24 historic photos made even more amazing with color - We Are The Mighty
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24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

The world was not black and white until the 1950s. We know this, of course, but sometimes, it’s difficult to put the images that shape our perceptions in this context. The history of war photography can take us all the way back to see Arthur Wellesley, the Duke of Wellington, the architect of Napoleon Bonaparte’s downfall. Most of us can only imagine seeing the people of this era in the form of a painting, but paintings are meant to be dramatized, to be surreal, not true to life.


Of all the sections available on reddit, few are more engaging and interesting than r/ColorizedHistory (also, now available via Twitter).

The contributors are both amateur and professional artists, taking historical photos — both famous and lesser known — and adding true color to them, using a mixture of natural talent for color and historical research. their work is not limited to military photos, but there are many to be found there. Here are some of their best, in color as vibrant as human history itself.

1. Civil war veterans at Gettysburg anniversary. A Union veteran and a Confederate veteran shake hands at the Assembly Tent, 1913.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

2. This is Nashville from the Capital building during the Civil War in 1864. Colorized by Sanna Dullaway.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

3. Here is a group of boot-blacks surrounding an old Civil War veteran in 1935 Pennsylvania. Colorized by Sanna Dullaway.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

4. This portrait of President Abraham Lincoln was taken toward the end of the Civil War, in Feb. 1865. Even without color, one could see the toll the war took on the president. In color, the hardship seems drastic. Color by Redditor zuzahin.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

5. This 1899 photo of shipmates boxing on the deck of the USS New York was brought to life by Ryan Urban.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

6. British troops on their way to the Western Front, 1939.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

7. This photo was originally taken in San Francisco the day after the Bombing of Pearl Harbor. Also colorized by Sanna Dullaway.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

8. These British soldiers are wearing gas masks to protect their eyes while peeling onions at Tobruk, Oct. 15 1941. Color by Jared Enos.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

9. “Here lies an unknown English Lieutenant killed in air combat.” Western Desert, Egypt, 1941. Color by Lalz Kuczynski.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

10. Below is the crew of the USS Hornet manning their 40mm guns in 1945.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

11. A Stuart light tank, fitted with a hedge cute and heavily sandbagged against ‘panzerfausts,’ supports U.S. infantry in the bocage, July, 1944.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

12. An American medic treats a badly wounded German soldier.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

13. Russian children watch the Luftwaffe bomb their city during Operation Barbarossa, the German invasion of the Soviet Union.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

14. A typical Marine aid station on Saipan, during the Pacific War in 1944. Color by Jared Enos.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

15. The face of an 18-year-old Russian girl after she was liberated from the Dachau Concentration Camp in April 1945.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

16. “A Yank in Versailles” Pvt. Gordon Conrey of Milford, N.H., one of the first Americans to visit Versailles after its liberation from the Germans in 1944, standing in the Hall of Mirrors.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

17. Soldiers with the 2nd Armored Division sing “Go to Town” in Barento, France, 1944. Color by Jared Enos.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

18. Two Sikhs man a Bren Gun in Italy, 1944.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

19. Two U.S. soldiers of 3rd Infantry Division seek shelter behind a M-4 Sherman tank near Düren, Germany, December 1944. Color by Jared Enos.

Two U.S. soldiers of C Company, 36th Armored Infantry Regiment, 3rd Infantry Division seek shelter behind a M-4 Sherman tank at Geich, near Düren, Germany, on 11 December 1944.

20. Times Square on D-Day, June 6, 1944. Color by Jared Enos.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

21. Members of the Tuskegee Airmen.
24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

22. Stalin and Churchill in Livadia Palace during the Yalta Conference, February 1945. Color by Redditor zuzahin.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

23. Russian women and children recently liberated from a German concentration camp lay flowers at the bodies of four dead American soldiers.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

24. Nazi General Anton Dostler facing the Firing Squad in 1945 after being found guilty of war crimes. Color by Mads Madsen.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

(If you colored any of the photos shown, please email me at blake.stilwell@wearethemighty.com and I’ll add your credit.)

NOW: A new Civil War film tells the true story of the southerner who seceded from the Confederacy

Articles

7 mysteriously missing body parts of military leaders

When dictators get toppled or governments change, things get chaotic, to say the least. Sometimes a despotic leader gets to escape to Saudi Arabia to live the rest of his life, presumably not eating people.


24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Looking at you, Idi Amin. You know what you did.

Democracies tend to have a more peaceful transfer of power, ones that don’t involve revolutionaries storming buildings and stringing people up. But in any conflict, there is always the chance that something will get lost to history.

I’m willing to bet these seven military leaders didn’t expect to end up as a decoration somewhere.

1. Oliver Cromwell’s Head

Cromwell has been called a lot of things: tyrant, dictator, hero. It all depends on your point of view. When he died in 1658, the state gave the former Lord Protector of England a fine funeral under his son, the new Lord Protector, Richard.

Unfortunately, Richard sucked at his job and the monarchy was restored. The new king, Charles II put everyone who killed his father, King Charles I, on trial immediately, with no exceptions. This included Oliver Cromwell’s corpse.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Beat that, Game of Thrones.

Cromwell’s dead body unsurprisingly stayed silent on his guilt or innocence, was pronounced guilty, and hanged. He was then beheaded and the head put on a spike outside Parliament.

For like, 20 years.

In 1685, a storm blew the spike down, and sent the head flying into Parliament Square. It was picked up by guard who secretly took it home to sell it for cash. Instead, he got cold feet and hid it in the chimney until the day he died.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
No, this is not another stupid Jeff Dunham bit.

To make a long story short, the head was sold from collector to collector for a full 301 years before it was reburied in Cambridge.

2. Napoleon Bonaparte’s Penis

In 2007, Evan Lattimer’s father died. From him, she inherited Napoleon Bonaparte’s penis even though the French government swears the little corporal is not that of the Emperor.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Napoleon or not, someone’s penis is missing.

