12-hour mission seem more enjoyable and speed up time.

 

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
Perfect on a dry day (Source: Flickr)

 

2. Extra ammo

“I have too many bullets to shoot, Sergeant,” said no Marine ever.

Ammo is heavy, but the look on a grunt’s face when he’s unloading a full magazine at the ISIS: priceless.

Extra ammo, one thing Marines always carry
Isn’t it beautiful?

3. Smokes/Dip

Even if you didn’t indulge in tobacco products stateside, you’re probably going to light up a cigarette or pack your lip full of dip while on an extended patrol.

4. Things that make other things go boom

The weight of a few Claymores, grenades, and mortars can add up if you’re carrying a few extras in your mole pouches, but one thing Marines love and are proud of is their outstanding ability to blow sh*t up.

To that, we tip our hats.

5. Crystal lite packets

Because drinking water can get boring — really boring. Although it’s a healthier option than number #1.

6. Pogey bait

Many have never heard of this term.

Pogey bait is an assortment of cakes, candies, and nonmilitary foods.

7. Digital camera

Because recording those special little moments of bombing the hell out of ISIS are unique ones.

8. Baby wipes

You never know when you have to take a G.I. shower…or a field dump.

Bonus: G.P.S.

Just in case your 2nd Lieutenant can’t get you to the second checkpoint.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(Source: Garmin)

Can you think of any others? Comment below.

Articles

These 12 awesome photos were ruined by blank firing adapters

Military folks get some of the best chances at awesome profile pics. They wear camouflage without looking ridiculous, spend a lot of time with firearms, and are generally physically fit.


Unfortunately, these awesome photos are often ruined by one little detail: blank firing adapters that turn weapons into big noise-makers. Sure, they make training much safer and cheaper, but is that really worth it when BFAs ruined these 12 photos?

1. A Marine pulls guard with his super-scary, blank-firing weapon as two Georgian soldiers giggle at him.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(Photo: U.S. Army Spc. Nathaniel Nichols)

2. A U.S. Army Ranger student, assigned to the Airborne and Ranger Training Brigade, realizes that his weapon couldn’t even kill a squirrel with this stupid BFA on it, July 8, 2016

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(U.S. Army photo by Sgt. Austin Berner)

3. “Do I look like Rambo?” “No.”

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(Photo: U.S. Army Spc. Garrett Johnson)

4. A soldier provides no security while on patrol because his weapon has been neutered with a BFA at Exercise Saber Guardian 16.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(Photo: U.S. Army Staff Sgt. Anita VanderMolen)

5. Paratroopers blow open a door with real explosives and then attack their enemy with loud noises at the National Training Center in Fort Irwin, California.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(GIF: Fort Irwin Public Affairs Jason Miller)

6. Spc. Timothy Squires, an infantryman, scans his sector of fire and prepares to make “Pew, pew!” noises during a squad-level situational training exercise held in Kosovo, July 25, 2016. “Pew, pew!” noises are exactly as lethal as weapons with BFAs.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(Photo: U.S. Army Staff Sgt. Thomas Duval)

7. Marine Corps infantry squad leaders try to look cool while rocking BFAs. They come close but just can’t get past the stigma of the unusable weapon.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(Photo: U.S. Marine Corps Cpl. Aaron S. Patterson)

8. A U.S. Army Ranger student searches a simulated enemy prisoner of war. If the POW learns that the Ranger student’s weapon can only fire sound waves, he’ll likely resist and escape.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(Photo: U.S. Army Sgt. Austin Berner)

9. An Army squad leader shows his men how to get a decent Facebook profile photo with a BFA. The BFA turns an otherwise lethal weapon into a prop.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(Photo: U.S. Army Staff Sgt. Thomas Duval)

10. A cadet lays down imaginary cover fire for his teammate during a grenade course. The teammate’s grenades could actually kill someone but this simulated cover fire is useless.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(Photo: U.S. Army Sgt. 1st Class Brian Hamilton)

11. A U.S. airman, right, actually manages to look cooler than a soldier simply by having a functioning weapon. The airman also has a pretty sweet helmet.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(Photo: Fort Bliss Ismael Ortega)

12. A U.S. Army soldier rocks sunglasses, a machine gun, and a belt of ammo but still looks funny thanks to mismatched camo, laser tag gear, and a blank firing adapter.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(Photo: U.S. Army Reserve Sgt. Quentin Johnson)

Articles

13 funniest military memes for the week of June 16

Military memes are like digital morale, and we have collected the most potent 13 from this week for your pleasure.


