7 reasons why 'Top Gun' made you want to become a fighter pilot - We Are The Mighty
Humor

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

The 1980s brought us some fantastic action movies like “Lethal Weapon” and “Die Hard,” which made movie-goers consider joining the police force.


When Tony Scott’s “Top Gun” landed in cinemas across the nation, it was an instant blockbuster, earning over 350 million worldwide according to box office mojo.

With the adrenaline-packed scenes the film offers, “Top Gun” audience members of all ages wanted to be the next Maverick.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Jester’s dead! (Paramount)

Also Read: 5 heroic movie acts a military officer would never do

So check out these reasons why the average Joe would want to be the next great “Top Gun” fighter pilot.

1. Getting a kick-ass callsign

Face it — Maverick and Goose are pretty epic names — but be as original as possible if you get to pick yours.

2. Keeping up with foreign relations

Rarely do allied forces get close to their enemy on the battlefield, but to be inverted while sitting in a cockpit whilst flashing the grand FU gesture — that’s badass.

3. Attracting a hottie

There are many ways to pick up women at a squid bar. If you ever had an issue getting the girl as a civilian, we’ve got a solution: throw on that uniform.

Lady pilots, this works for you, too — just make sure you find a man who can appreciate a strong woman.

Oh, and don’t forget your wingman.

4. Wear aviator sunglasses

Nothing says “I am awesome” like putting on a blacked-out pair of aviators. This look never gets old.

5. Play shirtless volleyball

With arguably no real reason to be in the movie story-wise, the producers had some of Hollywood’s brightest stars in their film at the time and they took advantage.

It’s safe to say that no man, after watching Top Gun, doesn’t think about this scene while playing the popular beach sport.

6. Aerial Dogfighting

This is where the real ass kicking takes place. Naval aviators are some of the world’s best at aerial maneuvering to take down the enemy. All jokes aside, the dogfighting scenes are where the real motivation to be a fighter pilot begins.

Related: 7 kids who joined (even commanded) military units for a day

7. The theme song

We dare you to listen to this without getting amped or googling “how to become a fighter pilot”.

Can you think of any other? Comment below and let us know what your call-sign would be.
Articles

These 8 TV characters would never survive in the real military

Over the years Hollywood has shed both positive and negative light on the military experience. While the biographical examples might face severe scrutiny over matters of accuracy, here are 8 fictional military characters who inarguably wouldn’t cut it in the real deal:


1. Ensign Charles Beaumont Parker – “McHale’s Navy”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

When the military is used as the basis for a sitcom, it’s inevitable that some of the troops won’t exactly be up to snuff. Ensign Parker brings that to another level, actively causing harm to U.S. and Allied Forces. (The show takes place during World War II.) He accidentally fires a depth charge in one episode, and in another accidentally shoots down an Allied aircraft. That’s a level of ineptitude the United States military wouldn’t and frankly couldn’t stand for.

2. Buster Bluth – “Arrested Development”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

Buster is enlists in “Army,” as he calls it, due to a dare a comedian makes to his mother. And lucky for him, he’s immediately honorably discharged after having his hand bit off by a seal. In season 4, he re-enlists to control drones in Iraq. Buster has a blast – until someone explains to him that what he’s doing is real, and he immediately has a panic attack. Then again, Buster once had a panic attack because a llama was near him. He might tell you he’s in Army, but he isn’t Army Strong.

3. Beetle Bailey – “Beetle Bailey”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

One thing you certainly can’t be in any branch of the military is lazy, and Beetle Bailey is perhaps the laziest of them all. He’ll do anything to get out of work, including putting his fellow soldiers, and commanding officers, at serious risks. Luckily, the characters at Camp Swampy don’t seem to face any particular risk of war being declared, and therefore will likely avoid any form of actual combat. If they did face an enemy attack, or were sent to fight someplace, chances are Beetle Bailey would be too lazy to even raise his arms.

4. Gareth Keenan – “The Office” (BBC version)

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

There’s no real reason to doubt Gareth Keenan when he claims he was a Lieutenant in the Territorial Army before joining Wernam-Hogg, aside from how utterly clueless he seems to be when Tim and Dawn quiz him about tactical strategy. Gareth talks a big game, always being prepared to take a man from behind, give a man a lethal blow, or even discharge with rapid speed if enemies should uncover and enter his hole — you know, find out where he’s hiding. The fact Gareth never seems to understand the double entendres behind his own boasts kind of makes him look foolish, perhaps too foolish to actually achieve any kind of rank.

5. Zapp Brannigan – “Futurama”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

Zapp may be a 25-Star General in the Year 3000, buts its impossible to imagine he’d last a single day in any branch of the U.S. military. No part of Brannigan’s success makes sense. Although Brannigan’s Law is named after him, he openly admits he doesn’t understand it in the slightest. In fact, most of Brannigan’s successes are subjugating and annihilating weak and defenseless aliens, which, while smart satire, isn’t something that would actually be tolerated in the military.

6. Don Draper – “Mad Men”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

Don’s a special case on this list, in that his whole story is that he quite literally couldn’t make it in the military. As fans now know, Draper’s mystery actually began with him as Dick Whitman, but things dramatically changed during the Korean War. Terrible things happen during war, and its hard to say how any individual would react when faced with the horrors Whitman and his Lieutenant, the real Don Draper, faced. But what’s clear is Whitman’s reaction is highly illegal and wouldn’t be tolerated in any military.