In 1821, he died in exile on the island of St. Helena and while the British weren’t watching, the Corsican conducting Napoleon’s autopsy cut off a few pieces for some reason.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

It traveled around the world for decades, eventually ending up under the bed of American urologist John Kingsley Lattimer, who put it there and seldom showed anyone because “Dad believed that urology should be proper and decent and not a joke.”

3. Benito Mussolini’s Leg and Brain

Mussolini met a pretty ignominious end during WWII. He was captured by Italian anti-Fascist partisans, beaten and then strung up by his feet. The U.S. Army ordered the bodies taken down and eventually placed Il Duce in la tomba.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
I hope they buried his fashion sense with him.

His unmarked grave was found by three young fascists who dug him up and took the body from place to place, eventually ending up in a monastery near Milan. By the time his body was found, it was missing a leg. The legless body was interred in his family crypt in Predappio.

The fun doesn’t stop there. While the body was in American custody, an autopsy was performed on the dictator’s brain. The Americans took half of the brain in an attempt to study what makes a dictator, returning it in 1966.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Can you imagine the shipping costs for a head that size?

Every now and again, however, vials pop up on eBay, claiming to be the Italian’s remains. His leg was never found.

4. King Badu Bonsu’s Head

Dutch colonists in what is today called Ghana got pretty pissed when the Chief of the local Ahanta tribe killed two Dutch messengers, cut their heads off, and put them on his throne.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Kinda like that, but with severed heads.

The Dutch, slightly miffed at having their citizens used as decoration, responded the way most colonizers would – with a punitive expedition. They captured Badu Bonsu and lopped off his head. This time, instead of putting it on a chair, they put it in a jar. Of formaldehyde.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
He looks thrilled about it.

Fast forward two hundred years later, the Netherlands have gracefully decided to give the old man’s head back to his home country. You might think the people who happened to be carrying around the pickled head of an African chief might keep track of it but no. It was found locked in a closet where it had presumably been for 170 years.

5. Che Guevara’s Hair

The Cuban revolutionary met his end in Bolivia in 1967, executed by Bolivian forces. His hands were cut off as proof and his body was thrown into an unmarked grave. But, like the people who surrounded Napoleon after his death, someone with access to Guevara’s body decided to take home a souvenir.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

The person who happened to be present and bury Guevara was also a CIA spook. He kept a scrapbook that included photos, documents, fingerprints, and a lock of Guevara’s hair. In 2007, it was all sold at auction for $100,000.

6. Geronimo’s Skull

In 2009, native tribes sued the Yale University secret society known as the Order of Skull and Bones. They alleged the group had the skull of Apache leader Geronimo on display in the clubhouse. And the Apaches wanted it back.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
There’s a lot of things Native Americans probably want back.

Geronimo died as a POW at Fort Sill, Oklahoma, in 1909. A Skull and Bones legend says Prescott Bush, father of George H.W. Bush and grandfather to George W. Bush, dug up the Apache’s body and stole the skull and other bones. He then brought it to the clubhouse in New Haven, Connecticut.

7. Thomas Paine’s Entire Body

Unlike everyone else on this list whose head or skull was stolen after death, Thomas Paine’s good friend John Jarvis was already thinking about getting his hands on the famous patriot’s noggin. Paine, of course, asked Jarvis to leave his bones the hell alone. When Paine died in 1809, they did just that. For a while. Somebody dug his body up ten years later.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

Since Paine died a drunk in New York, very few people were present for his funeral. Wanting to give Paine a proper burial, newspaper editor William Cobbett and some friends exhumed Paine with the intent of moving his body to England.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

The only problem happened when the body got to England – Cobbett couldn’t afford the burial. The old editor stashed the remains in his attic, where Tom Paine remained until Cobbett died. After that, no one knows what happened to the Revolutionary author.

Articles

7 hilarious but accurate descriptions of military hardware

When it comes time to write up the technical pamphlets for the next generation of military gear, the manufacturers … probably won’t call us.


Here are seven perfectly accurate descriptions of military hardware that no self-respecting manufacturer would ever publish:

1. The Apache is the world’s most advanced digital camera

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
It’s a lot of money for relatively poor image quality, but the zoom is fantastic.

The AH-64 just has so many features that Canon and Nikon would never dream of putting on a camera: multiple rotor blades, a hydraulics systems, missiles, rockets, and a cannon. It’s almost hard to spot the camera sensors in the ball at the front.

2. The M1A2 Abrams tank provides very effective body armor for troops

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Does your armor deploy its own smoke grenades? And depleted uranium shells?

Because the armor is on motorized tracks, you can barely even feel the 60 tons of protection. It even has seats, a feature most body armor lacks.

3. The A-10 is a great way to get a look at the battlefield

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

It gets you high enough to see over the terrain while keeping you low enough to see all your enemies. If only there was something we could do about them from up here?

4. Navy aircraft carriers are cruise ships with (slightly) less sex and much more (hidden) booze

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

You can move a LOT of people with one of these ships. Over 6,000 with the old Nimitz-class. The newer Ford ships hold less people, normally about 4,000, but have sweet magnets that could hold literally anything to a fridge. In a pinch, there’s even a way to move people from shore directly to the ship without it docking. But be warned that the cruise directors are pretty uptight and the upper decks are noisy.

5. TOW missiles are a much faster delivery method than carrier pigeons

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
But, you know, they’re still faster than pigeons.

While carrier pigeons top out at around 90 mph in a sprint, TOW missiles fly at an astounding 715 mph. There’s almost nothing that can get your message across a battlefield faster, and the control cables let the recipient know just where the message came from.

Just a quick note, when sending messages to friends you should be sure to remove the original payload.

6. Rifles can punch holes through hella paper at once

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
(via Military Memes)

Don’t use boring three-hole punches that can only handle a few sheets when these rifles can create either 5.56mm or 7.62mm openings in dozens of sheets of paper at once.

7. CS gas is a quick and effective decongestant

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

Neti pots are weird and pouring liquids through your sinus cavities can lead to brain parasites. 2-chlorobenzalmalononitrile has neither drawback and is extremely effective at helping you breathe free clearing your sinuses.