1. Definitely going to get made fun of on the ship for that one (via Sh-t my LPO says).

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
Gonna be especially tough when you get sent to different ships.

2. The Army does not know how to party (via ASMDSS).

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
Soldiers do, but not the Army.

ALSO SEE: The US Navy might pull these old combat ships out of mothballs

3. In the end, only the DD-214 remains.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
At least you get to cover your truck in Eagles, Globes, and Anchors.

4. This is why socialized pay in the military is so weird:

(via Coast Guard Memes)

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
Remember, future enlistees, E3 pay is E3 pay is E3 pay.

5. All this for a Camaro (via Team Non-Rec).

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
A Camaro you can’t even drive when you’re stuck out at sea.

6. Double points when they want to talk about morale (via Why I’m Not Re-enlisting).

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

7. “Keep on firing, buddy. I’m behind cover and my guardian angel is 3… 2… 1…” (via Weapons of Meme Destruction)

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
BOOM!

8. Peace. Out. (Via Lost in the Sauce)

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
Find someone else to fight your war. I’m headed to college and stuff.

9. Turns out, the camouflage works better than anyone predicted (via Sh-t my LPO says).

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
This guy won the dirtbag, shammer, and hide and seek championships for this year. Triple crown!

10. All about the Benjamins, baby (via The Salty Soldier).

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
The answer is no. Thanks for the money.

11. Chiefs will avoid it at all costs (via Decelerate Your Life).

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
They’ll go so far as swim PT just to avoid it.

12. Just remember to bring something to use in exchange (via Decelerate Your Life).

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
The supply bubbas know how to get what’s theirs.

13. He can’t help you now, staff sergeant (via Why I’m Not Re-enlisting).

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
College and the civilian job market don’t look so scary right before another NTC rotation.

popular

8 times ‘Jarhead 2’ made you grit your teeth

Hollywood loves to make sequels even from semi-successful films. Maybe that’s the reason why “Jarhead 2” was made or just because the world needs more movies about Jarheads — but who knows.


Released in 2014, the film follows a squad of supply Marines who get attacked by enemy forces and must fight their way to safety. Some other stuff happens along the way and spoiler alert — most of them eventually make it back safely.

There, we just saved you two hours.

This film is one of many that makes Marines grit their teeth and have to look away — that’s difficult to pull off.

So check out our list of moments that made us grit our teeth.

1. Priority during a firefight

In the opening scene of the film, the Marines at Patrol Base Cobra are under heavy attack from enemy forces. But this Marine is ordered to finish unloading supplies from a truck rather than firing his weapon to defend the area.

 

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

We guess hydrating is more important than laying down a base of fire. (Source: Universal/ Screenshot)

2. Jarhead shows biggest bullseye ever

Corpsmen and medics haven’t carried medical bags with the Red Cross stamped on it in decades — just saying. That’s a huge a** red cross to add insult to injury.

 

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
We wouldn’t want to stand next to this fictional Corpsman anywhere in country carrying that. (Source: Universal/ Screenshot)

3. Camp Leatherwhat?

They could have done a better job rendering what Camp Leatherneck looked like a few years ago. That’s why we have Google images.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

Not even close. (Source: Universal/ Screenshot)

The tent city of the real Camp Leatherneck. Much different, right?

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
The Marine Corps’ base camp in Afghanistan. (Source: Pinterest)

4. Sleeves up and wearing the wrong undershirt

A senior officer would know better than to put on the wrong color undershirt, wear gunny sleeves and sport a cover that looks like a blooming onion. Plus he’s wearing a guard duty belt for some reason.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

You could afford a talented actor like Stephen Lang, but researching Marine Corps uniforms wasn’t in the budget? (Source: Universal/ Screenshot)

5. At the rifle range without any protective gear

The Range Safety Officer would lose his qualification in a heartbeat if a superior saw this crap.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

Safety isn’t a real issue. (Source: Universal/ Screenshot)

6. Jarhead 2 could have at least got collar device placement right

Oh, come on! Really?

