The oddest story to came out of the military this week has got to be that sailor who got drunk at Busch Gardens, stripped off all of his clothes, tried to jump in random peoples' vehicles, and fought the police officers trying to detain him before being taken down by a taser.
Now, if it weren't for the fact that everyone in this numbnut's unit now has to go through one hell of a safety brief, I'd be impressed. Clearly, there was a point where he realized that he'd f*cked up so badly that jail time was inevitable, so he nosedived right into legendary status. BZ. It's better to burn out brightly than to just fizzle, right?
If you didn't go streaking at a beloved, family-friendly amusement park and take a taser dart straight to the family jewels, then you've earned some fresh memes, just for not being a dumbass.
1. He put the 'combat' in "combat cameraman" by getting more head shots than the average sniper.
(Meme via Air Force Nation & Humor)
2. You'd be amazed at how crowded the aid station gets around this time.
(Meme via Shammers United)
3. "Failure to feed, failure to eject, failure to chamber, failure to adapt..."
(Meme via Disgruntled Vets)
4. This is a level of "give a f*ck" shown only by the most senior of specialists.
(Meme via Military Memes)
5. Best part about deploying is you're never going to be practicing D&C because the platoon sergeant can't release you yet.
(Meme via Call for Fire)
6. Who cares if you have TC duties? Extra leg room is extra leg room.
(Meme by Ranger Up)
7. At least the chow hall has more options than "one patty" or "two patties?"
For real. How is there even a debate between In-N-Out and Whataburger?
(Meme via Army as F*ck)
8. At least if you did, your buddy scored a 40/40.
(Meme via Pop Smoke)
9. What if they're not mutually exclusive and your unit is just sh*t?
(Meme via Untied Status Marin Crops)
10. Promote ahead of peers... so he can get in that damn room.
(Meme via Coast Guard Memes)
11. I hope you enjoyed your time back home being dragged around town because your mom wanted to show you off to her cousin's roommate's work friends.
(Meme via Decelerate Your Life)
12. Technically, there's nothing stopping you. Bayonets are conveniently a loophole in the ROI.
(Meme via Valhalla Wear)
13. The enemy won't know what hit 'em when you Baghdad ass up.
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