Articles

The 13 funniest military memes of the week

It’s memes day!


And do you have memes you want to see included next week? Hit us up on Facebook.

1. “Billy Mays here for the full metal jacket!” (via Sh-t My LPO Says)

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

2. Should’ve studied (via Sh-t My LPO Says).

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
If he had scored any lower, he might’ve had to join the Army.

SEE ALSO: The 17 most hardcore WWII Air Corps Bomber Jackets

3. You have your chain of command, the NCO support channel … (via Air Force Memes and Humor)

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
… and then you have the guys who actually make decisions.

4.  Junior enlisted can’t get no respect (via Air Force Memes and Humor).

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

5. When you’ve spend just a little too much time at home (via Air Force Memes and Humor).

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

6. A clean ship is a safe ship (via Sh-t My LPO Says).

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
You don’t want to see what happens when you skip painting.

7. “Mom, really, I love you. It’s just …” (Via Out Of Regs)

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

8. See? This is why you’re supposed to leave the post after you retire (via Air Force Memes and Humor).

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Come on. You’re caught. Just salute.

9. Sure. It’s funny when he shows up at berthing with all those tacos (via Sh-t My LPO Says).

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

10. Purell. Nearly as good as inspections at keeping recruits awake (via Air Force Memes and Humor).

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Veterans know to just mix dip with their energy drinks.

11. They’re going to take on a lot of water when they pull out of port.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Probably less likely to damage a World War II monument though.

 12. How about a date with democracy?

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

13. No matter how many times you tell them, this still happens.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Side note, does that pilot in the foreground know how to curl his fingers at the position of attention? Or does an NCO need to go correct him?

NOW: 9 things new chief petty officers do when they put on khakis

AND: Marines Improvise an awesome waterslide during a rainstorm

Articles

The best and the worst Air Force recruiting slogans of all time

The U.S. Air Force has had many recruiting slogans, used at various times to varying effect. The current Air Force slogan “Aim High, Fly-Fight-Win” is no “We’re Looking For A Few Good Men” or “The Few The Proud, The Marines.” But yet the USAF continues its effort to come up with something as sticky as “Semper Fi.”


24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Not happening.

Marine Corps slogan recognition will always beat any branch (and even some national brands… there are studies on this), but Air Force advertising has been like the Cleveland Browns trying to find a quarterback – they were on to something early, but after a while, it got confusing.

Here’s WATM’s list of Air Force slogans ranked from the best ideas to the worst:

1. “Aim High”

Easily the best slogan the Air Force ever used. Aim High is so good, the Air Force had to bring it back. It’s fast, snappy, memorable, and says all you need to know: we think we’re the best branch, so why try to join the Army or Navy? I don’t know why they changed it and they probably couldn’t tell you either but whatever they changed it to had to be the Merrill McPeak uniform of Air Force slogan.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
That was the most Air Force joke ever made.

2. “Uno Ab Alto (One From on High)”

This sounds less like Airmen and more like Gandalf the Gray. Or a Harry Potter spell. Looking for that badass Latin quote will get you into trouble, Air Force. I can’t fault them too much because this was before Aim High. Uno Ab Alto gets #2 because it’s a classier way of saying “Death From Above” (Mors Ab Alto) which I think is a far better recruiting slogan for the Drone Age. If you want to attract more drone pilots, just say what you mean.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
The 7th Bomb Wing is ahead of the game.

3. “Aim High . . . Fly-Fight-Win”

Sloganeering as a result of surveys, meetings, and calls for suggestions: the true Air Force way. This latest iteration of “Aim High” ranks as #3 because it’s riding the coattails of #1.

This will likely not be replaced for a long time considering the amount of research, time, and money effort spent on coming up with it. It shouldn’t be a surprise to Air Force veterans that the Air Force put so much into changing their slogan only to lean on one they used a decade or so ago and adding a college fight song to it.

If they wanted to use things Airmen naturally say to each other as a recruiting slogan, they should have just listened to Airmen in squadron hallways, but this would probably result in the Air Force slogan being “Have a great Air Force day” “Happy Hour?” or “See you tomorrow, Doug.”

4. “The Sky’s No Limit”

Harkening back to the Air Force’s Cold War glory days, The Sky’s No Limit is actually not a bad one to fall back on if we’re just going to start resurrecting old lines. The test pilots of the days of yore were pretty ballsy, and with the Air Force’s expanding missions as an Air and Space Force, this is a good descriptive slogan, even if it’s a little vague.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Airman Snuffy just brings his buddies on the flightline, NBD.

The only real problem with this is a lot of the Air Force doesn’t really fly so for them, the sky’s no limit, but getting there certainly is. Believe it or not, some people who join the Air Force don’t want to fly. The fighting and winning are fun, though.

5. “Do Something Amazing”

While the Air Force has some heroic people working in incredible career fields (that is, people who do those amazing somethings), it also has cooks, plumbers, and lawyers. All are necessary to the Air Force mission (and are true-blue lifesavers when you really want or need one – trust me, you want these people to be your friends), but these aren’t the careers you think of when you’re considering joining the military. You might be disappointed when you’re thinking about all the amazing AFSCs you’ll cross-train into the moment you can. At least they’re not patronizing people by framing additional duties as a great activity.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Marines probably do this.

Actually, you know what’s amazing? Spending an entire enlistment without ever having to see Tops In Blue.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
And at air shows.

Also, “amazing” is what a sorority girl calls her summer study abroad program in London.

6. “We Do The Impossible Everyday”

… And we do the hyperbolic so much more. Read some USAF EPRs for the most flowery language you’ve ever seen. The thesaurus was created for Air Force performance reviews. You need one to make it sound like your creepy subordinate deserves a goddamn medal for volunteering to watch people pee.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
The sky’s no limit.

This line looks like the Air Force doesn’t know the meaning of the word impossible (Which is a much better slogan. Air Force, call me). The biggest problem with this slogan is that they also do the very, very possible all the time. Not every one gets the “impossible” job.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
What’s she holding? Wait, They read from dead trees? MAGIC.