7. Homer Simpson – “The Simpsons”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

Homer Simpson has had over 100 jobs, and he’s been terrible at nearly every one of them. His time in the service still manages to rank among his most inept. Homer actually joined the service twice—first as a member of the Navy Reserve in Season 9, then in Season 18 he enlisted in the Army. As a member of the Navy Reserve, Homer nearly caused a nuclear war with Russia, and in the Army he turned a training exercise into a city-wide explosive event. The military always welcomes recruits, but Homer should probably stick to his hundreds of other jobs.

8. Dave Titus – “Titus”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

Everyone in the Titus family seems to think it would be a great idea for Dave to join the Army. It could teach him responsibility and get him to stop doing drugs and being lazy. However, his brother Christopher sees it a different way: the Army isn’t going to bring Dave up; Dave’s going to bring the Army down. Fearing “Private Dave” could somehow cause nuclear destruction, Christopher gives Dave some pot to smoke on the way to recruitment, hoping this story will find a less destructive end.

MIGHTY CULTURE

Monty Python’s Black Knight was based on a real fighter

Once in a lifetime, there comes a motion picture which changes the whole history of motion pictures. A picture so stunning in its effect, so vast in its impact, that it profoundly affects the lives of all who see it. One such film is, yes, Monty Python and the Holy Grail. And while I lifted that copy (which was originally intended to be tongue-in-cheek) straight from the trailer, the film’s legacy has proven the trailer correct.


Even those who don’t think they’ve heard some of the most memorable lines from the movie likely have, whether they smell of elderberries or they’ve heard of the knights who say “ni.” Perhaps the most memorable scene, however, is the one where Arthur is forced to fight the Black Knight guarding a small footbridge, one who refuses to accept defeat.

The story that exposes all of the historical narratives and false legends about the chivalry and bravery of Medieval knights through vicious mockery turned history on its head even further in the encounter with the Black Knight. On the Wired podcast “Geek’s Guide to the Galaxy” Monty Python member John Cleese spoke about the inspiration for the Black Knight scene in a memory of his time at school, where he was taught by a two-time World War veteran.

“There was a lovely guy named ‘Jumper’ Gee who died at the age of 101, and who managed to fight in both World Wars—I never came across anyone else who did that. He was a good teacher of English and I liked him enormously, and he would go off on these wonderful excursions where they were nothing to do with the subject he was teaching, and he told this story about a wrestling match that had taken place in ancient Rome. … There was a particularly tough contest in progress, and one of the wrestlers, his arm broke—the difficulty of the embrace was so great that his arm broke under the pressure—and he submitted because of the appalling pain he was in. And the referee sort of disentangled them and said to the other guy, ‘You won,’ and the other guy was rather unresponsive, and the referee realized the other guy was dead. And this was an example to ‘Jumper’ Gee of the fact that if you didn’t give up you couldn’t lose, and I always thought this was a very dodgy conclusion…”
7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

Pictured: The Eleans crowned and proclaimed victor the corpse of Arrhachion.

The story “Jumper” was trying to relate is that of Arrachion of Phigalia, an athlete in ancient Greece who was skilled at the pankration event. Pankration was an event similar to today’s Ultimate Fighting Championship, where the winner must force his opponent to submit, through some kind of brute force. Arrachion was fighting for the championship. One ancient historian described the hold that not only killed Arrachion but caused his opponent to submit to the then-deceased Arrachion’s own hold.

It seems Arrachion’s opponent choked the life from the great wrestler as Arrachion wrapped part of his body around his opponent’s foot. Arrachion yanked the man’s ankle from his leg as the undefeated wrestler died in his opponent’s chokehold, and his opponent was forced to tap out from the pain. Arrachion, now dead, remained undefeated.

He got a statue for his efforts, the stupid bastard.

Articles

The best A-10 memes on the Internet

A while back, Team Mighty posted a story about song lyrics airmen shouldn’t text to each other to avoid punishment from the Air Force. For that list, we created this meme:


7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

Airmen did not love seeing Miley riding their beloved A-10 Thunderbolt II. To repay our debt for defiling the most beloved of Close Air Support airframes, we collected the best memes and internet humor with the A-10 and/or the GAU-8 Avenger. Netizens love the A-10 as much as ground combat troops, so A-10 humor isn’t hard to find.

There are motivational posters.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

There are newer jokes.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

 

And old favorites.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

And even Star Wars A-10 Jokes.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

There are digs at ISIS.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

And digs at the Air Force for trying to get rid of the A-10.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

We love the GAU-8 Avenger, the massive 30mm hydraulic-driven gun, around which the plane is built.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

Most importantly, we love the BRRRRRRRRRRRT

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

And the A-10 is a great way to show your appreciation on Facebook.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

 

Lists

7 things people use every day that originated in the military

The military is responsible for a huge amount of consumer goods and technology that people are using every day. Here are seven examples:


1. Duct tape

The grey tape that can “fix” just about any problem was originally designed for the U.S. military during World War II. While also manufacturing camouflage material, gas masks, and other products for the military, Johnson Johnson was asked to make a waterproof tape for ammunition cases, according to Kilmer House.