 

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

Countless numbers of teeth have just broken after spotting this captain’s rank insignia placement. (Source: Universal/ Screenshot)

7. Worst secured perimeter ever

If you wanted to attack these fictional Marines, you could just walk right up from behind and they would never f*cking notice.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

WTF? (Source: Universal/ Screenshot)

8. Jarhead 2 features a scope mounted on the carrying handle

Nope. This film takes place in 2013, meaning RCOs were used and mounted in lieu of a carrying handle. No offense, but supply Marines do not rate those types of scopes.

 

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

For the love of God, do some research people. (Source: Universal/ Screenshot)

Humor

5 tips to have the best Marine Corps birthday ever

Hey, Marines!


It’s that time of year again to take your dress blues to the dry cleaners and get them ready for the Marine Corps ball. Considered the biggest night of the year, the ball is a rare opportunity to get dressed up and get completely sh*t faced with your chain of command.

It’s your time to celebrate because not many people get two legit b-days in one year.

Related: 39 awesome photos of life in the US Marine Corps infantry

But before you mount your medals, ask your date, or book your hotel room, check out our list of ways you can make this birthday the best one ever.

1. Get the hottest date you can muster

Marines are notorious for asking a celebrity to attend the Marine Corps Ball with them. Since it’s considered the biggest event in the Corps, don’t hesitate to jump on social media and ask your celebrity crush to go with you.

Here’s TMR to tell you a few steps how:


2. Challenge a superior to a dance-off

It’s not very often when a lower enlisted Marine can duke-it-out with a superior and get away with it. Think about working on your dance moves now — it’s an epic opportunity for bragging rights.

But if you sergeant major moves like this Marine, you’re probably f*cked!

Get some, Sergeant Major! (Image via Giphy)

3. Split an expensive hotel bill

Many devil dogs celebrate the Marine Corps birthday more than their own birthday. It can get pretty crazy. Since many units celebrate far away from the base, consider getting a few of your buddies to split the cost of a large hotel suite for an epic after party and dance well into the night.

Just remember to invite some girls. (Image via Giphy)

4. Study the “chest candy”

Before you pull on your dress blues, take a few extra minutes to study the Marine Corps’ ribbons and medals. It’s an interesting way of getting some background info on your superiors without asking them.

You can also feel smug if you have more combat decorations than they do…

Also Read: This is how ‘Ripley at the Bridge’ became a Marine Corps legend

5. Take photos/videos — drinking is temporary but random party pics are forever

You are most likely going to get wasted drunk either at the ball or in the hotel (not recommended — aim for that perfect buzz). Take tons of photos and video because chances are you’re not going to remember much the next day.

Having those epic memories of taking a celeb as your date, beating the sergeant major in a dance contest, and making fun of a POG staff sergeant behind their back will be well documented.

I don’t remember doing that. (Image via Giphy)WATM wishes every Marine a happy and safe birthday. SEMPER FI, MARINES!

Articles

5 reasons why your contract marriage wasn’t the worst thing ever

“I, Private Schmuckatelli, take you, whatever your name is, to be my lawfully wedded wife.”


Many service members (not mentioning any names) spoke these words right before a deployment to move out of the small studio-sized barracks most likely for the extra money every month.

This money comes from the Basic Allowance for Housing (BAH). Implemented in January 1998 BAH pays housing expenses for service members to move off-base if the barracks are overcrowded or if a change in the member’s lifestyle warrants it (i.e., having a baby or getting married. After a certain pay grade, everyone receives BAH, but it is restricted in the lower ranks. That’s why some take the risk of a contract marriage.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
Who here married a stripper to move out of the barracks? (images via Giphy)

Although contract marriages are frowned upon by the chain of command, it’s a well-known practice utilized by all ranks today. Capitalizing on this financial loophole could benefit your future (depending on the person with whom you join in court-approved matrimony).

Here are a few added bonuses to your contract marriage that you may have never noticed before.

1. Renter’s History  

Signing a lease with a rental company starts your “Renter’s History.” As long as you pay your rent on time, this keeps you in good standing with the rental bureaus. Young service members may not have the best credit, but having good rental history is a step in the right direction.

Your contract marriage could help prevent you from being homeless in the future.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
“I am serious and don’t call me, Shirley.”  (Paramount Pictures)

2. Learn to Budget

Although the medical benefits are valuable, they could throw a curveball and require more money every month than you planned. Checking to see how much a service member earns is simple: you can Google it. Waiting to get paid on the 1st and 15th of every month could feel like a freaking eternity without a budget.

