Blues, Pinks and Greens, NWUs, Cammies, ABUs, ODUs, ACUs — whatever you wear, or whatever you call it, it’s the standard in your branch. These are names of the most common daily wear (and dress uniforms) of military branches. Though the uniforms themselves vary among the ranks and jobs, the jokes usually do not. After all, there are ample rules and variations, and it’s tough to keep it all straight. Besides, what fun is it if you don’t poke fun at the next branch’s duds? Don’t worry though, it’s all in good fun.
Take a look at these military uniform inspired memes and the people who proudly represent them every day of the year.
Life as a First Kid likely isn’t easy. From a young age, these kids are put into the public spotlight (and a political one at that), they roll with security, they live in the massive White House, and pretty much everything they do is scrutinized by the public. But it’s sure to come with some huge perks too! Big parties, fancy foods and access to some of the coolest events that “normal” kids can only dream about. Overall, it’s definitely give and take.
Check out these hilarious memes that perfectly describe life as a First Kid … and for their adoring public, who’s just waiting to see what they do next.
1. As a First Kid, you have to sit around for the boring stuff
Ugh, anyone whose Mom has talked too long in the grocery store feels this.
2. But sometimes you can’t-stop-won’t-stop and people actually recognize
Get it, girl.
3. Meanwhile, everyone judging like they get a say
Girl’s gotta earn that extra spending cash!
4. Role reversal
Sometimes the kids are the ones who get to call out their parents.
5. There really is a resemblance
We can’t unsee it now.
6. When somehow it became fun to put your face everywhere
Mad Photoshop skills though.
7. When you’re a fan and aren’t sure what to say
You can never go wrong with a thumbs up. Add a double and there’s nothing you can’t do, First kid.
So apparently there are talks within the Senate to give each troop who deployed under the Global War on Terrorism $2,500 as part of the AFGHAN Service Act, which would also negotiate the end of the conflict.
On one hand, sure. I’d love the money. Bills suck ass and cash is king. On the other hand, well, let’s look at the lettering of the bill. It’s a one-time payment, and it’d be sent out to every troop who’s deployed anywhere under the Global War on Terrorism. I can only imagine the impending sh*tstorm that’d come when everyone got that check in the mail.
Deploying one time to Kuwait would get you the money, deploying multiple times to Afghanistan still only gets you one check and the older vets who served before 9/11 get nothing. See where I’m going here? The veteran community will turn into the freakin’ Thunderdome. But then again… that is a rent payment…
Anyways, enjoy some memes before the ensuing sh*tstorm!
Serving as President of the United States is no easy task. But, with all due respect, it still leaves you at the mercy of the rest of the population to turn you into memes. It’s almost our duty as constituents. Join us as we poke fun — gently — at our commanders in chief and their most recognizable qualities.
This perfect Harry Potter reference
Don’t worry, Joe, NOT SLYTHERIN.
2. Because even presidents tell lame jokes
That still make us LOL
3. When photoshop makes Karen jokes even more hilarious
Oh snap! The first official recruiting ad for the Space Force has finally dropped! Don’t get me wrong. I’m just as hyped as everyone else who joked to their retention NCO that the only way they’d stay in was to reclass as a space shuttle door gunner.
But, like, why do they even need an advertisement at this point? Everyone knows who they are and are already planning on camping out at the recruitment offices when they open. It’s like seeing a commercial for a Ferrari. It’s just a waste of time and money when we’re already sold on the idea.
Whatever. They’re probably going to have a bigger budget than the Air Force – so spend it if you got it, right? Anyway, here are some memes.
1. I don’t care about any of your damn stories from Basic. But you can be damn sure that I’ll play along with whatever BS lie about how badass you are to tell civilians.
2. While we’re in, we all sh*ttalk chief for being OFP. But, he’s literally treating the military like it’s a 9-5 job at that point.