Originally called “duck tape,” it “saved valuable time in manufacturing and packaging war materials. A wide variety of tapes to serve a multitude of particular purposes were made for the aviation industry alone,” read the company’s 1945 annual report.

Soldiers quickly figured out duct tape could be used for more than sealing ammo boxes, and they used it to make temporary repairs to jeeps, planes, tents, boots, their uniforms, and everything in between. Troops still use the tape today, as do the rest of us.

 

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Not the intended use (Photo: Youtube)

2. Microwave ovens

You can thank the defense contractor Raytheon for giving you the ability to heat up that leftover pizza in under a minute. While working at the company on radar technology in 1945, Percy Spencer accidentally discovered an active radar set had melted the candy bar in his pocket. He and his colleagues were intrigued, and decided to conduct some more tests.

From Today I Found Out:

The first one they heated intentionally was popcorn kernels, which became the world’s first microwaved popcorn.  Spencer then decided to try to heat an egg.  He got a kettle and cut a hole in the side, then put the whole egg in the kettle and positioned the magnetron to direct the microwaves into the hole.  The result was that the egg exploding in the face of one of his co-workers, who was looking in the kettle as the egg exploded.

Raytheon still holds the patent, with Percy credited as the inventor. The first commercially-produced microwave was a 6-foot-tall, 7000lb monstrosity that cost $5000. But around 1967, a smaller unit at a more affordable $495 finally hit the market, according to Today I Found Out.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

3. Global positioning systems (GPS)

Google Maps may be one the best ways to navigate anywhere, but it owes the Pentagon credit for doing much of the legwork. Amid Cold War tensions with the Soviet Union after it launched Sputnik in 1957, U.S. researchers figured out that radio signals emitted by the satellite increased as it approached and decreased when it moved away, according to TechHive.

TechHive has more:

This gave the scientists a grand idea. Satellites could be tracked from the ground by measuring the frequency of the radio signals they emitted, and conversely, the locations of receivers on the ground could be tracked by their distance from the satellites. That, in a nutshell, is the conceptual foundation of modern GPS. That GPS receiver in your phone or on the dash of your car learns its location, rate of speed, and elevation by measuring the time it takes to receive radio signals from four or more satellites floating overhead.

This discovery became the basis for the military’s system of five satellites, called Transit, launched in 1960. It stayed exclusively a defense technology until 1983, when the Reagan administration opened GPS up for civilian application, according to Mio.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

4. Disposable-blade safety razors

Razors for shaving have been around for centuries, but the safety razor with disposable blades still enjoys widespread popularity due to the U.S. military’s adoption during World War I.

Before the 20th century, men usually had barbers trim their beards and mustaches. If they did shave at home it was with a straight razor, which needed to be sharpened often. In 1901, King C. Gillette changed that, with the invention of the safety razor — which took a disposable version of the straight edge razor and clamped it onto a handle. The military soon took notice.

From About.com:

Production of the Gillette ® safety razor and blade began as the Gillette Safety Razor Company started operations in South Boston. Sales grew steadily. During World War I, the U.S. Government issued Gillette safety razors to the entire armed forces. By the end of the war, some 3.5 million razors and 32 million blades were put into military hands, thereby converting an entire nation to the Gillette safety razor.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

5. Computers

While the original computer was not even as powerful as today’s basic calculators, it was originally designed to compute artillery firing tables for the U.S. Army. Called ENIAC, or Electronic Numerical Integrator and Computer, the new device replaced humans who were physically operating desk calculators, according to Army historian William Moye.

The massive machine took up an entire room at the Army’s Ballistic Research Laboratory when it was unveiled after World War II on Feb. 14, 1946. One of its first projects was to test the feasibility of the hydrogen bomb.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

 

6. The internet

The world’s largest repository of cat videos came from a military research project that used packet-switching to allow computers to talk to each other. The first version of the internet deployed in 1969, called the Advanced Research Projects Agency Network (ARPANET), was made up of just four computers, with one each located at Stanford University, University of Utah, UCLA, and UC-Santa Barbara.

From About.com:

Designed as a computer version of the nuclear bomb shelter, ARPAnet protected the flow of information between military installations by creating a network of geographically separated computers that could exchange information via a newly developed protocol (rule for how computers interact) called NCP (Network Control Protocol).

The first internet service provider emerged in 1974, but the internet would not see widespread use until the invention of hypertext-markup language (HTML) and the world wide web were unveiled in the early 1990s.

 

7. Freeze drying

The ability to keep food preserved for years came from a military effort to keep medical supplies useful after they were transported overseas during World War II. In freeze-drying, food is quickly frozen, then dried slowly to remove the frozen moisture.

The Ready-Store has more:

The freeze-drying process really took off during WWII as a way to transport serums and other medical supplies. Doctors found that medicines that required refrigeration were spoiling by the time they were transported to other parts of the world. The freeze-dried process was invented and allowed for materials to retain their chemical properties and drastically increasing the shelf-life.