You know what’s possible? Getting booted out for your third alcohol-related incident because Frank’s Franks won’t put hot dogs on Anthony’s Pizza. You know who makes that possible? Air Force JAGs and security forces.

7. “No One Comes Close”

This wouldn’t have been so bad in retrospect, except you know who comes close? The Navy. They also have fighters and stuff. Not exactly the same missions, I know, but… close enough to make this slogan awkward.

8. “Cross Into The Blue”

This nebulous Blue. Context tells you it’s the sky but the ocean is also blue, for the record, and it’s a much more tangible blue to cross into. This would be a better line for trying to get Army people to come to the Air Force, but I doubt that would be the goal (Airmen use the term “Army Proof” for a reason).

9. “It’s Not Science Fiction, It’s What We Do Everyday”

This would be a better slogan for Scientology. I don’t remember Orson Scott Card writing about drone strikes in Pakistan but maybe somewhere a six-year-old is playing video games and ending terrorists. No one confuses drones with alien technology. The Internet had been around for a long time when these ads started. So too with night vision. Until DARPA puts those Iron Man suits in field tests, no one will ever make that connection.

America’s Airmen (for the most part) are not delusional about themselves. They don’t need to be. For all the “Chair Force” smack Airman take from other branches, troops like Ammo are awesome in their own way and don’t need to pretend they’re all combat controllers.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Except Mondays between 1100 and 1400.

10. “We’ve Been Waiting For You”

Slightly ominous, it doesn’t really inspire as much as it implies the Air Force has been watching you while you sleep, staring at you from across crowded rooms, and following you home after school.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

11. “Above All”

Unfinished thoughts probably always seem like a great idea for a slogan in meetings. Sure, I get the idea of putting your branch above everyone else’s as a way to foster esprit de corps, but it can be troublesome sometimes.

Every branch has their strengths, so let’s be real. Unlike this Air Force Training Instructor:

Another reason this slogan ranks so low is the lack of originality. Uber alles (above all) is the German national anthem.

12. “A Great Way of Life”

An older slogan which probably seemed appropriate for a time when the Air Force has to pull people from living the American Dream and get them into the Air Force, where they would sleep on the flightline and be prepared to bomb Russians into the Stone Age 24/7.

The Airmen of the Strategic Air Command era were pretty badass in their own right. Nowadays, this would mean highlighting the golf course, gym, the dorms (and the Airmen who live there), the DFAC, and all the stupid shit young Airmen tend to do when they get to their first duty station.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

Lists

5 things enlisted troops love but officers hate

No matter what branch you serve in, there will always be a solid line between enlisted personnel and officers — they rarely understand each other.


Enlisted troops do some crazy sh*t, which causes officers to get in a bad mood — and vice versa.

Most officers want their troops to abide by all the rules and regulations while the members of the E-4 mafia just want to push the envelope as often as possible and have a little fun.

Related: 6 reasons why you need a sense of humor in the infantry

So check out five things enlisted troops love, but officers freakin’ hate — according to our resident military officers.

5. Practical jokes

We all love to play some grab ass to liven up a dull situation, and some jokes do go too far — f*ck it. Once the principal officer shows up, consider the fun is over. Most officers aren’t fans of practical jokes especially if they’re the butt of that joke — but enlisted folks love it!

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Don’t think an officer can’t prank their troops right back. They did graduate from college.

(Note: I’m told this doesn’t apply to pilots…)

 4. Mustaches

It’s common for service members to grow mustaches — especially on deployment. The military has strict grooming standards for all facial hair and officers keep a close eye out on them. We wouldn’t want a single hair follicle to fell out of line — we’d probably end up losing the war.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Master Sgt. Bryan McCoy, Staff Sgt. Clayton Morris, and Master Sgt. Anthony Foster show off their whiskers that were grown for Mustache March, March 27, 2014, at Dover Air Force Base, Del. (U.S. Air Force photo: Airman 1st Class Zachary Cacicia)

(Note: The exception appears to be “Movember”)

3. Dipping tobacco while standing duty

Sometimes we need a nicotine fix and aren’t allowed to walk outside for a smoke. So we tend to dip tobacco and leave the spit bottles laying around. We’ll give this one to the officers since spit cups aren’t sexy.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
At least he’s not just spitting it on the ground. Keeping it in a clear bottle is a much better idea. (Source: Pinterest)

Also Read: 6 ways you can tell a troop isn’t an infantryman

2. Out PTing their company commanders

When you’re just starting out in a leadership position and trying to lead from the front — no officer wants to get beaten in a sprint contest by someone who just graduated high school 6-months ago.

It’s probably why enlisted troops always have to run at the officer’s pace.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Lt. Col. David Bardorf and Sgt. Maj. Michael Rowan lead their battalion on a run during the annual battalion’s physical training session to support the Combined Federal Campaign. (U.S. Marine Corps photo: Lance Cpl. Nik S. Phongsisattanak)

1. Buying expensive vehicles right out the gate

Some branches are supposed to clear significant purchases with their command before executing on the sale. This system helps the enlisted troop from blowing his or her already low paycheck on a car with 30% APR — that’s bad.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Troops love buying brand new trucks — until they have to actually pay for it. (Source: Ford)

Can you think of any others? Comment below.

Articles

12 signs you may be ‘motarded’

It’s perfectly fine to love the military and take pride in serving, but some go way above and beyond as “motards.”


While it’s not politically correct, the commonly-used term describes some people in the military that are so motivated, it annoys everyone around them. Stemming from “moto” — short for motivation — the term “is used to describe some overbearing [Marine or soldier] who [is] extremely loud and obnoxious all the time. He is so motivated even in the sh–tiest situations that everyone wants to kick him in the teeth,” according to Urban Dictionary’s hilarious description.

We all know at least one of these people. If any of the following sounds a little too familiar, then it just might be you.