A contract marriage probably didn’t make you a millionaire even if it made you feel that way after that first check. So learn to…

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(Paramount/Dream Works,)

3. It Follows

Unfortunately, one crappy aspect of being in the military is how your command intervenes in your personal life. They like to know about everything and if you don’t tell them upfront, somehow they manage to find out.

If you plan on making the military a career, I advise against a contract marriage, especially when word gets out about your legally-binding “spouse” while you’re out hitting on every single person at the bar. Remember: it’s technically fraud, so good luck getting promoted.

People can often suck.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

4. Emotional Maturity

The average marrying age range in the civilian world is 25 to 27. However, in the military, the median falls at 22 – above legal drinking age, but not yet a mature adult. No one is condoning getting married for the benefits, but if you do and it doesn’t work out, you shouldn’t be surprised.

You were young, dumb and full of one bad idea after another. Your temporary spouse may not have been the perfect soulmate, but at least you narrowed it down.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

5. The Silver Lining

Looking back on it, would you do it again? Overall experiences will vary depending on if everything went to plan. The memories you have are what separates you as an individual and makes you unique. If it made you into a grumpy old man, then that sucks.

Take it for what it is. It’s always better to look toward the future than dwell in the past.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
“Beautifully put.” (New Line)                                                                                            

Humor

The 13 funniest memes for the week of June 15th

Looks like troops will stop doing drills in South Korea and actually be pulled out of there. Great. Now every unit is going to get some Joe who was just stationed there that’ll constantly complain about how “South Korea was so much better” than their new unit — despite constantly talking sh*t while there.

It’s always the same lower-enlisted troop. You know the type. They’ll show up just barely in time for First Sergeant to call “fall in,” they’ll be hungover and smell like cigarettes at every formation, and it’s almost a guarantee that they’ll defend their sh*tty actions with a limp, “well, in my last unit…”

Have fun with that, NCOs. No one will blame you for tree-line counseling those fools.


8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

(Meme via Amuse)

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

(Meme via Disgruntled Vets)

Mindless detail where you can joke with your buddies or being stuck in a training meeting, listening to how the good idea fairy will reshape the unit?

Tough call.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

NCOs’ eyes are like the dinosaurs’. They can’t see you unless you move.

I learned it from Jurassic Park, so it has to be true.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

(Meme via Valhalla Wear)

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

(Meme via ASMDDS)

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

(Meme via Gunner Boy)

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

(Meme via Military Memes)

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

(Meme via Army as F*ck)

There’s a massive difference between being a “five-jump chump” and having your mustard stain.

Which basically cuts out every staff officer who wanted to impress the commander.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

(Meme via the Salty Soldier)

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

(Meme via Pop Smoke)

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

(Meme via Pop Smoke)

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
Articles

9 things you should know before becoming a Marine infantry officer

We’ve all seen Marine officer recruiting videos either on TV, on our mobile devices, or posted on a billboard next to the highway. For many, the video’s imagery, music, and testimonials cause young minds to consider joining the Corps — for one reason or another.


The video states what you’re going to learn and what awesome prospects lay ahead. Those who attend and complete the training can move on and serve in the Marine Infantry if that’s the path the individual has set for himself.

But what the training book doesn’t teach you is the role outside of the technical. Life in the Marines as an officer is a proud one, but it’s also stressful.

We sat down with our resident Marine infantry officer Chase Millsap and discussed what you should know before taking on the vital leadership role.

1. Your primary weapon is the field radio

It’s your job as a leader to organize your Marines while taking contact. Knowing how to use your radio to instruct your Marines and coordinate supporting arms is paramount.

Not that type of radio Jean-Claude. (Image via Giphy)

2. You will always eat last

In the Marines, enlisted Leathernecks get to eat their chow before anyone else, which means officers are always at the end of the line.

It’s tradition. (Images via Giphy)

3. You will almost always be the least experienced person starting day one

Everyone has to start out somewhere (unless you’re prior enlisted). Listen and learn as quickly as you can.

No doubt you’ll be motivated the first day though. (Images via Giphy)

4. Physical fitness isn’t optional

The minimum PT score is 300 — just saying. And you’d better never, ever let that squad leader beat you on a unit run.