Freeze-drying has been used for food and pharmaceuticals. But perhaps most importantly, astronauts use it to have a nice snack in space.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

 

NOW: 9 Military terms that will make you sound crazy around civilians

And: Here’s the military’s incredibly painful ‘OC spray’ training

 

MIGHTY MOVIES

You can own the helicopter from M*A*S*H

For those unfamiliar with it, M*A*S*H was a hit comedy-drama television series that aired on CBS from 1972 to 1983. Following a team of doctors and support staff from the 4077th Mobile Army Surgical Hospital, the show takes place during the Korean War. During the war, the helicopter was a revolutionary platform that allowed for more rapid evacuation of wounded personnel from the battlefield. As such, the H-13 Sioux, known affectionately as the flying fishbowl, played a prominent role in the show. The Bell 47, the civilian model of the H-13, that was used most often in the show is now up for sale.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
(Platinum Fighter Sales)

Bell 47 D1 s/n 263 was built in July 1951 at the Bell Aircraft Assembly Plant in Niagara, New York. The helicopter was assigned to the U.S. Navy where it was used as a training platform. During its naval career, s/n 263 was once shipped from NAS Alameda, California to a Navy base in Japan and flown with floats installed. The helicopter was eventually shipped back to NAS Alameda and surplussed out of the Navy in 1958. It was purchased by the San Bernardino Valley Junior College Aeronautical Division for use as a training aid.

In 1972, the aircraft was put up for sale again. This time, she was purchased by Adrian Grieve, the owner and operator of Pathfinder Helicopters at Flabob Airport in Riverside, California. S/n 263 was completely disassembled and rebuilt to Bell Helicopters specifications. The next year, it received a Standard Airworthiness Certificate from the FAA as Bell 47 D1, N5167V.

Flyable once more, N5167V served as a student trainer, aerial photography platform, aerial surveyor, banner tower, and fruit frost control aircraft. However, the helicopter’s claim to fame is its starring role in M*A*S*H.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
(Platinum Fighter Sales)

In the opening scenes of the show, two helicopters fly together in close formation; N5167V is the ship closest to the camera in the shot. In the second scene, N5167V is the second helicopter on approach to the landing pads. During the ten years of filming, the helicopter was used numerous times both as a set piece and in flying scenes. The helicopter’s last on-screen appearance was during the final departure scene of the show’s series finale, one of the most-watched TV episodes of all time.

In 1981, N5167V was sold to a South Dakota farmer who used the helicopter on his ranch for counting and herding cattle and crop dusting. N5167V was eventually sold to its current owner who restored it to original its M*A*S*H configuration. During over 5,800 flight hours, the helicopter never sustained any damage. Bell 47 D-1 s/n 263 N5167V is up for sale by Platinum Fighter Sales. The company specializes in warbird and classic aircraft brokerage. A poke around their website will reveal plenty of interesting aircraft for sale like a 1959 McDonnell F4H-1F Phantom II, a 1943 Curtiss Wright P-40N-1 Kittyhawk, and even a rare 1944 North American XP-82 Twin Mustang. The M*A*S*H helicopter has no price listed, but offers can be made online. Given the aircraft’s history, it’s expected to sell for a pretty penny.

Lists

7 of the best movie aerial dogfights, ranked

Despite their popularity on the silver screen, many of the best military action scenes don’t depict the heroic storming the beaches of Normandy or cutting through the enemy frontlines in the jungles of Vietnam. In fact, some of the most intense sequences are of the deadly dogfights in the sky.


Several awesome films get overlooked just because there isn’t any land warfare involved. So, to even things out a bit, here are a few of our favorite films that feature dogfights and keep us on the edges of our seats.

Related: 7 of the best drill sergeants to ever hit the screen, ranked

1. Top Gun

When Tony Scott’s Top Gun landed in movie theaters across the country, it was a freakin’ blockbuster, raking in over $350 million worldwide. Filled with plenty of aerial acrobatics, Top Gun made audiences of all ages want to be the next hotshot pilot.

The fight scenes that capped off the film were well-edited, featured a kick-ass soundtrack, and delivered plenty notable one-liners that had moviegoers nodding in approval.

2. Memphis Belle

Directed by Michael Caton-Jones, Memphis Belle follows the brave men crewing a B-17 bomber based in the United Kingdom as they prepare for their final mission over Germany.

The dogfight scenes capture what it must have been like battling wave after wave of well-trained German fighters.

3. Fly Boys

In 2006, James Franco took to the pilot seat playing a young man who volunteered for the French military before the U.S. got involved World War I. The film showcased the intense training and extreme dangers that canopy-less fly boys encountered during the war.

4. Red Tails

This film chronicles a group of African American pilots flying in the Tuskegee program and shows how their bravery maneuvered them right into the history books and America’s hearts.

5. Tora! Tora! Tora!

Considered a classic war film, the story of Tora! Tora! Tora! focuses on the days leading up to the Pearl Harbor attack and makes clear the political context of the surprise Japanese offensive.

The stunning imagery tells the story without much dialogue, which is doubly impressive for a film released in 1970.

6. Red Baron

This German biopic is closely based on the World War I fighter pilot ace, Manfred Von Richthofen, nicknamed the Red Baron. The film’s excellent shot selection and pacing show how skilled warfighters were back then, scoring kills without using the advanced technology we enjoy today.

7. The Eternal Zero

We don’t typically praise the enemy in American cinema, but holy sh*t — director Takashi Yamazaki did an amazing job of putting you in the pilot’s seat in epic aerial battles.