1. You use the term “behoove” and you are dead serious about it.

It’s often sounded out, like “be-who-of-you,” which is actually not a thing. But you’d never know that, having listened to your first sergeant tell you it would “be-who-of-you to make sure you have a designated driver if you’re going to drink this weekend.” We get it, behoove is a real word. Doesn’t make it any better when you say it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=16v=dw6HQ1wGClo

2. There’s an inspirational quote in your email signature block.

There’s no across-the-board standardized format in the military for what’s supposed to be in your email signature block, but most people put something along the lines of their name, rank, and phone number. Then there are others who want to jam in their email address (Why? We know your email address, you sent us a freaking email), an inspirational quote that gets an eye-roll from most recipients, and a two-page-long message saying the contents of the email are private. Thanks, we got it.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

3. You speak in the third person.

They should really pass a law against this.

4. Your closet is filled with military t-shirts, including one that has your rank on it.

If you’re a young private or PFC and you are rocking that sweet military t-shirt showing the ladies your name is Tactical Tommy, we can let this one slide (only for your first six months in). But if you are out in public wearing a shirt with your rank on it, good Lord. Head on down to the Gap or something. We heard they have good sales.

5. When you hear a question, you repeat it back to the person, and then add, “was that your question?”

This may be a Marine Corps-centric thing. As part of the Corps’ formal instructor training, most learn the proper way to answer a question is to repeat it back word-for-word, ask “was that your question?” and then proceed to answer the question. This method is certainly good for a big room full of people so they all know what the question was, but not so good when you’re at the dinner table.

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color

6. You have a “screaming eagle” haircut and actually think it looks good.

Bonus points if you have the infamous “horse shoe.” When you go to basic training, you get your head shaved as a way of saying goodbye to the old civilian you. Then over time, you “earn” back some of that hair as you move along in training. While you should keep your hair relatively short for regulation’s sake, that doesn’t mean you should have the military equivalent of a mohawk (or moto-hawk, if you will).

If you have any questions, please refer to the glorious flowing locks of “Chesty” Puller or Medal of Honor recipients John Basilone and Audie Murphy.

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7. You’ve corrected someone on their civilian attire when you were off base.

You may think you’re maintaining good order and discipline at all times, but what you are really doing is being a dick. Instead of jumping on someone you don’t even know for a supposed civilian attire violation at the local gas station, how about you just let this one slide? We’re quite sure the apocalypse won’t happen as a result.

8. You actually think running with a gas mask on is fun.

We’re not saying running with a gas mask is a bad idea. Plenty of troops serving during the 2003 Iraq invasion would probably think being prepared physically to operate in that environment is a good thing. But running with a gas mask is not, nor will it ever, be fun.

9. You won’t ever put your hands in your pockets in civilian clothing and think people who do so are “nasty.”

Despite what you may have heard, pockets have incredible functionality, to include being able to hold keys, change, and ID cards. They can even keep hands warm! But perhaps most shockingly of all, putting your hands into the pockets of your jeans has no bearing on whether you are a good or bad soldier.

10. You require civilians to address you by your rank.

No.

11. There is a giant vinyl sticker showing all the ribbons you’ve ever been awarded on the back window of your lifted pickup truck.

One of the tenets of selfless service is the thought that you serve without the expectation of recognition or gain. You know, modesty and all that good stuff they teach you at boot camp. No one cares that you have three Good Conduct Medals and they certainly don’t want to see it while they are sitting behind you in rush hour traffic.

And take off those idiotic “Truck Nutz” for Chrissakes.

12. As soon as you get promoted to NCO, you tell your best friends they need to address you by your rank.

You were literally a lance corporal with the rest of us 27 seconds ago. Get the hell out of here.

NOW: The top 5 military-themed songs that aren’t written by Toby Keith

popular

6 things troops always buy after deployment

When troops deploy overseas to places like Iraq and Afghanistan, they usually get a pay increase thanks to combat and hazardous pay bonuses. And given that they are working longer days and away from most of the comforts of home, they usually save a bunch of money in that time.


Usually returning with a large balance in their bank account, they are what some would call “post-deployment rich.”

But that wealth usually doesn’t last forever. Some troops save their money for the future, while others making big purchases soon after they are home. These are the six things they are usually buying.

1. A new car or motorcycle

 

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The barracks parking lot is guaranteed to be filled with new cars and bikes shortly after a unit returns from deployment. The vehicular staple of the returning Marine, soldier, sailor, or airman usually spans the gamut of Ford Mustang to Jeep Wrangler.

That’s it. The barracks parking lot is just filled with Mustangs and Wranglers. That and a ton of crotch rockets.

2. Post-deployment booze

 

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Photo Credit: Streetwear Deals

I’m not going to lie. When I came back after a seven-month deployment to Afghanistan, I drank a lot. Think—drinking at a minimum a six-pack of beer every night for months—a lot. Was it healthy? No. A good idea? No. Helpful during morning PT? Oh, good lord no.

But hey, I hadn’t drank in a long time and I had to make up for lost time. At least that made sense in my then-21-year-old brain. My story is not unique, however. While the military tries to crack down on binge-drinking, for many troops, it’s still a big part of the lifestyle.

3. Epic parties in Vegas (or some other awesome place)

When you are post-deployment rich, it’s no problem picking up the tab at the bar. “Oh yeah! I got this,” the young private says. “Drinks are on me!” Come back to this same young private about two months later and he probably won’t be saying this one again.

That’s definitely true of throwing big parties. While they initially start out in the barracks and involve kegs, beer pong, and midget-tossing (no? that’s not allowed Sergeant Major?), the parties eventually head off base to a better location. Sometimes this means the strip club, but let it be known: Las Vegas is always the best option.

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Just don’t buy the next item while you are drinking.

4. Engagement rings

Spending seven to 12 months (or more) overseas can get some service members thinking about elevating their relationships to the next level of marriage. For some, that means saving up their deployment cash to buy an expensive engagement ring for their honey. Hopefully it all works out, because if it doesn’t, the post-deployment splurge may be spent on…

5. Divorce lawyers are, unfortunately, another common deployment side effect

 

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Most service members have heard a horror story or two about a fellow soldier returning home with no greeting at the airport, a completely empty refrigerator (even sans ice cubes), and an empty bank account. The sad homecoming for some troops means one thing: Divorce.