None of those count, sir. (Images via Giphy)

5. Pony up the big bucks to take care of your grunts

We’re not suggesting you buy everyone in your platoon houses — that’s crazy talk. We mean forking out cash for cigarettes, rip its and dip. It will boost your unit’s morale.

Goodbye hard earned cash. (Images via Giphy)

6. You don’t have to be nice.

But you do need to be fair.

That’s hilarious but it’s so mean. (Images via Giphy)

7. You better know why you’re giving those orders

Having the power to give a Marine an order is a big deal. So you need to be sure that it’s well thought out ahead of time.

Sounds serious. (Images via Giphy)

8. Read these three books

Attacks” by Erwin Rommel, “Fields of fire” by Jim Webb, and “One Bullet Away” by Nate Fick. That is all.

Highlight everything. (Images via Giphy)

9. Most importantly: it’s not about you

It’s about taking care of your Marines.

That look you give when you’re told something you don’t want to hear. (Images via Giphy)

Humor

7 epic ‘gearing up’ montages from action movies you love

When an action film needs to let the audience know what gear the good or bad guys have in the arsenal, they turn to the epic cinematic tool that is the “gearing up” montage.


Also known as a “lock and load” montage, the idea is to get the audience pumped up in the seats for the action sequences that are coming their way.

Related: 7 awesome weapon arsenals in the movies

So check out our list of awesome gearing up montages, and be sure to let us know which ones we left off.

1. Commando

When on a mission to recuse his kidnapped teenage daughter from the bad guys, nothing said ’80s action movie like this epic gearing up montage with Ahhnold.

That camouflage paint will allow you to blend into any environment … in the broad day light.

2. The Batman movies

Producers love showing the caped crusader gear up against DC’s most villainous characters — even adding in a few butt and crotch shots.

“I’m Batman, and this is my crotch.” (Kevin Stock, YouTube)

3. Hot Fuzz


Icarus Prime, YouTube

After a motivated cop relocates to a dull town where a murder hasn’t been committed in over 20-years, he’s bound to uncover something. But when he stumbles upon the town’s dark secret, he uses some big guns from the fully stocked arsenal to save the day.

4. Raw Deal

Of course Arnold made this list twice.

Mattias Eriksson, YouTube

5. Loaded Weapon 1

If you haven’t seen this hilarious early ’90s spoof, you’re totally missing out.

He put on a pearl necklace. That’s classic. 

Also Read: 9 things that would be different if Chuck Norris led the Bin Laden raid

6. Rambo: First Blood Part II

Tying the laces of your boots never looked so tough.

7. Hot Shots: Part Deux

The ultimate Rambo spoof.

Can you think of any others? Comment below.

Articles

7 things Jodie will do with your girlfriend this Valentine’s Day

Ah, Valentine’s Day! Love is in the air! Cupid is on the march!


And you have duty. Or are deployed. Or stuck in the barracks. … Whatever.

We all know what that means. While you’re busy mopping floors and standing at parade rest, Joe D./Jodie/Jody is on the prowl, looking for heartsick girlfriends and boyfriends stuck all alone at home. Here’s the date he’s probably suggesting to your significant other right now:

1. He’ll probably give her some nice flowers.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
RIP Mary Tyler Moore. You were the real MVP. (GIF: Giphy/hulu.com)

Most likely roses, but it could be something creative like daisies or tulips.

2. Take a ride in your Cadillac.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

The wax still looks pretty good, and the shine on the tires hasn’t lost any of the luster. Sorry, man. “Ain’t no use in looking back, Jodie’s got your Cadillac.”

3. Dinner …

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(GIF: giphy.com/amzn.to)

Soft light from candles glints off of some fancy silverware as it cuts through delicious Italian food. Filling, but not too heavy.

 4. … and a movie.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(GIF: giphy.com/foxsearchlightpictures.tumblr.com)

They’re gonna finish up just in time to catch a movie at the theater. Something funny, and not too racey for a girlfriend hanging out with a guy just as friends. It’s not “50 Shades Darker.” It’s “The Lego Batman Movie.”

5. Take a long walk in the park, on the beach, through the woods, or out behind the barn where no one can see them.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(GIF: youtube.com/ICON)

It was an early movie, so the night is still pretty young. And the clear stars make a walk this time of evening just perfect. Of course, she might have to borrow his jacket, to keep the February chill at bay.