 

Bonus: Les Chevaliers du Ceil (Sky Fighters)

You might be thinking, why did WATM put a French film on the list? Well, this film displays one of the most intense dogfights ever recorded. Between high-voltage camera work and excellent cinematography, you’ll be left guessing what’s real and what’s CG.

Just check out the trailer:

MIGHTY TRENDING

4 ways armies have sent ‘FU’ messages to their enemies

As far back as documented history goes, war has crushed civilizations and built new empires. Regardless of era, military leaders and warlords have long sent visual (or “FU”) messages to their enemies in hopes that emotions, not tactics, take over the battlefield.


Related: 7 badass nicknames enemies have given the American military

With both sides desperate for a victory, the art of mind manipulation can trigger a response that just might reduce the enemy’s will to fight.

1. Tossed in a gutter

ISIS controls many areas in Iraq, but that doesn’t stop members of the Iraqi forces from showing their own progress. 

According to Fox News, Iraqis toss the dead bodies of ISIS members in the street gutters as a form of intimidation to ISIS sleeper cells and their supporters.

2. Drawn and Quartered

Most of us are familiar with William Wallace’s legacy, especially if you’ve seen Mel Gibson’s Braveheart. What the award-winning filmmaker didn’t show was what King Edward did after the end credits rolled.

According to duhaime.org, the King of England ordered his soldiers to cut Wallace’s body into four pieces and post them at the four corners of Britain. Wallace’s head was stabbed with a spike and set on London Bridge for an epic “screw you” message.

 

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
William Wallace statue stands tall in Scotland.

 

3. Capture the flag of your enemies

Those who have had the opportunity to fight in a Taliban-infected area probably noticed the white flags flapping in the wind over extremist strongholds.

Marines love flags, too — especially their own, which wave high above American positions. They also enjoy taking the Taliban flags and putting them on display for the bad guys to see.

 

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Infantrymen from 3rd Battalion 5th Marines Lima Company 2nd Platoon enjoy a moment after capturing a Taliban flag. #wegotyoursh*t

4. A good slicing

Around 500 B.C., a war between the State of Yue and the State of Wu in China broke out.

Gou Jian, the King of Yue, was unsure of his victory over the Wu. To try to gain an element of surprise, Jian ordered 300 of his men to stand in front of the enemy, remove their swords and cut their own throats before the battle began.

The Wu were so completely stunned, Jian was able to send in his attack on the unsuspecting army and defeat them.

(We actually don’t recommend this tactic…)

Can you think of any others? Comment below.

MIGHTY MOVIES

5 reasons ‘The Guardian’ should be in your top ten military films of all time

Apocalypse Now. Full Metal Jacket. Platoon. Top Gun. Black Hawk Down. A Few Good Men. Saving Private Ryan. Kelly’s Heroes. Crimson Tide.

If you ask your circle of friends and family what some of their favorite military films are, you could get literally a hundred different answers. You’d probably have to ask a few more friends and listen to another hundred more before you get someone to organically name 2006’s The Guardian as a movie they’ve even heard of.

Just to get a few FAQ out of the way early on: yes, Kevin Costner and Ashton Kutcher did a film together. Yes, it is based on the military. Yes, it is about the US Coast Guard. Yes, the USCG is an arm of the US Armed Forces.


As you can imagine, there aren’t very many people who would dare call this a good film, but I ask that you pump the brakes a bit and read why The Guardian should be on your list of favorite military films.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

The original DHS

(Image from MilitaryHumor.com)

A movie about the Coast Guard?

As stated above, yes, the Coast Guard is a branch of the military… kind of.

They aren’t, technically, a part of the Department of Defense so there is that odd “one of these things is not like the others” vibe going on, but they are our brothers and sisters, regardless. At one point they were Department of Transportation during peacetime and switched over to Department of Defense, falling under the umbrella of the Navy, during wartime.

They currently fall under the Department of Homeland Security, another departmental move that makes many of us lower-level peons scratch our heads.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

Yes, the USCG got some badasses, too!

(Image from Outsideonline.com)

It features some unheralded badasses

Rescue swimmer seems like the most fitting name for this group of hardened heroes, but they have a much more official title: Aviation Survival Technician. Regardless of all of that, the AST of the US Coast Guard is a certified badass.

It is one of the US military’s most elite careers with about an 80% washout rate. For comparison sake, that’s about the same attrition rate as the Green Beret and Navy SEAL, and higher than the Army Ranger!

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

A bit of split in opinion between the critics and the audience

(Image from Rotten Tomatoes.com)

It’s better than you think

Sure it made less than m in profit (horrible for a major theatrical release). Yes, it is lambasted on movie critiquing platform, Rotten Tomatoes. However, have you seen it?

Give The Guardian a good, genuine, non-biased once over, and you’ll likely find yourself among the 80% of the audience who think this film is rated “fresh.” The film doesn’t tell any groundbreaking story. It is a completely fictionalized account but there are enough moments to draw you in, and that ending is truly special, if not a bit predictable.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

Uh, yea

(Image from 20th Century Fox’s Dude, Where’s My Car?)