6. Tattoos

There’s a good reason why tattoo parlors are strategically located near military bases. Troops love ink (including this writer). Whether it’s a simple U.S. Army or USMC on your arm to show pride in your service, or a listing of fallen friends, tattoos are a big part of the military culture.

Just make sure you get it spell-checked.

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What did you buy right after deployment? Let us know in the comments.

Lists

3 reasons why yelling cadences will get you through a tough workout

Service members spends countless hours stomping across the base, running in formation while yelling a repetitive song at the top of their lungs.

Military cadences, or close-order drills, date back hundreds of years as a way to keep troops aligned as they march onto the battlefield. Today, it’s primarily used to keep service members in step as they run, landing their feet at the same time to create a motivating, captivating rhythm.


Not only are these repetitive songs catchy as f*ck, but they’ll also test out your creative side as you can make up the lyrics on the spot. A good cadence call will ignite your fellow troops’ morale, helping them make it through the miles and miles of running we do each time we gear up for PT.

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Don’t fall out.

It teaches leadership and confidence

The cadence caller has an important job when they’re running on the left side of the formation. They need to make sure the troops are in step as you emphasize each of the word being yelled out. It’s excellent practice how to lead a pack of service members toward an objective at once, and no signal-caller wants to be seen following out of a run.

You’ll look dumb.

You can talk sh*t to other units

The military is full of competition, and we love it. On that note, we commonly run through other areas of the base that our military rivals call home. Since we can easily control what lyrics we yell during our PT sessions, we’re sometimes guilty of creating sh*t talking ones as we move in and through those areas.

No grunt wants to be seen falling out of a run in a near a POG barracks. That just looks bad.

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It helps you control your breathing

Since we commonly yell out the cadence lyrics at the top of our lungs, this act helps expel the CO2 out of our lungs and allows us to gain endurance. The more controlled our breathing becomes, the more oxygen we can deliver to our bodies. It also helps troops take their mind off the fact they are running for miles if the troop is concerning on repeating the cadences correctly.

It’s also pretty motivating, and we use that to get us through those tough runs.

Lists

34 things military spouses wish they knew sooner

24 historic photos made even more amazing with color
Photo: US Army


No matter how familiar you are with the military culture, no matter how prepared you think you are to embrace it, when you say “I do” to someone who wears combat boots to work every day, there are things you will learn that may never have occurred to you. Some of us pick up on those things quickly, and some of us are still (after decades of this life) figuring things out on a daily basis. We asked a group of our incredible Military Spouse contributors to share some of the things they really wish they had known early on. We want to know, what would you add to this list?

Contributors: Stacy Huisman, MJ Boice, Erin Whitehead, Cassandra Bratcher, Morgan Slade, Kama Shockey, Ashley Frisch, Kate Dolack, Kiera Durfee, Davelda Edgington, Michelle Aikman

  1. I wish I had known to give up on planning as soon as possible. The sooner you give in to having no set plan, the easier everything becomes.
  2. Honestly, I wish I understood what a valuable resource military spouses can be – instead of being afraid.
  3. I wish I had taken all those classes specifically for spouses a lot sooner.
  4. I wish I had known it was okay to ask questions sooner. And who would have the answers! (Hint: It is not usually the service member)
  5. I wish I had known to accept that my husband doesn’t and never will have a set schedule, so I can’t really plan much ahead of time.
  6. I wish I knew how unbreakable military spouse bonds could be.
  7. I wish I had immersed myself in our community sooner. I thought being a National Guard spouse meant being a loner in the military realm, but have come to find that there is a great deal of support and camaraderie.
  8. I wish I had realized that rank shouldn’t be a factor in friendships. We are all in the same boat and anyone who ever tells you they can’t be your friend due to rank isn’t a person you want to associate with anyway.
  9. I wish I had known that it is okay to have a life outside of the military and your military spouse friends.
  10. I wish I had become more involved in the local community, outside of the base, sooner.
  11. I wish I had worried less what others might think of me. If I want to wear a hundred shirts proudly displaying my spouses branch of service…then I will!
  12. I wish I had been more of a tourist at every duty station. There are so many local things I wish I had experienced in every place we lived over the years.
  13. I wish someone had explained what “hurry up and wait” really meant.
  14. I wish I knew that you CAN have a successful career you can take with you everywhere.
  15. I wish I knew we truly are like a family. We have our issues in this community, but when someone tries to attack one of us, we rise up and come to their defense…even we don’t personally know him or her.
  16. I wish that I had known that even though the mission comes first, I don’t always come last. (Understanding THAT little nugget might have diffused an argument or two over time.)
  17. I wish I knew that you can be eligible for unemployment when you lose your job due to transfer!
  18. I wish I knew not to buy expensive furniture in the first year of marriage – only to anxiously watch it moved six times in ten years. Needless to say my stuff is gently bruised, but the upside is discovering the world of IKEA!
  19. I wish I knew I didn’t always have to have a stiff upper lip.
  20. Actually, I didn’t know anything coming into this life and I am kind of glad that was the case! It allowed me to experience baptism by fire and I’m not sure I would have as much faith in myself as I do now if I hadn’t experienced it that way.
  21. I wish I had known to ALWAYS purchase refundable/transferable/changeable tickets, lodging, etc.
  22. I wish I had known how hard it can be to find a career again. I wouldn’t have worried so much and would have enjoyed the new experiences much more…instead of being on a constant job hunt.
  23. I wish I had started planning for retirement years before it is recommended your family does so.
  24. I wish I had taken the time to laugh more, and curse less, when Murphy came to visit. Again.
  25. I wish I had known from the beginning that our collective voices can move mountains and create significant change!
  26. I wish I had known moving overseas is not only harder, but exponentially so. And more complicated. And more expensive.
  27. I wish I had known that reintegration was going to be harder than the deployment itself.~I wish I had known that it was okay to ask for help…that it is not a sign of weakness.
  28. I wish I had known how fast it would go by!
  29. I wish I hadn’t felt the need to spout off my resume to every spouse I met when I first married into military life. It was a sign of insecurity, walking away from my career. Little did I know many other spouses had similar feelings.
  30. I wish I had given my friends who did not understand military life a little more of a break. I now know that you simply can’t understand if you haven’t lived it.
  31. I wish I had learned the signs of PTSD and Combat/Operational Stress sooner…and knew how to help my spouse get the help they deserve.
  32. I wish I knew how strong I would become.
  33. I wish I knew that my definition of “home” and “family” would change over time.
  34. I wish I knew that this life is like a roller coaster. We put on that harness and hang on for the ride, even if we beg for them to stop it sometimes, we barrel along a single track with no control over many parts. We may hit some walls hat are slow to come, then we barrel down. Others are abrupt, we feel our stomachs drop out at the low parts but we also get to throw our hands up in the air! We enjoy the thrill with the other riders then embrace each other when it’s over and say, “that was a wild ride, I would do it again with you guys any time.”