3. North Korean generals got nothing on some of the E-4’s I’ve seen these days…
4. Anyone know if the vehicles in the motorpool are still fine? No one’s been around to kick their tires in ages!
5. All else fails, pocket sand…
6. One makes things go boom. The other prevents things from going boom. See the problem?
7. Largest amphibious landing in military history and it wasn’t conducted by the branch of the military specifically designed for such a task…
(Yeah, I know. They were in the Pacific and Marine generals assisted in the planning. I thought Marines were at least supposed to understand jokes.)
8. “Ah, I see you’re a man of culture as well.”
9. For the Space Force? In a heartbeat. Then again, I’ve been out for a few years, put on a few pounds, have literally no applicable skills needed in space… But I’d do it.
10. Well. Now I’m going to rewatch Band of Brothers this quarantine… for the 101st time…
11. As long as you don’t have flat feet. (Is flat feet still a thing?)
12. f it looks right, it is right.
13. If you didn’t jump up out of your bunk, but forgot that you’re on the lower one, so you smack your head so damn hard it echoes through the bay, did you even go to basic/boot camp?
We’ve all had that moment — attempting to describe something to a non-military friend. And as you hear yourself explaining it you realize it makes zero sense. Sigh. Welcome to military life, civilian acquaintance. No matter how many times you try to explain it, it doesn’t seem to get any easier, either.
Take a look at these totally relatable moments as to how it feels to explain the suck, decode acronyms, and essentially translate an entire language to someone who’s not in the know.
New town and new life ahead … at least that’s the plan. At some point. In the meantime you’re waiting on orders, waiting on movers and waiting to start your life in a completely new location. That’s the life of a military affiliated family member. Whether you’re active duty yourself or serve dutifully as a milspouse, PCSing never seems to go as planned. This doesn’t come as a shock to anyone. However, we somehow still find some grace, some positivity and some humor in moving to the next duty station.
Take a look at these memes that describe how and when everything goes wrong, and how we can laugh it off in the process.
It would’ve been easier to spread this all out.
Common sense, man.
2. If this isn’t the truest thing we’ve ever seen
The odds are never in our favor.
3. Sprinting to file paperwork ASAP
An “adventure” or “cluster of too much to do”?
4. Splurge for the extra copies. Just do it.
Hand it out like candy.
5. We’re still here
Thanks for asking that super obvious question.
6. Bye, nerds.
*Hopes you’re never stationed with them again.*
7. When you’re tired of asking over and over again
WHAT is taking so long though?
8. But really who named this thing anyway?
We all know it’s NOT forever.
9. I love PCSing, it’s my favorite. PCSing is the best. Among others.
It’s true, no one says it.
10. This is a constant fear:
Will it all arrive in one piece? Only time will tell.
PCSing is no joke. Whether it’s your first or 10th, you go through the same rapid emotions and ups and downs. Including all of the hurrying up and waiting, lost and/or changing plans, and everything in between.
There’s no denying that 2021 has started with a bang – good or bad, we’ve had a dramatic first few weeks of January. But, this is also a stark difference to what we were hoping it would be. For some reason, the majority of the population had an unwavering, illogical view that with the New Year, we’d all have a change of fate and everything would be better. Like magic. The clock flipped and all the bad stuff would disappear … or at least take a sharp turn toward the decline.
That has – obviously – turned out to not be true. However, the transition and lack of smoothness has left us with a whole slew of memes. Join us as we chuckle about our own blindness to reality, and the jokes that came along with it.
The 2021 NYE party we wished we’d had
What a snoozer.
2. Still no travel plans in the foreseeable 2021 future
Yet so many dishes.
3. Don’t forget the laundry
Cycle watching is the new streaming alternative.
4. Meanwhile, the online shopping is getting even more disappointing.
*clicks return now* At least in 2021, returns are easier than they used to be.
5. For anyone who tried an at-home haircut
Just wait it out folks, please.