It’s one of the few watchable Ashton Kutcher films

Look, Ashton Kutcher is a great man. He is involved in some of the most selfless causes in modern society. He has been instrumental in raising awareness, if nothing else, to the mainstream.

He also has a pretty decent track record when it comes to television. He was key in That 70’s Show, created and hosted Punk’d, replaced Charlie freakin’ Sheen on Two and a Half Men, and is currently putting out the Netflix Show, The Ranch. His television reputation is intact. Filmwise..not so much.

A bit of a holdover of a foregone era in a way, Kutcher doesn’t seem to have the same magic when selected for movie projects as he does with TV. Of the 20+ movies Kutcher has starred in The Guardian is one of about four films that is actually enjoyable without intoxicants.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

Yea… he did this doozy too

(Image from Universal Pictures’ Waterworld)

It’s got Costner being Costner

Similar to his co-star, Kevin Costner has a bit of a checkered history when it comes to choosing movie roles. On the one hand you have films like Dances with Wolves and Hatfields McCoys, two productions that yielded major awards and nominations for Costner.

Then you have Waterworld.

Just take this victory and go.

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11 of the craziest lines ever spoken in battle

In the heat of battle, some people freeze up, some charge forward, and some drop awesome lines like they’re trying to win a rap battle.


These quotes are from the third category.

1. “Two kinds of people are staying on this beach! The dead and those who are going to die! Now, let’s get the hell out of here!”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Troops in an LCVP landing craft approach Omaha Beach on D-Day, June 6, 1944. (Photo: public domain)

This was shouted by Army Col. George Taylor as he urged his men forward at Normandy on D-Day. According to survivors, Taylor yelled a few different versions of this quote during the landings at Omaha Beach and all of them had the desired effect, spurring American soldiers forward against the Nazi guns firing on the beach.

2. “All right. They’re on our left, they’re on our right, they’re in front of us, they’re behind us … They can’t get away this time.”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
(Photo: U.S. Marine Corps)

Marine Corps Lt. Gen. Lewis B. “Chesty” Puller gave us tons of great quotes. This particular one he spit out while Chinese forces surrounded his men at the Chosin Reservoir. The Marines were expected to fight what essentially amounted to a doomed delaying action as the Chinese wiped them out. Instead, the Marines broke out and slaughtered their way through multiple enemy divisions.

3. “Nuts!”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
(Photo: U.S. Army)

Army Brig. Gen. Anthony McAuliffe led the 101st Airborne Division during the Battle of the Bulge. The Americans were outnumbered, surrounded, and running short on supplies when a German delegation requested their surrender. McAuliffe was awoken with the news and sleepily responded “Nuts!” before heading to meet his staff who had to draft the formal response to the German commander.

The staff decided that the general’s initial response was better than anything they could write. While under siege and near constant attack, the paratroopers typed the following centered on a sheet of paper:

December 22, 1944

To the German Commander,

N U T S !

The American Commander

4. “Damn the torpedoes, Full speed ahead!”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Admiral David Farragut during the Civil War. (Photo: Public Domain)

In April 1862, Vice Adm. David Farragut was leading a fleet to capture Mobil Bay, Alabama, and cut off the major port. While sailing into the city, a Union ship hit Confederate mines in the water that were then known as torpedoes. Farragut yelled his now immortal line, sailed through the mines, and was victorious.

5. “Another running gun battle today … Wahoo runnin’, destroyer gunnin'”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

The USS Wahoo was an enormously successful U.S. submarine in World War II that sank five Japanese ships totaling 32,000 tons — including an entire four-ship convoy — during its third cruise. Near the end of the patrol, the Wahoo tried to sink a second convoy but was surprised by a previously unspotted Japanese destroyer outfitted for anti-submarine operations.

The Wahoo was forced to run, evading a barrage from the destroyer’s cannons and a depth charge attack. The commander signaled Pearl Harbor with the above message and escaped. The quote was slightly changed and ran as a headline in the Hawaiian Advertiser after the patrol.

6. “I may sink, but I’m damned if I’ll strike.”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
John Paul Jones was vilified as a pirate in Britain, but was a hero in America. (Photo: Public Domain)

Navy legend John Paul Jones helped create the sea service during the American Revolution and, in an epic battle with the HMS Serapis, gave at least a couple of epic quotes including this one when he was asked to surrender.

A more famous quote from the battle was “I have not yet begun to fight!” but the Navy isn’t sure that Jones actually said it since the words were first attributed to him 46 years after the battle.

7. “Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition!”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
(Photo: U.S. Navy)

During the attack on Pearl Harbor, a Navy chaplain was trying to keep the men of the USS New Orleans going. He saw a group of men tiring as they carried anti-aircraft ammunition to the guns and patted one of them on the back while speaking this phrase to motivate them. It was later incorporated into songs during the war.

8. “They’ve got us surrounded again, the poor bastards.”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
(Photo: U.S. Army Sgt. Bill Augustine)

While Gen. George S. Patton gets most of the headlines for liberating the 101st during the Battle of the Bulge, another tank legend was leading the charge through German lines, Col. Creighton S. Abrams, who allegedly uttered the awesome words above.

Stephen E. Ambrose’s famous book “Band of Brothers” attributes a similar quote, “They’ve got us surrounded — the poor bastards,” to an unknown Army medic. As the story goes, the medic was telling an injured corporal why none of the wounded had been evacuated.

