MIGHTY CULTURE

5 milspouses who dare you to call them dependas

A CEO and a judge top the list.

Military spouses get a bad rap. One need only mention that he or she is a military spouse and the dependa accusations start to flow, especially on social media. But that oft-maligned stereotype is far from the full picture. For every walking caricature, there are hundreds of hard-working, goal getters – pushing past those PCSes, deployments, and solo parenting struggles to blaze their own trails and grab those brass rings. Here are five butt-kicking milspouses who make us all proud.


1. The news anchor

Famous military spouse Brianna Keilar

(live.staticflickr.com)

Brianna Keilar is a CNN anchor, a senior political analyst … and the wife of Army LTC Fernando Lujan. They met when Lujan was working on the National Security Council at the White House and Keilar was CNN's Senior Washington Correspondent. Though Keilar is better known, by far, for her very public day job, she's hardly a closeted milspouse. She hosted events for Blue Star Families in 2018 and 2019 and wrote this essay about covering the news with a husband deployed.

2. The CEO

Cadets in SS394: Financial Statements Analysis learned from Cracker Barrel Old Country Store CEO Sandy Cochran and Dollar General Chairman of the Board Mike Calbert.

(Image via West Point SOSH Facebook page)

Sandy Cochran is pretty much who we all want to be when we grow up. The former Army brat doesn't know how to fail. She was a member of the National Honor Society, the tennis team, captain of the cheerleading squad, and president of her class at Stuttgart American High School. She went to college on an ROTC scholarship and was honor grad of her Ordnance Officer Basic Course. She qualified as a paratrooper and served in the 9th Infantry Division first as a Missile Maintenance Officer in the 1st Battalion, 4th Air Defense Artillery, and then on the Division Staff, while attending night school to earn her MBA.

Cochran left the Army in 1985 (but not the Army lifestyle) and began working her way up the corporate ladder, while married to Donald Cochran, who served in the 82nd Airborne Division, the 101st Airborne Division (Air Assault) and in Army Special Forces as a High Altitude Low Opening (HALO) parachute team leader. Fast forward through a couple of decades' worth of both of the Cochrans' amazing accomplishments (Seriously. They. Have. Done. So. Much.) and in 2009, Sandy was hired as the CFO of Cracker Barrel Old Country Store, Inc. Two years later, she moved into the CEO job, where she has spent nearly a decade successfully leading the company and its 73,000 employees.

3. The judge

President Obama announces nominee Pattie Millett.

(obamawhitehouse.archives.gov)

It's a tale as old as time…Pattie Millett already had an impressive legal career when she met and fell in love with a sailor. Like so many other military spouses, Pattie decided to figure out a way to make it work. She and her husband Bob got married, had two children, and when he deployed, Pattie did the job of two parents raising their children … while also managing her heavy caseload as a lawyer in the United States Solicitor General's office.

And this is where her story is a tad different.

She argued a case before the Supreme Court and briefed five more while her husband was deployed. Then, in August 2013, Pattie became Judge Millett when she was confirmed by Congress to serve as a United States Circuit Judge on the United States Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit, to the seat vacated by Judge (ahem, now Justice) John Roberts, who was elevated to the United States Supreme Court -- where our Pattie had already argued 32 cases. In fact, Pattie's name even made it on the shortlist for a SCOTUS nomination -- and we wouldn't be surprised if she gets considered for that auspicious position again.

Oh, and did we mention that Pattie also has a 2nd Degree Black Belt in Tae Kwon Do? She earned it during all her free time.

4. The Olympian

(Image via Facebook)

When she's all dressed up for her organization's annual gala, you'd be forgiven for mistaking Sally Roberts for a fairy tale princess. But looks can be deceiving. Sally is hardly the type to sit around waiting to be rescued.

Not only is she a two-time Olympic Bronze Medal-winning wrestler and three-time National Women's Wrestling Champion, she's the founder and executive director of Wrestle Like a Girl, a national non-profit organization that is largely responsible for making girls' wrestling a sanctioned high school sport in a growing number of states, bringing women's wrestling into the NCAA, and for girls' wrestling currently being the fastest growing sport in the nation.

Sally, an Army Special Operations veteran and the wife of a recently retired Army Special Forces soldier, started the organization not only to introduce more girls to the sport, but also to show girls that they can do anything.

We can't imagine a better example of that than Sally.

5. The famous actor

ANNA CHLUMSKY

(farm9.staticflickr.com)

Anna Chlumsky's character Amy Brookheimer on the television series "Veep" is unflappable, the kind of woman who can handle absolutely anything. The actor, however, admits that being a military spouse can make her a little … flappable.

Anna and her husband, Shaun So, met when they were both college students at the University of Chicago. He enlisted in the Army Reserves and deployed to Afghanistan while they were dating. Anna wrote about her experiences for Glamour magazine, saying, "Being a family member ... of a serviceman or -woman is a lonely experience. Every military spouse or loved one has, at one time or another, felt as if no one understands what they're going through."

She said her friends were supportive, but they didn't always understand. "The concept of war was so foreign in our cosmopolitan world," Chlumsky wrote. "Either people didn't pay attention at all, or they read too much. I'd meet strangers who, upon discovering my boyfriend was in the Army, would look at me like I was living out some eighties romantic comedy, dating a guy from the wrong side of the tracks."

Sound familiar? Yeah, us too.