6. Play some nice, soft music.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(GIF: youtube.com/Topshelf Records)

What? Lots of guys keep smooth jazz on their phone. And Jodie just likes to hear this kind of music.

In the dark. In a secluded area. On a walk. With a service member’s significant other.

7. Let’s be honest, Jodie/Jody/Joe D. isn’t doing anything with anyone. But your girlfriend/guyfriend/general’s daughter-friend could use a good Valentine’s Day.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
(GIF: giphy.com/Limelightlowlifes)

Your significant other is probably sitting at home, still in love with you. But don’t take that for granted. It’s Valentine’s Day for crying out loud.

If you’re stateside and can surprise them, just do everything from this list that Jodie might have done. If you’re deployed, send some nice flowers and a sweet video message.

Both of these things work even if you have to do it on the 13th or 15th.

Come on, give your loved ones some credit. The ladies know better than to give into Jodie’s nonsense. Now, the boys and Jane, on the other hand….

Humor

6 crazy things MPs have found during vehicle inspections

Anyone who drives up to a military base’s front gates trying to gain access can expect some kind of inspection. The process can be as simple as getting your ID checked, but other times you’ll be instructed to drive into the vehicle examination lane, where MPs, or military police, bust out the undercarriage mirror and drug-sniffing dogs.


Most people don’t care because they have nothing to hide, but on some occasions, MPs make some interesting discoveries.

Related: 9 examples of the military’s dark humor

We asked a few our of MP friends about the craziest things they’ve found during their vehicle inspections. Here’s what they said:

6. Male-enhancement pumps

We’re told this is the most embarrassing one to be caught with… Strangely, nobody ever claims ownership.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

5. Steroids

Yup. Those are illegal no matter how much they improve your bench press. Unsurprisingly, this product is commonly found among servicemembers who carry the infantry MOS.

4. Marijuana

Even if the plant is legal in your state, it’s still illegal on military bases. The amounts vary from a few grams to several ounces. Often, the substance is hidden in shoe boxes and gas tanks.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
This smuggler decided to hide their stash in a shoe box. (Photo from Wikipedia Commons)

3. Inflated blow-up dolls

Nope! You’re not getting a visual, but you can use your brilliant imagination… failing that, there’s always Google.

2. Ninja weapons

You never know when you need to fight evil forces.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

Also Read: 6 crazy things actually found in boot camp amnesty boxes

1. Urine bottles

Some servicemembers have to work as duty drivers, and they log several hours in government vehicles. They, too, are subject to inspections. If the servicemember is under time constraints and making a pit stop isn’t on the schedule, an empty bottle of Gatorade works just as well.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
Maybe it’s Gatorade?

Humor

These are the 43 best COVID-19 memes for the week of March 27

We published our favorite 63 COVID-19 memes not too long ago and the response was overwhelming. Turns out during these serious, scary and uncertain times, one thing is for sure: We could all use a good laugh. And one more thing that’s for sure: the memes just keep on coming. We bring you this week’s best COVID-19 sayings and memes.


8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

1. This is why we can’t have nice things

It’s bad enough we cancelled March Madness. Can ya’ll just please follow the directions so we can have some summer?

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

2. And you thought finding love in the time of cholera was bad

At least it’s not you, it’s COVID-19.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

3. 6 feet, damn it!

I always thought Pooh was the selfish one, breaking into everyone’s houses and stealing all the honey. Maybe it’s clingy Piglet.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

4. That homeschool life tho

If you can teach fractions pouring wine, you can teach gym with chores.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

5. I volunteer as tribute

You know you’re going to get voluntold anyway.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

6. Spoiler alert: nowhere

I got so excited when I saw Absolutely.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

7. Wasn’t me

It’s always the wife.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

8. Dad joke

Oh, so punny. Sorry, not sorry.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

9. The truth hurts

If only hoarding had an immunity boost with it.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

10. I’d like to pass over 2020

Seems logical.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

11. Puerto Backyard-O

Just be careful of the DUI checkpoint in the hall.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

12. So full of hope

So full of $hit. 1

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

13. This little piggy

That’s the one who stayed home, Karen.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

14. You put the lotion on the skin

But honestly, isn’t there a tinnyyyyy part of you that thinks it would be so nice to be touched by another human again?

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

15. The quarantine cut 

This cut will help you social distance like never before!

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

16. It ends with credits

After Tiger King, is there really anything left to watch?