9. “Goddamn it, you’ll never get the Purple Heart hiding in a foxhole! Follow me!”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
(Photo: U.S. National Archives)

A few different books attribute this quote to Marine Capt. Henry P. Jim Crowe. Crowe commanded a regimental weapons company during the land battle on Guadalcanal. A Japanese machine gun had pinned down a Marine advance and Crowe yelled these words to the men huddling in a shell hole. As a group, they charged the guns behind Crowe and took out the enemy position.

10. “Don’t fire until you see the whites of their eyes!”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
(Painting: The Battle of Bunker’s Hill by E. Percy Morgan)

Americans most often associate this line with the Battle of Bunker Hill, but there’s evidence it was said by different officers at a few points in history. At Bunker Hill in 1775, the order was given by at least one of the leaders of Patriot forces building new fortifications on Bunker and Breed’s Hills near Cambridge, Massachusetts. The intent was to preserve the limited powder and shot.

The gambit worked, allowing the Patriots to inflict major damage with their initial volleys, but it wasn’t enough for the outnumbered and outgunned Americans to hold the hills.

11. “Come on, you sons of bitches! Do you want to live forever?”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
(Photo: U.S. Marine Corps)

The above line is commonly attributed to Marine Corps legend Sgt. Maj. Dan Daly, though there’s some question on whether he said it and — if he did — if those were his exact words. Daly once told a Marine historian that he yelled “For Christ’s sake, men — Come on! Do you want to live forever!”

The Marine who recounts hearing “Come on, you sons of bitches! Do you want to live forever?” was in another part of the battlefield, so it’s possible that two Marines yelled similar lines in different parts of Belleau Wood or that someone misremembered a line yelled in one of World War I’s most dramatic battles.

Either way, the quote is pretty awesome.

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5 differences between Army and Marine Corps infantry

The U.S. Army and U.S. Marine Corps infantrymen pride themselves on being some of the biggest badasses on every block they roll into. They have more similarities than differences, but they’re unique forces. Here are 5 ways you can tell Marine and Army infantry apart:


Note: For this comparison we are predominantly pulling from the Army’s Infantry and Rifle Platoon and Squad field manual and the Marine Corps’ Introduction to Rifle Platoon Operations and Marine Rifle Squad. Not every unit in each branch works as described in doctrine. Every infantry unit will have its own idiosyncrasies and units commonly change small details to deal with battlefield realities.

1. Platoon Organization

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Photo: US Marine Corps Cpl. Artur Shvartsberg

Army and Marine Corps rifle platoons share many elements. They are both organized into larger companies, both contain subordinate squads organized into fire teams, and both employ the rifleman as their primary asset. The Army platoon has a radiotelephone operator and a medic. The Marine platoon has a radio transmitter operator and a corpsman who fulfill the same functions.

The Marine Corps rifle platoon contains three rifle squads. Each squad is led by a sergeant who has three fire teams working for him, each led by a corporal. The fire team leader typically carries the M203 grenade launcher slung under his M16. Operating under him are the automatic rifleman, assistant automatic rifleman, and rifleman.

The Army platoons contain smaller squads. An Army rifle squad leader is typically a sergeant or staff sergeant who leads two four-man fire teams. Each Army fire team consists of a team leader, an automatic rifleman, a grenadier, and a rifleman. Note that the Army squad is using a dedicated grenadier in place of an assistant automatic rifleman. Typically, one rifleman in each squad will be a squad designated marksman, a specially trained shooter who engages targets at long range. Also, the Army has an additional squad in each platoon, the infantry weapons squad. This squad has teams dedicated to the M240B machine gun and the Javelin missile system.

Both Marine Corps and Army infantry platoons operate under company and battalion commanders who may add capabilities such as rockets or mortars when needed.

2. Weapons

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Photo: US Navy Mass Communications Petty Officer 2nd Class Kim Smith

The Army typically gets new weapons before the Marine Corps. It moved to the M4 before the Marine Corps did, and soldiers are more likely than Marines to have the newest weapons add-ons like optical sights, lasers, and hand grips. Marines will get all the fancy add-ons. They just typically get them a few years later.

When the Army needs a rocket or missile launched, they can use SMAWs, AT-4s, or Javelins. For the Marine Corps, SMAW is the more common weapons system (they can call heavier weapons like the Javelin and TOW from the Weapons Company in the battalion).

The Army is quickly adopting the M320 as its primary grenade launcher while the Marine Corps is using the M203. The M320 can be fired as a stand-alone weapon. Either the M320 or M203 can be mounted under an M16 or M4.

3. Fires support

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Photo: US Marine Corps

Obviously, infantry units aren’t on their own on the battlefield. Marine and Army rifle units call for assistance from other assets when they get bogged down in a fight. Both the Marine Corps and the Army companies can get mortar, heavy machine gun, and missile/rocket support from their battalion when it isn’t available in the company. For stronger assets such as artillery and close air support, the services differ.

Marines in an Marine Expeditionary Unit, an air-ground task force of about 2,200 Marines, will typically have artillery, air, and naval assets within the MEU. Soldiers in a brigade combat team would typically have artillery support ready to go but would need to call outside the BCT for air or naval support. Air support would come from an Army combat aviation brigade or the Navy or Air Force. Receiving naval fire support is rare for the Army.