More from Military Spouse:

This article originally appeared at Military Spouse Copyright 2015. Follow Military Spouse on Twitter.

Articles

These are the 6 worst carriers (or classes) to ever set sail

Some aircraft carriers are legends – either from long service like that of USS Enterprise (CVN 65) or with an unmatched war record like that of another USS Enterprise (CV 6).


They have either heroic sacrifices, the way USS Yorktown (CV 5) did at Midway, or they simply take a ton of abuse as USS Franklin (CV 13) did.

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The aircraft carrier USS Enterprise (CVN 65) transits the Arabian Sea during her last deployment. (U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 3rd Class Jared King)

But some carriers just stink. You wouldn’t wish them on your worst enemy… or maybe you would, simply to make the war easier. There’s arguments on both sides of that. Here are the carriers that would prompt such an internal debate.

6. USS Ranger (CV 4)

When America was down to one carrier in the South Pacific in 1942, re-deploying America’s first purpose-built carrier, the USS Ranger (CV 4) was not considered as an option.

That tells you something about the ship. Her combat career was relatively brief, and she eventually was relegated to training duties. Still, she had a decent air group (mostly fighters and dive-bombers), so she is the best of this bad lot.

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USS Ranger (CV 4) at sea. (US Navy photo)

5. Admiral Kuznetsov Class (Kuznetsov, Liaoning, and unnamed Type 001A)

If you’ve read a lot of WATM, then you know about the Kuznetsov Follies. The crappy engines (the Russians send tugs along with her in case of breakdown), the splash landings, and the fact the Russians ended up using her as a glorified ferry all speak to real problems. In her favor, though, is the presence of 12 long-range anti-ship missiles on the lead ship, and she can fly MiG-29K and Su-33 Flankers off her deck. China’s versions carry J-15 fighters, but not the missiles.

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‘Admiral Kuznetsov’ in her natural habitat, a dry dock, in July 2015. | Christopher Michel/Flickr photo

4. Kiev class (Kiev, Minsk, Novorossiysk)

The Russian Kiev and her sisters are on here for a crap air wing.

The Yak-38 Forger was one of the worst planes to ever operate from a carrier. The Kiev gets a higher ranking largely because she had a lot of firepower, including eight SS-N-12 Sandbox missiles as well as a lot of SA-N-3 Goblets and point-defense systems, which were arguably more of a threat to the enemy than the planes she carried.

Yeah… that kinda has the whole purpose backwards. Now, a modern version with F-35Bs or even AV-8B+ Harriers and the Aegis system could be interesting.

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The Soviet aircraft carrier Kiev, showing off elements of the crap air wing, including the Yak-38 Forger. (US Navy photo)

3. HTMS Chakri Naruebet

The Chakri Naruebet from the Thai navy is on the list not so much for inherent problems, but because of substantial air wing neglect during the reign of King Bhumibol Adulyadej (aka Rana IX). Worse, the Thais officially call her an “offshore patrol helicopter carrier.”

They did buy some second-hand AV-8S Matadors from Spain. But most flunked the maintenance, and soon Thailand had one flyable jet. At least the Kievs had heavy firepower to make up for their crap air wing!

That said, his successor, King Vajiralongkorn, was a former fighter pilot, and hopefully will be able to turn things around.

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Photo: PH3 Alex C. Witte/US Navy

2. Ise Class battleship/carrier hybrid conversions

Okay, in some ways, this is understandable. After the Battle of Midway, Japan needed carriers in the worst possible way. Ise and Hyuga are perfect examples of getting those “carriers” — in the worst possible way.

Initially built as battleships with a top speed of 23 knots, they got turned not into full carriers, which might have been useful. But a half-battleship/half-carrier holding 22 seaplanes (okay about 50 percent more than Hosho) that they could launch and recover wasn’t totally awful.

Remember that’s seaplanes, not Zeroes for fighter cover or strike planes. Granted Japan had the A6M-2 Rufe, a seaplane Zero, but this was a rush job, and it showed. At least they each had eight 14-inch guns.

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The HIJMS Ise was a failed battleship/carrier hybrid. (Photo from Wikimedia Commons)

 

1. HIJMS Hosho

This was the world’s first purpose-built aircraft carrier. But let’s be honest, the Japanese boat was a dog. It had a top speed of 25 knots, and it carried all of 15 planes. During the Battle of Midway, it had eight biplanes.

By comparison, USS Langley (CV 1), America’s first aircraft carrier, could carry 36 planes. Even with a top speed of 15 knots, she would have been useful escorting convoys in the Atlantic – if America hadn’t turned her into a seaplane tender to satisfy an arms-control treaty Japan violated anyhow.

Are there any bad carriers we missed? Let us know in the comments!

 

Articles

The 13 funniest military memes of the week

We know you don’t read this part, just scroll to the memes already.


1. It’s a good slogan, but not always the best game (via Military Memes).

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2. 98.6 degree body temperatures are a crutch (via 11 Bravos).