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

17. Poetry in action 

We might need this on a t-shirt.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

18. Allergies be like 

No, but seriously. You know you can’t sneeze without everyone panicking.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

19. Blend and repeat

We call this breakfast.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

20. No pants either way

Just don’t confuse the two.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

21. Life lessons

Here Timmy, blow your nose. And breathe in.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

22. Bad Boy vs. Death Row

These are important life lessons.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

23. Stay-at-home order 

Except for everyone in the military.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

24. Quarantine body

We might need to issue a lockdown on our snack cabinet…

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

25. Nobody wants bed bugs

Lice, too.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

26. Show me the money!

Plumbing is an essential service. Hoarding is not.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

27. Is today the day? 

And to think you might not even know for 5-14 days…

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

28. Another COVID-cut

You can always just shave it off…

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

29. Prince Charmin

The year of the hunter.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

30. Hashtag no filter

No truer words were ever spoken.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

31. Speaking of Matthew McConaughey…

At least he got thinner?

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

32. Look at this stuff, isn’t it neat

We know we’re mixing Disney movies, but that bidet is a whole new world.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

33. Meanwhile, in Oklahoma

We know Carol Beskin is the real cause behind coronavirus.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

34. United as one

That’s how the heartland does. ‘Merica.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

35. April Fool’s 

Although, this might be footage of Florida over the weekend… #STAYHOME

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

36. Muscle atrophy

Too many leg days?

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

37. How we all feel 

Don’t forget to change out of your daytime pajamas into your nighttime pajamas.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

38. Oh Kermieeee

Is Quarantini a breakfast beverage?

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

39. Pants are always optional 

Video chats should come with a 15 minute courtesy.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

40. The difference a year makes

Just a healthy change in perspective.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

41. Men are from Mars…

He probably does want to talk about it.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

42. Two thumbs up 

“No, really, we don’t mind.”

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon

43. We’ll never forget

The Purell. The panic. The year the world stopped.

Keep your sense of humor, wash your hands, stay home and stop the spread. And more than anything, we hope you and your family stay well.

Humor

That time JFK promised to save Santa from the Soviets

A young girl in Marine City, Mich. overheard her parents talking about Soviet aggression in the Arctic. She didn’t entirely understand what they were talking about, but her parents saying the Russians might test nuclear bombs at the North Pole was cause for concern.


What could she do, except warn the President of the United States?

It was 1961, the height of the Cold War. The very next year would prove to be the biggest test of then-President John F. Kennedy’s mettle against his Soviet adversaries — the Cuban Missile Crisis, but that was months away.

At that moment, however, 8-year-old Michelle Rochon was worried about Santa Claus and his workshop. And she wanted to make certain President Kennedy would do something about the Soviet aggression toward the world’s jolliest elf.

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
Even if he had to go handle it personally.

“I knew nuclear bombs were bad. And if they were testing them at the North Pole, what was Santa going to do?” said Michelle in a phone interview with CBC News. “I just automatically thought I have to write [the President] and maybe he can do something about it.”

Her letter read:

Dear Mr. Kennedy,

 

Please stop the Russians from bombing the North Pole because they will kill Santa Claus.

I am 8 years old. I am in the third grade at Holy Cross School.

 

Yours truly,

Michelle Rochon.

She put the letter in the mailbox, addressed only to “President Kennedy, Washington, D.C.”

To her surprise, the President not only received the letter, but published a photo of him reading it. Her letter became nationwide news. And then, a few weeks later, a letter on White House stationery came in the mail for young Michelle.

(JFK Library | YouTube)

In case you don’t want to watch the video, this was the President’s reply:

Dear Michelle,

 

I was glad to get your letter about trying to stop the Russians from bombing the North Pole and risking the life of Santa Claus.

I share your concern about the atmospheric testing of the Soviet Union, not only for the North Pole but for countries throughout the world; not only for Santa Claus but for people throughout the world.

However, you must not worry about Santa Claus. I talked with him yesterday and he is fine. He will be making his rounds again this Christmas.

 

Sincerely,

John Kennedy

8 things Marines love to carry other than their weapon
Getting a reply from the President made her national news again.

Little Michelle was elated.

“All I understood was that he talked to Santa Claus and he was fine and he’d be coming around this Christmas,” she said. “President Kennedy said so. So, everything was good.”

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