4. Different specialties

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Photo: US Navy Phan Shannon Garcia

While all Marines train for amphibious warfare, few soldiers do. Instead, most soldiers pick or are assigned a terrain or warfare specialty such as airborne, Ranger, mountain, or mechanized infantry. Ranger is by far the hardest of these specialties to earn, and many rangers will go on to serve in Ranger Regiment.

The Marine Corps categorizes its infantry by weapons systems and tactics rather than the specialties above. Marine infantry can enter the service as a rifleman (0311), machine gunner (0331), mortarman (0341), assaultman (0351), or antitank missileman (0352). Soldiers can only enter the Army as a standard infantryman (11-B) or an indirect fire infantryman (mortarman, 11-C).

5. Elite

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Army Rangers conduct a mission in Afghanistan. (Photo: US Army)

Marines who want to push themselves beyond the standard infantry units can compete to become scout snipers, reconnaissance, or Force Recon Marines. Scout snipers provide accurate long-range fire to back up other infantrymen on the ground. Reconnaissance Marines and Force Recon Marines seek out enemy forces and report their locations, numbers, and activities to commanders. Force Recon operates deeper in enemy territory than standard reconnaissance and also specializes in certain direct combat missions like seizing oil platforms or anti-piracy.

Soldiers who want to go on to a harder challenge have their own options. The easiest of the elite ranks to join is the airborne which requires you to complete a three-week course in parachuting. Much harder is Ranger regiment which requires its members either graduate Ranger School or get selected from Ranger Assessment and Selection Program. Finally, infantry soldiers can compete for Special Forces selection. If selected, they will leave infantry behind and choose a special forces job such as weapons sergeant or medical sergeant. Infantrymen can also become a sniper by being selected for and graduating sniper school.

MIGHTY MOVIES

This new movie pits a diabolical sniper against Army special operators

We’re always on the look out for new military flicks, and this one caught our eye.


A new sniper movie featuring WWE superstar John Cena and Aaron Taylor Johnson — the nerdy hero in Kick-Ass and Kick-Ass 2 — is hitting theaters in March 2017.

The movie studio describes the film as a deadly psychological thriller that follows two soldiers pinned down by an Iraqi sniper with nothing but a wall between them.

From the looks of the trailer, the bad guy is a psychopath who likes to play with his targets before he takes the killing shot.

It leaves you wondering how in the heck they’ll make it out alive. Here’s the trailer for “The Wall”:

Amazon Studios, YouTube
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11 Photos That Show That The ‘Little Bird’ Has A Big Mission

Although the H-6 was initially fielded by the U.S. Army in the early ’60s, it wasn’t until the failed “Eagle Claw” mission in 1980 that the service started getting serious about supporting special operations with helicopters.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
An MH-6 on short final with Rangers on the skids ready for action. (Photo: U.S. Army)


Since that time “Little Birds” have been used in crucial special operations missions across the globe from Panama to Somolia to Iraq and Afghanistan.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
(Photo: U.S. Army)

Little Birds are operated by the 160th Special Operations Aviation Regiment (Airborne), the “Night Stalkers”

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Rangers prepare to dismount from a Little Bird during a training exercise. (Photo: U.S. Army)

The Night Stalkers operate a variety of helicopter models including the Chinook and Blackhawk, all modified for special operations missions.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
MH-6 lands near a parked MH-47 Chinook. (Note Chinook’s refueling probe for long-range missions.) (Photo: U.S. Army)

Little Birds come in two basic variants — troop transport and attack. The attack version — the AH-6 — is armed with two M134 miniguns, two M260 7-shot Hydra 70 rocket pods. Alternately, the AH-6 can be armed with Hellfire anti-tank missiles, air-to-air Stingers, Mk-19 40 mm automatic grenade launchers, or .50 caliber machine guns.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Little Bird static display showing rocket pods and other weapons hard points. (Photo: U.S. Army)

In September 1987, Night Stalkers participated in Operation Prime Chance, engaging and neutralizing an Iranian ship that was being used for mine laying. Little Birds attacked the threat while using aviator night vision goggles and forward-looking infrared devices over water, the first successful night combat engagement under these conditions.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Pilot using NVGs. (Photo: U.S. Army)

The Little Bird can carry up to six troops, three on each side, but usually they limit the number to two per side.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Little Bird flares during an insertion demo conducted at a NASCAR event in Kansas. (Photo: U.S. Army)

Little Bird pilots get specialized training in close quarters flying and night ops and those skills are heavily leveraged once they get to the Night Stalkers.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Trainer version of the Little Bird. (Photo: U.S. Army)

When not at war Little Bird pilots train as intensely as the special operators they carry.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
House takedown exercise with a section of Little Birds. (Photo: U.S. Army)

After all, they set themselves to a very high standard: According to it’s mission statement the 160th Special Operations Aviation Regiment (Airborne) is constantly ready to arrive time-on-target plus or minus 30 seconds.

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot

And here’s the last thing an insurgent might see . . .

7 reasons why ‘Top Gun’ made you want to become a fighter pilot
Little Bird on final approach with Rangers at the ready. (Photo: U.S. Army)

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