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Besides, if you actually get hypothermia, you’ll get Motrin.

SEE ALSO: 4 military fails so awful they’re actually hilarious

3. Go on, enjoy being more hardcore than the Air Force (via 11 Bravos).

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They’ll keep enjoying T.V.s and footrests.

4. This is the face of your enemy:

(via Military Memes)

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Honestly expected them to be more invade-y than this.

5. One of these things is not like the others (via NavyMemes.com).

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But hey, maybe no one will notice.

6. Heaven: Where all the insurgents are literally demons.

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But, Chesty Puller is your commander, so there’s that.

7. Prior service level: Almost (via 11 Bravos).

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8. Coast Guard: Nearly as challenging as college (via Cost Guard Memes).

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Just kidding. No it isn’t.

9. “Let’s do two poses.”

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10. Make a difference (via Military Memes).

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11. That feeling you get when you realize …

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… you COULD have given them real medicine.

 12. Remember to check your sleeve when the retention NCO comes around (via Military Memes).

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On the plus side, this guy is eligible to retire.

13. Everyone uses what they need to get the job done.

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It’s just that the Air Force’s job is a little less intense.

NOW: The 7 biggest ‘Blue Falcons’ in US military history

OR: The 15 coolest unit nicknames in the US military

Lists

The 5 fighter aircraft of the US Air Force

The Air Force has a different kind of plane for every task, but its fighter jets are often its most visible aircraft, carrying out a variety of missions over any kind of terrain.

The first F-15 arrived in the early 1970s, and the highly advanced (though technically troubled) F-35 came online in the past few years. In that period, the Air Force’s fighters have operated all over the world, adapting to new challenges in order to dominate the battlefield and control the skies.


Below, you can see each of the fighter jets the Air Force has in service:

1. F-15 Eagle

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First Lt. Charles Schuck fires an AIM-7 Sparrow medium range air-to-air missile from an F-15 Eagle here while supporting a Combat Archer air-to-air weapons system evaluation program mission.
(US Air Force photo by Master Sgt. Michael Ammons)

The F-15 is an all-weather, highly maneuverable tactical fighter designed to gain and maintain air superiority over the battlefield. It first became operational in 1975 and has been the Air Force’s primary fighter jet and intercept platform for decades.

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An F-15 Eagle from the 142nd Fighter Wing takes off from Portland Air National Guard Base in Oregon during an operational-readiness inspection.
(US Air Force photo by Senior Airman John Hughel)

The F-15’s superior maneuverability and acceleration are achieved through high engine thrust-to-weight ratio and low wing loading, or the ratio of aircraft weight to its wing area. Combined with the high thrust-to-weight ratio, low wing loading lets the aircraft turn tightly without losing airspeed.

The F-15’s multimission avionics system includes the pilot’s head-up display, which projects all essential flight information gathered by the integrated avionics system onto the windscreen. This display allows the pilot to track and destroy an enemy aircraft without having to look down at cockpit instruments.

2. F-15E Strike Eagle

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An F-15E Strike Eagle over Afghanistan. The F-15E’s primary role in Afghanistan is providing close-air support for ground troops.
(US Air Force photo by Staff Sgt. Aaron Allmon)

The F-15E Strike Eagle is a two-seat variant of the F-15 Eagle that became operational in late 1989. It is a dual-role fighter designed for air-to-air and air-to-ground missions.

It can operate day or night, at low altitude, and in all weather conditions, thanks to an array of avionics and electronics systems.

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An F-15E dropping a bomb.
(US Air Force photo by Master Sgt. Lance Cheung)

“One of the most important additions to the F-15E is the rear cockpit, and the weapons systems officer,” the Air Force says. “On four screens, this officer can display information from the radar, electronic warfare or infrared sensors, monitor aircraft or weapons status and possible threats, select targets, and use an electronic ‘moving map’ to navigate.”

3. F-16 Fighting Falcon

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An F-16 Fighting Falcon from the Arizona Air National Guard’s 162nd Wing, April 8, 2015.
(U.S. Air Force photo)

The F-16 is a compact, multirole fighter that first became operational in early 1979. It has all-weather operating capability and better maneuverability and combat radius against potential adversaries.

There are more than 1,000 in service, and it is able to fulfill a number of roles, including air-to-air combat, ground attack, and electronic warfare.

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An F-16 pilot over Iraq can been seen wearing a Santa hat during a Christmas Day operation, December 25, 2016.
(U.S. Defense Department photo)

“It provides a relatively low-cost, high-performance weapon system for the United States and allied nations,” the Air Force says.

4. F-22 Raptor

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A US Air Force F-22 Raptor fighter aircraft over Alaska after refueling January 5, 2013.
(U.S. Air Force photo)

The F-22, introduced in late 2005, is considered the US Air Force’s first 5th-generation fighter. It’s low-observable technology gives it an advantage over air-to-air and surface-to-air threats.

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(Photo by Todd Miller)

“The F-22 … is designed to project air dominance, rapidly and at great distances and defeat threats attempting to deny access to our nation’s Air Force, Army, Navy and Marine Corps,” the Air Force says.

5. F-35A Lightning II

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The first F-35A Lightning II to land at Hill Air Force Base, Utah, arrives Sept. 13, 2013.
(U.S. Air Force photo)

The F-35A is the most recent addition to the Air Force’s fighter ranks. Variants are being built for the Air Force, Marine Corps, and Navy.

It’s designed to replace aging fighter and attack platforms, including the A-10 Thunderbolt and F-16.

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The first external-weapons test mission flown by an F-35A Conventional Takeoff and Landing aircraft, at Edwards Air Force Base, California, February 16, 2012.
(Lockheed Martin photo)

F-35s have been introduced to some air forces, but the program is still in development in the US and continues to face challenges.

The Pentagon said in April 2018 that it would stop accepting most deliveries of the jet from Lockheed Martin because of a dispute over which party was responsible for the cost of a production error found in 2017.

This article originally appeared on Business Insider. Follow @BusinessInsider on Twitter.