6. There’s always background filters
Travel anywhere with a green screen and a swipe, because that’s about all you’re allowed to do in the first few months of 2021.
7. But hey, spring is coming soon
HOPEFULLY it’s the perfect weather for evening out those mask lines.
8. The latter is the January we actually got
Hopes were dashed; breakfasts were ruined.
9. When you wake up and everything got crazy
We just wanted a little rest. Sigh. 2020’s boredom naps are forecasted to continue well into 2021.
10. But no matter what, resist the urge to get bangs!
This is something even the New Year can’t fix.
We may not have started off the year the way we planned, but there are always memes to be made. From unfortunate haircuts, to canceling yet one more set of travel plans, so far, 2021 is not turning out to be the breath of fresh air that we had hoped for. But it’s here and we’re tackling it the best way we know how: with dumb jokes on the Internet. Go forth meme makers and continue your good work.
I’ve already made up my mind that if the Space Force starts opening up its doors to include combat arms within my lifetime, I’d be at the recruiting office in a heartbeat. It doesn’t matter that knowing how I’d react, I’d probably be a random Red Shirt who’d have his back turned at the worst possible moment and say something ironic like “the coast is clear!” before getting eaten by something.
Then Senator Ted Cruz in a Senate hearing advocating the Space Force planted the ultimate idea in my head… Space Pirates. Sure, the memes were taken slightly out of context because he was referring to rogue nations attacking satellites and not the swashbuckling buccaneers we’re thinking of. But is it a bad thing that kinda makes me want to join the Space Force even more?
It’ll take far too long for us to make first contact with aliens yet it’ll only take a few decades for space travel to be affordable enough for us to get down on some Firefly or Babylon 5-type action. We’re counting on you, Elon Musk. Make this dream come true!
While we wait for the cold dark reality that the Space Force will probably be far less exciting in our lifetimes than pop culture expects, here are some memes.
(Meme via Not CID)
(Meme via Air Force Nation Humor)
(Meme via Team Non-Rec)
“I don’t know, Hanz, he said something about my mother being a hamster and my father smelling like elderberries.”
Fun fact: The insult from Monty Python was actually implying that King Arthur’s mom reproduced fast like a small rodent and his father was a drunk who could only afford the lowest quality wine. The more you know!
By now you’ve more than likely heard the news that there was a soldier who fell into the Kilauea volcano. His identity hasn’t been made public, and it’s probably for the best. What is known is that he ignored all of the railings and safety protocols put in place that normal tourists follow, and then he fell 70 feet into the pit.
Before everyone starts worrying about volcano safety briefs coming soon to your obviously volcano-free installation, just know that the only bit of information that we know of him is that he was an officer. Which makes absolute sense and I’m going to go out on a limb and imply that he was the type of officer who wouldn’t go to weekend safety briefs anyways.
Well. The Hawaii County Fire Department chief has said that “He obviously is doing remarkably well for his fall; only time will tell what injuries he has.” So knowing that he’s not in any grave danger – that opens the door for any and all ridicule! Because it takes a certain type of ASVAB-waiver to commission someone who’s willing to look at all of the signs saying it’s a freaking volcano and all the railings around said volcano only to say “This selfie will look cool as f*ck on my Instagram!”
Anyways. Here are some memes to help you get over the added section to every single troops’ safety brief this weekend about using common sense around active pits of boiling lava.
You’ve done the crafts, you’ve read the entire internet and you’ve finished Netflix. All there’s left to do is cry, eat and laugh. We’ll help you out with the last one. Hope you and yours are staying safe, healthy and somewhat sane.
These are your top 50 memes and tweets for the week of April 20:
1. Everything is fine
At least he’s maintaining social distancing.
2. The word of the mom
3. Conference calls
Zoom backgrounds make it better.
4. Laughter IS the best medicine
Oh Dad. So smart.
5. Happy little tree
I want peopleeeeeee.
6. Atta boy
Nothing to see here, nothing to see.
7. True transformation
I’m not proud of how hard I laughed at that one!!
8. The boombox
We’ve trained our whole life for this.
9. So loud
What are you eating, BONES?
10. M.J. knew
Now if we could just heal the world…
11. More vodka, please!
These are good life skills.
12. Reality tv
No wonder my kids like to watch other kids playing with toys on YouTube. We do the same thing with HGTV.
13. No pants
I can’t imagine having to wear shoes to a meeting again…
14. Hand washing
So many temptations to touch your face.
15. Catch me outside
How bout dat?
16. Shady pines
Might have to binge watch Golden Girls.
17. So much truth
If you having tortilla chips for breakfast means I don’t have to cook…
18. Iguana private office
Something about you getting on the phone screams, “COME TALK TO ME.”
19. SPF 15
At least you’re getting your vitamin D.
20. Dreams do come true
You bought it “for the pandemic.”
21. Pro tip
It’s like working out, but easier.
The sun is not impressed.
Every parent ever.
The sweatshirt is a nice touch. I bet her Barbie dream house is covered in crafts and regret.
25. Jax beach
26. What happens in Vegas…
Quarantine needs to stay in April 2020.
27. SO much truth
And most of them look tired.
28. Pajama shorts
Trick question. You don’t have to wear pants.
29. Good PR
Mmm ice cream.
30. Singing in the rain
31. Sick car
Taped together and barely holding on — a working title of everyone’s 2020 memoir.
32. Get it girl
No but seriously, why did I eat all my snacks?
33. Dun-dun. Dun-dun. Dun-dun.
To be fair, everyone didn’t die.
34. Lightning speed
Well played, fastest man in the world.
35. All by myself
We feel you, Ernie.
The isolation has turned to boredom.
We heard there’s a DUI checkpoint in the hallway though, so be careful.
38. Last nerves
Every. Little. Thing.
39. Grooming at home
All of our DIY haircuts and grooming.
40. Apologies, ya’ll
Lots of self-awareness happening.
It does, Kermie. It does.
42. Mind over matter
Beware my special powers.
43. Dogs know the truth
Stop judging me.
44. You can’t have both
This is why we can’t have nice days.
Deep thoughts by Dad.
46. Zoom stand in
I think people would pay for this.
47. You did it!
At least you didn’t quit.
48. Pinky promise
Just boxed wine. Not the ‘rona.
49. You know that’s right
Maybe you’ll get a “spa day” in the bathroom by yourself.
I’m calling it now. This weekend will be one of the quietest weekends in recent history. Why? It has nothing to do with 2nd MARDIV’s insane level of micromanaging and everything to do with how lower enlisted troops think.
For starters, it’s a non-pay day weekend for the second time in a row. Less shenanigans when everyone is broke as Hell. Secondly, NCOs will know exactly where everyone is located at any given moment. Friday night? They’re all out seeing Avengers Endgame. Saturday afternoon? In the barracks playing the new Mortal Kombat game. Saturday night? Probably seeing Avengers again. Sunday? Too hungover (I said quiet, not uneventful) and Sunday night will be Game of Thrones.
If you’re an NCO trying to find a good reason to cheer up your sergeant major, pointing out the lack of blotter reports on their desk will surely help.
Here’s to a quiet, entertainment filled weekend. Enjoy some memes.
(Meme via Coast Guard Memes)
(Meme via Not CID)
(Meme via Lock Load)
(Meme via Call for Fire)
(Meme via Smokepit Fairytales)
(Meme by Devil Dog Actual)
(Meme via Valhalla Wear)
(Meme via Private News Network)
(Meme via Decelerate Your Life)
(Meme via Air Force Nation Humor)
(Meme via Air Force amn/nco/snco)
(Meme by Ranger Up)
My ass is firmly in the “why leave a perfectly good aircraft” category.
Call me a leg, but at least we use Air Assault these days.